Spicey McHaggis 117,752 37
02/02/2005 11:56 PM

She's five years old now. I think it's time for new one.

Humphrey© 51,764 12
02/02/2005 11:59 PM

Don't bother with expensive US models. Go for the cheap Asian ones.

PhartSack 13,792 15
02/02/2005 11:59 PM

You stupid Frost-ing piece of Shakespeare, time to sell you and get a new one.

Hammerhead 59,399 14
02/02/2005 11:59 PM

That port is a little loose.

Mr. Briham the Criminally Insane Groundhog 38,843 10
02/03/2005 12:00 AM

Am I doing this right? It doesn't seem to be fitting in the slot.

PhartSack 13,792 15
02/03/2005 12:01 AM

Your scuzzy (scsi) drive has failed again!

Mr. Briham the Criminally Insane Groundhog 38,843 10
02/03/2005 12:02 AM

Way too expensive. I'd rather just stick with my Palm.

Humphrey© 51,764 12
02/03/2005 12:02 AM

"Well it wasn't fitting so I just kinda shoved it in and... well... I think I broke the floppy drive.

daisypie 49,378 9
02/03/2005 12:02 AM

"You really aren't aging well at all"

Mr. Briham the Criminally Insane Groundhog 38,843 10
02/03/2005 12:04 AM

Or:



"Nice thing about my Palm is I can use it when I'm away. I can use it on the airplane or on the bus or even in the middle of class!"

erika the dumbass 76,152 9
02/03/2005 12:04 AM

<action>changes it to things you can say about your computer, but not yourself, since she doesn't have a girlfriend





I was bored, so I just sat around clicking my mouse all night.

Humphrey© 51,764 12
02/03/2005 12:04 AM

I press the right buttons to turn it on but it takes 10 minutes to warm up.

Humphrey© 51,764 12
02/03/2005 12:06 AM

The outside may be old and dirty but she still goes all night.

Mr. Briham the Criminally Insane Groundhog 38,843 10
02/03/2005 12:07 AM

Oh Shakespeare, it's infected with a virus.

erika the dumbass 76,152 9
02/03/2005 12:09 AM

Apparently my euphemism for female masturbation has escaped the understanding of this male dominated thread. I guess I'll go click my mouse in a more female friendly place. Now where'd that hair straightening thread go?

Mr Fook 4,016 9
02/03/2005 12:11 AM

I'll be just right into it and the thing will just Frost-ing turn off on me.

Livewire 78,229 13
02/03/2005 12:15 AM

Hmmm, it's behaving strangely. Maybe I'll just boot it again. That should help.

Livewire 78,229 13
02/03/2005 12:18 AM

I love you.

Humphrey© 51,764 12
02/03/2005 12:19 AM

If I have problems with it not following my commands, I give it a couple of slaps. Doesn't really achieve anything but it's great for relieving stress.

Just Chit till Presidents Day 178,776 15
02/03/2005 12:21 AM

God, seems like whenever I'm with you, time just seems to fly.

daisypie 49,378 9
02/03/2005 12:24 AM

"The MUTE function works great"

who's producing now, bitch?! 7,627 9
02/03/2005 12:24 AM

Wow, look at all the dust in here!

Livewire 78,229 13
02/03/2005 12:25 AM

This.



Okay, that was bad.

Mr Fook 4,016 9
02/03/2005 12:26 AM

Sometimes I can just never get this thing to output; it's always input this, input that.

HisBoyElroy 10,621 13
02/03/2005 12:27 AM

"you crash all the time! what do you need, a Frost-ing driver?!"

HisBoyElroy 10,621 13
02/03/2005 12:27 AM

oh wait, nevermind.

HeadlineNews™® 367 9
02/03/2005 12:31 AM

The CD goes in the CD drive.

who's producing now, bitch?! 7,627 9
02/03/2005 12:32 AM

Abort? Retry? Fail?

Humphrey© 51,764 12
02/03/2005 12:36 AM

I tap this thing all day and get paid for it!

