TEDphat 6,408 9
07/06/2005 10:05 AM

Personally, I have no problem with Jews.

Professor Nutbutter 181,311 35
07/06/2005 10:05 AM

Word.



The cheapskate tends to put in the exact amount of his dinner without considering tax and tip.



"My sub was $4.95. Here's a five, don't worry about the change."

BlaiseMilla 67,037 13
07/06/2005 10:06 AM

I've got to disagree with you on the counter. I can't stand it when my wife and I go out and some other guy at the table is ordering pints of Bass,Johnny Walker Blue, surf and turf, dessert and then he's like "OK, $20 each" No- Frost YOU. I'm not footing the bill for your freaking $50 tab while mine is $21. Suck it- break out your money high roller and put it on the table.

Big Irish Guy 203,956 21
07/06/2005 10:07 AM

But I just had a salad.









































Bwahahahaha...like that ever happend.

Trixxiewan Kenobie 65,026 15
07/06/2005 10:19 AM

When ever we had big work lunches and the restaurant wouldn't split the check we always came up short. One time my car was in the shop and I hitched a ride with the creepy guy at work. When we get to the everybody's finished phase of the meal. He tells me we have to go. I get to the car and realized I didn't give anybody money for my meal. I walk back up to the table and make a huge production out of Hey we are leaving early here is "our" money. He gives his money and glares at me. JErk

Big Irish Guy 203,956 21
07/06/2005 10:21 AM

You were upset he didn't call 30 minute rule, aren't you?

The Mailman: ringing twice, as always 176,450 56
07/06/2005 10:24 AM

"OK, $20 each" No- Frost YOU. I'm not footing the bill for your freaking $50 tab while mine is $21.



If his bill is $50, and yours is $21, and each one leaves $20, you'd better all be wearing good running shoes when you leave the restaurant.

Trixxiewan Kenobie 65,026 15
07/06/2005 10:27 AM

You were upset he didn't call 30 minute rule, aren't you?



I just threw-up a little in my mouth

REAPERR-FU 12,363 11
07/06/2005 10:28 AM

Avoid it all. Make the damn waitress work and give you all seperate checks.

I am Straw 97,995 37
07/06/2005 10:29 AM

Whenever I went on business trips with my fellow auditors, and we went out for a meal, it always cracked me up that we could never get the amount right. We always either put in too much or too little.

Bonky 75,733 15
07/06/2005 10:31 AM

It's the Frostchops that order all of the extra crap because they know we're splitting the bill that piss me off.



I once joined a group of friends late. They had already eaten. I had one margarita and the bill comes around. This was at the Cheesecake Fattery and these honkies had dinner, appetisers, drinks, etc., so the bill was about $150. Frost THAT NONSENSE! When I threw in a ten (okay, I was generous because the waiter was a hottie), I get the look. I held up my margarita glass to the friend of a friend donning said look and she squirmed a bit, licked the ketchup off of her plate and fished around in her purse some more.

That's when I noticed just how many plates of appetizers (that were to have been passed around) were planted warm and snug in their beds in front of her fat face!



That's also when I remembered that I don't like going out with this group of girlie girls.





This is when you all remembered why you don't read my posts. Because I yammer. I yammer a lot. When I'm in one of those moods, boy howdy you can't stop me from a good yammering.



Now, my wrist hurts.

REAPERR-FU 12,363 11
07/06/2005 10:31 AM

Oh and you can send a few receipts this way. I need some tax deductions.

Professor Nutbutter 181,311 35
07/06/2005 10:31 AM

Bistromath

Professor Nutbutter 181,311 35
07/06/2005 10:35 AM

I miss you, Bonky.

Spicy-Sweet Lamb Tagine with Saffron Couscous 33,017 9
07/06/2005 10:40 AM

I went to a baby shower luncheon and got there almost an hour late because I was running late and then got lost. It was one of those family restaurants where the portions are huge and it takes four people to eat an entire entre.



Well, by the time I got there, the food was nearly all gone, and what was left was cold. I told them I wasn't really hungry anyway but they insisted I have some. So I have a half plate of cold leftovers and order a water.



The bill comes and someone has the bright idea of splitting the whole check equally. I didn't think that was fair then or now. But I didn't want to be rude...so I paid.

Ditdah, sick of counting 123,110 14
07/06/2005 10:44 AM

Al, you didn't start all this crap just because I said you should pay for my lunch did you? Cause I was just joking you crazy nutcase.



I just expect you to buy me a drink. Along with every other person I tell to.

