Phla Mignon-dairy creamer 130,632 34
11/08/2004 09:30 PM

gravy



sorry

Trae - Gobble Gobble! 156,771 17
11/08/2004 09:35 PM

Some nasty green jello salad with walnuts and pineapple.



Every year we have it.

Every year no one eats it.

It's a curse.



Also, when I was little my Swedish relatives always brought PICKLED HERRING to any holiday party. The little fish peices with the capers floating in the pickle juice like little eyeballs....staring at me.



Ewwwwww.

Robin 14,626 9
11/08/2004 09:41 PM

Mashed Rutabegas, only time they ever show up on the table.



Polenta, corn mush, just salt and pepper as seasonings.

Lamburkey (ready for sloppy seconds) 33,017 9
11/08/2004 09:42 PM

Spam

Nerd in his Turret 27,000 12
11/08/2004 09:42 PM

Starburst Fruit Chews.

Lamburkey (ready for sloppy seconds) 33,017 9
11/08/2004 09:44 PM

You win.

millie will bring the pies 116,854 28
11/08/2004 09:45 PM

That green bean cassarole with onion rings on top (but it tastes sort of good).



My mother hates homemade cranberry sauce, so we always have the kind that's still in the shape of the can.

Trae - Gobble Gobble! 156,771 17
11/08/2004 09:47 PM

Kickass Millie!



Throw a can of spam on the griddle, some fat back and some cobbler for dessert and you got yourself a white trash Turkey day, sister!

McRib, cranberry saucing you up 13,155 9
11/08/2004 09:53 PM

A few years back, my mother had made meatloaf, of all things, for Thanksgiving dinner. I was so dumbfounded I never asked why in the hell we were having meatloaf in the first place. I made the mistake of telling my friends at work the next day. I never heard the end of it.

Phuc 237,453 20
11/08/2004 10:09 PM

Raisins in anything that also has vegetables. Double points off if the raisins are yellow.



Anything with Jello that's not just plain old Jello.



Anything with marshmallows that doesn't also have graham crackers and chonklit. If it has graham crackers and chonklit and meat, double points given.

millie will bring the pies 116,854 28
11/08/2004 10:14 PM

Actually, we never had the green beans at my house--I have had them at other peoples' houses.



My mother is Italian, and we usually have lasagna along with the turkey dinner.



One of my sisters thinks she's a gourmet, and always makes something that no one wants to eat. She and my mom got in a fight one year because my sister had made homemade cranberry sauce and my mother didn't want it--she wanted the canned kind.



So, we had both. No one ate my sister's sauce, and she blamed the presence of the can-shaped one (so much more appetizing!)

Swizz - los trastos en el tronco 3,957 10
11/08/2004 10:19 PM

All hail can shaped sauce!!

Whistler P. McManus 183,262 42
11/08/2004 10:19 PM

EJ's Puerto Rican foster parents have rice and beans with their turkey on Thanksgiving. Her sister's Brooklyn guinea husband insists on lasagna as a side dish for turkey.



The weirdest side dish my mother makes is the baby onions in cream sauce. She also makes the driest damn turkey imaginable. Tastes like sawdust.

Robin 14,626 9
11/08/2004 10:30 PM

my grandma once made an oyster and chestnut stuffing for the turkey.



it's also tradion to have cole slaw at my mom's house.

Dirty Dianada 57,119 105
11/08/2004 10:38 PM

I used to hate stuffing, and all my friends would ask why, because apparently their parents made delicious stuffing. I didn't understand how they could like it so much, until last year, when I discovered that not everyone's mom makes stuffing with ground beef. That's what I get for having a mom from another continent.

Declan McManus, Daily Prophet Food Columnist, '04 130,657 34
11/08/2004 10:39 PM

The best Thanksgiving was Thanksgiving 1995.



I was at Whistler and EJ's old place. They had a lovely big kitchen, and Whistler and I put on a big meal.



