Frogpop 173,153 25
07/13/2004 09:32 AM

Fail English. That'll learn her.

Ditdah - csme's lesbian bitch 123,102 14
07/13/2004 09:43 AM

College teacher or high school teacher?



(like I need to ask)

Dead Robot 67,630 16
07/13/2004 09:44 AM

Have sex with her on her desk then report it to the board. That will learn her.

Fartpuppy - Now with 20% more lurk 5,142 13
07/13/2004 09:48 AM

Make her cry.



End of story.

Feckoff 2,552 9
07/13/2004 09:49 AM

Ask her why all Emily Dickinson's poems can be sung to the same tune as "The Yellow Rose Of Texas"

GoBanana 590 10
07/13/2004 09:49 AM

High school teacher, can't you tell I'm a dumbass?



And no I'm not having sex with her,shes old and ugly, and I just started puberty yesterday.

Dead Robot 67,630 16
07/13/2004 09:52 AM

Even better. Pure National Enquirer stuff.

GoBanana 590 10
07/13/2004 09:52 AM

Cmon! can't you guys be a little more creative, your supposed to be funny dammit!

Dead Robot 67,630 16
07/13/2004 09:53 AM

you're



Maybe you should be paying attention in her class.

GoBanana 590 10
07/13/2004 09:53 AM

It's not a spelling B.

GoBanana 590 10
07/13/2004 09:55 AM

I have another english class I pay attention in that.

Dead Robot 67,630 16
07/13/2004 09:55 AM

Bee



Sigh...how are you at sports?





Sod that, how are you at flipping burgers?

Ditdah - csme's lesbian bitch 123,102 14
07/13/2004 09:57 AM

You have TWO english classes and you STILL can't spell or write?



Make us all happy. Shoot yourself.

Declan McManus, Irritated American. 131,874 36
07/13/2004 09:59 AM

Time to chlorinate the gene pool.

Dead Robot 67,630 16
07/13/2004 09:59 AM

Okay here's my patented Dead Robot drive the teacher crazy trick (stolen completely from my brother who got it from some comedian I am sure):



Softly, coo like a pidgeon. Stare out the window when you do it. Look concerned, as if you can't see where it's coming from. Stop just before she says something.



Repeat.

GoBanana 590 10
07/13/2004 09:59 AM

Once again this is NOT about my spelling, it's about making people feel bad.

GoBanana 590 10
07/13/2004 10:03 AM

can it be any type of bird noise?

Dogs Akimbo 211,526 32
07/13/2004 10:03 AM

Pay attention in class and become a master of the English language. Sign up for and excel in Advanced courses in Mathematics, History and several foreign languages.



Apply to several Ivy League colleges. Attend all of your college classes and graduate with a 4.0 GPA. Apply to and be accepted by The Wharton School.



Graduate with honors and get a low-level Shakespeare job in the government. Come to work early, stay late, flatter your bosses and rise through the ranks.



Come to the attention of an extremely wealthy behind-the-scenes power broker and run for a state office. After a few years, make a successful run for U.S. Representative.



Sponsor and support popular and far-reaching bills that trim the size of the federal government, return money to the pockets of hard-working American citizens and causes the rest of the world to once again have respect for the United States of America.



Run for president and be elected with the largest margin of victory since 1932.



Return to the school and have one of your Secret Service agents kick her in the Carroll.

Declan McManus, Irritated American. 131,874 36
07/13/2004 10:03 AM

it's about making people feel bad



To make a person feel bad, chop off their fingers.

Dogs Akimbo 211,526 32
07/13/2004 10:03 AM

But since she would probably be dead by then, just go up and kick her in the Carroll.

Dead Robot 67,630 16
07/13/2004 10:06 AM

Point out how the bottoms of her arms flutter in the breeze when she writes on the board.



That always made the back of my english class laugh.

GoBanana 590 10
07/13/2004 10:07 AM

Dog I'm an aussie, so that won't work.

Dead Robot 67,630 16
07/13/2004 10:08 AM

Flush her down the toilet and watch her go the wrong way!

Ditdah - csme's lesbian bitch 123,102 14
07/13/2004 10:09 AM

I love you Robot!

GoBanana 590 10
07/13/2004 10:10 AM

You know not everything on the simpsons is true.

Proud Elitist 2,629 9
07/13/2004 10:10 AM

There is no limit to the trouble you can cause, but it all depends on how many classmates you can get in on it (prob not very many. HS is filled with sniffling pussies).



I am reminded of the time a friend of mine made it his mission in life to have a teacher seek an early retirement from one of his classes at princeton (booooo princeton!)



He got his whole class in on it, and eventually, the male teacher almost cried in front of the class and ended up leaving the school after thanksgiving break.



So you want suggestions?

Write insulting comments on the board before she comes into the room(try not to make them too juvenile (sp)). Have the class convince her she said something she didn't, then go back on it a second later.

Have the class meet in a different class down the hall, and ask her why she didn't show up. Have the whole class show up 15 minutes later, or 30 minutes early



The key to tormenting any prof/teacher is to make them doubt themselves. What you actually do is up to you, but your goal is to have the teacher go from thinking "they must be playing a trick on me" to "no, I just made a silly mistake" to eventually living in a state of fear / confusion.



So be relentless and you have to keep the abuse coming. Nothing really bad, just stuff that will get under her skin until she goes insane. A good example follows:



Have one person in the class hum, when the teacher turns to look at that person, they stop, and someone else resumes the humming for them. repeat as necessary.



I'f I'm of any help..... *cough* clickies *cough*



remember, don't do anything that she can concretley pin on anyone, it's just a "simple misunderstanding"......

Dead Robot 67,630 16
07/13/2004 10:11 AM

Bows. Notices the time.



Off to work. See ya!



