John Hargrave 128,742 73
02/08/2002 02:52 PM

When we first began testing these new features, I was very disappointed by the threads you guys have rated "funniest." Some of them are hundreds of one-word posts caused by one person clicking his or her funny button again and again. If you look at the top-ranked conversations, Sperel the Goose is the only one who stands out as being funny on the board, and I know that's not true.



I'm really expecting better things from now on. Don't let me down.

Cap'n Stuby 17,826 13
02/08/2002 02:53 PM

You just got a straight face for taking my lightbulb and shovel away.

Superkitten with a Gameboy Advance™ in his butt 3,425 0
02/08/2002 02:54 PM

Yes, daaady Hargrave.

Cap'n Stuby 17,826 13
02/08/2002 02:55 PM

So now we can see who has the funniest stuff?





Yeesh, you'd think that this was some kind of web comedy board, huh?

Ray Smyrank 12 11
02/08/2002 02:55 PM

> new programmer, Mike Ward



um. erp?



"... I've already come up with:

a radically new rankings and ratings system for GAB"

Bonky 75,728 15
02/08/2002 02:55 PM

Change is new and scary and bad.



Change should only be used on toll roads.



I'm scared.



Stuby, hold me.

Crescent Fresh, Pee Chick 10,666 13
02/08/2002 02:56 PM

Are the ratings bars retroactive? I m ean to say,if someone clicked your smilie in an old conversation, will it show on these new bars?

Cap'n Stuby 17,826 13
02/08/2002 02:59 PM

Don't worry, Bonky. I'll attach my hands firmly to your taut buttocks so that the Greundsluefir can't steal your soul through your anus!!!

Ponzu 11 11
02/08/2002 03:01 PM

I don't get it.

Bonky 75,728 15
02/08/2002 03:01 PM

Grandsluffer? I don't even . . . . .



No wait, that always gets used.



My grandsluffer waled 10 miles in the snow to school. AND HE LIKED IT!

Bonky 75,728 15
02/08/2002 03:02 PM

I know. Greundsluefir. But those kinds of tree pop when you burn them!

Doc 7,105 13
02/08/2002 03:03 PM

Where Codeslave left off?





.. What happened to Codeslave? Dare I ask?

Squeamish 38,986 14
02/08/2002 03:03 PM

The bars do appear to be retroactive.

Cap'n Stuby 17,826 13
02/08/2002 03:04 PM

No, silly! I mean the monster from old Danish legend that comes into your earthen home and steals your soul by inserting it's mighty scaled phallus into your anus!

Cap'n Stuby 17,826 13
02/08/2002 03:04 PM

Maybe that's why you've been so depressed!

Superkitten with a Gameboy Advance™ in his butt 3,425 0
02/08/2002 03:05 PM

Codeslave exploded.

The Lady (Swamp Witch) Trixxie 65,021 15
02/08/2002 03:06 PM

What does my ranky meater look like ???? oh Oh, Please tell me, and I'll give you a (good) clickie, John, bad clickies are a bad idea, Emersons, Tavis, Moon RD are gonna go around being themselfs.

aushie 5,580 13
02/08/2002 03:06 PM

Mr. Hargrave said they are retroactive, right up there:



More importantly, at the conversation level, you can now see how your fellow users ranked each contribution you've ever made.

Bonky 75,728 15
02/08/2002 03:07 PM

Stuby, I'm depressed because the man that I love does not share my feelings.



I'm talking about you. Well, you and Warren Cheswick. I love you both. I don't care about your grandfather. I love you. LOVE LOVE LOVE.





Hey! I got my new license plates for the car. N08-___ NO Hate! Get it?

Cap'n Stuby 17,826 13
02/08/2002 03:08 PM

The ability to take away funny points is like giving us the ability to shock each other. See the episode of the Simpsons featuring their psychotherapy session....

Cap'n Stuby 17,826 13
02/08/2002 03:09 PM

Well, I can't love you as long as Warren Cheswick is around.



He's man enough for me!

Doc 7,105 13
02/08/2002 03:09 PM

Is there a percentage, or quality ranking?



I mean, does it just rank straight points, or points : how many posts you've made.



I guess it would be hard to get "true" rankings. Those of us who rarely post are only going to have a few points, no matter how funny we are, and also, those who post too much will reach a saturation point and there bar will always be about even.