Roofie Raccoon 56,688 10
07/06/2005 10:46 AM

Lambie, you might not want to be rude and just fork over the cash but I won't. If there's more than a reasonable difference in the amount I'll raise holy hell. $5 more than what my share is? Not a problem. $20 more than my share? Frost the lot of you.

Ditdah, sick of counting 123,110 14
07/06/2005 10:51 AM

Frost the lot of you.



Yes, please.

Phuc 237,919 21
07/06/2005 10:53 AM

No, Dit, no. I was doing the database thing and started thinking about all these people and who among them are offenders.



Seems like what we got more of here are those weenies who order less and still don't pay for what they've got and try to get away with stiffing their friends.



You will all burn in hell. Hell, I tells ya!

default_user - Tralfamadorian Opposition Party 12,538 15
07/06/2005 10:54 AM

I've got to disagree with you on the counter. I can't stand it when my wife and I go out and some other guy at the table is ordering pints of Bass,Johnny Walker Blue, surf and turf, dessert and then he's like "OK, $20 each" No- Frost YOU. I'm not footing the bill for your freaking $50 tab while mine is $21. Suck it- break out your money high roller and put it on the table.



$20 each? And you ate $21 worth of food?

You must have graduated from the "Dur Skool of '+'ing"...

REAPERR-FU 12,363 11
07/06/2005 10:58 AM

What happen to the men just assuming it is their responsibilty to pay? All the times in the past when I have been out the women never opened their wallets or mouths(about the bill). The men either had agreed to a deal about paying or a couple,of the men, would go to the regester and pay.





But to ask the women to pay?

Never.

Phuc 237,919 21
07/06/2005 10:58 AM

Anyway, I wanted to get an idea for what it will be like going out on the town with you wiggaz.



Before I enter a bar with any of youse, I want to know if there are a bunch who are going to be super-picky about the check, because I'm usually the schmuck who ends up paying that $40 more and I ain't doing it again. I'm underpaid as it is.





Of course, the best bet is to get the Irish drunk on rotgut and pick their pockets.

Big Irish Guy 203,956 21
07/06/2005 11:01 AM

Settle down Al, I paid my share when I was in Boston last week.

Roofie Raccoon 56,688 10
07/06/2005 11:03 AM

At bars, I normally just carry my ID and a credit card and start a tab, but no way in hell with you lushes. I'd better find a small purse and bring fat stacks of cash.



(The ID is because my CC's say "see ID" on the sig line not because I expect to get carded at my age.)

Phuc 237,919 21
07/06/2005 11:08 AM

Well then, BIG, you're obviously not Boston Irish.

Duuuuh - 5 Months Pregnant 24,152 8
07/06/2005 11:08 AM

(The ID is because my CC's say "see ID" on the sig line not because I expect to get carded at my age.)



Of course they're still going to card you when you're 25.











































</suckup>

Spicey McHaggis 117,760 37
07/06/2005 11:12 AM

(The ID is because my CC's say "see ID" on the sig line not because I expect to get carded at my age.)



Because we all know that works so well.

Big Irish Guy 203,956 21
07/06/2005 11:13 AM

Al, I don't know if I have ever mentioned that I am from New Jersey.

erika the killjoy 76,152 9
07/06/2005 11:14 AM

Hold on a second...people actually have to pay for drinks at bars? I've always thought they were free.

Roofie Raccoon 56,688 10
07/06/2005 11:15 AM

You're right, Spicey, most people don't check if but if half do then I have a 50% better chance of not having that kind of identity theft. Small wins are still wins.

daisypie 49,378 9
07/06/2005 11:51 AM

<action>whispers so everyone but Al can hear...</action>So, we're all in for the ZUG-10 prank, 'Al gets stuck with the check', right?

Dead Robot 67,630 16
07/06/2005 11:55 AM

Americans discussing fair tipping practices is like China bragging about their spotless human rights record.

Professor Nutbutter 181,311 35
07/06/2005 11:58 AM

Or Canada bragging about SHUT UP!

Spicey McHaggis 117,760 37
07/06/2005 12:03 PM

Roofie, I've read Dr. Hargrave's research papers on the matter. No one checks the signature. No one.

Trixxiewan Kenobie 65,026 15
07/06/2005 12:20 PM

Relax Al, I've taken out a second morgage and extra health insurance in prepartion for Boston's food and drink prices.

Trixxiewan Kenobie 65,026 15
07/06/2005 12:21 PM

In the 2005/06 Louisiana Travel Guide Boston has been upgrade from a Tier IV city to HAHAHA Like We are going to Pay for you to go THERE.

MiLLie 116,988 28
07/06/2005 12:33 PM

Reaper, since most of the times when I go out with a bunch of people it is all women, there isn't much chance of sticking a guy with the bill.



