Arthur Gonzerelli 20,522 17
07/08/2002 12:29 PM

This reminds me of the time we wandered into the physics lab, and all of the variable electrical transformers were laid out on the lab tables.



I had just bought a little container full of leads for my mechanical pencil. It only took me about three minutes to clamp the alligator clips of each transformer to a lead, set them to AC, and crank them to 75 volts, 1.2 amps.



It was hillarious as people filed into the lab, and almost all at once, turned on their transformers. I don't know if I've ever seen a Nun with soiled underwear, but if I have, it was immediately after the machine-gun-like explosions that went off then.

Wako (and Yakko and Dot) 12,056 12
07/08/2002 01:41 PM

we used to really screw with the teachers we liked. We stole an english teachers couch he had in the class, and ransomed it back, one piece at a time.



My physics teacher was the best. We flipped his desk upside down and put the drawers back in (the fit either way), then replaced everything on it exactly as it was, except on the bottom of the desk. We also filled his class with balls from a macdonalds play area.

Chouggy, Thumb Boy 5,183 13
07/08/2002 01:50 PM

My cousin once stole his English teacher's, who happened from Wales, picture of the Queen. The teacher had earlier in the day given him detention for screwin' around. My cousin snuck into class after school and swiped it off the wall.



My cousin comes up to my place and says he needs to leave something here. I'm like, " The fvckin' Queen of England!!" I put it in the basement. The teacher went crazy, screaming and threatening, but no one saw him do it, so no proof.



We moved out of that house 6 years later and I found the picture. My cousin took it, walked back in class and then hung it up.

Mr. Slappy 6 9
10/02/2003 02:44 AM

I once had a history teacher that was addicted to diet coke and he had a fridge in the classroom for it. One day we took all the coke out and replaced it with regular coke, pepsi and diet pepsi. He was freaking out, probably going through a widthdrawl since he drank like 4-5 a day. Plus he took naps on the couch in the room during lunch.

Hammerhead, Now In Feelaround! 59,399 14
10/02/2003 03:04 AM

We had a couple of great breakdowns my junior and senior years of high school. The first was the chem teacher, who was also a assistant football coach. In the middle of the first semester, he had a mid life crisis. I didn't have him as a teacher, but I heard stories that he wasn't teaching, that he was making the students do some type of skits, and videotaping them (not porn you pervs). It came to a head, when he took a group to Indianapolis on some field trip. They went to the scheduled event, afterwords, he rented a hotel room, put all the students in there, locked them in, and left them there for a couple of hours before they returned to school, going who knows where. He left before the end of the year, on "medical leave." Rumors about his personal life were that he was getting a divorce, and that was a part of it...

Hammerhead, Now In Feelaround! 59,399 14
10/02/2003 03:15 AM

The second was part of a senior prank. Our school librarian was a freak. She had this moose head in the library (rumor was that she'd hit the thing with her car, felt bad about it, and had it stuffed). She decorated it for holidays, hanging stuff from its antlers. She loved that damn moose, we called it Delbert (originally, it was dilbert, but we had to change the name on our senior shirts). On night during a girls basketball game, there was a scholorship meeting in the library. I had the idea, and told a couple people about it a few days ahead, but I didn't do da deed. I made the comment that someone could go to the meeting, place something in the door to keep it open (as they would lock it when the meeting was over), go back after everyone left, and steal the moose head. Well wouldn't you know, that the next day, it was gone. The librarian was furious. She sat in her office for two days crying. I worked for the school newspaper, and we sent somebody down to talk to her about it, when asked, she didn't say a word, just went back in her office and cried more. The culprit finally fessed up after about a week of nobody knowing, and was suspended. She returned the head, without the decorations (plasticware and a paper hat for Thanksgiving), and the librarian wanted her to pay for them. Good times, good times.

HotBeverage 2,715 9
10/02/2003 03:21 AM

I always got a kick out of tormenting the bus driver. Bus drivers were easier targets since they had even less authority than the trembling, wussy kinds of teachers.

We used to leave all sorts of interesting concoctions made from leftover food from lunch and leave them as gifts for our bus driver. We would also draw penises all over the bus. It was juvenile, but it worked. The thing that drove him (no pun intended) the most crazy was when we would feign terror of his driving skills. "You're scaring us! Please slow down! It's not safe!" You could almost see him transform into Chris Farley's character in Billy Madison.

