My only 'severe' prank...
A comedy article
by Alienyst  2,371  12
03/31/2002 05:53 PM 313 views
|
|
I was in the Navy in the early 80's. Although I was assigned a ship after school (Advanced Electronic Engineering/3-D Radar Development Technology)the ship was in dry dock for the next 15 months for a complete overhaul.
This suited me fine, my first daughter had just been born and I was planning not to re-enlist and would be discharged before the ship ever left port again. This is where the problem began.
There was a petty officer that couldn't stand the fact that I would never be at sea on the ship and I had all these privaleges while in port (it happened to be MY homeport but 1500 miles away from HIS homeport, hence I had more off-ship privaleges than he did although he was senior to me).
Anyway, he would make it as hard as he could for me by assigning me all these clean-up details (since the ship was at port, there was no call for expertise - weapons systems hab been removed for technology upgrades). One of the nastiest clean ups was obviously the kitchen and the mess hall. Since it was in port, they tended to leave it for the 'assigns'.
Working 'the mess' as it was called gave me another advantage he never anticipated. I had access to food stores and lockers that I otherwise would not have. I found in one of my explorations cans of pie filling - big cans. There was strawberry, blueberry, apple, all kinds of fruit. But only one interested me. The blueberry.
I saved that can, and it was a big one, hidden until my discharge was final and I could check off ship. The night before we all got drunk at a party (including petty officer Emerson) only some of us has conspired to not drink as much as it appeared and to also spike petty officer Emersons beers with liquor. He was wicked drunk.
It was April 3 actually, I just could not get it moved up any faster. But it was close enough for me. When petty officer Emerson passed out in his bunk, we made sure he was covered - face and all - with the blue berry juice.
As I checked off the ship the next morning for the last time I will never forget the sound of his voice, screaming "Don't let him off the ship - don't let him go!" being drowned out by the laughter of at least 200 navy officers, wives, families, petty officers, etc. as he stood there blue as a smurf!
True story - USS Barney (bucket 'o bolts) Guided Missle Cruiser, DDG-6, April 3, 1982, Norfolk Shipyards, Norfolk, VA
|
|
|
Like This? Rate It!
|
|
Hilarious
17 votes
4.9
/live?func=new_user&msgid=436251
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
9 Comments on "My only 'severe' prank..."
|
|
|
Chuckleworthy
0 votes
2.0
/live?func=new_user&msgid=437088
Cap'n Stuby 17,826  13
04/01/2002 10:45 AM
I was living at Langley during that time.
I swore I heard laughter coming from the shipyard...
Major clickies for you, man. You deserved the T-shirt for that.
|
| |
|
|
|
0 votes
0.0
/live?func=new_user&msgid=437244
Alienyst 2,371 12
04/01/2002 01:26 PM
thx...
|
| |
|
|
|
Chuckleworthy
0 votes
2.0
/live?func=new_user&msgid=437545
Adrian Von Buttcrack 13,341 13
04/01/2002 04:08 PM
See? Army and Navy equipment makes for the best pranks.
|
| |
|
|
|
Hilarious
0 votes
4.0
/live?func=new_user&msgid=437994
Wako, succubus training dummy 12,056 12
04/01/2002 09:25 PM
In the air defense unit i originally joined to we used to always have the cherries searching all over for a can of squelch (like static). Granted, it's an old prank, but we made it good. We'd send them to supply, they'd pass them on to the orderly room, to motorpool, who'd tell them they just sent their last to s3, who'd then make them fill out a request, and while they were waiting, make them go find a box of grid squares.
(maps are gridded into squares. a single grid square makes no sense). this sometimes would go on all day.
|
| |
|
|
|
Chuckleworthy
0 votes
2.0
/live?func=new_user&msgid=439520
Adrian Von Buttcrack 13,341 13
04/02/2002 09:52 PM
heh, I was in air defense, too.
|
| |
|
|
|
0 votes
0.0
/live?func=new_user&msgid=449599
Alienyst 2,371 12
04/11/2002 09:24 AM
wow - sooo close to a fuul pee tube...I never had one of those before...
|
| |
|
|
|
0 votes
0.0
/live?func=new_user&msgid=449600
Alienyst 2,371 12
04/11/2002 09:24 AM
umm...full even
|
| |
|
|
|
Chuckleworthy
0 votes
2.0
/live?func=new_user&msgid=451962
socks, not sox 4,060 0
04/12/2002 05:40 PM
someone who dyes a man blue deserves the full piss tube.
|
| |
|
|
|
0 votes
0.0
/live?func=new_user&msgid=453163
Alienyst 2,371 12
04/14/2002 03:35 AM
thx socks!
|
|
|
|
Store