Senior Destructor: International Heartthrob 60,724 12
08/12/2005 04:17 PM

Bathtub

Children's bath toys

New towel

50 gallons of silken tofu.

Bizzaro Duh 24,152 8
08/12/2005 04:19 PM

Bleach

Fertilizer

Fireworks

Lighter fluid

No Lloydering 48,662 14
08/12/2005 04:20 PM

Flour

Sugar

Salt

Powdered Milk



She might panic becaue I FORGOT TO GET THE YEAST AND MY BREAD WON'T RISE!

Cruising for a Boozing 9,993 12
08/12/2005 04:20 PM

Turnip

Apple Corer

Vaseline

'A Muppets Christmas Carol' DVD

Erika the killjoy 76,152 9
08/12/2005 04:22 PM

<action> posts this just for Oliver



Dog treats

A squeaky toy

Pliers

A ballpeen hammer

BlaiseMilla 67,037 13
08/12/2005 04:23 PM

3 cases of cheap beer.

1 package condoms.



Just have a bunch of 13 year old girls stand in line with you while you buy it, giggling nervously.

Oliver Chesticles 203,475 12
08/12/2005 04:23 PM

Small Tangent:



When I was 18, my mom made me go to the store to buy a couple things. The list included "Toilet Paper" and "Eggs."



This wouldn't have been too big of a deal, but it was Halloween.



After convincing the store clerk that I had no plans for the eggs or TP, except to eventually whipe my ass with the TP, he finally let me purchase them. But he wouldn't give me a grocery bag.



I never went to the store for my mom again.

Professor Nutbutter 181,311 35
08/12/2005 04:23 PM

Duct tape

Chef's knife

video camera

Copy of today's New York Times.

WhyMe 276 10
08/12/2005 04:23 PM

Pregnancy test

Wire Hangers

Towel

First Aid book

No Lloydering 48,662 14
08/12/2005 04:23 PM

I also forgot the letter s.

Bizzaro Duh 24,152 8
08/12/2005 04:23 PM

Obviously I'm Ted Kaczynski's only protg.

gorcjuice 41,132 13
08/12/2005 04:26 PM

Whole frozen chicken

Personal lubricant

Condoms

Spray can of chocolate whipped cream

Big Irish Guy 203,956 21
08/12/2005 04:27 PM

O'Douls

Labatt's NA

Kaliber

Busch NA

Oliver Chesticles 203,475 12
08/12/2005 04:27 PM

One dozen eggs

Saran wrap

Cough syrup

tub of margerine

Everyones Grudge 2,480 11
08/12/2005 04:28 PM

Condoms

Joy Jelly

Spermacide

Dog food

Professor Nutbutter 181,311 35
08/12/2005 04:29 PM

Dog leash

rubbing alcohol

band aids

peanut butter

gorcjuice 41,132 13
08/12/2005 04:31 PM

1 pack baby bottles

1 gallon milk

1 box trash bags (black)

1 box rat poison

Bizzaro Duh 24,152 8
08/12/2005 04:31 PM

Cold Medecine

Ammonia

Brand New Set of Glassware

Ziplock Bags - The Small Ones

BlaiseMilla 67,037 13
08/12/2005 04:33 PM

Ski mask

Gloves

Water pistol

no 4th item needed

Professor Nutbutter 181,311 35
08/12/2005 04:33 PM

Pot roast

Condoms

Lipstick

Anti-bacterial soap

DemoMonkey, Pranked by a Master. 166,252 10
08/12/2005 04:33 PM

Diesel Fuel

Fertilizer

Alarm Clock

Q'uran

Trae - Please return me to my upright position 156,790 17
08/12/2005 04:35 PM

Tampons

Midol

Rubber gloves

A gun

No Lloydering 48,662 14
08/12/2005 04:35 PM

Yellow dishwashing gloves

Super heavy flow maxi pads

An apron

Condoms

Big Irish Guy 203,956 21
08/12/2005 04:35 PM

Map of Maine

Shovel

Tarp

Box of Depends

No Lloydering 48,662 14
08/12/2005 04:37 PM

Popsicle

Ice Cream

Coke

Chocolate bar



OH MY GOD! YOU'RE GOING TO ROT YOUR TEETH OUT OF YOUR HEAD!