Doc 7,105 13
02/08/2002 03:11 PM

Well, you can obviously see I've lost all the little funny I had earlier in this conversation.



I've already made an unfunny comment. Heaven help us.

Cap'n Stuby 17,826 13
02/08/2002 03:11 PM

But those of us with enemies (I've got more than my share) won't ever get a full bar.





See? All that evil and nothing to show for it!

Ponzu 11 11
02/08/2002 03:13 PM

What we'll need is an arcane structure of alliances to ensure that those in our alliance get funny clicks while sabotaging the funny of our enemies.



The GAB Hegemony shall be ONE!

The Lady (Swamp Witch) Trixxie 65,021 15
02/08/2002 03:16 PM

Duh, Do you really think the multi clickie people are ALL THAT funny ???? dump ass, Shakespeare there go my (good) clickies

Friggo the Klown 5 11
02/08/2002 03:18 PM

I'll always click on you, Princess Trixxie.

Yippy, Bonky's toady 3,028 13
02/08/2002 03:19 PM

Does this increase my chances of winning the car?

Scooter Brown 19,936 13
02/08/2002 03:19 PM

I don't get it. How come there are people with fewer smileys than me higher on the quality list than me.

Cap'n Stuby 17,826 13
02/08/2002 03:21 PM

Because only a select few people understand how the system works. The rest of us just blunder on with no real knowledge.





Much like the US economy.

Nutbutter - Merchandise now Available! 181,255 35
02/08/2002 03:25 PM

I think we should have funny handicaps.



For example, if Vicar says something funny he should only get a small percentage increse whereas if Mel Haber says something that doesn't sound retarded she should win a cash prize.

Bonky 75,728 15
02/08/2002 03:26 PM

If Melanie says something funny, I get to crack her knee caps!

Cap'n Stuby 17,826 13
02/08/2002 03:26 PM

THAT is a good idea.



You get 3 smiley clicks and 5 straight face clicks for that idea.

Dirk Lately 14,001 13
02/08/2002 03:30 PM

"I love Mike Ward!!! Mike Ward is the BEST! If you people knew what was good for you, you would love Mike Ward, too!"



Kenshin's fawning is going to sound odd now.

Scooter Brown 19,936 13
02/08/2002 03:31 PM

Goddamn, it's really depressing to see which posts are getting clicked.

Peon 6,076 13
02/08/2002 03:31 PM

Then I'd be the Jerry's Kid of GAB.

Merkin 10,008 13
02/08/2002 03:33 PM

*sings to Peon*



"You'll never walk aloooone..."

Nutbutter - Merchandise now Available! 181,255 35
02/08/2002 03:34 PM

I think we should only be allowed to see our own rankings jsut so we wont have to hear Scooter Brown say stuff like "Oh man, you got a clickie for THAT? That was so not funny!"

The Lady (Swamp Witch) Trixxie 65,021 15
02/08/2002 03:34 PM

Goodamminit, Nutbuster's got yellow showing, but that post was so damn funny I had to click it, (and unlike my favors, I am picky with my clickie) You see thats the thing, Vicar is consistently funny, Nutbuster isn't, but damn when he hits, He Hits Big

SheCabbage 5,200 13
02/08/2002 03:36 PM

Am I correct in guessing that it doesn't work if you're not logged in?

SheCabbage 5,200 13
02/08/2002 03:36 PM

Yes, I am correct. I brokey your rankies.

Scooter Brown 19,936 13
02/08/2002 03:39 PM

Some people get clicked no matter what they say. Most of what VBob says is funny, but Shakespeare, not everything. Nutbutter get's clicked for "*speechless*" in reply to CF's pooping thread. Fronzel seems to always get clicked and he never tells jokes, he just talks about windows and Shakespeare. Some of you could just post "hi" all day and get every one of them clicked. This is Frost-ing sickening.

SheCabbage 5,200 13
02/08/2002 03:40 PM

You're just jealous, Scooter.



Actually, I rarely ever click smilies. I just forget most of the time.



My clickes are with you in spirit.

Dirk Lately 14,001 13
02/08/2002 03:41 PM

*taunts Scooter with his clickie

Bonky 75,728 15
02/08/2002 03:41 PM

Well Hi!

Merkin 10,008 13
02/08/2002 03:41 PM

I agree with Scoot. The rankings system is very impressive, but the people doing the ranking aren't clicking for "funny."

