Putting Things Into Perspective.
A comedy conversation
by Chris Garrett  86,932  12
04/24/2005 04:53 PM 306 views
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I haven't been around for a few days, due to the fact that my computer is currently out of comission, and will be for at least another week, plus I have been busy since my wife's mother died on Saturday morning.
Friday evening, I am trying to explain to my 6 year old, that we have to go visit his grandmother, because she is probably going to die, and we need to go say goodbye.
So, I try my best to explain death to a 6-year old, and tell him, that it's ok, she's better off, she'll be around in your heart, and that it was ok to feel sad.
At that moment, he got the glummest look on his face, so I said, "If you have any questions, or if you need anything, just ask."
At this point, he began to get a little weepy, and I figured the impact of his grandmother dying waShakespeare-ing him, when he looks up at me, and says,
"Well, I COULD really use a CD player with headphones."
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Like This? Rate It!
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Side-splitting
31 votes
5.0
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Hilarious
4 votes
4.0
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Clint McPants - A pawn in game of life 19,555  11
04/24/2005 05:00 PM
A few years in a Gulag penal colony should teach his materialistic ass what's important. In Russia the CD plays you!
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Side-splitting
20 votes
5.0
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MaddMatt -Steely-eyed Warrior/Poet 15,437 9
04/24/2005 05:09 PM
Aren't kids great! This was my kids reality check to me;
My wife and I were going through a seperation, and were agonizing over how to tell the kids that Mommy was going to move out. We finally sat them down and explained in the most delicate way we could. Their first question?
"Hey Mom, can you get a place with a swimming pool?
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Hilarious
7 votes
4.4
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The High Priestess of Steaks 58,884 29
04/24/2005 05:49 PM
Chris, I think your son and Janes' daughter should be on Gab. And that they should date. Start him early on the womens.
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Hilarious
6 votes
4.4
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Suicide Ranger 27,937 12
04/24/2005 05:57 PM
Yeah, that way he will learn that all women are insane at a young age. Then he will know it is much better off becoming a male stripper. Where the women are drunk and throw money at you. Then leave and you never have to hear them talk about anything, EVER!
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Hilarious
7 votes
4.4
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Livewire 78,229 13
04/24/2005 08:34 PM
That's pretty cute.
Err, I mean "Screw you and your kid stories! Make with the poop jokes!"
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0 votes
0.0
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jclast 1,443 8
04/24/2005 08:36 PM
POOP!
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Side-splitting
26 votes
5.0
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Space Admiral BobJohnson 178,045 22
04/24/2005 09:15 PM
My mom saved everything of mine from when I was a child. ("Lock of hair, age 7." I'm serious.)
I found one letter I had written to my grandmother who was in the hospital with a very serious illness.
It went something like this:
Dear Grandma,
Get well soon!
If you decide to get me Where in Time is Carmen Sandiego, make sure it's IBM compatible.
Love,
Bob
I was 11 or 12 at the time, so I really have no excuse.
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Hilarious
7 votes
4.4
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Chit Eating Grin 178,776 15
04/24/2005 09:53 PM
P.S. Grandma, my mom says if you are going to do it, you better do it pretty damn quick too.
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Hilarious
4 votes
4.2
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Lamburger 33,017 9
04/24/2005 10:40 PM
Here's to hoping CG's daughter isn't an emotional eater.
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Hilarious
11 votes
4.9
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Pope Chickens the Fruitful 286,527 61
04/25/2005 01:48 AM
My grandma died this weekend, and all I got was ....
THIS WICKED COOL CD WALKMAN! ROCKON!
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0 votes
0.0
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Frogpop 173,153 25
04/25/2005 01:52 AM
Yeah, she's far to young to be aroungry.
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0 votes
0.0
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Robin® 14,626 10
04/25/2005 02:00 AM
I never could decide which was worse: Emotional eating, gaining 5 pounds over night, or binge eating and purging.
I've always been emetophobic, so my choice was forced.
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Hilarious
4 votes
4.2
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Napkin & Napalm 30,762 12
04/25/2005 03:07 AM
Haha! You're afraid of Emetos!
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0 votes
0.0
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Zaphod Beeblebrox 31,599 13
04/25/2005 03:42 AM
Sticking your finger down your throat doesn't make you throw up.
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