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My cat is in heat.
I swear on Dom Delouise' third stomach that I'm GOING TO KILL HER.
Twice she's dug her nose into my armpit. Apperently it smells like cat penis.
She rolls all over the floor....crying crying crying.
"Kittie, momma needs the wang too, but unfortunately, we're both out of luck."
This didn't calm her down.
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Like This? Rate It!
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Hilarious
6 votes
4.5
/live?func=new_user&msgid=680467
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0 votes
0.0
/live?func=new_user&msgid=680468
JuJuBe Monkey! 23,705  11
03/27/2003 07:18 PM
Ain't no thang! when the ladies man is here I got time to knock out two pussies!
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0 votes
0.0
/live?func=new_user&msgid=680469
JuJuBe Monkey! 23,705 11
03/27/2003 07:18 PM
<action>puts on boxing gloves</action>
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Hilarious
2 votes
4.0
/live?func=new_user&msgid=680471
Declan McManus dances again on broken glass 131,869 36
03/27/2003 07:26 PM
Dead Robot said something along this line a while back at the other place.
He wound up jilling off his cats.
Just sayin'....
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0 votes
0.0
/live?func=new_user&msgid=680472
red the opinionated and her trained bush 600 16
03/27/2003 07:28 PM
Declan:
You get me a teensy tiny vibrator and some tuna flavored lube, and you got yourself a deal!
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0 votes
0.0
/live?func=new_user&msgid=680473
Declan McManus dances again on broken glass 131,869 36
03/27/2003 07:31 PM
red..
Tuna flavoured lube? Hairball remedy is vaseline, malt, vitamins, and fish flavour.
As for a vibrator that small, I am currently out of ideas.
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Side-splitting
15 votes
5.0
/live?func=new_user&msgid=680500
Sleestack 30,342 13
03/27/2003 09:55 PM
I dunno... Maybe an old electric toothbrush sans the bruOH MY GOD WHAT AM I THINKING?
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0 votes
0.0
/live?func=new_user&msgid=680531
red the opinionated and her trained bush 600 16
03/28/2003 01:38 AM
Yeah, we've been meaning to do that.
Keep in mind we've had the cat for three weeks.
That, and I'm Queen Procrastinator. Hell, I just shaved my legs for the first time in about four years.
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0 votes
0.0
/live?func=new_user&msgid=680533
Trumpet the Insult Badger 1,677 10
03/28/2003 01:48 AM
She ain't lying people. Heh.
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0 votes
0.0
/live?func=new_user&msgid=680539
Daggy 86,684 14
03/28/2003 02:18 AM
<action>faints dead away.....</action>
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Chuckleworthy
1 votes
2.0
/live?func=new_user&msgid=680572
If at First You Don't Succeed, Trae, Trae Again 156,785 17
03/28/2003 08:13 AM
I had a friend who put his sisters chapstick on her cat's ass, then put it back where he found it.
She used it and never knew.
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Chuckleworthy
1 votes
2.0
/live?func=new_user&msgid=680621
Chickens 286,321 61
03/28/2003 10:01 AM
AmyPoo tips a 40 for her homie
3/27/2003 11:34 pm [TTjaG8cc9iwdgNYloI1VdA]
just use a screwdriver.
AmyPoo tips a 40 for her homie
3/27/2003 11:34 pm [TTjaG8cc9iwdgNYloI1VdA]
or, i don't know, FIX YOUR CAT.
With the screwdriver.
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0 votes
0.0
/live?func=new_user&msgid=680627
SheCabbage 5,200 13
03/28/2003 10:05 AM
Make the appointment now and you won't have to deal with this next time.
Just lock the cat in the bathroom and douse it in the shower for good measure.
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Chuckleworthy
1 votes
2.0
/live?func=new_user&msgid=680634
Chickens 286,321 61
03/28/2003 10:13 AM
He wound up jilling off his cats.
ewwwwww
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0 votes
0.0
/live?func=new_user&msgid=680755
breathing 29 10
03/28/2003 01:52 PM
I would like to be a cat but not for the bonking bit: Poor ol tom cat tries his best but .... delicately pounces and digs his dainty teeth into the loose neck skin of the hissing and growling female. Stop it, I like it, it hurts. Rurrrrrr, shakes him off and stomps away in disgust - three months later satisfied kitty purrs.
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0 votes
0.0
/live?func=new_user&msgid=680758
SheCabbage 5,200 13
03/28/2003 01:56 PM
Gee, and the female cat freaking out has nothing to do with the fact that the male cat's penis has barbs on it.
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0 votes
0.0
/live?func=new_user&msgid=680759
SheCabbage 5,200 13
03/28/2003 01:58 PM
Red, you should sing to your cat. That's what I did, it was most refreshing.
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0 votes
0.0
/live?func=new_user&msgid=680760
Huggie Bare 5,357 10
03/28/2003 02:01 PM
Masterbate with your cat...
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Hilarious
4 votes
4.5
/live?func=new_user&msgid=680761
salvage of the Elite 28,986 12
03/28/2003 02:08 PM
I like it when my penis has Barb on it.
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Chuckleworthy
1 votes
2.0
/live?func=new_user&msgid=680781
Chickens 286,321 61
03/28/2003 02:47 PM
Your cat's name is Barb?
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Chuckleworthy
1 votes
2.0
/live?func=new_user&msgid=680791
Mavis Beacon 18,219 13
03/28/2003 02:55 PM
<action>Red Rocket!! Red Rocket!!</action>When we had our Girl Kitty (that's her name) fixed she had a little kitty abortion. It was cute.
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0 votes
0.0
/live?func=new_user&msgid=680792
Mavis Beacon 18,219 13
03/28/2003 02:57 PM
You tried to write something that's already been written. Usually this happens accidentally, when you thought your submission didn't go through (it did) and so you hit the "Submit" button twice.
Sometimes it happens intentionally, when you're obnoxiously repeating something over and over.
Whatever the case, edit your message below and make it different, or hit the button above to forget the whole thing.
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