Nutbutter - Merchandise now Available! 181,255 35
02/08/2002 03:41 PM

Oh quit whining and say something funny, Scooter.



If it makes you feel any better, you're in the top five of people I click "funny" for.

SheCabbage 5,200 13
02/08/2002 03:41 PM

Hi?

Dirk Lately 14,001 13
02/08/2002 03:43 PM

It's Bonky, so it must be funny.

The Lady (Voodo Mama) Trixxie 65,021 15
02/08/2002 03:44 PM

Huge Penis, Ragged out Emerson, Buttplug ????

Merkin 10,008 13
02/08/2002 03:44 PM

"Hi?"



Now come on, people. That's just silly.

SheCabbage 5,200 13
02/08/2002 03:44 PM

Who clicked a smiley for me saying "Hi?"



That was not funny! Not at all!

SheCabbage 5,200 13
02/08/2002 03:45 PM

See?!

Nutbutter - Merchandise now Available! 181,255 35
02/08/2002 03:45 PM

I did, Shecab, but only to piss Scooter off.

SheCabbage 5,200 13
02/08/2002 03:45 PM

Oh man. I'm funnier when I'm not trying to be funny.



I should start talking about cancer or something.

SheCabbage 5,200 13
02/08/2002 03:46 PM

Oh. :)



I always knew you cared, Nutty.

Superkitten with a Gameboy Advance™ in his butt 3,425 0
02/08/2002 03:46 PM

Poopies.

Bonky 75,728 15
02/08/2002 03:46 PM

So, Scooter looking for a pity click to go along with his pity Frost?

Scooter Brown 19,936 13
02/08/2002 03:47 PM

I'm ranked high, so I'm not sure how much water the jealousy argument holds. Makes me feel good. I'm the guy that nobody wants to click because you all hate me, but I still get a lot of clicks because I'm so goddamn funny you'd go to hell for your dishonesty if you didn't click me.

Bonky 75,728 15
02/08/2002 03:47 PM

I'm sorry. That was uncalled for. I just wanted to type the word Frost.

Nutbutter - Merchandise now Available! 181,255 35
02/08/2002 03:47 PM

SheCab, if you talk about Cancer my mouse will break from all the clickies.



Cancer is funny, you see.

SheCabbage 5,200 13
02/08/2002 03:48 PM

I'm ranked high, so I'm not sure how much water the jealousy argument holds.



Translation: Nyah-nyah-nyah-nyah-nyaaaah-nyaaaah



or



Translation: I obviously have a bigger penis than you, so I could hardly care what you think.

Nutbutter - Merchandise now Available! 181,255 35
02/08/2002 03:49 PM

Oh be nice, Shecab. Not everything said her is serious.



Could you tell me that story about your genetic thyroid disorder again?

Bonky 75,728 15
02/08/2002 03:49 PM

If your penis is bigger than mine, I don't clickie!

SheCabbage 5,200 13
02/08/2002 03:50 PM

Nope, I'm too busy stuffing cheesecake into my mouth with both handaksl

Scooter Brown 19,936 13
02/08/2002 03:50 PM

I did not get a single click for my "Math is Hard" ladies t-shirt. That's only the funniest thing ever on the internet.

SheCabbage 5,200 13
02/08/2002 03:50 PM

*checks to see if she left the radio on*

Cap'n Stuby 17,826 13
02/08/2002 03:52 PM

I never get clicks, but I don't care. I like to think it's because I make people so mad that their buttholes crinkle up really tight and they get mad at me for it.





Besides, you can always subtract funny.

Scooter Brown 19,936 13
02/08/2002 03:53 PM

Oh SheCab, for all you know you've got a foot-long down there.

Nutbutter - Merchandise now Available! 181,255 35
02/08/2002 03:53 PM

Are these new rankings retroactive? I mean, would Scooter's "math is Hard" post show up as funny if he said it before the new rankings went into effect?

The Dirty Vicar 17,446 13
02/08/2002 03:53 PM

I'm sensing that this board will soon erupt in violence. Sudden comedic violence.



Rival factions.



The poop jokes vs. the Tolstoy puns.



Sexual innuendo vs. Larry King's hair



Your mother is a... vs. My cucumber is taking up the piano





Ugliness.

shoelace414 10,080 13
02/08/2002 03:54 PM

you mother is a cucecumber taking up the piano!

SheCabbage 5,200 13
02/08/2002 03:55 PM

Poop jokes just never go out of style, just like acid-washed jeans.