Last time we did have men in the group, one paid way more than his share (he was on an expense account) and the other guy there started bitching about how much he was paying, even though he was drinking from the pitchers of beer freely and eating all the appitizers that other people ordered.



I am usually the one who throws in money to cover the gap.



Splitting it evenly may not be fair to everyone, but it always seems like when everyone throws in money for what they got plus a tip, it's still short. Either people are bad at math or there are some real sleazebags. I prefer to think it's the second choice, since I'm so jaded.

KakeSpecial 55,555 14
07/06/2005 12:36 PM

People who have to ask for seperate checks have no business in our society. Just split the Frost-ing thing evenly.







</guy who drinks more booze than anyone>

Coco 1,756 8
07/06/2005 12:38 PM

I've had an awful experience with cheapskates. We were at a restaurant, I turned up a bit late with my credit card because I couldn't get money out of my account on the way there.



When the bill came, I said I'd put it on my card if everyone gave me their share of the money. Suddenly they hadn't turned up with enough money (how the Frost were they going to pay if I hadn't turned up!?). They told me this after I put my card down on the check.



Once I started calling for the money, most people started paying back, but one cheapskate decided not to pay me, because drugs are more important to her.



I looked away for a second, and she's running off to the toilet. Ten minutes later, I'm still waiting for her to come out. I leave the restaurant, ready to stalk her. I ask her for it out of the restaurant once she cautiously comes outside and she runs off.



She's been 'broke' ever since, despite going on holidays and being almost permanently high. Bitch.



She's also one of those girls who tells you what she'd spend on your birthday present to guide how much you should spend on hers. Then when your birthday comes round, she's completely broke. I'm glad I'll never see her again.



Anyway, meet someone like this and run. Fast. (Like she did, grumble grumble)

</rant>

Coco 1,756 8
07/06/2005 12:39 PM

I've had an awful experience with cheapskates. We were at a restaurant, I turned up a bit late with my credit card because I couldn't get money out of my account on the way there.



When the bill came, I said I'd put it on my card if everyone gave me their share of the money. Suddenly they hadn't turned up with enough money (how the Frost were they going to pay if I hadn't turned up!?). They told me this after I put my card down on the check.



Once I started calling for the money, most people started paying back, but one cheapskate decided not to pay me, because drugs are more important to her. She also had the most drinks out of the group, and had the most expensive share of the check.



I looked away for a second, and she's running off to the toilet. Ten minutes later, I'm still waiting for her to come out. I leave the restaurant, ready to stalk her. I ask her for it out of the restaurant once she cautiously comes outside and she runs off.



She's been 'broke' ever since, despite going on holidays and being almost permanently high. Bitch.



She's also one of those girls who tells you what she'd spend on your birthday present to guide how much you should spend on hers. Then when your birthday comes round, she's completely broke. I'm glad I'll never see her again.



Anyway, meet someone like this and run. Fast. (Like she did, grumble grumble)

</rant>

Coco 1,756 8
07/06/2005 12:45 PM

Sorry about that. I swear I clicked 'preview' the first time.

Ditdah, sick of counting 123,110 14
07/06/2005 12:53 PM

I won't be the one bitching about the bill. As long as there are soem ATM's somewhere, cause I'm not bringing hundereds of dollars of cash to this thing.

Not with Spicey in my room - no way.

Prof. Fantabulous 19,711 13
07/06/2005 12:56 PM

A Warning to all Cheese Cakes:



I am going to eat the whole lot of you.

Except you Raspberry, you are free to go.

Mr. Sir 66,722 9
07/06/2005 01:05 PM

These look like some cheap skates.





>*<

Freeze Dried Instant Coffee 10,327 12
07/06/2005 01:10 PM

I have no problem paying my share for stuff, tax and tip included. I am also not above paying more than my share in order to make sure the bill is paid. However, (see Roofie's comment above).

Underwhere? 101,398 77
07/06/2005 04:11 PM

I always get stuck with the bill. Especially with my sister - she'll bring her kids along, order them each a separate adult sized meal, bitch about how bad the food is (after eating almost all of it) and then complain that the waitress is rude. Then, oh the baby is cranky, so she has to leave before the check gets there. She'll get the entire entree that her kids didn't even touch boxed up to go, give me what she *thinks* the bill is worth and then leave no tip at all. So I end up $50 short and have to cover the entire tip.



I Frost-ing hate my sister.



Thanks Phuc.

Trixxiewan Kenobie 65,026 15
07/06/2005 05:16 PM

apparently, I am willing to pay if someone is willing to pretend to be my friend.

KakeSpecial 55,555 14
07/06/2005 05:27 PM

apparently, I am willing to pay if someone is willing to pretend to be my friend.



