DemoMonkey, Mr Contributes-nothing-to- the-world. 166,252 10
07/08/2005 06:50 PM

That wasn't a quesadilla. That was a baby.



REEFER MADNESS STRIKES AGAIN!!

Big Irish Guy 203,956 21
07/08/2005 06:51 PM

I was 12, and I went by myself, mom and dad were so proud.

Return of the Son of The Rockin' Donkey 77,546 17
07/08/2005 06:52 PM

I can't answer this question. By the time of my earliest memory, I was already potty-trained.

Fluorescent Sombrero 91,274 10
07/08/2005 06:54 PM

Don't patronize me.



...









......





Obviously, I can't Frost-ing remember the first time!!

erika the killjoy 76,152 9
07/08/2005 06:56 PM

I was 15, and it was in my basement with my friends. I didn't get high, and as far as I know it's practically impossible to get the first time you smoke.



This 4th of July though, I turned my swimming pool into a gravity bong, and that was pretty insane.

Senior Destructor: Exploded in pretty colors 60,724 12
07/08/2005 06:58 PM

My first stoning was in 9th grade.

Me and another weed virgin managed to get a dub, and we smoked it out of a Coke can.



We'd set up a tent in his parents backyard to sleep in, and walked about half a mile away because we were scared his parents would smell it.



We had also failed to prepare, and thus there was a immense lack of munchies. All we had was half a box of Teddy Grahams. I instanty hoarded it, and spent the rest of the night defending my stash.



We woke up the next morning, covered in crumbs, and my friend had a black eye.





Those Teddy Grahams were mine bitch.

BlaiseMilla 67,037 13
07/08/2005 07:00 PM

My first wasn't much of anything. But we used to go into the bad section of Rochester and buy nickel bags. One time we were leaving and some little black kid smashed my friend's Dad's car windshield with a bat.

Good times.

Oliverius Chesticus XIV 203,475 12
07/08/2005 07:00 PM

Mom was out of town. I had people over, and we smoked in my garage. The rule was "Jon takes a hit, someone else takes a hit, Jon takes a hit, next person takes a hit...etc."



That went on for a couple hours. My kind and caring friends wanted to make sure I got stoned my first time. I did. Got real stoned, got the spins and started feeling like Shakespeare.



Since I was feeling a little nauseas, I thought that if I went to take a crap, I would feel better. I go to the bathroom, and decide to leave the lights off. The light was hurting my eyes.



It was very nice, and cool, and comfy in there. Just one problem, I had no crap to crap. But it seemed so nice in there. I decided to lay down on the bath mat and take a nap. With my pants down around my ankles.



I've been a fairly regular pot smoker ever since.

BigFatty 81 7
07/08/2005 07:00 PM

I smoked some pot with my cousin out of a soda can boule. I didn't get stoned and I don't know why.



The second time I smoked, was once again with my cousin. We were smoking in my parents living room and decided to sit outside and gaze at the stars. Sounds kind of gayish, I know, but we were 11 and 12 and stoned off our gourds. To the southwest we saw some lights in the sky, not stars, and were kind of scared (that's the paranoia kicking in). I remember asking if my cousin that it was a UFO.



My oldest brother then wakes up, having been asleep on the couch (yes we smoked in the living room while he was sleeping). He takes a whiff of sweet pungeant pot smoke and laughs. We see him awake and show him the lights, which by now were dancing in the sky. He didn't know what it was either.



So he woke up Dad. We were still stoned, and the living room still stunk something fierce. My dad then explains to us that it was probably Ball Lightning. He then told us to stop smoking pot and go to bed.



The next morning I woke up and he made me smoke my entire dime bag (such a small amount I know - but huge for a beginner). Then i became rather ill. I still smoked for another five years, so I guess I didn't learn my lesson.

The Mailman: ringing twice, as always 176,450 56
07/08/2005 07:01 PM

My first pot experience was the day I took my first breath of air in Montreal. I've been inhaling second-hand pot smoke at every breath I take outside, ever since I moved here.

Oliverius Chesticus XIV 203,475 12
07/08/2005 07:04 PM

I think smoking pot was a lot more fun when I was in highschool. You had to go through a lot more lengths to get it, and smoke it without being caught. You always end up with cooler stories too.



Now all my pot stories are something like "Yeah, so I came home and smoked a bowl. Man, that Drew Carrey show is funny!"

Declan ('Aaron Altman') McManus. 131,877 36
07/08/2005 07:06 PM

it's not from lack of opportunity...good grief, i grew up in a university town.



it's hard not to find a stoner, or a connection here, even now.



it's from a lack of interest.



i always preferred to drink.



anyway....munchies. very simple explaination. delta-9 tetrahydracannabinol lowers the blood sugar. dramatically.



other signs of low blood sugar-



mood swings



nausea



sweating



giggling like a moron.







the more ye know.

Roofie Raccoon 56,688 10
07/08/2005 07:11 PM

I was 28 or so and a bunch of us were at a pool hall. My friend had a corn-cob pipe (and no this wasn't in Missouri, it was in California). Got only slightly high but the next week got really high and decided that sex while high is exponentially better than sex while sober.

Senior Destructor: Exploded in pretty colors 60,724 12
07/08/2005 07:12 PM

See, that's what's fun about moving home for the summer.



Example (not with reefer, but an example nonetheless):



A few weeks ago, I was in one of those moods where I just didn't really want to have to deal with reality. A friend of mine had a couple pills of E on him, and he tossed me one, and I took it without even caring what it was. Now, normally, my take on drugs is unless its natural, I won't do it, but like I said, I was in one of those moods.



All in all it was a fun night. We wandered around, went down to the beach, I started randomly screaming and a cop came and talked to me, you know, the usual drug nights.



The problem with this is that this was how I'd live at my own place. I had to go back to my parent's house.

Now, it's 4:30 in the morning, I'm still rolling crazy-like, but I figure my Dad's asleep, so I can just go inside and straight to my room.



Nope. My dad's awake.