Hammerhead, Now In Feelaround! 59,399 14
10/02/2003 03:29 AM

I had a bus driver go apeShakespeare over the fact that I wore my hat backwards. He and I got into so many arguments about it, one day we had it out before school, and I told him that he wasn't a teacher, my parent or any type authority figure to me, and that I could wear my hat any damn way I pleased. He tried to make the argument that he hated it when people wouldn't take their hats off for the pledge of allegience or the national anthem. And that most of those people were punk kids who wore their hats backwards. I had my hat on backwards the entire time we argued, and told him that he'd have to physically turn it around if he wanted the bill to face front. Of course I also told him that I wouldn't deal with crying abuse or harassment if he tried, but that I'd just break his arm, wrist, hand and fingers. He left me alone after that...

Who's yur Chickens? 286,208 61
10/02/2003 11:45 AM

I hate it when people wear their hats backwards. Wigger.

Who's yur Chickens? 286,208 61
10/02/2003 11:51 AM

I can remember an openly flamboyant male typing teacher back in the day when Coleridgesmoker was still a bad thing. He was effiminate and wore a huge afro, which looked odd on a white man in the post hippy days. He was teased mercilessly. I can remember the kids chanting very quietly, "Hey, ho, it's time to go" and tapping on the desks in unison to keep the beat. He begged them to stop, but they just kept it up for what seemed like hours at the time.





That doesn't seem that terrifing now, but it was enough to make "Guy Brooks" burst into tears and run from the room never to return.

Who's yur Chickens? 286,208 61
10/02/2003 12:08 PM

Guy was a terribly unfortunate name for a gay man in pre-pc environment.

PuggyD 48,304 12
10/02/2003 12:11 PM

I had this really unstable home ec teacher in seventh and eighth grade. She was like "Serial Mom". She cried at least once a day in class, for various reasons, and most of the time we didn't even have to do anything to set her off. She once cried because my work group put too much sugar in the fruit salad.



But the greatest moment ever was one day she came into class, and just started kind of looking around like she knew something was wrong. Then all of a sudden she goes, "Chairs! There are supposed to be two red and two blue chairs at every table, one of each color on each side. But look! You messed up the chair order!"



She then proceeded to violently pick up, thrash around, and rearrange the chairs back to their original configuration all the time crying and chanting "Red chair! Blue chair! Red chair! Blue Chair!"



It was awesome.

Who's yur Chickens? 286,208 61
10/02/2003 12:21 PM

You took home ec? No wonder you're gay.

Who's yur Chickens? 286,208 61
10/02/2003 12:22 PM

great story though

PuggyD 48,304 12
10/02/2003 12:23 PM

It was required, buttmunch.

Freeze Dried Instant Coffee 10,327 12
10/02/2003 12:42 PM

The prankster/badboy of our senior class made it a point to get ISS (In School Suspension) at least once a month for the sole purpose of tormenting the teacher who happened to be a Desert Storm vet who suffered from occasional flashbacks.

Badboy decided to one day take advantage of the fact that Teacher always took his daily dump after lunch in the ISS potty. Badboy smeared the seat with superglue before Teacher came in and Teacher ended up with paper ass gasket stuck to his butt. The ass gasket was sticking out of the back of his pants where he didn't quite get it all peeled off.

Who's yur Chickens? 286,208 61
10/02/2003 01:06 PM

I'm gonna have to call bullShakespeare on that one. How did he spread glue on the seat, then have the paper assgasket, then his ass all get stuck together? And wouldn't someone with an assgasket stuck to his ass go out of his way to remove as much as possible so as not to have it sticking out?

Chit4Brainz 178,732 15
10/03/2003 08:37 PM

I too had an elementry school teacher that regularly became "unwound" and often to tears as well, and like wild animals, kids seem to have an instinctive abillity to pick out the weak, or the most unfit from the heard. (that is the correct term for a collection of teachers isn't it? Or is it a "Gaggle" ?) Regardless, it became a contest to see, 1.) who could draw the last straw, and 2.) how quickly we could reduce her to tears. Once learned, this is not a habit easily broken for some, and we continued to prey upon the "Runts" year after year, subjecting them to small fires, bulbless projectors were very popular, as well as gluing the desk drawers and the desktop to the teachers desk, and varrious items, from sharp to wet, in the chair of our unfit leader.

Until the day that the grandaddy of suspension slips was handed down and we knew that there would be no topping it, and it all came to a screeching hault. The recipient was a well known prankster, we here will call him, (Ed B.) and the suspension slip read as follows: Suspended from school for no less than 3 days, and to be accompanied by a parent upon return, for the theft of a fetal pig from the biology lab, that later ended up being tossed into the swimming pool, durring the relay race of the girls swim meet causing the race to be haulted.

Pubah 56,744 18
10/03/2003 09:21 PM

If a bus driver drove too fast to 'scare us into being good', we'd jump to one side of the buss during turns attempting to tip it over from the inside.

Bus service was cancelled...we ended up walking to school.