Only 96% as Feeble 32,400 15
04/17/2002 10:57 PM

I've got your lancet right here!

audy 118 11
04/17/2002 11:00 PM

GIVE IT TO ME!!!!!!!!!

Sexhead, Grand Mistress Succubus 12,287 12
04/17/2002 11:06 PM

Dieting does suck major ass.



I lost ten pounds without even trying. I was so excited, I decided that I would lose more, so I started trying. I lost maybe another five, and now I can't budge.



Grrr!



Water weight especially sucks....

Fronzel Neekburm 15,959 13
04/17/2002 11:08 PM

You lost 10 pounds and put on 5? Wouldn't that mean you only lost 5 pounds?

Cap'n Stuby 17,826 13
04/17/2002 11:13 PM

Uh...that's like when women go shopping and say "Omigawd..I spent $400, but I saved over $300 because everything was on sale!"

Micro³ 13,428 12
04/17/2002 11:32 PM

I dont have to diet cause I cant budge from my dead sexy weight of 250.





DEAD SEXY

Only 96% as Feeble 32,400 15
04/17/2002 11:34 PM

Cube is a necrophiliac!

Wako, workin hard, hardly workin 12,056 12
04/17/2002 11:35 PM

yeah, weight control sucks. i miss working out for more than two weeks and i drop back down to 142!

will i never get my weight back to my verile 155?



oh, you're trying to lose weight...

Fronzel Neekburm 15,959 13
04/17/2002 11:39 PM

I'm at about 230. I could stand to lose a few.



I've got this revolutionart diet plan. It is the Eat less, Move more plan.



Or I could just admit that nobody wants me and my excercise level at the "Compulsive Masturbator" level.

Stinky 7,952 12
04/17/2002 11:39 PM

The problem is, no matter how much you all weigh, you'll still look like down-syndrome monkeys. So eat up!

1bigdork 7,825 12
04/17/2002 11:40 PM

*kicks sand in Wako's face

Squeamish 38,986 14
04/17/2002 11:41 PM

I'm tipping the scales at 135.

Sexhead, Grand Mistress Succubus 12,287 12
04/17/2002 11:42 PM

Thanks for putting it all into perspective, Stinky.

1bigdork 7,825 12
04/17/2002 11:44 PM

KILOS!

Jay Cornelius 411 13
04/18/2002 08:45 AM

Squeam, you have to put your other foot on the scale too.



I myself have had tremendous trouble dieting. I have delayed my physical exam with my physician for like 3 years now because I know he is just gonna chastize me about my weight.



A lot of co-workers show me their portion-controlled meals but those look too tiny. I find myself like Steve Martin in LA Story looking at a micro-sized crawfish on the "lobster platter" and saying, "Funny, I'm finished with the meal and I don't remember eating."

Bonky 75,728 15
04/18/2002 08:49 AM

Major Ass was so angered by the comments of Corporal Butt and Private Penis, he went and told Captain Vaginaboob and they were all tossed into a pit of lesbian alligators.

+15Chickens, organ donor 286,208 61
04/18/2002 11:32 AM

You guys are on the wrong type of diet. I'm slowly losing what I was hopeing to loose. Yeah, only 5 pounds since January, but I'm eating all I want, am never hungry, and it's basically just the right foods.



Read The MacDougal Diet. It's pretty much a vegan diet but with the emphasis on health instead of tree hugging.



And I give myself permission to have a steak every once in a while. I feel stuffed like a pig afterwards, but I do make the occasional break.

audy 118 11
04/18/2002 05:54 PM

What I meant was that I first lost 10 lbs, then gained 5. So yeah, in total I only lost 5. Actually, I lost 2 lbs today. 7 then.



I know a way of making everyone feel better!!! You can all take turnShakespeare-ing me w/ a 2x4 (or Calista Flockhart, it's all the same crap. Skinny little bitch...)

Pants 14,252 17
04/18/2002 06:08 PM

I know none of you just woke up one morning and said " Holy Sheet What happened here? I'm a damn beanbag chair."

Go outside and play.

Bonky 75,728 15
04/18/2002 07:08 PM

I was a Bean Bag Chair once for Halloween.





My sister had to be a Hobo! Hhahaha hahaahahah ! Fat melon head hobo!

audy 118 11
04/18/2002 10:53 PM

I read this on eonline:



Not that Ms. F. wasn't already used to the stabs. Just this weekend at the GLAAD (Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation) Media Awards here in Hollywood, emcee Garry Marshall blurted, virtually out of nowhere, "Did you hear about Calista Flockhart's accident? Don't worry--she's all right; she's been faxed to the hospital!" The audience, including my seatmate Shirley MacLaine, guffawed in approval.

Declan McManus 131,867 36
04/18/2002 11:01 PM

And that dammed show has finally been cancelled!

+15Chickens, organ donor 286,208 61
04/19/2002 10:06 AM

I can't believe the GLAAD crowd made fun of her after that groudbreaking kiss in year one. Doesn't that kind of think make you forever an insider?

+15Chickens, organ donor 286,208 61
04/19/2002 10:14 AM

This kiss.

Viscous 595 12
04/19/2002 10:24 AM

Poor Calista. Her sad, bony ass takes more flak than Roseanne Barr and Rosie O'Donnel put together. And the poor wench starves herself for that look, too.



Congrats on the 7 lbs down, Audy. That's awesome!

audy 118 11
04/19/2002 05:14 PM

Thank you, thank you. Let's see if it stuck...



*goes to scale* yep. Sleep is good.

Barking Pumpkin 19,242 12
04/19/2002 05:17 PM

Dieting is not healthy. You should always eat sensibly, using the food pyramid as a guide.



That said, I eat nothing but Beef Burritos from Taco John's.



My poo is always runny.