Chris Garrett 86,932 12
07/28/2005 12:08 PM

She then went back inside, went into the studio, and shut the door. Around 15 minutes later, her co-host goes in, and comes back out, white as a ghost. She took a penknife and was cutting herself on her forearms.



(I wish I was making any of this up...but it's all true.)



The station manager was called to the studio, she came in, and found Pauline curled up in a chair, in the fetal position, sounding quote, "Like she was in the exorcist."



We called her husband, who came and got her.......I showed up just as he was leading her by the hand out the door, and she was muttering, and staring wildly all over the place.



Needless to say, she wasn't in today....the company basically said, "Do NOT come back, until you have a doctor's note saying you are being treated."



Anyone here work with the mentally troubled?? I think FDIC does, anyone else?



I wanted to pass this story on for two reasons...one, because it IS kinda funny, in a twisted GAB way, and two, I would be interested to know if anyone knows what her problem is.



*It's her real name.

erika the killjoy 76,152 9
07/28/2005 12:10 PM

That's what extended periods of exposure to country music will do to a person.

Janice 181,790 70
07/28/2005 12:11 PM

I go to work every day. That's pretty troubling for everyone else.

daisypie 49,378 9
07/28/2005 12:11 PM

Can I get her numb- oh, she's married. Nevermind.

gorctemp 41,132 13
07/28/2005 12:11 PM

Could simply be depression. Caused all kinds of dissociative events, hallucinations and the desire to cut myself with BIC razors with me. Of course, I was also diagnosed with Panic Disorder, Anxiety Disorder and OCD.

BlaiseMilla 67,037 13
07/28/2005 12:12 PM

She's got an Achey Breaky Heart.

Niles 3,169 9
07/28/2005 12:12 PM

I have a brother who would be perfect for this situation, as he is not only a psychiatrist, but he also has a radio show. I'll email his number to you.

Deepan the Paranoid Android 2,042 8
07/28/2005 12:12 PM

I worked the night shift at home depot. i think they exclusively hire the mentally unstable to work it. trust me, it's one of the spookiest places in the world at night.

Big Irish Guy 203,956 21
07/28/2005 12:12 PM

My coworkers complain that there is this real Frost-ing weirdo in the office but I have never met hi...SONOFABITCH.

erika the killjoy 76,152 9
07/28/2005 12:13 PM

Blaise, that was awesome. However, if I cannot get that song out of my head within the next fifteen minutes I will have to track you down and hurt you.

OneEyedTrouserTrout 6,046 8
07/28/2005 12:14 PM

"Anyone here work with the mentally troubled??"



Uhhhh, next time give me a hard question

Deepan the Paranoid Android 2,042 8
07/28/2005 12:16 PM

my roommate from freshman year was a country fanatic.



he used to sit there with a 12 inch bowie knife cutting apples, barechested, eating beans.



now he's in the marine corps.



meryl taggart is satan.

Trae Killed Steve 156,790 17
07/28/2005 12:18 PM

<action> looks at thread and who started it





I'm sorry, you lost me at "I work..."

daisypie 49,378 9
07/28/2005 12:20 PM

I work with Millie...

Deepan the Paranoid Android 2,042 8
07/28/2005 12:20 PM

I'm sorry, you lost me at "I work..."



must have been pretty lost then, because i don't see it.

Deepan the Paranoid Android 2,042 8
07/28/2005 12:20 PM

typo. dont know where but it's there.

Mr. Sir 66,722 9
07/28/2005 12:22 PM

The best way to fix your typos would be to stop typing.

Trixxiewan Kenobie 65,026 15
07/28/2005 12:24 PM

We've got one guy up here I worry could snap and go postal. He's like in his 60 and dyes his hair completely brown, real skinny anorexic skinny, horrible hygiene. No social skills whatsoever. Divorced his wife a decade or so back cause she wouldn't give him much sex. Tried the singles scene and discovered no one will give him any sex. Went gaga over this young 22 year old hard body that came to work here and tried to compete for her affections against a 6'6, 200+lb, ultimate fighter. Doesn't wash his hands after he uses the bathroom and then goes and picks a donut or cookie out of the community box. Has never brought in a king cake in all the years he has worked here which is like >20. Nobody goes more than 20 years and never once get the baby.