The oddest thing was one of the several things I made, and it was still good. Sweet potatoes, peaches, butter, a (very) little brown sugar, and cashews.



We had a wonderful turkey (co-produced by Whistler and me), mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, dressing (baked separately, NOT in the bird), and a lot of other things. Cousin Randi brought a selection of very good bakery pies. Our friend Donna was there....Donna is no longer alive.



It was the bestest Thanksgiving I can remember.

Jantastic 10,022 10
11/08/2004 11:17 PM

We have oyster dressing in addition to the regular kind. Dad is the only one who eats the oyster dressing.



We also have a traditional family dish, affectionatly known as "Frog Eye Salad." Despite the charming name, it's really good--tiny round pasta, pineapple chunks, mandarin oranges, and Cool Whip.

Llama- packing on the holiday llbs 7,194 10
11/08/2004 11:29 PM

Nearly every year my dad makes duck stuffed with a mixture of sticky rice, Chinese sausage, and water chestnuts.



Apparently the pilgrims were thankful for sticky rice, Chinese sausage, and water chestnuts. And sometimes shrimp if it's on sale.

Llama- packing on the holiday llbs 7,194 10
11/08/2004 11:32 PM

Ooh! And Chinese people seem to define salad as the following:



Two egg yolks mixed with pure vegetable oil to make a mayonnaise-like substance, apples, potatoes, spam, more Chinese sausage, green peas, pineapple chunks, and hard-boiled eggs.



I used to think it was just my family that did that, but I recently saw that dish at another Chinese person's dinner table, only with the addition of bananas.

Fat Fat Fatty McFaticus 10,061 9
11/08/2004 11:32 PM

She also makes the driest damn turkey imaginable. Tastes like sawdust.



We might be related, Whistler. Tell me, did your mother ever choke on her sawdust turkey?

Jokey McSimpsonsMeme 12,005 11
11/08/2004 11:39 PM

House centipede pie.

Raw house centipede pie.

FRESH raw house centipede pie.

DIG IN

erika the dumbass tofurkey 76,152 9
11/08/2004 11:44 PM

Bread soup. It's and old family recipe, and it's literally chicken broth and cubes of stale italian bread fried in egg and parmesan cheese. Can you tell my grandparents grew up during the Depression?







It's actually really good though.

Dread Pirate Sunshine: Scourge of the internet 8,426 9
11/08/2004 11:51 PM

deep fried squirrel testicles

with a tooth pick through each and a little oregano sprinkled on them...



I've never actually seen this done, but that would just make it that much more weird.

Dogs Akimbo 205,285 31
11/08/2004 11:52 PM

Sweet pickles.



To the juice from a jar of dill pickles, add a few cloves of garlic and some sugar (1/2 cup?). Put the pickles back in and let them stand for a few days.

Jajoba 1,357 10
11/09/2004 05:18 AM

Tell me, did your mother ever choke on her sawdust turkey?



More to the point did you let her choke to death?

I got Chit to be thankful for 178,088 15
11/09/2004 05:27 AM

I ate at a girlfriends house once, and after they piled an assload of turkey on my plate, her father announced that margret had the bird in almost nine hours. I almost gagged on my tongue, much less the Turkey Jerkey I had to choke down.

Turd Blossom Snork 45,631 12
11/09/2004 07:09 AM

Man cheese.

Whistler P. McManus 183,262 42
11/09/2004 09:33 AM

We might be related, Whistler. Tell me, did your mother ever choke on her sawdust turkey?



I sure hope we're not related, Pistol. Because as my brother will attest, incest is where I draw the line.

Phuc 237,453 20
11/09/2004 09:48 AM

And sometimes shrimp if it's on sale.



So instead of shopping till you dropping on Black Friday, the fambly has a group heave over the bowl?

Ms. Trixxie Queen of the Turducken People 65,014 14
11/09/2004 09:52 AM

One thing I had in South Carolina I never had on T-Day before was a pearl onion stew in a dark roux gravy. It was delicious. Traditional family things are not gross: Cauliflower au gratin, cornbread dressing, rice dressing (jambalaya) Waldorf Salad, Green bean casserole, etc.