Cap'n Stuby 17,826 13
02/08/2002 03:55 PM

Vicar could get clicks for posting blank space.



No fair!





So we in the GAB Bastard Brigade will have to make a concerted effort to click straight faced icons (hereby dubbed Maharishis) to keep the rankings stable.

Bonky 75,728 15
02/08/2002 03:56 PM

Oooh! La La! Bonjour!

SheCabbage 5,200 13
02/08/2002 03:56 PM

You got a smiley click for Maharishi.

Cap'n Stuby 17,826 13
02/08/2002 03:57 PM

And you got one for hating Maharishi

Nutbutter - Merchandise now Available! 181,255 35
02/08/2002 03:58 PM

Yeah, I clicked you too, Stub. Maharishis are the perfect name for an unfunny icon.

SheCabbage 5,200 13
02/08/2002 03:58 PM

Aww, it's gone already.



I hate you Scooter Brown.



My next poo I will dedicate to you.

John Hargrave 128,742 73
02/08/2002 03:59 PM

For the record: yes, rankings are retroactive.



Just remember, the amount of smiley clicks in a conversation is what will eventually determine your all-time top funniest conversations -- so if everyone is clicking straight-faces to drag it down, then you're wasting a perfectly funny conversation.

Dangeo 2,691 13
02/08/2002 03:59 PM

fOrst to pIst!

Dangeo 2,691 13
02/08/2002 04:00 PM

I'm not funny... but I like to laugh. So, I hang out here.

Cap'n Stuby 17,826 13
02/08/2002 04:00 PM

But killing our beautiful creations is what makes GAB such a special place, John!

Dirk Lately 14,001 13
02/08/2002 04:01 PM

I think the fact that Scooter is Maharishing everyone is funny.

SheCabbage 5,200 13
02/08/2002 04:03 PM

I can just see him there...



"Yeah? Take this."

*click*

"Nngh...oh yeah, call me a turd, will you?"

*click*

"Nnnngh!"

Nutbutter - Merchandise now Available! 181,255 35
02/08/2002 04:03 PM

I think the fact that we already have a term for "unfunny" kicks ass.



Stub, just for that you are in the Cool Kids Club.

Cap'n Stuby 17,826 13
02/08/2002 04:04 PM

ooh, two hours into GAB 3.4 and we've got a new noun AND a new verb!





Who say the Interweb ain't be good for nuttin'?

Scooter Brown 19,936 13
02/08/2002 04:04 PM

Scab are you aware that deepest pits of hell are reserved for grotesquely obese Carrolls? Repent!

Cap'n Stuby 17,826 13
02/08/2002 04:04 PM

yay!



Success at the expense of another!







I'm living the AMERICAN DREAM!

The Dirty Vicar 17,446 13
02/08/2002 04:04 PM

[blink spice]

SheCabbage 5,200 13
02/08/2002 04:05 PM

Stuby, that was actually funny, but I disliked you for some reason long ago that I've since forgotten so just forget about getting a funny click from me.

Bonky 75,728 15
02/08/2002 04:05 PM

SheCab, were it possible, I'd click you seven times for that one!

SheCabbage 5,200 13
02/08/2002 04:05 PM

What a shame I won't be able to meet up with you there, Scoot.

Stroganoff the Dragon 87 11
02/08/2002 04:06 PM

These rankings are dragging me and my diamond poops down.

SheCabbage 5,200 13
02/08/2002 04:06 PM

Thank you Bonky, it's the thought that counts.



*flutters eyelashes*

Scooter Brown 19,936 13
02/08/2002 04:06 PM

Tempting as it may be, I'm not going to maharish anybody. These negative rankings are a bad idea.

Bonky 75,728 15
02/08/2002 04:07 PM

(I was referring to the 3:03PM post. )



[Thank you]



<That is all>





{Dismissed}

SheCabbage 5,200 13
02/08/2002 04:07 PM

3:03, that was a good moment.



I hope I wasn't too graphic.

Cap'n Stuby 17,826 13
02/08/2002 04:08 PM

I forgot why you hate me, too.



My database with my hate/love list was lost when I inserted my penis into my computer's 5 1/4 drive in a fit of drunken rutting.





I'll just have to put Maha, erykah_badu and Onion at the top and make another one, I suppose.

SheCabbage 5,200 13
02/08/2002 04:08 PM

Well, if you hate Onion, I'm just going to have to hate you.