He asks me where I've been, but (luckily) before I can answer, a moth flies into the wall in front of me, and falls to the ground.



My dad asks me to get it outside.





So I'm bent over in my entryway, trying to catch a crippled moth that's making tracers, and giggling while my Dad watches. It took me about five minutes.



Good times, I tell you, good times.

Senior Destructor: Exploded in pretty colors 60,724 12
07/08/2005 07:13 PM

That was in response to Ollie, by the way.

Fluorescent Sombrero 91,274 10
07/08/2005 07:15 PM

Alright.. Fine. I'll tell a story of my friends first time with Pot.



It was grade 11, and our afternoon classes were interrupted by an assembly in the main gym to honor one of our teachers that passed away.

We decided to skip that and the afternoon and go get sloshed at my buddy Ian's house.

There was 3 of us losers, Myself, Sean and of course Ian.

Ian had never smoked before.



So we get to Ians place, Pour some crazy-strong Vodka and OJs and hit the garage to make a bong.

Sink drain mesh, 2L pepsi bottle and a jacknife later, we were smoking.

Sean and I we're ripped, Ian was quiet.



We smoked all our weed and retire inside to the basement for loud music and rough anal sex bullShakespeare chit-chat.



Ian had just recently aquired a girlfriend and finally got laid (I say finally for all of our sake, He was the wise one in this case)

"You know guys," The vodka-soaked cheeba was speaking, "Sex is good on the penis, but this.. Oh boy This is good on eeeeeverything!"



Drunken and stoned stupidity followed, And finally ended with Ian, passed out in his bed, Projectile vomiting allover his floor. Then again allover the newspaper we'd put down over the first barrage of stomach contents.



Sean and I left Ians house with him laying in bed, wasted, with a glass of water next to him and a note on his chest. His mom found the note before he did when she got home from work.



"Hey Ian, If your folks ask, We weren't here and we didn't do this to you!



Sean & Matt"

Fluorescent Sombrero 91,274 10
07/08/2005 07:18 PM

Mad props, Decs, for someone who knows their Chemical names.



However, There's also Delta 1 through 8 involved, 9 is just the strongest strain.

Oliverius Chesticus XIV 203,475 12
07/08/2005 07:19 PM

I'm 24. Moving home is no longer an option. Even if it was, if my mom ever caught me smoking pot, the worst that would happen would be for her to tell me to smoke it on the back porch and not in the house.

Senior Destructor: Exploded in pretty colors 60,724 12
07/08/2005 07:20 PM

Mad props, Hat, for being okay enough with your retardation to use the phrase "mad props."

lupience- Bedwench 26,981 11
07/08/2005 07:21 PM

I was 8. My brother, who was 17 at the time was too high to roll a joint. So he taught me how....using sugar.

His philosophy was: 'If you can roll a doobie with sugar, you can roll one out of weed- any time, any place.'

So I rolled said sugar doob, and then rolled my first real joint.

Then Brother-dear taught me how to smoke it. I learned quickly.





Then he told me that if I didn't wash the dishes, take out the trash, and clean up the dog Shakespeare in the yard he was going to tell Mom and Dad that I was smoking pot.



Being high, I did as he asked.

Then I made butterscotch pudding.

















Man. My memory is crap.

Senior Destructor: Exploded in pretty colors 60,724 12
07/08/2005 07:21 PM

Yeah...I just really wanted to tell that story, actually.

erika the killjoy 76,152 9
07/08/2005 07:23 PM

I'm 19 and have my own apartment, but it's also okay for me to go home to my parents sometimes.



The worst thing that would happen to me if my parents caught me smoking there, is that they would call me a Bogart for not sharing it with them.

Fluorescent Sombrero 91,274 10
07/08/2005 07:25 PM

SD, I'll say whatever the hell I want.

Since you're a BobJohnson wannabe and a Keebler Elf reject, I'll continue knowing you're nothing.



Have a good weekend.

Big Irish Guy 203,956 21
07/08/2005 07:27 PM

I never really smoked in high school, was drug tested in college and the first two years out of college, and never really tried to get into after that. But I love beer.

Duuuuh - Dyslexia Is Fnu 24,152 8
07/08/2005 07:32 PM

I'll post to this thread tomorrow because I'm heading home to some G-13 (Medicinal Marijuana) and King Arthur (2ft acrylic bong), who shall knight me by blowing his smokey and most excellent load into my lungs so I can convince myself that I'm actually liked here on GAB...









































Hmmn, there might not be enough drugs in the world for that.

Walk the Freedom Trae - fi dolla 156,790 17
07/08/2005 07:32 PM

I honestly don't remember the first time I smoked pot.



Really. But I know I did.



I just know it.

Senior Destructor: Exploded in pretty colors 60,724 12
07/08/2005 07:34 PM

<action>grabs a big magnet, poijts it at Hat.

Senior Destructor: Exploded in pretty colors 60,724 12
07/08/2005 07:35 PM

Yeah, ok...I'm dumb.

Fluorescent Sombrero 91,274 10
07/08/2005 07:46 PM

Stainless steel isn't magnetic.

Coco 1,756 8
07/08/2005 07:47 PM

I've never, ever smoked pot. Never smoked either, nor been drunk.



I have my explanations: my parents both smoke, and when I was 4 I found their cigarette stash. Being naive, I thought that they ate the cigarettes, so I ate one too. The aftermath was enough to put me off ever trying to smoke.

This aversion to smoking anything was exaggerated by many of my friends getting high quite often and their grades subsequently dropping (yes, I'm a geek).



However, I have a huge sensitivity to caffeine, so that's my pot. Once I had half a caffeine pill (pro-plus) and was bouncing off the walls for 48 hours. I was at a UK Youth Parliament National Sitting, and remember waking up from a caffeinated stupor, sitting on a swing at 4am with two guys standing there, and I couldn't remember their names.



A similar caffeinated episode also involved youth politics, and meant that I woke up with some guy's feet next to my head - he felt like sharing my bed, and the others sharing the hotel room gave him permission, as long as he didn't share my duvet or anything (I think I was 15, it would've been sordid otherwise).