We also celebrate Thanksgiving a week early at work. Some things you people might find weird. Cracklins, ( pig skin deep fried in pig fat) Boudin <Boo' Dan> (the second source of all evil in the universe next to hog's head cheese, which I have a story about. Hog's Head Cheese which is source of all evil in the universe, raw oysters, deer sausage, Boudin Balls, opossum.

Fat Fat Fatty McFaticus 10,061 9
11/09/2004 10:02 AM

Unfortunately, I wasn't with my grandmother when she choked so I couldn't stop everyone else from helping her.



But, Whistler, I agree. Being related would be a big turn off. I may live in the South but I'm not that far South. I propose that we pretend it never happened and continue our relationship.

Aimless 54,807 10
11/09/2004 10:14 AM

My Aunt Steph makes pounds and pounds of Lefsa every year (like a tortilla shell with butter, cinnamon and sugar, only the shell is made of potato) and last year she made Lingon berry salad that was so awful it made your eyes burn.



My mom and grandam have a long standing war with eachother over who makes the best baked beans (my grandma) and so we have two pots of baked beans every year and they check (when they think no one is looking) to see who has less left after dinner.

turtle10 41,927 26
11/09/2004 10:21 AM

I was tricked into eating Lamb for thanksgiving once. I thought it was raost beef, it wasn't.



That was a baaaaad Thanksgiving

Saucy Humongous Panda Breasts 181,271 70
11/09/2004 10:40 AM

I absolutely cannot have Thanksgiving dinner without the following:



Broccoli & Rice casserole made w/ either Velveeta or Cheese Whiz



Cornbread dressing (not that white bread gluey Shakespeare)



Gravy WITH giblets & chopped egg



Sweet Potato Souffle - this is where it gets weird - Mashed sweet potatos, butter, a touch of brown sugar, and a dash of pumpkin pie spice topped with a mixture of crushed cornflakes, chopped pecans, butter and brown sugar. It's the most amazing dish ever.

Jerk wants Puddin for Christmas 4,016 9
11/09/2004 10:49 AM

For my thanksgiving dinner we had stir-fry with chicken and thai salad. I just don't understand how people can eat turkey JUST because it is traditional.

Yummy Chickens in Giblet Gravy 282,028 58
11/09/2004 11:21 AM

All hail can shaped sauce!!



Hen is a cook. Martha Stewart-ish presentation and attention to detail. Really. It's that impressive. And everything is all natural. No sugar. She takes sticks and gravel and makes them yummy. You'll want seconds.



That is why, having grown up with fresh cranberry sauce made from real cranberries, she whips out the "cranberry sauce" can EVERY year on turkey day and presents it still in can form lovingly placed on a crystal dish. I look at her with horror and wonder what small brain cancer makes her think this garnet colored tin can shaped glop at all fits with the rest of her awesome spread.



She always mumbles something about family tradition which makes me look at her mother and generally want to slap her for so messing up her daughter as to consider this an acceptible portion of a Thanksgiving table.



It is the world's most processed looking goop. Bleh.

Declan McManus, Daily Prophet Food Columnist, '04 130,657 34
11/09/2004 11:34 AM

You people (evil glance at Chickens) are such dammed cranberry snobs!



I like cranberry sauce jellied. I like it whole berry.



I like the Craig Claiborne/Susan Stamberg frozen cranberries with sour cream and onion.



However, the best!!! cranberry is the raw cranberry/orange relish made in the food processor.



1 bag of cranberries, berries rinsed and sorted and bad ones removed.



1 medium navel orange, peel well rinsed, and cut into eighths. Peel and all, catch any juice.



3/4-1 cup sugar or Splenda

(start with 3/4 cup, and add more, as needed).



1 food processor, fitted with Steel Knife ('S' blade).



Combine cranberries, orange pieces and sugar or Splenda in machine, pulsing until chopped, but not smooth.