Hate is such an ugly thing.

Cap'n Stuby 17,826 13
02/08/2002 04:09 PM

Yes, and Hate's child is even uglier.





I think it's the postman's baby.

SheCabbage 5,200 13
02/08/2002 04:10 PM

Shakespeare, I clicked you in a fit of delerium.

Nutbutter - Merchandise now Available! 181,255 35
02/08/2002 04:10 PM

I think you should only be able to click the MAharishi once for every ten smiley's of yours other people have clicked.



That way, the unfunny jealous idiots can't go around clicking everyone's unsmiley and those of us with a clear idea of what is and isn't funny, noted by the amount of smily's we have, can attempt to rid the world of unfunny behavior.



I'm not only funny, I'm also humble.

The Dirty Vicar 17,446 13
02/08/2002 04:10 PM

John just changed the rating system to get a 100 post thread. Bastard.

Merkin 10,008 13
02/08/2002 04:10 PM

"Hate is such an ugly thing."



So is falsely boosting someone's ranking by clicking on inconsequential posts.

SheCabbage 5,200 13
02/08/2002 04:11 PM

Eh, who cares, Nutty?



You're no less a woman just because you don't have breasts.

SheCabbage 5,200 13
02/08/2002 04:11 PM

Merkin, what are you getting all over MY case for? I can't click on myself.

Scooter Brown 19,936 13
02/08/2002 04:11 PM

not as humble as me

Merkin 10,008 13
02/08/2002 04:12 PM

"That way, the unfunny jealous idiots can't go around clicking everyone's unsmiley and those of us with a clear idea of what is and isn't funny, noted by the amount of smily's we have, can attempt to rid the world of unfunny behavior."



I think this new ranking system has shown pretty clearly that GABers aren't clicking people's posts for pure "funny."

Merkin 10,008 13
02/08/2002 04:13 PM

Sorry, SheCab. I wasn't directing that solely on you. I know we can't click ourselves.



We'd go blind.

Cap'n Stuby 17,826 13
02/08/2002 04:13 PM

But Ms. Cabbage...I'm sure if you tried, you could click yourself. It takes a little while to "warm up the oven," so to speak, but the rewards are so great, it's worth it.





Just let me grab a camera and you can start cliking away...

SheCabbage 5,200 13
02/08/2002 04:13 PM

Merkin, you're new here aren't you?



I'm amazed that you seem so flabbergasted at the injustice of GAB.



Me, I gave up getting upset about that a long time ago.



Well, sometimes.

SheCabbage 5,200 13
02/08/2002 04:14 PM

Stub? That was just...well...disturbing.

Some Guy 19,242 12
02/08/2002 04:14 PM

I'm pretty stingy with my clicks. Surprisingly enough, if you ran a statistical analysis, Nutbutter would probably have the majority of my clicks. Not because I like him. He makes me laugh.



I'm also more likely to give clickies to someone I don't necessarily like who makes me laugh versus someone I really like, because they're going to have to push harder to get a click.



That's weird.

Nutbutter - Merchandise now Available! 181,255 35
02/08/2002 04:14 PM

Give it a few days for the novelty to wear off, Merkin, and things will settle down.



Also, what's funny to one person may not seem funny to another.

Dirk Lately 14,001 13
02/08/2002 04:14 PM

SheCab, I'm shocked that you're amazed that Merkin is flabbergasted.

SheCabbage 5,200 13
02/08/2002 04:15 PM

uh...



okay.



(Nutty, he wants you.)

Dangeo 2,691 13
02/08/2002 04:15 PM

Injustice of GAB.



That's funny.

Merkin 10,008 13
02/08/2002 04:15 PM

"Merkin, you're new here aren't you?"



Compared to the top 50, yes. But I've been here for about a year now.



And this doesn't surprise me, really. It's just a lot more clearly evidenced.

Nutbutter - Merchandise now Available! 181,255 35
02/08/2002 04:15 PM

Yeah, I'm stingy as well with my clicks. If I laugh out loud I'll usually click you.

SheCabbage 5,200 13
02/08/2002 04:15 PM

I'm not amazed like "OH MY GOD!" - I think it was more a word I pulled out of the air while I was typing.



Perhaps "amused" would have been a better choice.

sparky malarkey 2,144 12
02/08/2002 04:16 PM

I'd just like to point out that you just can't say flabbergast enough. Flabbergast!