Professor Nutbutter 181,311 35
08/12/2005 04:38 PM

Aunt Jamima instant pancake mix

Blueberries

Maple syrup

Ex-Lax

Cruising for a Boozing 9,993 12
08/12/2005 04:39 PM

This one just came to mind as I'm heading to the pub



12" Salami

1 Set of Coveralls

5kg Cooking Grease

Roofies

Bizzaro Duh 24,152 8
08/12/2005 04:39 PM

Gasoline

Glass Bottles

Cloth Rags

Matches

Trae - Please return me to my upright position 156,790 17
08/12/2005 04:40 PM

A cucumber

Bottle of astroglide

Dog chew toy

A shoe horn

Fluorescent Sombrero 91,274 10
08/12/2005 04:42 PM

Psuedoephedrine

Iodine

Box of Matches (Red Phosphorus)

Lightbulbs





The Nasty girl behind the counter would grow ecstatic, Having the urge to smoke Crystal Meth as well.

Big Irish Guy 203,956 21
08/12/2005 04:42 PM

Flowers

Chocolate

Wine

Happy 4th Birthday Card

gorcjuice 41,132 13
08/12/2005 04:42 PM

While shopping at a Wal-mart near DC:



Shotgun

Box of shells

Hacksaw

Tourist map of the area

Professor Nutbutter 181,311 35
08/12/2005 04:44 PM

Bread crumbs

Meat loaf seasoning mix

Ketchup

Can of Alpo

BlaiseMilla 67,037 13
08/12/2005 04:44 PM

buy 3 bosex of sleeping pills and then order a cake from the bakery with , "Happy Suicide to Me" written on top.

Trae - Please return me to my upright position 156,790 17
08/12/2005 04:49 PM

Large bottle of Vaseline Intensive Care lotion



100ft roll of green plastic garbage bags



Large bottle of Canola/Veggie oil blend



Garden hose

DemoMonkey, Pranked by a Master. 166,252 10
08/12/2005 04:49 PM

Wooden Skewers

Kraft Caramels

Red Apples

Razor Blades

Cruising for a Boozing 9,993 12
08/12/2005 04:50 PM

Carjack

Funnel

2l Whiskey

Stomach Pump

HartmanTwins 10,131 10
08/12/2005 04:55 PM

Jar of mayo

2 inch wide round cookie cutter

Rubber band

Poster of Orlando Bloom's Headshot

DemoMonkey, Pranked by a Master. 166,252 10
08/12/2005 04:56 PM

Canned Mandarin Orange Slices

Rainbow Miniature Marshmallows

Cherry Jello

Enema Kit

Big Irish Guy 203,956 21
08/12/2005 04:58 PM

Machete

Goalie Mask

Map to Crystal Lake

Immortality

Chickens 286,527 61
08/12/2005 05:01 PM

5 packages of Sudafed

Erika the killjoy 76,152 9
08/12/2005 05:01 PM

Cake mix



'Happy Birthday Dad!' card



Wrapping paper and a big red bow



Box of condoms

HartmanTwins 10,131 10
08/12/2005 05:02 PM

Ice cream

Candy

Childrens Night time tylenol

3 hour video tape

Professor Nutbutter 181,311 35
08/12/2005 05:02 PM

case of hammers

Canvas sack

"Counting for Dummies" book

North Carolina road atlas

HartmanTwins 10,131 10
08/12/2005 05:05 PM

Chocolate Chip Cookies

Any Hugh Grant Movie

Cosmo

A 12 pack of AA batteries

HartmanTwins 10,131 10
08/12/2005 05:08 PM

Snorkel

Underwater Camera

Lotion

Free AOL cd without 100 bonus hours

HartmanTwins 10,131 10
08/12/2005 05:12 PM

Wig

Raw Chicken Breast

99 cent Polyester Panties

New York Times Personal Ads

Fluorescent Sombrero 91,274 10
08/12/2005 05:13 PM

3 Frozen Concentrated Orange Juice mixes

Gasoline

S>H>P 181,790 70
08/12/2005 05:14 PM

Lotion

Basket

Rope

Lipstick

DemoMonkey, Pranked by a Master. 166,252 10
08/12/2005 05:19 PM

Muffin Tin

Blueberries

Muffin Mix

"Ventriloquism for Dummies"

19 8
08/12/2005 05:38 PM

Holy Shakespeare, a funny joke!