OneEyedTrouserTrout 6,046 8
07/28/2005 12:31 PM

The guy is a Gabber I take it

Chit Eating Grin 178,776 15
07/28/2005 12:32 PM

Sounds like someone could use a little Scientology in her life!

Deepan the Paranoid Android 2,042 8
07/28/2005 12:34 PM

I know psychology, you don't.

S. Kake 55,555 14
07/28/2005 12:36 PM

I'm on Wellbutrin (antidepressant) and Seroquel (antipsychotic). but I won't take the Seroquel.

Big Irish Guy 203,956 21
07/28/2005 12:38 PM

Good, your posts would start to suck if you did. By the way, see any good ninja sites lately?

Chris Garrett 86,932 12
07/28/2005 12:38 PM

Of course, I was also diagnosed with Panic Disorder, Anxiety Disorder and OCD.





Dude...weren't you in that movie??



Worksafe.

S. Kake 55,555 14
07/28/2005 12:41 PM

The reason I said I was on those meds is because I was trying to figure out who the crazy person is at my work, and I realized I couldn't figure it out because it's me.

Trae Killed Steve 156,790 17
07/28/2005 12:42 PM

There is a guy who works with me from NJ. All he talks about is how great NJ is. He has this irritating boil on his face, he used to have one on his neck but I think it popped. Anyway, he smokes like a chimney... so badly that his fingers are yellow. Oh, and he'll just be sitting there and all of a sudden he belches (so loud that you'd think a car backfired inside)...and goes on working.



When he talks, he pronounces "with" like "wif" and every other word is Frost. It will be all quiet in here and I'll hear him say "Frost-ing Emerson" really loud or "GOD DAMN IT I'M GONNA KILL SOMEONE!!". He is constantly talking to himself a la Office Space.



I'm tempted to give him a red stapler just in case.

Chris Garrett 86,932 12
07/28/2005 12:46 PM

Ummm...I work in VERMONT...not Georgia..

Trae Killed Steve 156,790 17
07/28/2005 12:48 PM

Again with the "I work" thing... YOU'RE CONFUSING ME!

Ditdah 123,110 14
07/28/2005 01:02 PM

I used to work with a pharmacist that snapped. He was always very sweet, kind, polite, and quiet. Then one day, he was working in our IV room, and just got up from his seat and started pulling vials of drugs off of the shelf. He started lining them up in rows on the floor, in height order. We all kinda stared at him, and then each other. Some asked "Mark- what are you doing?" He said "They are tired of helping. They need to sleep." We all walked out of the room and shut the door. We kept watching him through the windows, and when he finished that task he started pulling all the labels off of the shelf bins and putting them on the floor by the vials. So, we called the manager and security, and they took him away. We never heard what actually happened to him, but he never came back to work.

BlaiseMilla 67,037 13
07/28/2005 01:04 PM

Chris- shouldn't you be prank calling her house or her former show for an on-air bit?

Big Irish Guy 203,956 21
07/28/2005 01:07 PM

Trae's so used to being the one with "jobs" to do, she gets confused. He's saying he's employed. Like the rest of your clients.

Freeze Dried Instant Coffee 10,327 12
07/28/2005 01:15 PM

Chris: In my experience with the mentally ill (which doesn't amount to a hill of beans) I'd have to say your co-worker is psychotic, bi-polar, posessed, and just plain batShakespeare.



Dr. FDIC (civil servant of Georgia's mentally ill since 2000).

Release the One Legged Space Chickens 286,527 61
07/28/2005 01:16 PM

Hen and I work with kids who have been sex toys for their birth parents since birth. Yeah, we see some crazy stuff sometimes.



Like the one who had been good for about three months, and came to spend a week with us while her adoptive parents went away together for a break.