Keeps, covered, in fridge for 3-4 days. (or until I finiShakespeare).







Can be made into a very nice cranberry orange ice cream when 2 cups heavy cream is added, and frozen in ice cream freezer.



Fresh cranberries freeze very well in the bag (I like to overwrap the bag with heavy foil) and this cranberry orange relish is delightful in July with barbecued chicken.

Yummy Chickens in Giblet Gravy 282,028 58
11/09/2004 11:43 AM

Keep your evil glances and your beef bone gelatinous cranberry substitute to yourself, missy.

I got Chit to be thankful for 178,088 15
11/09/2004 11:49 AM

I agree wityh Declan, they are two different dishes all together. We always have a condiment similar to what you described Declan, however it has always been passed off as Cranberry Chutney. The jellied or canned cranberry is cool because it is far less of the natural bitterness that a cranberry has, it is easy to apply with a knife, and I liken it to pepper jelly for lamb or pork, (mmmmm)

The other Cranberry dish we have is Cranberry Bread, but it is hardly like a bread, but more like as coffee cake or banna nut bread, but with fresh cranberries baked in and pecans and a glaze etc...

I got Chit to be thankful for 178,088 15
11/09/2004 12:17 PM

Turkey day is a wierd day sometimes for my clan. My Mom, (French) and Pop, (Italian) are divorced, and both remarried, Mom to a Canadian, and Pop, to a Jewish woman. They were discussing how each year my sis and I had to alternate between the two families for holidays, and decided themselves they would do it together. That's not all, we also have a rule, that we all can bring most any orphan, or person without local family if we wish. So every year there are 4-10 n00bs and my two sets of folks getting along famously at least on the surface anyway.

The food always varries as everyone must bring a dish, and anything goes pretty much. We have had Couscous, any pasta you can think of, spinach with bechamel sauce, or (creamed spinach for most), gravloks, a few types of Risotto, Polenta is always good, Gnocchi Al Gorgonzola, even did sushi as a warm up a few times, but always Assloads of wine , (most Italian) deserts and port, grappa, brandy etc... Quite honestly It is really a waste, as most of it gets divided up after, and folks schlep other folks food home as leftovers, cause so many of these dishes could be a meal themselves.

Funny part though, I get a call the following day, usually from each parent, saying how fun it was , yada yada yada, then they both usually ask me some Shakespeare about the other to fill in the gaps from convcersation they picked up on or overheard from the other one . Pretty transparent by now, but I have a good time with it sometimes feeding them total bullShakespeare about the other.

Whistler P. McManus 183,262 42
11/09/2004 12:28 PM

If Hen doesn't use any sugar in her cooking, and uses only natural ingredients, that explains why she doesn't make her own cranberry sauce. You can't do it without sugar. Or a sugar substitute, which wouldn't be natural and would taste lousy and leave a Shakespeare aftertaste in your mouth (sorry, Declan, but it's true).



Sugar rules!

Declan McManus, Daily Prophet Food Columnist, '04 130,657 34
11/09/2004 12:30 PM

Splenda is the closest to real.



I'll send you some.

Saucy Humongous Panda Breasts 181,271 70
11/09/2004 12:32 PM

<action>dons her Sugar Manufacturer tiara and crown</action>



Yeah! What Whistler said!

Saucy Humongous Panda Breasts 181,271 70
11/09/2004 12:33 PM

tiara and crown



Yeah. I have a really big head.

Scarycranberry Pecan Pie 14,124 11
11/09/2004 12:35 PM

My brother always makes his deliciously famous cranberry pecan pie, my mother burns the turnips (2 years running) and we all fight over who makes the best garlic smashed red potatoes. Stuffing, cooked inside the bird is a huge MUST! And I make carrot pineapple cake with cream cheese frosting from scratch... oh, and my brother may be home on leave from Iraq too. That is unless, the whole Fallujah thing is still too intense.