Hammerhead 59,399 14
02/03/2005 12:41 AM

I'm just banging away at it.

HeadlineNews™® 367 9
02/03/2005 12:46 AM

I just pressed the moniter's power button.

DirtyHermit 858 9
02/03/2005 12:46 AM

It has plenty of trojans.

HeadlineNews™® 367 9
02/03/2005 12:47 AM

I spilled coffee on my keyboard again.

Livewire 78,229 13
02/03/2005 12:48 AM

My personal information is secure.

HeadlineNews™® 367 9
02/03/2005 12:49 AM

You have alot of boobs.

REAPERR-FU 12,363 11
02/03/2005 12:50 AM

Wanna cyber?

HeadlineNews™® 367 9
02/03/2005 12:51 AM

I dont think you say that TO your computer.. unless....

DirtyHermit 858 9
02/03/2005 12:54 AM

I have one.

DirtyHermit 858 9
02/03/2005 01:01 AM

It knows what Thunderbird, FireFox and ZIP files are. It also knows the difference between DVD and a CD.



Face it, it can use a computer.

The Mailman: ringing twice, as always 176,450 56
02/03/2005 01:06 AM

I did something wrong, so I just erased her entire memory.

Fratberry 282,931 53
02/03/2005 01:09 AM

Its black.

Nerd, Artist, Cashier, Trash Boy. 27,000 12
02/03/2005 01:10 AM

Racist.

DirtyHermit 858 9
02/03/2005 01:11 AM

OMFG there are worms running around inside it!

DirtyHermit 858 9
02/03/2005 01:13 AM

After mounting 36 times it needs a checkup.

The Mailman: ringing twice, as always 176,450 56
02/03/2005 01:17 AM

I have two. Sometimes I connect them to each other.

BobJohnson, Tiger Trainer Extraordinaire 178,045 22
02/03/2005 01:17 AM

"Sure, set your beer on top of it. It's old; I don't mind."

who's producing now, bitch?! 7,627 9
02/03/2005 01:25 AM

Ehhh, I've had better.

Fratberry 282,931 53
02/03/2005 01:28 AM

It doesn't yell at me when I stare at it while masturbating.

who's producing now, bitch?! 7,627 9
02/03/2005 01:29 AM

I've seen bigger.

Fratberry 282,931 53
02/03/2005 01:30 AM

Psst, its not what your computer says to you.

REAPERR-FU 12,363 11
02/03/2005 01:33 AM

I'm gonna call a tech in to fix your ass.

Just Chit till Presidents Day 178,776 15
02/03/2005 01:35 AM

Frost, does it take you forever to do everything ?

BobJohnson, Tiger Trainer Extraordinaire 178,045 22
02/03/2005 01:45 AM

"I'm going to shove one end of this cord into her butt and the other end into an electrical outlet."







Alright. I quit.

Fluorescent Sombrero 91,274 10
02/03/2005 01:49 AM

"It works much better under the desk."

Hammerhead 59,399 14
02/03/2005 01:57 AM

My hardware is not compatible with that OS.

Frogpop 173,153 25
02/03/2005 01:58 AM

"She's comprised mostly of silicon and metal."

daisypie 49,378 9
02/03/2005 01:59 AM

"She may not look like much, but she's got it where it counts"

The Mofo! 10,950 10
02/03/2005 02:01 AM

If I have nothing better to do, i'll stay on her for hours...

The Mofo! 10,950 10
02/03/2005 02:03 AM

err.. woulda worked better "get on her for a while" but what's done is done...

who's producing now, bitch?! 7,627 9
02/03/2005 02:25 AM

"Which hole does this go in again?"

daisypie 49,378 9
02/03/2005 02:34 AM

My computer sucks...

DirtyHermit 858 9
02/03/2005 02:42 AM

It's a dead badger

DirtyHermit 858 9
02/03/2005 02:45 AM

They're the same thing.

Humphrey© 51,764 12
02/03/2005 02:47 AM

It's flat in the front and the rear is a mess.