Senior Destructor: Exploded in pretty colors 60,724 12
07/08/2005 07:48 PM

Yeah, ok...I'm dumb.

Fluorescent Sombrero 91,274 10
07/08/2005 07:56 PM

Actually, Me too.



I mean't Surgical steel, Stainless might just be...

Senior Destructor: Exploded in pretty colors 60,724 12
07/08/2005 07:59 PM

We're both Frost ups.



Let's go smoke a joint.

Big Irish Guy 203,956 21
07/08/2005 08:06 PM

<action>makes note to buy stock in cheetos</action>

lupience- Bedwench 26,981 11
07/08/2005 08:06 PM

Hey, Big Irish Guy! Beer loves you too.





Sincerely,

Lupience

Big Irish Guy 203,956 21
07/08/2005 08:08 PM

Yes. Yes, I know.

Prof. Fantabulous 19,711 13
07/08/2005 08:15 PM

I don't know if it was the first (there is not that many to begin with) i did a kick ass Jack Nicholson impression. I also have a piece of paper with peoples names and connecting lines on it. My friend and i were making bets on how peoples lives would turn out. We still don't know how to read it.





I remember my mom's first time smoking. That was a wierd phone call.

lupience- Worm Farmer 26,981 11
07/08/2005 08:15 PM

I'm Finnish- beer and I have become the best of friends.





Potatoes, on the other hand.....

BELONG TO THE FINNS NOT THE IRISH YOU Frost.







*back to your regularly scheduled programming.*

Big Irish Guy 203,956 21
07/08/2005 08:24 PM

BELONG TO THE FINNS NOT THE IRISH YOU Frost.





Hmmmm, so you're saying that they're Finnish property and not THE IRISH YOU Frost. Since you didn't put a comma <,> in between IRISH and YOU. I know you didn't say the IRISH, YOU Frost. So you didn't call me a Frost. That means they belong to the Finns that Frost Irish people. You said that you are a Finn, so I am guessing your husband is Irish. Which shines some light on your marriage, because I am sure only a drunk could deal with your ramblings.





See, punctuation can be fun.

Chit Eating Grin 178,776 15
07/08/2005 09:07 PM

I think smoking pot was a lot more fun when I was in high school. You had to go through a lot more lengths to get it, and smoke it without being caught. You always end up with cooler stories too.





I agree with all that Oliver but would add that when you are in High School, it may not seem like it, but your world is still fairly stress free in comparison.



I must have smoked a forest when younger, but then slowed down to not at all eventually, (didn't like the way it mixed with the blow)



After stopping though, if I tried it again on a rare occasion or accidentally hit it when someone put it my face, (out of habit usually) I would go into instant paranoia mode. If I had a list of ten things to do, and had a hit, Frostit....lock the door, not taking phone calls, I'm going nowhere. Once I realized I had nothing I had to do that I could trip on, I could have fun watching TV or whatever, but if the phone rings, or the Jehovah's knock on the door, and I'm right back in paranoid mode.



*I find myself now wondering if I want to get high again now.

DemoMonkey, Mr Contributes-nothing-to- the-world. 166,252 10
07/08/2005 09:27 PM

So I'm the only male Gabber who doesn't smoke marijuana and has a functioning liver?



I'm going to have to start putting my pee in vials and selling it.









...

Professionally, I mean.

The Brown Paper Bag (Recyclable) 20 7
07/08/2005 09:32 PM

Hahaha, demo, you aren't the only clean guy on GAB. Hmm... maybe we could put together a group of clean Gabbers. That way we'd make a killing using your business venture.

Fratberry 282,940 53
07/08/2005 09:34 PM

1974, Louisville, Kentucky, Derby Eve Jam. Two months short of my 8th birthday. Charlie Daniels Band, Marshall Tucker Band and Wet Willie. With my parents and my brother, who's seven years older than me and, unfortunately unknown to me at the time, an enormous pothead.



I smell this aroma wafting through Freedom Hall and its amazing. I ask my father what it was, who turned to my mother who said something about how I didn't need to know and it was just smoke. I DO KNOW that my brother looked at me, grinned, and said "breathe deep, little brother. Breathe deep."



I don't remember the concert much and I wouldn't have remembered who played that night if it weren't for the ticket stub that I have to this very day. I DO remember being so very, very happy.

Fluorescent Sombrero 91,274 10
07/08/2005 09:37 PM

Not to be a Emerson, Demo, But I'm good at it.



You're also one of the few guys here who met his.. well.. probably only girlfriend on a comedy message board full of drunken, stoned nerds. And one Emerson.

Underwhere? 101,398 77
07/08/2005 09:48 PM

I've never smoked pot or tried any other drugs. I don't have a good excuse as to why either. I grew up in a trailer park where half the neighbors were living off of welfare and spending all their time high. The other half were the ones dealing the drugs. I'm surprised I never gave in to peer pressure!



I had 6 close friends from that trailer park, and all of them started on pot. I was the only one to actually graduate from high school. 2 of my friends ODed on heroin, and another is in prison because of it. One actually went through drug court, got clean and is now working at a Waffle Hut. The 4th has 5 kids under the age of 8, all with different daddies. She is unmarried and chronically unemployed. The 5th I last saw about 10 years ago, at my wedding. He was high then, and rumor has it, he's high now, living under a bridge a couple towns over.



Shakespeare, did I just describe half the people here on GAB?

Senior Destructor: Exploded in pretty colors 60,724 12
07/08/2005 09:50 PM

Nope.



I wasn't at your wedding.

Trixxiewan Kenobie 65,026 15
07/08/2005 09:53 PM

d fe I got bannned form GAB

Senior Destructor: Exploded in pretty colors 60,724 12
07/08/2005 09:53 PM

Why is it that whenever we get a thread about pot, a bunch of dumbasses come around?



It's like a weird cyber-aroma or something.

