|
How to shave the Superman logo onto your chest: for the best removal of coarse, gritty male hair, I recommend hair removal cream. I was skeptical when ZUG first asked me to review Revitol Hair Removal Cream, but now that I'm Superman, I heartily endorse it.
See! It worked perfectly!
Actually those pictures are from my failed first attempt. You see, some of the woodland creatures that live in my chest hair sabotaged the experiment that time. Either that, or my hair was too long. I had to try again after trimming my hair and evicting the gnomes. Shaving the Superman logo onto your chest (or your dog's back ... I'm not here to pass judgment) is a simple task. All that's required is hair removal cream, some sort of cardboard or thick paper, a utility knife, and lipstick. Beer helps, but isn't strictly necessary. The first step is to print a picture of the Superman logo from the web. You then have two options for making a stencil. Method #1: You can place the picture over some thick paper (I used paper designed for business cards) and cut out the shape with a utility knife. Method #2: You can ask your girlfriend to do Method #1 for you.
The next step is to trace the stencil on your chest. I recommend using lipstick. It's easy to see, and washes away quickly when you're done. Furthermore, if someone walks in on you while you're doing this, you can simply explain that you were receiving a blow job from a very confused girl.
Helpful hint: If you're taking photos of this process for a website, be sure to add "kiss marks" to your cheek with the lipstick first, so that you can look like a total dork in front of the entire world.
Next, carefully apply the hair removal cream between the lipstick lines. If it doesn't smell like a high school chemistry lab, you're doing something wrong.
You should wait about 20 minutes before removing the cream. (If you have beer, drink 2-3.) I used Q-Tips to remove most of the hair before showering.
When I stepped out of the shower, I discovered that I was Superman. Unfortunately, there seems to have been a problem with my camera and it's difficult to make out my rock hard abs:
However, something was still missing. Sure, the Revitol had made me super, but was I super super? Before I started leaping off tall buildings and attempting to fly, I had one more idea.
.
| ||||||||||
|
|