Yummy Chickens in Giblet Gravy 282,028 58
11/09/2004 12:35 PM

What's that green vegitable stuff? Sugar substitute.

Declan McManus, Daily Prophet Food Columnist, '04 130,657 34
11/09/2004 12:35 PM

Is it mushroom shaped, as well?

Yummy Chickens in Giblet Gravy 282,028 58
11/09/2004 12:38 PM

Stevia. That's what she uses. The green granules for sugar dishes and the liquid for sweetening coffee and tea. Good stuff.

TheFoye 55,700 15
11/09/2004 01:01 PM

Thanksgiving of '95 I was homeless so I borrowed some money from a friend and got 3 hotdogs for a dollar at Kwik Trip!





If I had 50 more cents I could of gotten the turkey dogs!

Yummy Chickens in Giblet Gravy 282,028 58
11/09/2004 01:12 PM

And this year you will get plastic turkey served to you by the PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES!



You've come far.

Declan McManus, Daily Prophet Food Columnist, '04 130,657 34
11/09/2004 01:14 PM

That is a terrible reason to enlist!

Dead Robot 67,626 15
11/09/2004 01:15 PM

I think its pretty weird you're eating Tgiving a month late.

TheFoye 55,700 15
11/09/2004 01:15 PM

Chickens, you ever had turkey made by a Pakistani! Yeah it's not as good as a plastic turkey that's for sure!

Whistler P. McManus 183,262 42
11/09/2004 01:51 PM

I'll have to investigate this stevia thing. Splenda you can keep, Declan. I accidentally drank part of a soda sweetened with it and immediately wanted to rip out my tongue.

Jaggylioness, Jane's bitch 11,885 13
11/09/2004 03:27 PM

We had a wonderful turkey (co-produced by Whistler and me)



Delicious gay incestuous turkey sex!

Yummy Chickens in Giblet Gravy 282,028 58
11/09/2004 03:31 PM

Whistler, I make great sweet tea. GREAT. And she's convinced me to switch and use the stevia in it.

Roasted Raccoon 56,688 9
11/09/2004 03:38 PM

My parents-in-law use Stevia.





(I just wanted to add something.)

Saucy Humongous Panda Breasts 181,271 70
11/09/2004 03:47 PM

argue over ..best ..garlic smashed red potatoes



Argue no more. I make the best garlic smashed red potatoes.



Happy to help.

Oliver Turkeybreast 203,450 12
11/09/2004 03:57 PM

WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH NORMAL SUGAR?!



Anyway, I can't have Turkeyday dinner without my Gramma's home made Mac & Cheese.



Best part about Turkeyday is the leftover sammiches. On a couple slices of Potato bread, put a small amount of mayo, and then some cranberry sauce. Add stuffing, mashed potatoes, gravy, and then as much turkey you can fit.



Best sammich ever.

Yummy Chickens in Giblet Gravy 282,028 58
11/09/2004 04:04 PM

Anyway, I can't have Turkeyday dinner without my Gramma's home made Mac & Cheese.



Good news and bad news.



Bad news: your grandma is dead



Good news: it was always from a box

Oliver Turkeybreast 203,450 12
11/09/2004 04:06 PM

BUT I JUST SAW HER LAST WEEKEND!!!



How will I ever figure out her super secret Mac & Cheese recipe now!??!?

Jaggylioness, Jane's bitch 11,885 13
11/09/2004 04:36 PM

I said, Delicious gay incestuous turkey sex!

Scarycranberry Pecan Pie 14,124 11
11/09/2004 04:37 PM

Open Invite to Panda if you're ever in Connecticut:



I will make my version of garlic smashed red potatoes and you will agree that I am Queen of potato cookery.

DemoMarshmallowSalad 166,232 10
11/09/2004 04:41 PM

"Weird Thanksgiving side dishes"



Have you SEEN my name?

paulies gladheateher giblets 272 8
11/09/2004 10:32 PM

Lasagna-- wasn't gross but the Frost-ing Medicans (Pizanics for Americans) thought it was weird