Roofie Raccoon 56,688 10
07/08/2005 09:56 PM

Hat, don't be an Emerson. Not only is your statement to Demo retarded, it's wrong, so just chill.

Filly 39,193 20
07/08/2005 09:57 PM

I don't smoke, drink, or do drugs. I'm boring. On the other hand, I just had sex in the woods. Fun times.

DemoMonkey, Mr Contributes-nothing-to- the-world. 166,252 10
07/08/2005 09:59 PM

Sombrero



So I can mark you down for two vials then?



I'm going to need more juice...

Fluorescent Sombrero 91,274 10
07/08/2005 09:59 PM

Kinda too late, Hmm?



My first thought reading that was that he was being sort of pretentious, Which I know isn't really characteristicly Demo, but it gave me enough of a "hmph" attitude about it, I wanted to poke him in a soft spot. To me, Demo is sorta the last one picked for the team. Ask him how to program softwear, Not how to unclasp a bra, Y'know? It might not be true, But it makes me chuckle.



I'm a bully.

Fluorescent Sombrero 91,274 10
07/08/2005 10:00 PM

Plus, He's gonna come back at me with something good and get a full tube.

It's win win.

Senior Destructor: Exploded in pretty colors 60,724 12
07/08/2005 10:03 PM

Hat's an angry stoner.

DemoMonkey, Mr Contributes-nothing-to- the-world. 166,252 10
07/08/2005 10:05 PM

Nah, he's just peeved because he thinks I'm arrogant and pretentious. I'm used to it.



That conclusion is not uncommon in inferior people.

Senior Destructor: Exploded in pretty colors 60,724 12
07/08/2005 10:07 PM

Not just you, you arrogant prick.*





He's been angry all thread.





I don't actually think this

Fluorescent Sombrero 91,274 10
07/08/2005 10:07 PM

Au contrair, I'm out. Can you believe it?



Contributing factor..?

Filly 39,193 20
07/08/2005 10:08 PM

I have bad timing.

Fluorescent Sombrero 91,274 10
07/08/2005 10:12 PM

No, I just got a pretentious tone from the first read I made over it, I clicked it, I posted with a stupid grin on my face. Simple as that. Obviously now I've reread it enough that I realize I was a little off, Can't go back now can I? I've never been one of those people, And I'm not gonna start because I have no weed!



But thats okay, I'm used to it by now, I'm sure he is too. It's fun to make little cracks on your peers' weak spots. And as we can see, It leads to more subtle comedy.

Rodney King 282,940 53
07/08/2005 10:19 PM

CANT WE ALL JUST GET ALONG???

Fluro, President of Takapuna 14,139 11
07/08/2005 10:21 PM

I Drink, but don't smoke. I know too many potheads to want to join them.

Walk the Freedom Trae - fi dolla 156,790 17
07/08/2005 10:21 PM

I have bad timing.



Lets hope Robin Hood and his Merry Men didn't have bad timing in the woods.....

TTJane-pour me a cab, I can't drink any more 173,958 15
07/08/2005 10:24 PM

I don't remember the first tim I got high, but when I was in 8th grade, I knew an adult that smoked pot. I thought I would be ultra-cool and take some pot to school the next day.

I snuck into this person's closet, and dug around. There were a couple baggies in there, and I just grabbed the one on top.



It turns out that this person would seperate out all their pot when they got a bag. They would put the stems and seeds in one bag, and the smokable Shakespeare in the other.

Needless to say, I grabbed the bag with the stems and seeds. How was I supposed to know? I had never seen it before. So I went to school the next day, acting all cool and ended up being laughed at.



There was a girl named Dusty, and of all the people there that morning, she was the only one who was a bitch about it. Everyone else understood that it was an honest mistake.

A week later, they carried her out of the school to an ambulance. She had been huffing anti-freeze behind the school. She ended up with a hole in her lung.

The moral of this story? Don't try to steal drugs from others, and don't make fun of Jane.

Fluro, President of Takapuna 14,139 11
07/08/2005 10:24 PM

A heterosexual coupple in the act finding men in the woods in funny costumes having a giant orgy? Just who are the ones with bad timing?

Filly 39,193 20
07/08/2005 10:28 PM

Lets hope Robin Hood and his Merry Men didn't have bad timing in the woods.....



Not at all.

lupience- Worm Farmer 26,981 11
07/08/2005 10:32 PM

Dear Big Irish Guy,

I've had my share of fun with punctuation.

Periods suck.

I HATE apostrophies.





My husband is swedish, not irish, he's the perv in my pervertson.





Leave my potatoes alone!



P.S. Finland was the ONLY country to pay the United States back their WWII debt.





Then they all got naked, went into the sauna, and beat themselves with birch and cedar switches.



Much like I'm doing now.



Love ya BIG guy,

Lupience.





*swat*

The Right Reverend Phuc 237,919 21
07/08/2005 10:37 PM

Seventh grade. I'd had a crush since the fourth grade on Tracy Pelusio. One day, at the bus stop, she offers to sell me a few joints, which of course I buy.



I bring them to band practice so the bass player can teach me how to smoke it.



Like most people's first time, nothing happened.



Then we played "Freebird."



I'm not kidding.

Filly 39,193 20
07/08/2005 10:45 PM

I don't know what "Freebird" is.

MiLLie 116,988 28
07/08/2005 10:47 PM

I was probably in 7th or 8th grade. I smoked with my brothers. I don't remember if I got stoned or not.



I used to smoke every day in high school. My brother still smokes daily and is much more successful than I am.



I haven't smoked in years. My brother always offers it to me, but I never feel like smoking it these days.

MiLLie 116,988 28
07/08/2005 10:48 PM

<action>sings</action>

If I leave here tomorroooow...

Will you still remember me?

'cause I must be traveling on nooow..

There's too many places I've got to see...

Fratberry 282,940 53
07/08/2005 10:52 PM

I don't know what "Freebird" is.



Leave the south. Now, please.

Fratberry 282,940 53
07/08/2005 10:54 PM

Ok, ok. Actually, it was an original song by Al and his P.E. teacher Leonard.

