Little White Slave
A comedy article
by Oliver Chest  203,475  12
01/21/2005 12:48 PM 614 views
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For my birthday in September, a friend of mine gave me a $40 gift
certificate to The Castle Super Store, because I am fat and balding, and haven't had actual sex in over a year. The Castle Super Store is a great place to go to fulfill all of your adult fantasy needs. There is over an acre full of adult entertainment. Well lit. Helpful
employees.
It being January, and having my Internet (my normal means of
trans-porn-tation) down for a couple of weeks, I decided to go put my gift certificate to use.
After perusing the warehouse full of porn, I made my choice. The
Redlight District's "Euro Road Trip." Advertised on the back: 6 girls, 12 cum shots, anal, dp's, ATM's, double anal. Some good ol' fashion, wholesome entertainment.
When I got home and opened up the DVD case, I did not find "Euro Road Trip." Instead I was the proud owner of the adult film "Little White Slaves."
The porns I usually like are what people are calling "Reality Porn,"
where there is no plot. They just introduce the girl, the guy gives
her a bit of the ol' mouth plow, and then bangs away. So at first, I was more than a little bit disappointed.
However, it turns out that this one actually has a pretty deep and
meaningful plot.
It's about racism and oppression in our society. It's about the black man standing up for himself. It's about righting the wrongs our ancestors are guilty of. It really puts you in someone else's shoes for a while. Gets you thinking. It would make Martin Luther King Jr. proud.
. . .Or, it's about a bunch of black dudes pounding some petite white girls into the floor, and making them eat all the chocolate flavored manbatter they can swallow. I haven't fully figured it out yet.
I decided to give it a chance. Instead of playing the whole film, I went to the scene selection page. I clicked on a scene titled "Breeders," mainly because the girl was a red head, and had nice big natural boobies.
After watching for a moment, I found out why it was titled "Breeders." I also found out why the girl's boobs were so big. She was pregnant. Probably about 6-7 months. Let me reiterate. She was pregnant. About
6-7 months.
I'm all for the idea of giving my kid a beat down while it is still in the womb. You know, gotta show him who's boss before it starts gettin all uppity. But that's when I get married, and I knock up the ol' lady. I don't know what to think about seeing some random girl give her unborn fetus a concussion. Also, aren't there laws about kids not being involved in porn? I know you can't see the kid, and it's not like the unborn fetus is giving anyone a hummer, but if
those Christian rightwing nuts Pro-lifers think
abortion is wrong because it's an actual person in there, they should get a load of this! Catholic priests would be poppin' open the sacramental wine and tubes of KY!
Anyway, I ended up rubbing a couple out, and I have decided to hold onto this little gem of a movie for a while. Lemme be the first to tell ya, there is nothing like watching a girl have a chocolate log put back into her fudge factory while she gags on a couple of
over sized mocha meat poles, all while her fetus gets to ingest some of the same studbutter that helped it get to where it is today. Rawar.
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Like This? Rate It!
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Hilarious
73 votes
4.7
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40 Comments on "Little White Slave"
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Chris Garrett 86,932  12
01/21/2005 10:36 PM
Burn me a copy?
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HeadlineNews 367 9
01/21/2005 10:37 PM
first to post
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HeadlineNews 367 9
01/21/2005 10:37 PM
damnit.. i shouldnt have waited and read it
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Sideburns Felipe 161,353 14
01/21/2005 10:38 PM
What the? Where did all these line breaks come from? Oliver, you are FIRED from Zugcorp.
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Gabosaurus Rex 9,232 13
01/21/2005 10:46 PM
I read a review that said the camera work in that flick is some of the best ever since All Anal Asian Trannie Sluts Vol. 6.
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The High Priestess of Stewie 58,884 29
01/21/2005 11:26 PM
Ollie, is that the Little White Slaves: Miami, because I think you shouldn't watch that anymore. I know it's very good movie, but I was only a freshmen in college and I needed some money. The guys were very nice and I should just stop stalking now.
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0 votes
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Boots at the Boar 2,305 11
01/22/2005 12:15 AM
Ollie watches preggo porn. Somehow I'm not supprised.
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TableTopJane...look closer 173,958 15
01/22/2005 01:59 AM
Most men watch porn and they want to masturbate.
GAB men watch a porn and they want to masturbate and then go write about it. Or maybe write about it while they masturbate.
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David Moss 4,125 10
01/22/2005 02:13 AM
Actually, GAB men masturbate, write about it, then masturbate to what they wrote using a yellow sock representing the physical manifestation of clickies.
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Producer Poops Oatmeal 7,627 9
01/22/2005 04:35 AM
... i swear i didn't produce that one. or i might have .. lolitas ... mmmmmmm
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Chickens gone cruising Today 286,527 61
01/22/2005 05:26 AM
You had me a choclate flavored manbutter.
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Chickens gone cruising Today 286,527 61
01/22/2005 05:27 AM
And two clicks? This article deserves much more respect.