We went camping that weekend, and we're all sitting around the campfire when girl goes, "Uh, oh."



What?



"They're back." Very matter of fact. No emotion, just letting us know that the voices were back.



"I have about 5 minutes."



Till what?



She went from normal kid to absolutely bat-Shakespeare in 5 minutes. She knew the timeing. Ended up in a fetal position, screaming her head off. Hauled off in a ambulance.



That kind of thing goes over real well in a family campground.

gorctemp 41,132 13
07/28/2005 01:18 PM

And after she was carted off, ya'll made smores without missing a beat, I presume?

Chris Garrett 86,932 12
07/28/2005 01:18 PM

Dr. FDIC



You bitch.



Why didn't we play that in Boston?

gorctemp 41,132 13
07/28/2005 01:20 PM

Because she left the 12" q-tips to swab your rectum at home?

Freeze Dried Instant Coffee 10,327 12
07/28/2005 01:24 PM

We didn't play that in Boston because you wouldn't let me see your boo-boo.

anonnona 592 8
07/28/2005 01:29 PM

At 10 o'clock, she went outside, to our smoking area, picked up a chair, lofted it over her head, and screamed, "CUUUUUUUUUUUNNNNTTT!" and heaved it as far as she could, then proceeded to kick the building over and over as hard as she could.



Grandma?

Frogpop 173,153 25
07/28/2005 03:09 PM

I would be interested to know if anyone knows what her problem is



Sounds like a clear cut case of too much Carroll, to me.

Duh - I'm not @#%$&*# Dur! 24,152 8
07/28/2005 03:21 PM

Blasphemy Frogpop! You can never have enough Carroll!!!!

Release the One Legged Space Chickens 286,527 61
07/28/2005 03:21 PM

ya'll made smores without missing a beat, I presume?



What else were we to do? I mean, those things are GOOD!

Sharribarri 14,124 11
07/28/2005 03:50 PM

I know a disturbed young man who attempted suicide at 16. When that failed, he decided to "kill" his name instead. He has been known as Mr. Smiley, when he was most certainly not deserving of the name, Green Lightning, and various other random names. He is insistant that he be addressed by them as well, at home, church or even in his college classes.



He once stood and watched me for 30 minutes or an hour. And what was I doing that was so exciting you might ask....well nothing. I was serving food at a cafe. Creepy to say the least. He is no longer allowed to go in that facility or to the local mall after flipping out on the information booth girl. It is sad really, to be so unhappy and to have no end to it in sight.

Declan ('Aaron Altman') McManus. 131,877 36
07/28/2005 03:58 PM

Declan's Common Sense Workplace Observations.



I have worked in fields ranging from Janitorial, to food service, to Social Work.



In janitorial, you're cleaning up physical messes. In social work, emotional/cultural ones. The pay is generally better in janitorial.





1) All workplaces are dysfunctional to a greater or lesser extent. All.



2) There is at least one person in every workplace who does not follow community standards of hygiene.



3) In an organization of greater than 20, there will always be some people in a sexual involvement.



4) Every workplace has a psycho. Whether or not s/he has been officially diagnosed is of no real consequence.



5) Most people (90% and above) feel that the antics in Dilbert accurately reflect their worklives, no matter what job they hold.

DemoMonkey, Pranked by a Master. 166,252 10
07/28/2005 04:05 PM

One of my co-workers has gone on "stress leave". (Her job is no more stressful than all the rest of ours, I might add.) For a while, I thought she was just being moody and contrary. Then I began to suspect her of soem form of machiavellian office politics. And then one day, it came to me in a shining epiphany:



"Oh wait, it's not me. You're just insane."



She come out and start the oddest conversations. You would THINK you were involved in a dialogue at first, only to realize you had about as much input on the conversation as a sock puppet.

Oliverius Chesticus XIV 203,475 12
07/28/2005 04:07 PM

<action> puts down sock puppet



Just what exactly are you trying to say, Monkey man?