Dirk Lately 14,001 13
02/08/2002 04:16 PM

Right. And by "shocked", I meant, of course, "aroused".

SheCabbage 5,200 13
02/08/2002 04:17 PM

Stop it!



STOP!



You're going to go and make me all serious and start explaining myself and then I'll get all uptight and annoyed and tense...



Nutty, help me out here.

The Dirty Vicar 17,446 13
02/08/2002 04:17 PM

I guess this means I'll have to start breaking out my B material.

Cap'n Stuby 17,826 13
02/08/2002 04:17 PM

Bragging about the length of time you've "been here" is quite similar to bragging "I've been cornholing the Murphy's rottweiler for almost 2 years now!"





With that being said, I've been cornholing GAB for 3+ years and I've yet to find someone as funny as Boner or PeePee, who shall be receiving the lion's share of my clicks.

SheCabbage 5,200 13
02/08/2002 04:21 PM

I think the new ranking thingie is making people LESS funny because they're trying so hard.

Scooter Brown 19,936 13
02/08/2002 04:21 PM

A way to search for the "best of" certain people's posts would be nice.

Some Guy 19,242 12
02/08/2002 04:24 PM

What's the difference between "funniest contributors" and "All time funniest contributors"?

Nutbutter - Merchandise now Available! 181,255 35
02/08/2002 04:25 PM

Ask her how fat she is.



Go on, I dare ya.

Some Guy 19,242 12
02/08/2002 04:25 PM

Nevermind. I figured it out. "Top Contributors" is just quantity of posts, where "All Time Funniest" are based upon funniness.



Leave me to my crack-pipe now.

Nutbutter - Merchandise now Available! 181,255 35
02/08/2002 04:26 PM

Oh yeah, and thanks to John and the New Guy for always improving this place.



Even if all we do is whine when new things are added.

Scooter Brown 19,936 13
02/08/2002 04:26 PM

"top contributers" means volume of posting. aka, quality judged Squeamish style. "all time funniest" would be quality judged vicar/v-bob style.

SheCabbage 5,200 13
02/08/2002 04:27 PM

I am very very fat.



I do not walk, I contract my folds like a giant slug and inch across the floor.

Scooter Brown 19,936 13
02/08/2002 04:30 PM

but you just try and keep up with her climbing that mountain!



*cue Michael Bolton impersonator singing something inspirational*

SheCabbage 5,200 13
02/08/2002 04:31 PM

You should. When I get momentum, watch out.

SheCabbage 5,200 13
02/08/2002 04:32 PM

Ooooooo look !



Scooter made another fat joke!



So original!



So pithy!



Scooter, we are not worthy!



*tries to bow down, but can't bend at the waist*

Scooter Brown 19,936 13
02/08/2002 04:34 PM

actually, I didn't make another fat joke.

SheCabbage 5,200 13
02/08/2002 04:34 PM

Whoo! Keep em coming, Scooter!



You're on a roll!



Get it?



Ha!

Scooter Brown 19,936 13
02/08/2002 04:37 PM

seriously... I don't say anything about you being fat in that post.... The joke was not about you being fat... It was about something else... hello?

SheCabbage 5,200 13
02/08/2002 04:37 PM

Was it now?



I'm afraid you'll have to explain it to me, because your joke



SUCKED ASS

The Lady (Voodo Mama) Trixxie 65,021 15
02/08/2002 04:38 PM

My clickie meater show yellow "Woo Who" *wets self*

The Lady (Voodo Mama) Trixxie 65,021 15
02/08/2002 04:48 PM

John, I know agree with your previous decision that negative clickies are a bad idea. Any self loathing nerd with a computer and way to much free time, (You can only masturbate so many times till it's too sore to touch), is going to totally skew any validity the results of this system could ever have.

Gonzo got a new job 20,522 17
02/08/2002 04:51 PM

Dammit! I leave you kids alone for a few hours, and you change the whole damn place around!



and...



fdisk

Brown Noser 84 12
02/08/2002 05:46 PM

I like it, John. And I'm not just being a brown-noser!

Cap'n Stuby 17,826 13
02/08/2002 05:48 PM

Trixxie's last post had only ONE typo.





WHO ARE YOU AND WHAT DID YOU DO WITH THE REAL TRIXXIE!?

SheCabbage 5,200 13
02/08/2002 05:49 PM

Perhaps Trixxie took her time with that one.

