Sir Nigel Peppermont 95 8
04/17/2005 05:31 PM

Some people often look back at me with dis-belief when i say there is far too much porn readily availible. Perhaps it's my young age.



But searching for fansites on James Bond. You type in bond, you get back a crazy bald Japanese guy with a fetish on tying up women with rope. Ok, not too bad you might think, but when your 4 nephews are gathered round the computer eager to see some James Bond pics, they start to ask questions. Especially when they can't remember seeing 'that' woman in any of the films.

The Pulchritudinous Napkin 30,762 12
04/17/2005 06:14 PM

Yeah! I was on the computer last night and I typed in "HOT ANAL SEX XXX" and I got a website for calescent anal-retentive genders who had an obsession for Vin Diesel.

Covergirl 33 8
04/17/2005 06:18 PM

I was searching the other day for different kinds of flowers that I could put on my balcony and sure enough, there was the porn. And I mean everytime you click on one of their pages, 20 more pop up! You just can't get rid of it

jclast 1,443 8
04/17/2005 06:19 PM

You wouldn't have this problem if didn't word you search like this:

flowers balcony sexy nude celebs

Covergirl 33 8
04/17/2005 06:23 PM

Why is it when I look for porn I can never find it when I type in something dirty. But when all I want is a picture of a damned Poe(cat) I find all of these naughty things!?!

jclast 1,443 8
04/17/2005 06:26 PM

In this case you've left off the 'sexy nude celebs.' It's hard, but I know that you can figure this out.

Chit Eating Grin 178,776 15
04/17/2005 06:31 PM

You just tell them that she was from a real early James Bond movie titled,



"For Your Good Eye Only"



or



"Coldfinger"

Covergirl 33 8
04/17/2005 06:37 PM

Sorry I meant Sexy Nude Celebs Poecat Pics! I always think those pics are so cute

millie 116,988 28
04/18/2005 12:05 AM

My dad was at lunch, too, and wanted to know what we were talking about. We couldn't really explain, nor did we want to, since we were eating at the time.



And, really, how does one explain Tubgirl?

Tabula Rasa, teacher fetishist extraordinaire 14,056 9
04/18/2005 12:16 AM

Her father didn't pay enough attention to her.

Dweezil S Meniketti [Electric Hoedown] 77,546 17
04/18/2005 12:22 AM

And, really, how does one explain Tubgirl?





Show him the link?

Declan 'Velvet Jones' McManus 131,874 36
04/18/2005 12:49 AM

Maybe they are afraid that if they show Daddy Tubgirl's picture, he'll have a stroke

















or six.

Delightful Delirium 296 9
04/18/2005 07:45 AM

Shudder. You stare the first time and then gloss over the repeats. I think she was dead and they just removed the plug a split second before the shot. Notice her pasty skin?







Doesn't help does it?

millie 116,988 28
04/18/2005 01:42 PM

My dad has a bad heart and I'm not going to take the risk.



I still feel guilty about that time I lied and said he was in the hospital just so I could take a couple days off work. I was convinced he'd have a heart attack for real that time.



So, I don't want to do anything to put him at risk.

gorckat 41,132 13
04/18/2005 01:47 PM

I had a friend who called out of Burger King and hung out at my house after school one night saying his grandfather was in the hospital.



His mother spent several hours trying to find him to take him to the hospital because his grandfather really did have a heart attack. Watching the color drain out of his face was priceless.

DemoMonkey. Period. 166,252 10
04/18/2005 01:55 PM

Too much porn on the internet?



If only someone would write an article about that.



Nah. That would never work.

Jopeck 395 8
04/18/2005 05:20 PM

You just can't get rid of it



Thats a damn shame.

Jaggy, rusty DAGGAH OF DEATH 11,895 13
10/16/2005 05:04 AM

Years ago, on Coro St, Judy and Gary had twins.



They got really pissed off with everyone suggesting twin/christmas names, like Mary and Joseph, Noel and Carol etc.



So they decided to name one each, completely independantly, and were happy to find that the chosen names, William and Rebecca, were nothing like each other.



They were upset to realise everyone automatically went, "aw, that's so cute! Billy and Becky!"



Then Judy died in a car crash.



The end.

*snuffle snuffle*...I am no n00b! I am Neep! Roar! 35,066 15
10/16/2005 05:11 AM

The only time I have ever described it was when I was working at KFC. I picked up the honey mustard bottle and said "imagine topping this up with water, shaking it, then squeezing really hard." They got the picture.

Gutted Dogs Akimbo 211,569 32
10/16/2005 10:42 AM

<action>hands Neep a whole chicken</action>Oooh, oooh! Do goatse man now!

McPants - The Shape of Punk to Come 19,555 11
10/16/2005 10:47 AM

Do goatse man now!



Judging by the state of his posterior, I'd say he's already been "done" by one of the larger men on the planet.

Millie has fun-size snickers 116,988 28
10/16/2005 09:35 PM

So they decided to name one each, completely independantly, and were happy to find that the chosen names, William and Rebecca, were nothing like each other.



My mother was determined to not name us with cute twins names, as well. My brother's name was already picked out, since my uncle, William, had recently died.



They weren't sure if the other baby was going to be a girl or a boy. They knew there was at least one boy since the doctor made my mother have an x-ray a week before our birth (usually a no-no, but he apparently was curious to find out if she was pregnant for twins, triplets or an elephant, since we were both over seven pounds.)



They hadn't picked out a name for me, so when I came out, first, my dad was so excited he asked the doctor what his mother's name was. Her name was Rebecca.



My mother was passed out and didn't care, although she had wanted to name me Judith.



She didn't think they sounded like twin-type names, until people said the same thing, "Oh, how cute! Billy and Becky!"

Millie with mashed potatoes and gravy 116,988 28
11/22/2005 12:13 AM

Bumpy.

Nathyn: have you seen this, six inch penis? 0 0
11/22/2005 12:16 AM

Bumpy.



That's how I like it Millie.

Millie with mashed potatoes and gravy 116,988 28
11/22/2005 12:17 AM

Why must you pester me?

Nathyn: have you seen this, six inch penis? 0 0
11/22/2005 12:19 AM

Sorry, I'm just looking for some clickies.



Although I must admit you're sadly the hottest chick on GAB no matter what age.

Millie with mashed potatoes and gravy 116,988 28
11/22/2005 12:20 AM

Sadly? What the Frost is that supposed to mean?

Nathyn: have you seen this, six inch penis? 0 0
11/22/2005 12:21 AM

That you're hott, but it's sad the younger chicks aren't.

Nathyn: have you seen this, six inch penis? 0 0
11/22/2005 12:22 AM

You don't make me sad though, you make me feel all warm inside.

Nathyn: have you seen this, six inch penis? 0 0
11/22/2005 12:22 AM

warm and fuzzy



















fuuuzzzzzzzzy

Nathyn: have you seen this, six inch penis? 0 0
11/22/2005 12:24 AM

Okay, I'm done.

Millie 116,988 28
05/10/2006 09:05 AM

I'm bumping this to push some stuff off the board. I looked at my five funniest posts, and this seemed the only one worthy of bumping.



The top one was a stupid post that I only got clickies because of a trick. The other two have pictures of me and I don't feel like whoring pics of myself. The other one makes no sense, now that only Gork is on the G page.



Even though this one contains an idiot at the end, the beginning is funny.