BobJohnson, President of Tralfamadore 178,045 22
12/08/2004 12:03 AM

I did receive a parcel card from Canada Post, though. So I'm thinking maybe they left it there so I could pick it up. (Although, it might be a completely different package).



That's wonderful. If only I had some ID so that Canada Post would give me the package.



Tomorrow I have to borrow some cash from a friend, use the money at a Motor Vehicles Registry to get a new driver's license, use the license at the bank to get a new bank card, use the bank card to pay back the friend. Except it takes them a week to send out the new super-high-security kryptonite driver's licenses. Oh yeah, and then I should pick up the parcel.



This is the most fun I've had since the last time I lost my wallet (although, that time I got to sound all tough by saying, "yeah, I was robbed at knife-point.")



So the purpose of this thread is two-fold:



1. If you're my secret santa and you got the package returned, um, . . . e-mail me?



2. Everyone else, post self-deprecating humour to cheer me up. I already know I'm better and more awesome than all of you, but I'd like to know by how much.

Nerd is Tannenbauming Iraq 27,000 12
12/08/2004 12:05 AM

BOBJOHNSONILOVEYOUMARRYME!!





</human love slave>

Humphrey B Making a List and Checking it Twice 51,764 12
12/08/2004 12:08 AM

I found a wallet the other day. It's awesome.

DemoMonkey. Period. 166,252 10
12/08/2004 12:10 AM

Bob



Someday, future generations of archaeologists will find your wallet and the photo ID contained within.



As a consequence the early 21'st Century will be classified in their history books as "The Age of Awesomeness", and school children will be forced to drink beer from giant martini glasses and wear Hawaiian shirts during the annual Festival of Random Postius.



So it shall be written.



So it shall be done.

Jantastic 10,022 10
12/08/2004 12:15 AM

Print this out and use it to pick up your package. I'm sure they won't notice.

Frogpolar Express 173,153 25
12/08/2004 12:23 AM

now that is awesome.

Feliz Daisypie 49,378 9
12/08/2004 12:25 AM

Why on Earth you do you choose to suffer these petty human inconveniences, Bob?

Codicil D. Birdseed: Creme de la Crud 1,098 8
12/08/2004 12:27 AM

I would just try to lead a normal life, but forget about dancing for a while because all your going to think about is your lost wallet and it's really hard to dance when your not totally focused.

Chickens (no icon) Christmas Green with Envy 286,527 61
12/08/2004 12:35 PM

Prediction: his isp bills one of the cards he just canceled and the email to lost-wallet-boy will go missing during the coming access interruption.

BobJohnson, President of Tralfamadore 178,045 22
12/08/2004 01:46 PM

It turns out that CanPar is the Canadian arm of UPS. . . or something like that.



The building office found the parcel that was left yesterday. It's actually piece 1 (of 2) of my Victim's present.



The Canada Post parcel is either

1) Piece 2 of my Victim's gift;

2) My "Official Ninja" Mug from Hammerhead's CafePress store, or;

3) My secret santa present.



So,



To my Victim: Your present is half here. You might receive it before Christmas!



To my Secret Santa: This thread probably confused you, since you probably haven't even sent my gift yet, right? You lazy, lazy bastard.



To my wallet: Come back.

A cup of Christmas Hammerhead 59,399 14
12/08/2004 03:36 PM

Bob, you're forgetting that it's not just an "Official Ninja Mug", it's the "Special Edition Chi-Chi Felipe Official Ninja Mug". That makes it much more awesome.

Robin 14,626 10
12/08/2004 06:57 PM

I lost my wallet, replaced everything in it, then found the thing under my bed 3 months later.

DemoMonkey. Period. 166,252 10
12/08/2004 11:31 PM

Hear that Bob? It's obvious.



Just go look under Robins' bed in 3 months.