The Dirty Vicar 17,446 13
02/08/2002 05:51 PM

Ass kisser.

The Dirty Vicar 17,446 13
02/08/2002 05:52 PM

Wow, that one missed the mark bad. Sorry everyone who, during the 18 minutes it took me to reply, stepped in the way of my lame joke.

+18Chickens 286,208 61
02/08/2002 06:21 PM

I'm not gonna read this entire thread on Friday, after spending two days trying to get my new computer up and running.



(so long Windows NT, hello Win 2k!!!)





All I know is that for some reason, I lost my tool and moved up in rank.



Oh well.



Yall have a weekend. I'll check this Shakespeare out on monday. Don't delete the thread, and for god's sake stop posting to it. It will take me hours as is.



Frosters

1bigdork 7,825 12
02/08/2002 06:23 PM

I like the concept, but visually it is a bit distracting.

The Dirty Vicar 17,446 13
02/08/2002 06:28 PM

About the only thing that seems a bit screwy is when someone negates a funny click.



Say I click Mr. Dork's post, because I thought it was funny.



Then someone else comes along, sees that someone thinks it's funny, disagrees, and "de-clicks" it.



Thus my vote and the second vote cancelled each other out. The problem I'm seeing is that the second vote wins. I voted it as funny, then it was voted as being unfunny. Net result, the post is unfunny.



Ah, to hell with it.

Mr. Fuck 11,939 13
02/08/2002 06:30 PM

man john that was way too much for me to read/understand i'm bizzaked as fizzuck



john my nigga

Some Guy 19,242 12
02/08/2002 06:36 PM

(You can only masturbate so many times till it's too sore to touch)



heheheh.. that kills me





Why not just have a negative button that accumulates too?

Squeamish 38,986 14
02/08/2002 06:38 PM

>i'm bizzaked as fizzuck



Glad to see your "no pot so I can get a job" plan lasted almost 24 hours.

LeVertGecko 0 0
02/08/2002 06:38 PM

No matter what you do John, people will cheat or try on purpose to Frost it up.



having said that I will now click straight face on every post of the top 50 posters....GO!

1bigdork 7,825 12
02/08/2002 06:45 PM

I like the new system. I am ranked 55 in quantity and 18 in quality.



Mrs. Dork tells me that quality is much more important than quantity. This must be why I shoot bucketloads during our annual coitus.







Although I'm pretty sure that there are at least 20 people on GAB who are funnier than me.

Mr. Fuck 11,939 13
02/08/2002 06:45 PM

chaCHING

1bigdork 7,825 12
02/08/2002 06:48 PM

I'm not so sure that Mr. Grim Otto will work. Are there many posts where one person sez HAW! and another sez HMMPF! enought to mark it down?



As much as you like things to be positive, John, it might be fun to try out the * (Emerson) icon.

Ford Prefect 5,475 13
02/08/2002 07:18 PM

I'm noticing that the posts that get the most clicks of all, are the the kind that I usually imagine a cheesy laugh-track when I read them. I'm feeling disillusioned

LeVertGecko 0 0
02/08/2002 07:28 PM

Welcome to gab. its like a sitcom in hell.

1bigdork 7,825 12
02/08/2002 07:32 PM

Now I'm sure that it won't work. It is too easy for a person with a grudge to systematically cancel out the positive feedback of others.



Bad Karma without consequences ... you have opened up Pandora's Box.

aushie 5,580 13
02/08/2002 08:58 PM

I've been doing some experimenting, and I think you can only click three times on any particular post.



In fact, I think that was the case before this rankings system too.



So if I find Scooter to be funny, I can click him three times. But if someone else finds him not quite as funny, they can click him down three times, taking him back to zero.



After that, I can't take him back up. But someone else who finds him funny can. And the person who cancelled my three clicks can't click downward anymore. And neither can I.

d8uv the h8ted 3,011 13
02/08/2002 08:59 PM

The negatives have to go. If it is not funny, I don't click the smiley.



Also, it would be nice to see what your funniest post is.

Of course, being me, I'll be a tie between all of my posts.

aushie 5,580 13
02/08/2002 09:01 PM

Of course, the scenario I just stated above doesn't stop anyone from logging in as a different person and clicking people up or down, which would be very easy for a grudge-clicker.