DirtyHermit 858 9
02/03/2005 02:55 AM

It doesn't make a sound when it's locked in the trunk of my car.

Frogpop 173,153 25
02/03/2005 02:57 AM

"It spends all month not bleeding."

Napkin's Ütérus 30,762 12
02/03/2005 03:05 AM

It sits on my lap.

marmaboy 505 9
02/03/2005 03:18 AM

You know I want it, girl I gotsta have it, Oooh I need it, baby come-on feed it, gimme, gimme, gimme, honey do the shimmy, girl you gotta please me, quit playin' baby feed me, whoose lookin' kind drab sugar I need ggggggggaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaBBBB!!!

marmaboy 505 9
02/03/2005 03:20 AM

Whoa.



...I had to get that out of my system. Hey wait a minute...

marmaboy 505 9
02/03/2005 03:21 AM

New entry:



I'll bet you're glad you got that out of your system!

Just Chit till Presidents Day 178,776 15
02/03/2005 03:24 AM

It can multitask, four, five, sometimes twelve different things at once.

Rаt in a hat 2,085 9
02/03/2005 09:08 AM

She may look slow, but she does everything I need her to.

Rаt in a hat 2,085 9
02/03/2005 09:11 AM

The bigger one runs faster then the smaller one.

ThelaHunGinjeet 22 9
02/03/2005 09:31 AM

Stop whining! Be quiet or I will hit you again.

turtle10 42,578 26
02/03/2005 09:35 AM

I use it just for work

DemoMonkey. Period. 166,252 10
02/03/2005 10:33 AM

"I'm going to put my penis in you now."



...



I'm not sure I got that right.



...



Actually, I did.

Spicey McHaggis 117,752 37
02/03/2005 03:54 PM

She doesn't do Windows.

Chickens Come Home Mon 286,527 61
02/03/2005 04:48 PM

Ctrl, Alt, Delete is one hell of a lot less expensive than Ctrl, Alt, Divorce.

MaddMatt -Steely-eyed Warrior/Poet 15,437 9
02/03/2005 05:02 PM

"If you keep moving this slow, I'm going to reconfigure your drives"!

Fratberry 282,931 53
02/03/2005 05:04 PM

Its been under my desk all day and hasn't given me a blowjob yet.

Fratberry 282,931 53
02/03/2005 05:05 PM

Actually, that applies in both cases.

Fluro 14,139 11
02/03/2005 06:40 PM

I let my friends use it all the time.

Stozman3 7 9
02/03/2005 10:31 PM

A new girl every night

AussieSarah-feeding babys to dingos for a low$1.99 8,390 9
02/04/2005 12:51 AM

I don't know how i'd cope without a computer

daisypie 49,378 9
02/04/2005 01:04 AM

I don't know who you are or where you've come from, but from now on you'll do as I say.

Sylvester 4,465 9
02/04/2005 04:43 AM

Hey you didn't complain last night when you received that 9 inch hard drive.

Just Chit till Presidents Day 178,776 15
02/04/2005 04:59 AM

Ohh yea, once a day easily,

sometimes it will take two three dumps a day even.

DirtyHermit 858 9
02/04/2005 08:33 PM

It's fun to plug stuff in to its holes everyday.

Potrzebie 1,790 9
02/25/2005 05:23 AM

I pay some guy money, and he gives me one.

Megatron 3,360 9
02/25/2005 05:39 AM

Never get a warning Does this case make my but look big?

QksilverGirl 110 9
02/25/2005 07:15 AM

Sometimes ya gotta blow really hard to get it clean.

Sylvester 4,465 9
02/26/2005 03:33 AM

You can always erase a bad memory.

Rusty Shakelford 26 6
05/15/2008 08:46 PM

Sometimes I just want to throw your out the window.

Snappahed 943 8
05/15/2008 09:06 PM

I love playing with you. Even in front of strangers!

CyberSanta 917 8
12/17/2009 08:32 PM

Let go of my floppy.