I can pretend to be queer for beer, trix. But I have limits. NO ANAL!!!







Well, ok, but it has to be premium imported. And I'm prolly going to need shots. (Both of alcohol and vaccinations)

Bonky 75,733 15
07/06/2005 05:34 PM

If I were going to join this festivity of frolicosity, I'd bring eleven dollars in pennies and some beans, probably lima beans.

Roofie Raccoon 56,688 10
07/06/2005 05:38 PM

Bonky, I'd accept your pennies and plant your beans. That's how much we'd like you to be there.

Big Irish Guy 203,956 21
07/06/2005 05:39 PM

Are Bonkey and Phla the same person?

Roofie Raccoon 56,688 10
07/06/2005 05:50 PM

No, but they are both deeply random and greatly liked.

OneEyedTrouserTrout 6,046 8
07/06/2005 05:54 PM

And you call yourselves pranksters. Get even for Frost sake. Invite the cheapass(es) out for a nice dinner. Make them assume you intend to pick up the tab. Order lobster, top shelf booze, etc. Then skip out just before the $10.00 dessert you and the double shot of Gran Marnier you ordered arrives. Bonus points if you drove and leave them stranded.

Bonky 75,733 15
07/06/2005 06:18 PM

And neither of us have "e" in our names!

Big Irish Guy 203,956 21
07/06/2005 06:20 PM

<action>looks for edit button, can't find one</action>

Sylvester 4,465 9
07/06/2005 11:31 PM

<action>proud to admit to never picking up a dinner check even if his life depends on it</action>



One of my old friends asked me what bloodlines I had. I mentioned that I had Scot and German blood running through me.



"That's why you're such a cheap kraut."































I have a new set of friends now.

newwave 45,912 10
07/07/2005 04:43 AM

And you call yourselves pranksters.



No, John Hargrave calls himself a prankster. We call ourselves the world's funniest people. I shall call you Squishy and you shall be my Squishy.

supergrover 4,517 9
07/07/2005 06:30 AM

Just keep swimming, just keep swimming.

Ditdah, sick of counting 123,110 14
07/07/2005 09:32 AM

Son of a bitch - I read that 10 minutes ago, and now I'm singing it in my head.



AAARRRGGGGHHHH!

Whistler P. McManus 186,041 44
07/07/2005 09:54 AM

I'm generally a generous person, but if I'm drinking coffee and you're drinking single malt scotch, don't expect we're splitting the bar bill 50/50.

Walk the Freedom Trae - fi dolla 156,790 17
07/07/2005 12:34 PM

Some people don't have the luxury of being generous with money.



I'll be drinking water... with lemon.

Mr. Sir 66,722 9
07/07/2005 12:38 PM

Lucky.

Walk the Freedom Trae - fi dolla 156,790 17
07/07/2005 12:55 PM

.....just don't leave your drink unattended.





I'm just sayin....

Roofie Raccoon 56,688 10
07/07/2005 02:16 PM

Trae, you ignorant slut. That could have been our secret strategy but now everyone will be watching their drinks!

Tabula Rasa 14,056 9
07/07/2005 02:56 PM

I guess it's good that I have no money and I'm too young to drink. Looks like I'll be living off of water, all riiiiight.



Although I am planning to take ramen that I can make in the hotel room.

Stygian Snork 45,655 12
07/07/2005 03:05 PM

One is never too young to drink.

ringworm 68,315 13
07/07/2005 07:49 PM

when you split the check evenly the

steak eater picks the pocket of the salad man.

Stone Cold Bikini 62,262 18
07/07/2005 10:10 PM

This happened to a friend of mine, but I'll pretend it happened to me. . .





I have a richy-bitch sort of friend, one of those girls who's daddy buys them a car when they turn sixteen, and then a new one when they turn eighteen, cause the other one is getting old. The kind of girl who never had to worry about money, until she moved out of her parents house and got her own place. Anyway, she invited a large group of people over to her new apartment for a fancy dinner party. She called me up the night before, told me what she was playing on cooking, and basically begged me to come. Everyone got dressed up and she had this gorgeous meal made. Four courses, fancy chicken, fancy drinks, fancy desserts, expensive wine. She went all out. My boyfriend and I had to leave early because we had another commitment, and when we left, our hostess walked us to the door. We get on our coats and start to go out when she stops us. "Ah, could you give me about twenty dollars each for the food? It was very expensive." She had neverf breathed a word of this when she invited us, or any one else, yet at the end of the night, she expected everyone to chip in for the dinner she had thrown "in honour of her wonderful friends."











No, we didn't pay her.