Fratberry 282,940 53
07/08/2005 10:55 PM

Wait, lemme guess. You don't know what "P.E." is either.

MiLLie 116,988 28
07/08/2005 11:00 PM

<action>still singing (it's a long song)</action>

...and the bird you cannot cha-ah-a-ah-a-ah-a-ayayage...

supergrover 4,517 9
07/08/2005 11:18 PM

The day before my first time, I turned down the joint that my friends were offering me and when I went to school the next day I was all proud and told my vice principal that I had said no to drugs. He was very proud.



That night I got high and drunk for the first time, and had my first dry hump session. The next day the vice principal sees me in the halls and says, "Did your friends offer you pot again? Did you stay strong baby girl?"



Nope.

Filly 39,193 20
07/08/2005 11:19 PM

I do know what P.E. is. And you need to know what STFU is.













Just kidding. Love ya, Frat!

MiLLie 116,988 28
07/08/2005 11:26 PM

What the hell is a vice-principal doing calling a student "Baby Girl"? Yuck.



It sounds...harass-y.

Errol 10,584 9
07/08/2005 11:36 PM

MEN OF GAB, YOU DISAPPOINT AND DISGUST ME. THE PRETTY LADY JUST FrostED IN THE FOREST. IT DOESN'T GET HOTTER THAN THAT.





Thank you.

supergrover 4,517 9
07/08/2005 11:49 PM

No, he was black.

Sylvester 4,465 9
07/09/2005 12:06 AM

<action>noticing title of thread</action>



Chili ate right through it.

OneEyedTrouserTrout 6,046 8
07/09/2005 12:10 AM

My first pot experience was 20 years ago. But I never exhaled.

REAPERR-FU 12,363 11
07/09/2005 12:11 AM

Sisters took me to a party at their boyfriends house. Boones Farm Strawberry something and MD20/20. Small brown envolpes. Yellow wheat papers.

I was 8yr old. Sisters thought by taking me on a walk mom and dad would think all was on the up and up. Though they had never taken me for a walk before. I am sure it was the cheap booze that got me Frosted up but I was. Spinning and barely able to walk.

When we got home my mother had asked why I looked so strange and was walking funny. I mumbled something back and got backhanded by the old man. It was war from that point on.

PuggyD 48,304 12
07/09/2005 01:24 AM

Smokers are jokers.

QksilverGirl 110 9
07/09/2005 01:44 AM

Fall, 1974 and i was almost 11. I got high completely by accident.

Honest.

My brothers, at the age of 15 and 16, were entrusted with my care for the first time when my (widowed) dad went on his annual pheasant hunting trip to South Dakota. I woke up Saturday morning and lo and behold! A pan of warm gooey brownies cooling on the counter. What a fantastic breakfast, i thought, and proceeded to cut two huge chunks out and scarf them down. (It should be noted that they were later served in two inch squares.) I remember wondering why i felt so tired and laid down on the couch. A year or fifteen minutes later, i opened my eyes to find three of my brothers' friends hovering over me. My older brother, known as Dooders then (real name Steve...signed a girl's yearbook as "Stevie Wonder" and she said.."Stevie Dooders?") was behind them with a couple of cases of beer. Just as one said, "Dooders, i think your little sister is stoned!" i hear my other brother, Chris, shout "Frost!!!" from the kitchen, discovering the huge hole i'd made in the brownies. Their friend, Huff, who to this day i still have a crush on, was elected to keep an eye on me. He decided to make my first high a great experience and took me to all the cool places in Duluth, MN like Skyline Drive, overlooking the city and Lake Superior and Park Point, a beach on the lake. When i came down enough, he brought me home, gave me a kiss on the cheek and ruffled my hair before we got out of the car. I nearly swooned...then spent the rest of the afternoon sleeping while my brothers and their friends partied on in my dad's absence.

My brothers, it turned out, were two of the biggest dealers in Duluth. Chris used to give me it for free. Steve offered to sell it to me, but why did i need to pay with Chris around, right?

Errol 10,584 9
07/09/2005 01:46 AM

He decided to make my first high a great experience and took me to all the cool places in Duluth, MN







I'd be willing to be that there's no such thing as a "cool" place in Duluth, MN.

Chit Eating Grin 178,776 15
07/09/2005 02:33 AM

What song is it you want to hear ?







I heard it then....





I have a buddy that is constantly watching and waiting for the opportunity to shout out "Freebird"



Wedding toasts, sporting events before the anthem, piano recitals, anywhere where people gather, and it gets silent for a moment.





It's actually funny as hell the first thirty times or so.

Dr. Napkin Descartes 30,762 12
07/09/2005 02:37 AM

I've honestly never done drugs.



I don't know why.



But I make up for it, and then some with my drinkin.

lupience- Worm Farmer 26,981 11
07/09/2005 02:59 AM

Dear All Those Who Never Got High,



Pin Roses on your asses, and listen to Dynamo Hum, Frank Zappa.



Then pin another rose on your ass.



Love always,

Lupience





P.S. Pin a rose on your ass.

Leg of Fish 1,612 9
07/09/2005 03:09 AM

My first time with pot, I was 15, and going through a big Lord Of The Rings thing. I mean, REALLY BIG. My friends and I used to write in runes and everything. And we decided it was time to make some staffs.



One of my friends lived out on a farm (small town livin') near a pine plantation, so we planned a midnight outbreak to go and steal some suitable young trees. We also decided that this would be an ideal time to break in a couple of reefers which my sister had decided to share with me (she's now an alcoholic teacher, my family has class).



Everything went quite well, if you count cutting downs trees with a penknife in the middle of the night successful, and not really getting stoned. Though we all did our best to pretend.

Leg of Fish 1,612 9
07/09/2005 03:14 AM

I've now returned to my little green friends after a hiatus of some years (due to regular drug testing policies). A few weeks ago, a friend came round, we went through a coupe of spliffs, and we retired to the living room to eat potato chips and play guitar. Our work done there, we returned to the kitchen to roll another, and found that one of the cats had cleaned the plate...