Lindsey 988 13
02/08/2002 09:02 PM

I find myself clicking everyone else's smileys a lot more now, to make up for that sad expanse of white.

aushie 5,580 13
02/08/2002 09:05 PM

I'm talking Shakespeare. It's once, not three times.

Chouggy, Thumb Boy 5,183 13
02/08/2002 09:51 PM

One thing I have noticed in my quick review of old threads, is that blantant requests for smilie clicks work. Many people get clicks for asking.



That's my new strategy.



*notes that this post will be the first negative reading just to prove me a point. Frosters*

20,522 17
02/08/2002 10:38 PM

You've done your part well, Mr. Hargraeve. Now, whenever a "quitting" smoker sees a 1/4 full "funny line", it will resemble a cigarette, causing insataible subliminable cravings.

postbear 10,158 13
02/09/2002 11:11 AM

i was wondering what this new setup was all about.



i, too, would prefer smiley and Emerson rankings, rather than a cancellation system.



but it's not my board, so i don't care.

Scooter Brown 19,936 13
02/09/2002 08:20 PM

If I wanted to, and I'm not saying I don't, I could do a search for Squeamish and take three clicks away from every post he has ever made.

Scooter Brown 19,936 13
02/09/2002 08:21 PM

I would do it to Scab, but I'd have to look through a lot of damn threads just to find the 2 threads she got clicked in.

Alienyst 2,371 12
02/09/2002 09:52 PM

since the rankings have been up for a day or two now, I must say some of the suggestions here seem like far better ideas. It definitely needs more than one ranking. This smiley thing just does not cut it.

The Lady Trixxie 65,021 15
02/09/2002 10:58 PM

Well, Cap, funny you should note; I have always had an editor my entire profesional carrier. Now I am going from a GS 17 to a GS 18, but, in CRD different Division same office; same floor, different planet, there are GS 23s going up for general application to all of (OCRM), Office of Coastal Restoration and Management, that's 62K a year (Southern {Confederate}Dollars), almost twice what I make - but, I "hear" you may have to practically wright an (EIS), Environmental Impact Statement, as well as, manage contracts - like about 5 Thesises and 1 and 1/2 dissertations, should I apply???

32 11
02/10/2002 07:18 PM

You guys are a bunch of twats.

postbear 10,158 13
02/10/2002 07:25 PM

mmmmmm... twat....

vertical bob 26,707 13
02/10/2002 07:26 PM

By the bunch or by the bushel, new from Nabisco.

Captain Chickies 286,208 61
09/06/2002 01:03 PM

Where do you go to find out how many total posts you've made?

Squeamish 38,986 14
09/06/2002 01:07 PM

You have to ask here.

Frogtacular 173,148 25
02/25/2004 06:29 AM

"It's a moment. A defining moment when you know that your favorite television has reached it's peak. The instant that you know that from now on...it's all down hill. Some call it the climax. We call it jumping the shark." -Jumptehshark.com



so this was Zug at its best? Are you sure you don't mean this was the day when Zug went to Arnold's for fries and a rootbeer after Fonzie landed the shark jump, and Ralph Mouth told Potsie to sit on it? Just asking is all..

Frou Frou 156,785 17
02/25/2004 08:18 AM

No, it's not the day Zug jumped the shark. It's the day people got petty and decided that the "funny" was interferring with their cliques.



Everyone seems to be an authority on what is funny and what is not based on their own interpretations, which some believe is the word of God.



Let this subject die a peaceful death now will ya?

Fake Colorful Easter Basket Straw 97,737 37
04/06/2007 09:12 PM

So there was some sort of system in place before the pee tubes? What was it?

dinesh 24,862 16
04/06/2007 09:15 PM

there were three sets of rankings: funny, useful, and interesting. each had an icon you could click next to a post. it just counted the number of clicks on each.

no one used anything but funny, so the other two got Shakespearecanned, and funny got turned into a peetube.

Fake Colorful Easter Basket Straw 97,737 37
04/06/2007 09:22 PM

Interesting.

MAX POWERS 68,758 11
04/06/2007 09:29 PM

Oh how I miss the peetube.

Fratberry 282,300 53
04/06/2007 09:30 PM

I've noticed.

MAX POWERS 68,758 11
04/06/2007 09:50 PM

You would.

Jolson whips it good! 16,163 11
04/06/2007 09:55 PM

<action>strolls into the thread with a plastic tarp.</action>Did somebody say watersports?