Trips over drink cart

GoBanana 590 10
07/13/2004 10:16 AM

Proud, you are a funny mutha Froster. If you've got anymore suggestions, I'd greatly appreciate it. Oh and I gave you alot of clickies to.

Dogs Akimbo 211,526 32
07/13/2004 10:21 AM

Dog I'm an aussie, so that won't work.



Ah...then you'd be stuck with all that learnin' and knowledge and stuff.

Proud Elitist 2,629 9
07/13/2004 10:23 AM

GoBanana,

glad I could help, your cause is a noble one.



If I think of anything else while dosing in my Poli Sci class I'll post.

GoBanana 590 10
07/13/2004 10:23 AM

*cries*

GoBanana 590 10
07/13/2004 10:25 AM

ok, but do you have to get the whole class in on it? can it just be a select few.

Lord Dyran 6,040 9
07/13/2004 10:25 AM

That's politically incorrect; we call them elves, not litt- ... I mean, it's the OTHER way, not the wrong way. Just like europeans drive on the OTHER side of the road.



Remember, if it's not the same as you, it's wrong.



This public service announcement has been brought to you by the number 420.

Proud Elitist 2,629 9
07/13/2004 10:29 AM

Well the more people in on it, the more you can do.



Also, if super glue were to happen to find the way into the lock of your classroom, so she couldn't open the door, that would be funny. But remember, that would be vandalism!





PS

Dogs Akimbo, are you an alumn / student of Penn? What gives with the Wharton Mention?

If you are affiliated, much love fellow quaker

GoBanana 590 10
07/13/2004 10:32 AM

Well everyone in the class hates her, so I don't think anyone would taddle.

GoBanana 590 10
07/13/2004 10:33 AM

Oh and shes also rather stupid, so thats a plus.

Proud Elitist 2,629 9
07/13/2004 10:34 AM

Word.



those who can't do, teach



those who can't teach, teach gym

ringworm 68,315 13
07/13/2004 11:37 AM

are australian teachers paid enough to put up w/ this bullShakespeare from snot-nosed little idiots? american teachers generally aren't.

Pegleg Chickens 286,472 61
07/13/2004 12:08 PM

Hypothetically, of course,



1. Find out where she lives.

2. Have her mail forwarded from her home to an empty po box.

3. Sign her up for hundreds of catelogues for everything from williams sinoma to gay porn and have all that mailed to the school address in her name.

4. Write "Emily Dickenson Sucks" in her front yard in gasolene. Don't light it. The gas will die and she will have a nice message to read for some time. Even if she replants the area, the message will come in greener than the rest of the yard.

5. Send anchovie pizzas to her house daily.

6. Don't take any of my advice.

7. Study hard and pass her class as she is just in teaching cause she cares about you and wants you to do well. It's not like she's getting rich putting up with your snotty ass.

Sacapuntas 432 8
07/13/2004 12:22 PM

My favorite way to piss off a teacher is to sleep during class, don't participate at all, and never do the assignments. Then ace the exams. She'll be itching to fail you. It will really bunch up her granny panties to pass you.



(This plan will not work for dumb asses)

csme: boobies exposed, kinda 15,189 12
07/13/2004 12:28 PM

Bananas is out then.

Sacapuntas 432 8
07/13/2004 01:50 PM

Teacher, I got glue in my mouth and it accidentally got in my stomache.

Marilyn 12,471 13
07/13/2004 07:36 PM

Pretend you think you are in math class and answer all of her questions in numbers.



Observe.



Q: Does anyone know the subjunctive tense of "make"?



A: -11



And then smile proudly.

Jonnybgood 203,475 12
07/13/2004 08:02 PM

You can throw up on her. I know it's almost like pooping on her head, but it's more realistic.

GoBanana 590 10
07/14/2004 12:58 AM

Since when is my ass snotty?

Frogpop 173,153 25
07/14/2004 02:20 AM

Chickens, aren't you, like, an adult? and a Republican, to boot?













NARC!

Dogs Akimbo 211,526 32
07/15/2004 07:09 PM

...causes the rest of the world to once again have respect for the United States of America.



Can I safely assume that this is the line that most of the non-Americans found amusing?

piXXXie 5,871 11
07/15/2004 08:47 PM

I'm an American and clickied.

AussieSarah 8,390 9
07/16/2004 01:32 AM

GoBanana

You being an Aussie explains you spelling. I graduated the Australian school system and can't spell to save my life [I passed because I showed up for the exam].

I found taking a diamond python to class livened things up a little .Feeding it the school science labs mice can be entertaining too.

GoBanana 590 10
07/16/2004 07:41 AM

We don't have mice in the science labs, knowing our school they where probably stolen.

AussieSarah 8,390 9
07/16/2004 08:07 AM

GoBanana

What school/state ?

GoBanana 590 10
07/16/2004 08:18 AM

NSW



Mt View High school.



If you live in NSW you probably would of heard of the west cessnock primary school library being burnt down. Well it's sort of near that.

AussieSarah 8,390 9
07/16/2004 08:20 AM

Where were you when it burnt down ???

GoBanana 590 10
07/16/2004 08:21 AM

I was..... at the flower shop.

Dead Robot 67,630 16
07/16/2004 08:52 AM

Where exactly?

AussieSarah 8,390 9
07/16/2004 09:10 AM

we're moving up that way around november [gosford]

GoBanana 590 10
07/16/2004 10:32 AM

Cessnock. It's about 40 minutes from newcastle.

AussieSarah 8,390 9
07/16/2004 10:43 AM

Yeah but Gosford is closer than where we are at the moment !

So what have you decided to do to that teacher of yours ?

GoBanana 590 10
07/16/2004 10:47 AM

Well I don't go back to school until tuesday, but I'd say I'll use Prouds ideas, they where funny.