(Nice one Demo)

TheBoB666 70 7
08/12/2005 05:47 PM

Candles

Wine

Lube

Pineapple

gorcjuice 41,132 13
08/12/2005 05:51 PM

<action>takes a deep breath</action>This reminds me of the Nip/Tuck episode where the doctors have to dispose of a dead mob guy and the doctor with kids remembers his son saying that alligators love pork so they throw the body in the trunk and go to the store and buy a shopping cart full of hams and a roll of twine then drive out to the Everglades and tie all the hams tightly to the body and throw in the swamp and alligators go nuts eating it.

gorcjuice 41,132 13
08/12/2005 05:52 PM

<action>passes out</action>

Everyones Grudge 2,480 11
08/12/2005 05:52 PM

Hat, 80% of GAB is dangerously stupid. Little more then 4% will know that that makes napalm.

Freeze Dried Instant Coffee 10,327 12
08/12/2005 05:53 PM

ExLax

AstroGlide

Condoms

Grape Jelly

Jilly 24,693 8
08/12/2005 06:09 PM

Pantyhose

black spray paint

latex gloves

map of city (which will lead to ex husband's new home with new gal pal)

Filly 39,193 20
08/12/2005 06:13 PM

Depends

A "Happy 80th Birthday!" card

Batteries for a hearing aid

Clear duct tape

Health Is Bad For Your Smoking 138 8
08/12/2005 06:15 PM

Skinning knive

"Skinning for dummies" guide

Sewing kit

Silence of the lambs DVD

rashmathai 81 7
08/12/2005 06:18 PM

happy tree friends dvd

a book on faulty wireing

16 mice

a video camera

Chris Garrettt 86,932 12
08/12/2005 06:24 PM

<action>Goes shopping before heading to New Jersey</action>



Duct tape

Ballpeen Hammer

Nail clippers

Map of Clayton, NJ

Chris Garrettt 86,932 12
08/12/2005 06:26 PM

Box of Depends

Astroglide

Hearing Aid Batteries

Denture cup

Big Irish Guy 203,956 21
08/12/2005 06:28 PM

Shovel

Lube

"Sorry for your Loss Card"

Map to Cemetary

johnnykielbasa2000 15,703 0
08/12/2005 06:53 PM

one banana

one egg

one slice of cheese

one disposable camera

Declan ('Aaron Altman') McManus. 131,877 36
08/13/2005 01:10 AM

Cascade Complete dishwasher powder, large box



Purina Puppy Chow, large bag for large breed puppies



2 bottles Martinelli's Sparkling Cider



Live lobsters (2)

AussieSarah 8,390 9
08/13/2005 01:42 AM

You only need 2 items to get a deviate look from a checkout person.

DemoMonkey, Pranked by a Master. 166,252 10
08/13/2005 01:40 PM

Bagels

Matzoh

Gefilte Fish

Bacon

RedstaR I wish I was an oscar mayer winer 1,068 8
08/13/2005 01:55 PM

depleted uranium

detonator coil

heavy duty rubber gloves

50 feet wire

Livewire the Kelly Girl 78,229 13
08/13/2005 03:04 PM

Ex-lax

enema kit

caffeine pills

any fashion magazine

Livewire the Kelly Girl 78,229 13
08/13/2005 03:07 PM

3 bags of scotch mints

slingshot



(I have actually done this one)

Uncle Pie 26,981 11
08/13/2005 03:17 PM

one bourbon

one scotch

one beer

straws

Pistol in Pink 10,071 9
08/13/2005 03:18 PM

Astroglide

Astroglide

Astroglide

Cucumber

Uncle Pie 26,981 11
08/13/2005 03:21 PM

A Jackie Collins novel

KY jelly

silly putty

wet wipes

Pistol in Pink 10,071 9
08/13/2005 03:25 PM

Or perhaps . . .



Astroglide

Astroglide

Astroglide

Baseball bat

Bothered 167 8
08/13/2005 03:30 PM

Turkey Baster

KY Jelly

Home Pregnancy Test

Egg Timer

Uncle Pie 26,981 11
08/13/2005 03:44 PM

lock pick

20 pound maul

shovel

quick set concrete

Smart Choice 1,296 9
08/13/2005 03:47 PM

lubricant

panty hose

lipstick

hamster

Bothered 167 8
08/13/2005 03:52 PM

lubricant

panty hose

lipstick

hamster



OK I get the other three, but what is the lubricant for?

Smart Choice 1,296 9
08/13/2005 03:56 PM

A jammed door.

Bothered 167 8
08/13/2005 04:00 PM

Phew, for a second there I thought you were going to try to jam a tube of lipstick up a hamster's ass and make it wear pantyhose.

LLLLLLLLL 48,662 14
05/10/2006 02:33 PM

NO! I want to bump this one instead. I've made up my mind.