Doc 7,105 13
09/12/2002 11:44 PM

I don't have anything to say, I just feel really bad for this thread.

Superbowl Shuffle 19,936 13
09/13/2002 12:01 AM

MooMoos don't look so out of place.

Fronzel Neekburm 15,959 13
09/13/2002 12:34 AM

O.K., I think I missed the point.



If there wasn't a negro lynching, you weren't in the south.

Fronzel Neekburm 15,959 13
09/13/2002 12:34 AM

And that comment will be used against me in my trial.

Manhattan Fever 11,939 13
09/13/2002 01:16 AM

I'm just curious as to what is considered the South. Arizona isn't on the West Coast but we're pretty far down South...not to mention we're referred to exclusively as the Southwest when it comes down to it.



If you ever have the chance to take a good look around you'd be surprised at the condition certain parts of this sh*thole are in. I remember maybe a month ago there was this huge storm and I was riding in my friend's Ranchero. He had to cut through all these little streets just to get to the grocery store, the storm had knocked out all the stop lights and such. Anywhose we were driving through these neighborhoods that I wasn't really familiar with. And it struck me all at once when I took a good look around, I swear to God it looked like we were in Mississippi. Barefoot children with the ugliest little faces, more dirt roads than asphalt, clotheslines up the wazoo and little plastic decaying bikes scattered in front yards.

My hubby is gay 1,522 10
09/13/2002 04:43 AM

When did you move to Hialeah, FL?

Bonky 75,728 15
09/13/2002 08:42 AM

Up until I began posting on GAB, I believed I lived in the South. I'm not in the Southern-most state, but I'm south of most of you.



It turns out, I live in the Southwest and apparently, it's better.

I'm Leppy, and I'm a GABaholic. 12,056 12
09/13/2002 08:45 AM

Hialeah?



Where do you live, Hubby? Central Fl?

Professor Nutbutter 181,255 35
09/13/2002 09:47 AM

Anything South of Providence, RI is "the South"



You're all a bunch of hicks.

Feeble, possessed by the demon Chackens 32,400 15
09/13/2002 09:50 AM

South="Part of Confederacy, East of Mississippi"



Southwest="Part of Mexican Cession"



Texas="Texas"



Midwest="Louisiana purchase / Northwest Territory, unless in South".



Pacific Northwest = "Oregon + Washington".



See? It's easy!

Chackens, Original Recipe 286,208 61
09/13/2002 10:02 AM

And you're all beaver Frosters, eh.

Squeamish 38,986 14
09/13/2002 11:06 AM

>South="Part of Confederacy, East of Mississippi"



So Mississippi, Arkansas and Louisiana aren't "in the South?" We're the redneck-iest of the bunch. Our breakthroughs in poverty, racial inequity and overall despair are the basis for the programs in every other Southern state.



"The South" is Louisiana, Mississippi, Arkansas, Alabama, Georgia, Tennessee, Both Carolinas, Both Virginias, and Kentucky. Florida gets an honorable mention for the panhandle, but below that it's not really "The South."

Miss Trixxie LeMay Chakens 65,021 15
09/13/2002 11:15 AM

You left out our achievmints in educasion, healf care and infaunt mortallititty

Squeamish 38,986 14
09/13/2002 11:25 AM

I also forgot our breakthrough chitlin' research.

Miss Trixxie LeMay Chakens 65,021 15
09/13/2002 11:27 AM

The really sad thing is I only think I misspelled one word in the above post.

Squeamish 38,986 14
09/13/2002 11:27 AM

* pours an achievmint julep *

Aphrodite 2,261 13
09/13/2002 11:32 AM

Personally, I am greatly thankful for the existance of the south. It's the only section of the country more backward than the midwest. We're only saved by the existance of Chicago, where Iowans will always be considered just shy of Amish to the rest of you "civilized" states.

Miss Trixxie LeMay Chakens 65,021 15
09/13/2002 11:34 AM

You know, Yankies can make fun of the south all the want, and I have three words for them: Maine and New Jersey.

Squeamish 38,986 14
09/13/2002 11:37 AM

I'd like to apologize on behalf of the LA public school system for Trixxie.



Back when he in school they learned to count using teeth instead of fingers, which is why he can only count to 2 but I can count to 24.