DemoMonkey, Pranked by a Master. 166,252 10
07/28/2005 04:10 PM

At the moment I'm debating how to greet her when she returns. (Name changed, of course.)



"Hello Lisa. Get all the crazy out yet?"



or



"Lisa, glad your back. You look nice today. Can I straighten your jacket?"



or possibly



"Hi Lisa. We've gone through your desk and removed all those nasty sharp objects. Her's your work crayon. It's sienna!"

Declan ('Aaron Altman') McManus. 131,877 36
07/28/2005 04:15 PM

It's Sienna!





But not Burnt Sienna, we don't want you playing with hot things and getting hurt!

Mr. Sir 66,722 9
07/28/2005 04:27 PM

machiavellian office politics.





I have a bizarre disorder that makes me laugh whenever somebody uses the word "machiavellian" That's just a funny word to me.



The only way that it would be better, is if you were to use it in a sentance as "monkeyvellian"

Dianada 57,835 108
07/28/2005 05:44 PM

Monkeychlorian?

Mr. Sir 66,722 9
07/28/2005 06:05 PM

use it in a sentance as "monkeyvellian"



You know what would be even better?



If I knew how to spell sentence.





I'm under too much stress at work right now.

Hammerhead 59,399 14
07/28/2005 08:58 PM

I worked at a restaurant with a chick that, for all outword appearances was normal. My co-workers and I were all of the same temperment and ilk that our senses of humor matched well. We didn't think anything of her.



She slowly deteriorated over a couple months. It began with being late, and Frost-ing up on the job. Nothing big, because we all have some problem where we're a few minutes late every now and then. It progressed to calling in half days for no apparent reason and having severe sweeping mood swings. From happy go lucky to murderous in minutes.



Luckily, I wasn't there the night she snapped. I think she snapped in the parking lot after her shift, and ended up going home to finiShakespeare before being put in the hospital. She came back to work a couple weeks later to work a couple nights and then quit for no reason.



I heard afterwords that she had some distorted feelings for me and wanted to stalk me, but couldn't because no one would tell her where I lived, and she never thought to follow me home. I was never aware of this Shakespeare. Nor did I ever do anything to encourage it.

Millie 116,988 28
07/28/2005 10:21 PM

She come out and start the oddest conversations. You would THINK you were involved in a dialogue at first, only to realize you had about as much input on the conversation as a sock puppet.



She's obviously used to conversations like that--she must be married.

Tingles 2,134 8
07/28/2005 11:01 PM

I used to work with a guy a liked to call "Agent Orange". He was a Vietnam veteran that would fly off the handle over the smallest things. I'm amazed that he hasn't taken everybody out yet....talk about stress in the work place!

Neep, I want to lick Chris Garrett's knees! 35,066 15
07/29/2005 01:42 AM

Jaggy. But I don't work with her anymore. Everyone I work with is pretty sane, all the crazy people work across the road at KFC.

dapinklady 461 7
07/29/2005 02:57 PM

well this girl who was meant to be my friend has behaviour probs and on boxing day a few years back she tried to do my head in with a brick, i had to get a taxi driver to help me. then the police came and arrested her, and the last year she sent me a text saying "i know who you are, do you know who i am" i said i dunno, then she said "i wanna know where our frendship is" i replied "what friendship" never heared from her since

dapinklady 461 7
07/29/2005 02:57 PM

well this girl who was meant to be my friend has behaviour probs and on boxing day a few years back she tried to do my head in with a brick, i had to get a taxi driver to help me. then the police came and arrested her, and the last year she sent me a text saying "i know who you are, do you know who i am" i said i dunno, then she said "i wanna know where our frendship is" i replied "what friendship" never heared from her since

dapinklady 461 7
07/29/2005 02:59 PM

sorry for the double post, my computers running slow.

Release the One Legged Space Chickens 286,527 61
07/29/2005 03:15 PM

I heard afterwords that she had some distorted feelings for me and wanted to stalk me



Man she was crazy.

dapinklady 461 7
07/29/2005 04:18 PM

This happened to you twice?

no only the once, it was near a pub we just had a walk through the nature trail

Coco 1,756 8
07/29/2005 07:44 PM

There are a few psychos in my town.