Dr. Napkin Descartes 30,762 12
07/09/2005 03:18 AM

HAPPY FACE CAN INTERMISSION!

lupience- Worm Farmer 26,981 11
07/09/2005 03:22 AM

leg of fish-

Go put pennies on the nearest train track. Let us know what happened.

Then make a cocktail using everything under your kitchen sink. Drink it. Let us know what happened.

I love you,

Lupience

lupience- Worm Farmer 26,981 11
07/09/2005 03:23 AM

Napkin, you rock. AND roll.

Bold type indeed.

Leg of Fish 1,612 9
07/09/2005 03:29 AM

All I have under the kitchen sink is the torso of my landlord.

lupience- Worm Farmer 26,981 11
07/09/2005 03:32 AM

Dear Fishleg,

1:puree

2:add hemlock

3:drink

4:go find another forum



Sincerely,

Lupience

Fishcrates 1,612 9
07/09/2005 03:41 AM

Dear Lupience:

1. Suck

2. My

3. Coleridge



love,

Fishegs

Leg of Fish 1,612 9
07/09/2005 03:48 AM

Oh, dear...

S. Kake 55,555 14
07/09/2005 05:04 AM

Wow, I'm late for this thread, huh?



I don't remember my exact first time, but here's a couple of experiences from my early days as a pothead:



CCD is a religious class Catholics have to go through when they're kids. So I was on my way to CCD one day at some lady's house, and I run into this kid Adam I know. He smokes me up in the woods with a one hitter, and I'm high as hell. I finally make my way to CCD, I'm 15 minutes late, and everyone's sitting around in a circle, and there's an old guy I don't know sitting with everyone else. My CCD teacher explains the Frost-ing BISHOP is visiting with all the CCD classes in town this week. The Frost-ing BISHOP. I don't really remember much of anything else from that day, but I'll bet I'm the only person I'll ever meet who's been high with a bishop.

S. Kake 55,555 14
07/09/2005 05:04 AM

One time I had some hash, and I was grounded, and wasn't allowed to leave my room. I had nothing to smoke out of. I look around my room, and I have two of the three necessary components to rig a ghetto bowl, tin foil and apin. I need some sort of plastic bottle. The only thing I can find is a plastic bottle of Brut cologne I had gotten from my grandmother a couple of years before for xmas. So I go into the bathroom, dump it out, rinse the hell out of it, and make the bowl. I'm hanging out of my bedroom window in the middle of January, and of course, it's harsh as Frost because I'm breathing nast Brut fumes. Brut's a pretty nasty cologne on it's own, but directly inhaling it with hash smoke is even worse. So I'm coughing like a mother-Froster, and I don't hear my dad open the sliding door below me, he's watching me smoke it, and looking up at me. He yells, and I pull myself back in, throw the lit bowl under my bed, and get back in my bed like nothing happened, reading a magazine, with the window blowing in freezing January air. He's barrelling up the steps, and I realize that I've still got a lungful of hash and brut. He comes in and starts asking where it is, and I can't hold it in any longer, and exhale a huge cloud of smoke. Needless to say, I was grounded for a hell of a lot longer.

S. Kake 55,555 14
07/09/2005 05:17 AM

The time I came closest to going to jail, I was with 3 other guys in my friend's yellow jeep. I had an ounce on me I had just bought, and we were doing Bong hits while we drove around. So the driver, John, who's a complete idiot, decided to gas and pass at the local Gasstation downtown. He pumps his gas, and takes off, and I'm pretty pissed because the way I figure it, if we had money for an ounce, we had money for gas. IT's not worth getting arrested for. So of course, we're driving along in this extremely conspicuous yellow jeep with pot smoke blowing out of the windows, and we come to an intersection. A cop pulls up to the same intersection, and his lights go on. Frost. So he directs us into this strip mall parking lot (I still shudder every time I go by there). I shove my ounce under a T-hirt in the way back of the Jeep. It's by far not the cleanest car I've ever been in. So he makes us get out, and in 5 minutes, there's 5 more cop cars, and a couple of unmarkeds, and we're up on the hood of the cop car. It's dusk, and I can see them rifiling through the Jeep, looking for the ounce. The cop comes waddling over, and demands to know where it is. "Where what is?" "The marijuana you guys have been smoking." "I don't smoke marijuana, sir." He snorts and goes back to talk to his cop biddies. "Just Frost-ing tell him now, dude, and it'll go easier." John tells me. "You say a Frost-ing word and I'll Frost-ing kill you."

S. Kake 55,555 14
07/09/2005 05:18 AM

The never found the bag, they had been throwing all the trash and dirty clothes into the way back, on top of it. they also somehow missed a 2 foot bong under the passenger seat. they did find a mirror with coke residue and a bowl in the dashboard. "Is this your pipe?" the cop asks John. "No, it's my dad's." He lies. Frost-ing idiot. "Well if your DAD wants his pipe back, he can come down to the station and get it."



I'll be damned if two hours later, after that narrow escape, John doesn't call the police station as his dad, and march in there with his brass balls, and demand his pipe back. They gave it to him.



John looks like Shakespeare now, he got into heroin really bad. Guess he wasn't as smart as he thought.

Chit Eating Grin 178,776 15
07/09/2005 08:45 AM

Here is one of the coolest first experiences to ever have taken place.

Chit Eating Grin 178,776 15
07/09/2005 09:44 AM

Kake you reminded me of a time way back when I was about 20 I guess. We were having a small gathering at someone's house, as there weren't that many friends that moved out yet, so those that did, tended to be having a small gathering every night for those who hadn't yet.



So I had a date that was a pretty good friend as well, and everyone knew her and her family. Someone broke out the bong and put a big party bowl on it and packed it full and sent it around. I hit it, gagged, coughed more and passed t my date Cindy. She waited a bit than when my face went back to it's normal color she tapped me and said she had never smoked from a bong before. I assured her it was no big deal, but by then the restless folks on deck, had already started asking what was up, where is the bong......The guy that packed it said, here I'll get it going for you and torched it again as he squeezed in an extra hit for himself, then passed it to her.