Rich (The Compass) 641 12
09/13/2002 11:39 AM

New Jersey isn't a "Yankee state", it's a "whiny polluted Shakespeare-hole".



Maine I cannot defend.

froglord - banger of turtles 9,243 13
09/13/2002 12:00 PM

steps up to defend the midwest.





looks around







sits down quietly

Manhattan Fever 11,939 13
09/13/2002 12:40 PM

I almost forgot...



When we were driving through that area of town we came to this Stop sign, and standing near were these two ugly white trash children no more than 12 or 13. I pop my head out the Ranchero, look em real good in the eye...



"Hey...you ever seen a grown man naked?"

I am Crickette's Monday Morning 2,472 12
09/13/2002 12:45 PM

Since when is green not a color?

Admiral Feeble 32,400 15
09/13/2002 12:49 PM

Should have said "Mississippi RIVER". Or "THE Mississippi".



Lousiana is an embarassment even to Dixie.

Zen 96 10
09/13/2002 01:01 PM

Canadaians! National food is fatback, drink Labatt's and call it beer, and haven't been able to take a crap for 22 years because health food there is a CHEESEburger. Oh, and did I mention, the great Gretzky left ya'll for a b-movie harlot!!!???

Miss Trixxie LeMay Chakens 65,021 15
09/13/2002 01:23 PM

<Cartman voice> "say why don't you Canadians go get your hand guns and come to the shooting range with us?, Oh, that's right you Canadians can't own hand guns <Cartman voice>

Feeble, possessed by the demon Chackens 32,400 15
09/13/2002 02:27 PM

I'll admit Canada is better when they don't have Queen Elizabeth's ugly mug on their so-nicely-colored money.



And when they stop having to import most of their manufactured goods from the civilized U.S.

crissypooh 20 10
09/13/2002 03:09 PM

I have been tempted to move from the Florida to Canada, because they have an excellent health care system. But then I remembered how much I hate snow. Cold weather makes me quite unhappy. and I like my year 'round supply of mosquitos, and tourists, and the hideous sight of some middle-aged hippo of a man wandering around walmart in a wife-beater tanktop and tiny jogging shorts looking for the noxema because he ran out of sunscreen before he could cover his enormous white hairy back.... what was i saying? Oh yeah, I have always considered moving to Canada from Florida. We have enough Canadians here I feel like I'm there already.

crissypooh 20 10
09/13/2002 03:14 PM

and to squeamish, thank you for the honorable mention, I live in Panama City, I work out on the beach, we are definitely still the south. (shivers)

Squeamish 38,986 14
09/13/2002 03:19 PM

Panama City is definitely the South, I gave an exemption for the panhandle.



>they have an excellent health care system



Correction: They have a pretty good helath care system if you're poor.

Miss Trixxie LeMay Chakens 65,021 15
09/13/2002 04:33 PM

I think if the world gets that warm all the glaciers breaking off and crushing everything in their path are going to wreck havoic on Canadian real estate values.

My hubby is gay 1,522 10
09/13/2002 04:37 PM

Panama City, The Redneck Riviera.



That's definitely in The South.



Thank God I live in Broward.

Feeble, possessed by the demon Chackens 32,400 15
09/13/2002 04:41 PM

After Canada melts it will be smaller than Rhode Island.

Feeble, possessed by the demon Chackens 32,400 15
09/13/2002 04:51 PM

You ought to try logging in, salvage. I'd have clicked a couple of yours so far.

Doc 7,105 13
09/13/2002 06:07 PM

That ain't salvage.

My hubby is gay 1,522 10
09/13/2002 06:10 PM

Yeah, it's more of a treasure hunt.

Doc 7,105 13
09/13/2002 06:16 PM

salvage dosed himself with a sheet of blotter acid. His name is now Harold Jenkins and he works third shift at the local Texaco in Hooper Valley, Kansas.

Lindsey 988 13
09/13/2002 08:38 PM

>Texas="Texas"



No Shakespeare?

Feeble, possessed by the demon Chackens 32,400 15
09/13/2002 08:40 PM

Tautology was necessary for completeness of the enumeration, kiddo.

Lindsey 988 13
09/13/2002 08:46 PM

It's great to be back!

Doc 7,105 13
09/13/2002 08:48 PM

Hehe.

Lindsey 988 13
09/13/2002 08:56 PM

Thassright.



Click it, bitch.

