Oh Shakespeare...
A comedy conversation
by Jajoba  1,357  10
03/10/2005 09:06 AM 272 views
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Dave Matthews Band Driver Pleads Guilty
A bus driver for the Dave Matthews Band has pleaded guilty to dumping 800 pounds of human waste onto a sightseeing boat on Illinois' Chicago River. Earlier Thursday, Stefan Wohl was sentenced to 18 months probation and 150 hours of community service. He was also fined the maximum of $10,000, which will be paid to Friends Of The Chicago River, a conservation group. Wohl, 42, was charged with reckless conduct and discharging contaminates to cause water pollution. Authorities said that on August 8, when Wohl was alone in a bus used by band violinist Boyd Tinsley, he emptied the septic tank while driving across the open grating deck of the Kinzie Street bridge. The waste poured onto the open deck of the Chicago's Little Lady tour boat, which was passing below with more than 100 passengers. Prosecutors said Wohl had denied discharging waste on the bridge, but surveillance tapes from buildings in the area were used to zero in on the bus. The band's members, who cooperated with authorities during the investigation, since donated $50,000 to the Friends of the Chicago River and $50,000 to the Chicago Park District.
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Like This? Rate It!
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Hilarious
3 votes
4.0
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Side-splitting
9 votes
5.0
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Dave Matthews Band Driver 282,931  53
03/10/2005 09:12 AM
"Heh, that'll teach 'em to call me a tree huggin' hippie."
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Hilarious
2 votes
4.0
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Bonky 75,733 15
03/10/2005 09:33 AM
He can still hug trees . . . but he may poop on them while he's at it.
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Side-splitting
18 votes
5.0
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Megatron 3,360 9
03/10/2005 09:35 AM
They didn't mention that he got 500 cool points for actually hitting the boat
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Funny
1 votes
3.0
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Clint McPants 19,555 11
03/10/2005 09:44 AM
To think of how many casualties would have been spared and how much funnier it would have been if this technique would have been adopted by the air forces of the world.
- Oh no Harry, German bombers!
- Not to worry dear, I've got the umbrella ready.
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0 votes
0.0
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Fratberry 282,931 53
03/10/2005 09:46 AM
To me the most disturbing thing about the entire story is that a fiddle player for a jam band has his OWN BUS. Pretentious li'l Froster.
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Chuckleworthy
2 votes
2.5
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Clint McPants 19,555 11
03/10/2005 09:50 AM
To me the most disturbing thing about the entire story is that a fiddle player for a jam band has his OWN BUS. Pretentious li'l Froster.
Perhaps the bus was a really crappy one?
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Hilarious
4 votes
4.5
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Frogpop 173,153 25
03/10/2005 09:54 AM
geez.. 40 years of civil rights struggles and the black guy wanted his own bus ALL ALONG! What a waste of time.
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0 votes
0.0
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Fratberry 282,931 53
03/10/2005 09:59 AM
He's black??? Well nevermind then.
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Hilarious
5 votes
4.5
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Livewire 78,229 13
03/10/2005 10:25 AM
The fact that the sewage release can be operated by the driver while the bus is in motion is cool beyond words. James Bond, eat your heart out!
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Side-splitting
7 votes
5.0
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Fratberry 282,931 53
03/10/2005 10:28 AM
He'd have probably been forgiven if, after unloading, he just yelled out the window, "Shakespeareter was full! Merry Christmas!".
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0 votes
0.0
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Lunchbox de la Coq 14,650 10
03/10/2005 10:31 AM
Eight. Hundred. Pounds?
I thought I was full of Shakespeare.
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0 votes
0.0
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Clint McPants 19,555 11
03/10/2005 10:53 AM
Eight. Hundred. Pounds?
I thought I was full of Shakespeare.
C'mon, don't feel bad. You probably deposit more often than the bus does.
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Hilarious
5 votes
4.5
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Fratberry 282,931 53
03/10/2005 10:56 AM
Its also more packed in than the bus.
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Side-splitting
12 votes
5.0
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Lord Humongous, Ruler of the Wastelands 161,353 14
03/10/2005 10:58 AM
The story doesn't mention that later on, Dave Matthews showered people in Shakespeare for two hours. It was called a "concert."
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Chuckleworthy
1 votes
2.0
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Pubah, Just Incurable 56,805 18
03/10/2005 04:44 PM
Poop on Riverboats
I can't wait for the Nintendo 64 version.
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