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Livewire 78,229 13
01/22/2005 05:33 AM
Article clicks make only little wee slivers on the pee bar, not like the thick and ungainly conversation pee. But still, you are correct, this article is underappreciated.
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Roofie Raccoon 56,688 10
01/22/2005 10:40 AM
It currently has 17 clickies. It takes 100 to fill an article, 12 to fill a post.
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Phla Mignon 131,068 34
01/22/2005 11:31 AM
Oh cruel irony, finally putting up the poor guy's article for him to see after he leaves work to go to an interwebless home for the weekend.
Nyar.
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Polo Chukker 4,634 12
01/22/2005 11:34 AM
I think I've read this somewhere before...
I just can't imagine where..
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Dogs Akimbo 211,569 32
01/22/2005 12:15 PM
It currently has 17 clickies. It takes 100 to fill an article, 12 to fill a post.
How do you have this information? I can't even remember the difference between Chickens and Kittuns and you're using math.
There's not going to be test at some point, is there?
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Roofie Raccoon 56,688 10
01/22/2005 01:58 PM
Dogs, if I administered a test, you'd pass.
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MaddMatt -Steely-eyed Warrior/Poet 15,437 9
01/22/2005 02:21 PM
ATM's???? Boy, I am out of the loop.
As for the article as a whole;
Gritty, graphic, visuals that I will need to snort drain cleaner to get out of my head!
In short, I loved it!
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Just Chit till Presidents Day 178,776 15
01/22/2005 04:14 PM
Yea I wondered what the banking machines were doing in there too.
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Just Chit till Presidents Day 178,776 15
01/22/2005 04:29 PM
I enjoyed the article as well, although I don't think I could have endured the pregnant scene, but I'm sure there was plenty for everyone and eventually I would have found something to replace that image with.
Although it doesn't seem to be disappearing to easily at present.
Ohh, and you could have just told us you swapped the discs in the back of the store, we are on your team bud.
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Roofie Raccoon 56,688 10
01/22/2005 07:14 PM
we are on your team bud
Speak for yourself dude. That's some unsexy porn.
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psycho is coming for you 2 8
01/22/2005 07:23 PM
<b>I KILL YOU ALL</b> !!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!I KNOW WHERE YOU LIVE
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Whistler P. McManus 186,021 44
01/22/2005 11:16 PM
Though (as I've stated before) I'm not a porn fan, I DO think that pregnant women are very sexy.
I'm sick like that.
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Oliver Chest 203,475 12
01/23/2005 06:32 PM
Yay! It got approved!
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Oliver Chest 203,475 12
01/24/2005 12:50 PM
Thanks for the kind words folks. I hope you enjoyed reading it, as much as I enjoyed writing about porn.
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Professor Nutbutter 181,311 35
01/24/2005 01:24 PM
I nailed a pregnant chick once.
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Oliver Chest 203,475 12
01/24/2005 02:08 PM
You only had sex wih your wife once in 9 months?
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Professor Nutbutter 181,311 35
01/24/2005 02:09 PM
Pregnancy made her hornier than usual.
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RedstaR I'm not a communist 1,068 8
01/24/2005 02:38 PM
I'm a little behind (no pun intended) in my porn lingo. I need "double anal" and "ATM" defined please.
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Professor Nutbutter 181,311 35
01/24/2005 02:59 PM
ATM = Ass to Mouth. When a penis is moved from the anus to the mouth without a scene cut.
According to porn, there's nothing that gets a woman hotter than sucking off the sweet remnants of her lower intestines.
Unless it's taken from one girl's ass to another's mouth. The ladies just can't get enough of that action.
And women find porn degrading. Feh.
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Oliver Chest 203,475 12
01/24/2005 03:09 PM
What else could double anal mean, other than two dorks in one fudge tunnel?
I guess it could mean a guy is having sex with a girl with two a-holes, or he could be doing two girls at once in the poop schute with both of his penises.
But who really knows?
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RedstaR I'm not a communist 1,068 8
01/24/2005 03:11 PM
Wow! How disgusting erotic. What is "double anal". Also I've heard a few people throw the term "dornknob" around. What's that all about?
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RedstaR I'm not a communist 1,068 8
01/24/2005 03:14 PM
Whoa. I'm learning more than I can bear. How does two of those fit? How do the guys stand? Nevermind I don't want to know.
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Professor Nutbutter 181,311 35
01/24/2005 03:25 PM
There's no possible way double anal could be enjoyable for anybody involved.
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RedstaR I'm not a communist 1,068 8
01/24/2005 03:29 PM
<action>Rolls Eyes</action>
Humans
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Inquisitor Glass 25,340 11
01/24/2005 03:33 PM
Whenever somebody double-anals, I get migraines.
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Dr Apple 450 8
01/24/2005 05:26 PM
There's no possible way double anal could be enjoyable for anybody involved.
I bet Mr. Goatse could handle it.
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Fratberry 282,931 53
06/08/2006 07:37 PM
Oh. The. Horror.
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Shemp, the other Kosher meat 22,222 17
09/20/2006 01:27 PM
Fat Daughter!
This is a fake ass story.
Meh.
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