Fronzel Neekburm 15,959 13
09/13/2002 09:11 PM

We went to lunch with a few of the secretaries today. I started talking to one of them and in the course of the conversation I asked "Whatever happened to that mutant stumpumper that came along last time?"



And she gave me a cold stare and said "That was my fourth cousin Steve. He quit after we got married."



I almost broke down and cried. The only real answer I have is that they are from a town of about 100, and I meant Mutant Stumpjumper in the nice way.

Squeamish 38,986 14
09/13/2002 11:15 PM

If thewy really were 4th cousins they should be about 60 years apart in age. Unless it's her 4th cousin 3 times removed.



Anyway, you share about as much DNA with your 4th cousin as you do with Apollo Creed (the first man on the moon).

My hubby is gay 1,522 10
09/13/2002 11:19 PM

Wasn't Steve Austin the first man on the moon?

Doc 7,105 13
09/14/2002 12:23 AM

Does Tennesse have a state law that requires it's citizens to know *that* much obscure information on placement of cousins, etc etc?

Fronzel Neekburm 15,959 13
09/14/2002 12:59 AM

I'm going off of what she said, She's a temp secretary. She can't be all that smart.



Frankly, I had heard about as much of her personal life as I could stand.

Bean 8,503 19
09/14/2002 04:00 AM

Is there an airforce base in or around Panama City? I have an ex boyfriend who lives there and he's in the airforce.

Bean 8,503 19
09/14/2002 04:02 AM

When we visited the south last Thanksgiving, it was... interesting.



I swear the only vegetables they eat there are lima beans. When his mother came to visit, she cooked lima beans. When we went there, the only veggies she had in her cupboard were lima beans. On Thanksgiving day we had sweet potatoes and lima beans. I hate lima beans. Thank God I don't live in the south.

Feeble, possessed by the demon Chackens 32,400 15
09/14/2002 02:10 PM

No black-eyed peas?

Superbowl Shuffle 19,936 13
09/14/2002 06:09 PM

I've never seen a lima bean.

Feeble, Knight of the Old Code 32,400 15
09/14/2002 06:16 PM

Half of all succotash is Lima beans.

Superbowl Shuffle 19,936 13
09/14/2002 06:17 PM

I've never seen a succotash.

Squeamish 38,986 14
09/14/2002 06:19 PM

I was mistaken, 4th cousins would be about the same age (assuming the generations stayed about the same distance apart after the family branched.)



4th cousins share common great, great, great grandparents.

Declan McManus 131,867 36
09/14/2002 10:34 PM

Succotash can be very good.



I like to make a different, lighter, succotash with green beans, instead of limas.

My hubby is gay 1,522 10
09/14/2002 10:36 PM

Succotash is a good thing.



<marthastewart>

vertical bob 26,707 13
09/15/2002 05:41 PM

Thufferin' thuccotash!

Bean 8,503 19
09/15/2002 05:50 PM

Correction. She made black eyed peas AND lima beans when she came here, but when we went there it was just lima beans.

crissypooh 20 10
09/16/2002 11:15 PM

per Bean's question, yes there are several air force bases in and around panama city, how do you think I ended up back on this awful pennisula. there is Tyndall afb, Eglin afb, Hurlburt (yes, I see the humor) afb and Duke afb. and a few navy and coast gaurd stations. didya know that the coast guard in not part of the department of defense? they fall under the dept. of tranportation.... and in their blue work coveralls they look like the old goober the gas station attendant on Mayberry RFD.

Heather, busty redhead. 86,684 14
09/17/2002 09:44 AM

I'm more southern than all of you!



can I be a redneck now?

Heather, busty redhead. 86,684 14
09/17/2002 09:46 AM

actually, I was called a redneck a few days ago by 2 young aboriginal fellows.



They rocked up to the shop, already full of alcohol, and I refused to serve them. so they kicked some things, threatened me with death, looked at my name badge and said 'I'll be back for you Jim'.





I never saw them again.



nice boys.

My hubby is gay 1,522 10
09/17/2002 09:50 AM

Nope, first you have to prove one of the following:



A) Married to a first cousin.

B) Your sister is married to a first cousin.

C) Your dad is also your uncle and brother.

or

D) The trailer has a "For Sale" sign hung on one of the cars that have been parked in the driveway for at least ten years.