I guess I hadn't realized that she was pretty nervous about smoking from this new hellish contraption, (which shocked me because she was no stranger to joints and pipes.) She got so worked up that she grabbed it and tried her best to look like she was an old pro, but instead of placing her mouth on the opening at the top, she fastened her lips snugly, right around the glowing red hot, half dollar sized bowl that was obviously on fire.

(I'm giggling like Frost while trying to type this)



She immediately knew she had committed a foul, and picked her head up and spit sparks all over the place followed by a "WOOOOHHHH*COUGH*OHH*Shakespeare*COUGH"



It's been 15 years, and even today if I see Cindy and say, "Hey do you remember" ....she will cut me off with, "Yea yea the time I hit the bong and burned my mouth" Ha Ha !

JepRep - Limericking Lunatic till March 17th 58,758 13
07/09/2005 09:46 AM

For some reason, when I first tried pot, I kept getting this sensation that I had accidentally wet myself and spent most of the night glancing at my own crotch to make sure I hadn't. My friends must have asumed I had a real severe case of self-directed penis envy.

S. Kake 55,555 14
07/09/2005 01:59 PM

haha, chit, I knew a kid who did that. We were tryng to be all stealthy in his parents garage, he got a mouthful of hot coals, and jumped backwards-into a shelving unit filled with his mother's pottery. It was about 2am, and weren't even supposed to be there. It was the loudest crash ever, and I'm pretty sure after the rest of us bolted, his father beat the living Shakespeare out of him.

Hammerhead 59,399 14
07/09/2005 03:45 PM

Never touched pot. Or any drugs for that matter. Not for lack of availability. First real party where it was available in college, I passed. It wasn't much bigger than a roach, and I didn't want my first experience to be with such a small piece, especially since there were about seven others all trying to puff on it.



I've never really felt a need to smoke pot, although I would consider trying it just to say I have. I smoked cigarettes for several years but have since quit, so that wasn't a problem. I drink, but rarely.



So I guess I'll join Demo selling my pee.

Balfazz 518 9
07/09/2005 03:59 PM

Well, I'm pretty sure it was when the Jefferson Starship came to a frat house room where we were after the concert. After that, it gets kinda blurry.

MiLLie 116,988 28
07/09/2005 10:25 PM

My brother used to play the drums and banjo and he and his friends would practice in the basement.



We had forced-hot air heat--one of those ancient systems with air ducts going to every room in the house.



My brother and his friends were down in the basement, "playing music" (not very well) and smoking pot. My parents and I were up in the living room.



The furnace kicked on and the air started coming through the vent, along with clouds of pot smoke.



My father got all pissed off and went down into the basement. My brother and his friends heard him coming down, so they hid the pot pipes and a couple of them lit cigarettes.



My brother couldn't understand how my dad figured out they were smoking pot. My father didn't tell him how he knew.



I doubt my brother got grounded or anything--he was always getting caught for Shakespeare and not getting in trouble. But he didn't try smoking dope in the house when my parents were home anymore.

Chi Chi Felipe: World Patrol Kid 161,353 14
07/09/2005 10:45 PM

It was 1869. Some friends of mine and myself were trapping pelts along the Mississippi. We were a rag-tag group of hardened war veterans. Johnny Reb had not five years earlier been our sworn enemy, but when the dust settled from that abhorrent conflict, we found ourselves to be the best of chums. He had purchased a satchel of marijuana from an old Indian named Toad Who Jumps. Toad Who Jumps was a shaman, a medicine man, and he had spent the better part of his boyhood living among the Martians on the space colony Zarkaur 7. He brought that "seeing plant" back with him when the Martians committed mass suicide in the year 2828, packed a time-machine with strains of sativa and indica and a young Cherokee boy they had kidnapped during the Spanish Inquisition. We packed up Johnny's corncob pipe with the sticky green vegetation and lit it with an ember from our fire. It was amazing, and I valmorphized into a coyote, my spirit animal, and roamed among the Tetons with a bear named Sue.

Rep. Jep Rep. 007 58,758 13
07/09/2005 10:51 PM

Millie, somehow I have a hard time picturing a hop-headed banjo player. Then again, I guess it would have taken harder drugs than pot to come up with that abomination of nature featured in the beginning of "Deliverence" wouldn't it?

MiLLie 116,988 28
07/09/2005 11:05 PM

Here he is. Respected business owner, lawyer, and pot-head banjo player. I should ask him to come to the party with me.

MiLLie 116,988 28
07/09/2005 11:09 PM

Plus, he'd probably bring a ton of free beer. His store sells all kinds of microbrews and Shakespeare.

Roofie Raccoon 56,688 10
07/09/2005 11:11 PM

Chi Chi that was beautiful.

MiLLie 116,988 28
07/09/2005 11:11 PM

And pot.













He'd bring pot, he doesn't sell it at his sore.

Rock Lobster 4 7
07/09/2005 11:12 PM

The first time I tried pot was in 10th grade. It was about 5 minutes bofore school started when my friend and I finished smoking the dime bag. Halfway through first period I was upset that it didn't work so I took a handful of random pills. By handful I mean 15 or 20 sleeping pills and dramimine.



When I got to my second period German class I still wasn't high, so I went to the bathroom to smoke some more pot. About ten minutes after I went back into class the fire alarm went off. As soon as I stood up to leave the classroom it hit me. I toppled over and fell on the ground. Thankfully a couple of mein freunden helped me to leave the classroom unnoticed by the teacher. Unfortunately when we came to the two flights of stairs we had to go down to get to the sidewalk they were a little preoccupied looking at the crew of firemen rushing to save the day. I made it safely down one flight but I was not so lucky on the second flight. I rolled down next to the very hot German exchange student and stood up quickly and pretended nothing happened though she saw the whole thing. I then proceeded to hit on her in broken German. She actually seemed pretty into it until I said something about Teil suchen which was when I got slapped in the face.



