Daddy, you're hurting Mommy!
A comedy conversation
by Chouggy, Thumb Boy 5,183 13 02/14/2002 11:52 AM 381 views
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So last night when I'm putting my 4 year old to bed, we started talking about what he would do when he grows up. He says that he would be married and have 3 kids, then named them.
So I asked,
"How are you gonna get 3 kids."
"I'm gonna have sex."
"What! What do you know about sex?!"
"I've watched you and Mommy have sex."
"HUH! What are we doing?!"
"You lay on Mommy and she makes lots of noises."
My poor son is now scarred for life.
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Like This? Rate It!
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Side-splitting
14 votes
5.0
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Chuckleworthy
7 votes
2.0
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Nutbutter - Merchandise now Available! 181,255 35
02/14/2002 11:53 AM
You are obviously a horrible father. Kids should grow up thinking sex is dirty and wrong and not something a loving couple should be doing.
Somebody call DSS.
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Hilarious
9 votes
4.0
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Merkin 10,008 13
02/14/2002 11:54 AM
"Just like when the mailman comes by!"
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Hilarious
15 votes
4.5
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postbear 10,158 13
02/14/2002 12:28 PM
of course mommy makes lots of noises. she's having her pelvis crushed by gargantua.
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0 votes
0.0
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Chouggy, Thumb Boy 5,183 13
02/14/2002 12:37 PM
Isn't it gargantuan?
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Hilarious
10 votes
4.5
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Dead Robot 67,630 16
02/14/2002 12:41 PM
Isn't it gargantuan?
Soon I will have found some girl that I adore.
Isn't it gargantuan?
While I sit around my love can scrub the floor.
She'll kiss me every hour or she'll get the sack
and when I take a shower she can scrub my back.
Isn't it gargantuan?
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Chuckleworthy
5 votes
2.0
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1bigdork 7,825 12
02/14/2002 01:07 PM
You lay on Mommy and she makes lots of noises.
How can she be heard when you are laying on her?
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4 votes
0.0
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Vlad the Impaler 19,599 12
02/14/2002 02:30 PM
Mwahahahaha *ouch*
ARGH!!!
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4 votes
0.0
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Dangeo 2,691 13
02/14/2002 02:38 PM
You should have asked what kind of noises mommy makes.
It would have been funny to get the youngster to recite a verse or two of "Mommy having sex with Daddy".
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4 votes
0.0
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Chouggy, Thumb Boy 5,183 13
02/14/2002 02:40 PM
Hey, at least she makes noises.
Unlike my mother.
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Chuckleworthy
5 votes
2.0
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vertical bob 26,707 13
02/14/2002 02:43 PM
Ow! Ugh! Crap! Get offa me! Froster!
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Chuckleworthy
3 votes
2.0
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Spool Pigeon 2,859 12
02/14/2002 02:45 PM
"Are you in yet?"
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Chuckleworthy
3 votes
2.0
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Adrian Von Buttcrack 13,341 13
02/14/2002 02:50 PM
"This ceeling needs to be repainted"
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Chuckleworthy
5 votes
2.0
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Callie Mollari 14,455 13
02/14/2002 02:51 PM
"What the hell are you doing with that thumb!!?"
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Hilarious
6 votes
4.0
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1bigdork 7,825 12
02/14/2002 02:53 PM
"Gimmie 50 bucks"
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Chuckleworthy
3 votes
2.0
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+18Chickens 286,208 61
02/14/2002 02:55 PM
"Hey! You're not 20Chickens!"
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Hilarious
6 votes
4.0
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Ford Prefect 5,475 13
02/14/2002 02:55 PM
At least he didn't see you give Mommy a pearl necklace or something.
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Chuckleworthy
5 votes
2.0
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Adrian Von Buttcrack 13,341 13
02/14/2002 02:56 PM
Or better still, pulling a perlnecklace out of her ass.
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4 votes
0.0
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Chouggy, Thumb Boy 5,183 13
02/14/2002 02:57 PM
That was my worry too. Thank God we had put away the Frostswing.
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Hilarious
6 votes
4.0
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LeVertGecko 0 0
02/14/2002 02:58 PM
and what did mommy say?
"if you stick it in my ass again I am gonna punch you in the balls tubby."
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0 votes
0.0
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SheCabbage 5,200 13
02/14/2002 03:00 PM
Gargantula
do dooo da doodoo
Gargantula
do doodoo do
Gargantula
do dooo da doodoo
da doodoo
da doodoo
da doodoodoodoo
doot doot doo doo do
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0 votes
0.0
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Don Spudleone 323 13
02/14/2002 03:19 PM
Gamera can kick Gargantula's ass any day of the week.
All children love Gamera!
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1 votes
0.0
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Chouggy, Thumb Boy 5,183 13
02/14/2002 05:06 PM
Gameran Diaz? She's hot!
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Hilarious
10 votes
4.5
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Feeble, Master of Spline Curves 32,400 15
02/14/2002 05:14 PM
This, of course, needs to be commemorated with a joke.
A guy is having sex with his wife and the four year old walks in. Before the flustered man can say anything, the kid say "Oh Boy! Pony Rides!"
Thinking this is a good way to avoid explaining the facts of life for another few years, the man lets the kid crawl onto his back, and away he goes.
What with the added weight right on the pelvis, the wife pretty soon is getting really excited. The kid grabs hold of Dad's hair and says "Watch out, Dad, this is where the pool boy gets thrown off".
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Chuckleworthy
3 votes
2.0
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Reek Stankleberry 3,653 12
02/14/2002 05:33 PM
So this guy and girl are having sex really hard and then the girl is like, "Did you put it in my vagina yet?"
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