1) The Sorry-To-Bother-You Guy: enters the shops with an ominous-looking suitcase, a badly done combover (is there such a thing as a well-done combover?) and a suit with an old-fashioned satin bow tie. He proceeds to poke people on the shoulder from behind, lean around to nearly touch noses with his victim and says 'Sorry to bother you. Did I bother you? Sorry to bother you.' He does this until he gets kicked out of the shop.



2) The 'I'm A Naughty Boy' Guy: Pretty simple. He'll find the most crowded area in town (he favours holiday seasons, more children) and start singing to no particular tune 'I'm a nauuuughty boy, nauuuughty boy, naughty boy, naughtynaughtynaughty boy'. He sometimes even dances. It's even more fun to watch when he gets some of the children joining in.



3) The Musical Character: He busks in the middle of town - i.e. plays music in order to get money. He looks similarly dishevelled as the 'Sorry-to-bother-you' guy. Unfortunately, this guy does not play any instrument. He tends to get his clarinet out, puff his cheeks out and blow as hard as possible. He'll then move his fingers over the keys as if he knows how to play. This produces a sound akin to a mouse on speed (or how I'd imagine said mouse to sound), including the different pitches which are a consequence of haphazardly pressing the shiny buttons on the instrument. It sounds like nails on a chalkboard. He is the least popular of the local crazy guys.



4) Jeebus: A tramp who wears an enormous beanie (stuffed with who-knows-what, I shudder to imagine) on one side of his head. He limps around town with his rolling shopping bag, and walks up and down the stairs of the local mall. A lot. According to other onlookers, when asked what he is doing, he has replied 'I'm Jesus. I'm walking'. Yeah, scary.

dropkick brody 43,090 12
07/29/2005 07:54 PM

My personal favourite is:



Insane Italian Drunk Dancer. He's the guy that comes up to you when your minding your own buiness and tries to get you to dance with him. To no music. He has an aging lothario image perfectly complimented by a crusty denim jacket and sparse curly hair. He makes no bones about staring at your boobs.

Coco 1,756 8
07/29/2005 08:03 PM

Brody - every town should have one.

Coco 1,756 8
07/29/2005 08:04 PM

Weirdly enough, I've only ever met the IIDD type in France.

Neep, I want to lick Chris Garrett's knees! 35,066 15
07/29/2005 08:55 PM

In our capital city, Wellington, there is a homeless guy who volunteers for everything. Last time I was in town he was trying to get people to sign up on the electarol role because the election is coming up. The time before that, he was collecting for Women's Refuge. I was aswell, but a couple of streets away.

Armored 3,923 8
07/29/2005 09:28 PM

I work with a girl who, on her third or fourth day of work, told me she wanted to sleep with me AND the other assistant manager...



...at the same time.



Eeuughhhh. I think that's how you spell my reaction.

Whistler P. McManus 186,041 44
07/29/2005 10:46 PM

3) The Musical Character: He busks in the middle of town - i.e. plays music in order to get money. He looks similarly dishevelled as the 'Sorry-to-bother-you' guy. Unfortunately, this guy does not play any instrument. He tends to get his clarinet out, puff his cheeks out and blow as hard as possible. He'll then move his fingers over the keys as if he knows how to play. This produces a sound akin to a mouse on speed (or how I'd imagine said mouse to sound), including the different pitches which are a consequence of haphazardly pressing the shiny buttons on the instrument. It sounds like nails on a chalkboard. He is the least popular of the local crazy guys.



Coco? Are you sure you know the difference between a clarinet and a fife?

Return of the Son of The Rockin' Donkey 77,546 17
07/29/2005 10:53 PM

One of the contractors we have at work suggested that TTJ and I could put one of the kids in a car being pulled behind the U-Haul we were going to use to move her here.



The guy actually thought it was a good idea.