Oh yeah. The huge fire was really just a bag of burnt popcorn in the teachers lounge microwave. And Teil sucken means penis sucking.

Whistler P. McManus 186,041 44
07/10/2005 12:01 AM

I'm reasonably sure that the first time I smoked pot was during spring break track camp when I was in 8th grade. It was the beginning of my 5 year career of getting high out on the cross country trails around my school.



That career was almost ruined when Steve Romero (who we called Romerojuana, by the way) dropped a joint and started a brush fire.



Several years after that I had a bad acid trip, and after that I couldn't smoke pot anymore without becoming instantly and intensely paranoid. From then on I pretty much stuck to meth and alcohol, with the occasional lude or line of coke.

Whistler P. McManus 186,041 44
07/10/2005 12:03 AM

Oh yes, I went into the detox unit at New York Hospital on September 4, 1990.



Been completely clean ever since.

MiLLie 116,988 28
07/10/2005 12:10 AM

Whistler, that's why I hardly smoke pot anymore, either. Acid ruined getting high for me.



I never went to detox, though.

dropkick brody and her Army of Flaming Leprechauns 43,090 12
10/29/2005 11:07 PM

My first (and only) time was after a very drunk night out. So I don't know what poison to blame for my strangeness on that night.



I remember cooking beans, and then being forcefed them by my friend. 'If you love me, you'll eat the beans' were her exact words.



Then we made pizza which I dropped. And laughed so much about it that I had to lie down. After removing the pizza from the floor and eating it, I had some Pepsi, which tasted weird. I was on my second glass before I realised it was Pepsi and vodka.



Not the best way to sober up, really.

K the Wonderpuppy 1,019 7
10/29/2005 11:43 PM

Hmm...my first experience with pot involved my parents smuggling it into Vermont illegally from Amsterdam. My dad planted the plant out by the barn. The cows ate the plant. The cows had all the fun...

PubahDammitt, Navel Lint Manufacturer 56,805 18
11/01/2005 11:33 AM

Got a 'shotgun' from a really attractive, full liped sistah. I got really light headed and had a sence of euphoria for about an hour.



Don't remember if it was the cannibis or the blood rushing from my brain to my penis.

lupience, bearer of the towel 26,981 11
11/01/2005 11:41 AM

or the blood rushing from my brain to my penis.



...isn't your brain and penis the same thing?

Deep Thought sans GPP 15,703 0
11/01/2005 11:42 AM

There are 42 known varieties of cannibis.

PubahDammitt, Navel Lint Manufacturer 56,805 18
11/01/2005 11:43 AM

Maybe in your anatomy



but not in mine

lupience, bearer of the towel 26,981 11
11/01/2005 11:44 AM

I don't have a penis.



Not a real one anyway.

PubahDammitt, Navel Lint Manufacturer 56,805 18
11/01/2005 11:46 AM

Maybe you can borrow mine sometime



All you need do is whistle. You do know how to whistle don't you? Just put your lips together and BLAM!!

hisboyelroy 10,621 13
11/01/2005 09:32 PM

after busting your ass all day, it's hard to beat rolling a hogleg and throwing some mst3k on.



i've recently quit smoking in order to get a job in january. that sucks. on the bright side, me and old jack daniels have renewed our vows.

Suicide Ranger with Posin Turkey for the Pilgrims 27,937 12
11/01/2005 09:42 PM

Hmm let's see, first time, I vomited, and passed out. Second time, I violently vomited and passed out, third time I violently vomited for about half an hour and passed out. I don't smoke marijuana anymore, and the smell of it makes me want to be sick. I do believe what I have is an allergic reaction to it.

hisboyelroy 10,621 13
11/01/2005 09:44 PM

the same thing happens to me when i eat pinecones.

newwave 45,912 10
11/02/2005 05:32 AM

I guess I can sign up with the people who sell their clean urine on the black market.



Although I did have an experience with weed, it was in the winter of 1995. I was on some school field trip to Breckenridge, Colorado, and we all had to share hotel rooms, four people to the room. The powers that be had set me up in a room with the three biggest dopers, thinking that my straight-edge self would keep them out of trouble. Actually, I fell almost instantly asleep when I got to the room, and woke up to a cloud that would make a London fog pale by comparison. After assuring everyone (which by now actually was everyone in the class) that I wasn't going to snitch, I left the room, and suddenly became very hungry. I managed to steal a few bags of chips from some resort snack bar, and instantly became the hero when I returned to the room.

Magic Thighs of Chickens 286,527 61
11/02/2005 09:52 AM

Boy Scouts



We were discussing ways to shed weight out of our packs for an Appalachain Trail hike (20 miles or so) and we started joking about dehydrated wine. But our patrol leader said,"Why not just carry pot? My brother sells it."



We did and the motto "Be Prepared" took on a whole new meaning for me. Scouts got better too.

Millie Christmas and a Happy New Year 116,988 28
12/19/2005 03:09 AM

We're just used to the young girls talking about the odd places they have sex.



The woods, a hearse...meh. Who cares?

I'll be home for Yorkie 60,724 12
12/19/2005 03:12 AM

Really, is 'disappointed' all that hard to spell?

Supergroverpunk 4,517 9
12/19/2005 03:29 AM

I got high, and it was good. Ahmen.

ringworm 68,315 13
12/19/2005 03:56 AM

aqua teen hunger force is hilarious while sober.



first stoned experience: had split a bottle of boone's farm strawberry hill (and finished the bottle in about 5 minutes or so) w/ this girl i was dating at the time, but then i started puking, so that put the kibosh on that little sexcapade. once i'd regained my composure, she drove me home (almost wrecking the car along the way), and, once home, i almost threw up on my sister, who was innocently getting a drink of water from the kitchen sink.



long story short, marri-joo-anna is for retards. take some real drugs if you've got the balls. if you are ball-less, then don't bother. pot's a joke.

I'll be home for Yorkie 60,724 12
12/19/2005 04:14 AM

You were beaten to that joke by five months and eleven days.