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I moved four TONS on my lunch hour today!
A comedy conversation by Chris Garrett 86,932 12
08/30/2005 09:54 PM 407 views
I'm out on the road today, and as I am heading back to the hotel, I drive past my father-in-law's house.



From where I was, I saw that there was a pallet of something in the driveway, then I remembered....



last night, my wife told me that her dad was getting a load of pellets for his wood stove, and if I had time, could I help him move it into the shed?



So..being the nice guy I am, when I got back to the hotel, I called him, and asked if he needed any help, to which he said, yes, he'd be grateful.



I go over there, and I notice that there is not one, but FOUR pallets...50 bags to a pallet, 40 pounds per bag.



That's a ton, per pallet, four tons, eight THOUSAND pounds.



Oh yeah, he just had rotator cuff surgery, so I had to do it all alone.



Took me about an hour, and now I cannot breathe without severe back pain.



After I was done, I called my wife, and told her that she owes me a BIG favor, to which she said, "ok."



So...GABbers, what do I ask for?

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Hilarious 7 votes 4.3 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1272856
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33 Comments on "

I moved four TONS on my lunch hour today!

"
(Funniest: Prof. Fantabulous,Whistler P. McManus,daisypie)


Side-splitting 42 votes 5.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1272859
Prof. Fantabulous 19,711 13
08/30/2005 09:56 PM

a divorce
 

Chuckleworthy 2 votes 2.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1272862
Mr Fook 4,016 9
08/30/2005 09:56 PM

Does she have any hot friends and/or sisters?
 

Hilarious 7 votes 4.5 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1272863
Chris Garrett 86,932 12
08/30/2005 09:58 PM

Fook no.
 

Hilarious 7 votes 4.1 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1272864
The High Priestess of Stewie 58,884 29
08/30/2005 09:58 PM

String her up by her ankels from the celeling and make her give you a rim job.



























What?
 

Funny 3 votes 3.3 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1272865
Tingles 2,134 8
08/30/2005 09:58 PM

So...GABbers, what do I ask for?



A blowjob....duh!
 

Amusing 2 votes 1.5 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1272867
Mr Fook 4,016 9
08/30/2005 09:59 PM

Starts with B...ends in J....
 

Hilarious 8 votes 4.5 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1272868
Mr Fook 4,016 9
08/30/2005 10:00 PM

curseded 56k!
 

Side-splitting 29 votes 5.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1272870
Whistler P. McManus 186,041 44
08/30/2005 10:00 PM

A week in Myrtle Beach - just you and your son.
 

Funny 4 votes 3.7 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1272871
Tingles 2,134 8
08/30/2005 10:01 PM

So..being the nice guy I am, when I got back to the hotel, I called him, and asked if he needed any help...



No good deed goes unpunished!
 

Hilarious 11 votes 4.9 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1272872
Chris Garrett 86,932 12
08/30/2005 10:01 PM

You know, I think this is a good a time as any to bring this up....





I have noticed that since I have been back from vacation, the Chris Garrett(t) clickie count has been broken.



I am in pain here....fill my tube you cheap Carrolls.
 

Hilarious 8 votes 4.5 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1272873
johnnykielbasa2000 15,703 0
08/30/2005 10:03 PM

Please ask her for a blank check so you can pay me for all those undeserved clickies I gave you. Let's see........ $20 X Zero = Nevermind
 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1272874
Mr Fook 4,016 9
08/30/2005 10:03 PM

Yes Lord Muffaur!
 

Side-splitting 21 votes 5.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1272875
Tingles 2,134 8
08/30/2005 10:04 PM

eight THOUSAND pounds...



What's the big deal? You lift more than that just getting out of the bed in the morning!
 

Funny 3 votes 3.7 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1272876
Chris Garrett 86,932 12
08/30/2005 10:04 PM

Whistler.....Have I told....you lately....that I love you?
 

Hilarious 10 votes 4.8 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1272878
Chris Garrett 86,932 12
08/30/2005 10:05 PM

Tingles, who the Frost invited you to GAB, anyway?



Whoever it is, is an Emerson.
 

Hilarious 3 votes 4.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1272879
Mr Fook 4,016 9
08/30/2005 10:07 PM

<action>puts popcorn in the microwave, gets comfortable, grabs an umbrella and waits for Trae to post.
 

Funny 2 votes 3.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1272881
Declan McManus, Vice Promotion Squad 131,877 36
08/30/2005 10:08 PM

Parents? I was convinced that she was spawned, like a salmon.
 

Hilarious 30 votes 4.8 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1272885
daisypie 49,378 9
08/30/2005 10:09 PM

I moved four TONS on my lunch hour today!



Big deal... Ernie Ford loaded 16 TONS, and what did he get?

Another day older and deeper in debt!
 

Hilarious 6 votes 4.7 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1272888
Tingles 2,134 8
08/30/2005 10:11 PM

Tingles, who the Frost invited you to GAB, anyway?





It was this Emerson!
 

Hilarious 7 votes 4.1 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1272889
Chit Eating Grin 178,776 15
08/30/2005 10:13 PM

I was sure by the title that this was another C.G. Poop story.
 

Hilarious 6 votes 4.4 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1272897
Mwahiy: The Bitter, Sexually Frustrated One 5,425 9
08/30/2005 10:21 PM

What's the big deal? You lift more than that just getting out of the bed in the morning!





I think Tingles was referring to the immense size of your naughty bits. But, I dunno.
 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1272902
daisypie 49,378 9
08/30/2005 10:24 PM

$50 says that song makes it on to Garrett's playlist tomorrow...
 

Funny 1 votes 3.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1272905
Cruz FB 9,993 12
08/30/2005 10:29 PM

When I read this thread title I figured you were a cab driver and you'd picked up my mother on your lunch break.





My mistake
 

Hilarious 4 votes 4.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1272921
Frank SiNapkin 30,762 12
08/30/2005 10:43 PM

I thought this thread was about food.



Fatty.
 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1273027
Frogpop 173,153 25
08/31/2005 12:37 AM

Ask for a donation to this year's Gab/Heifer International Charity Project.
 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1273236
HartmanTwins 10,131 10
08/31/2005 09:50 AM

<action>doesn't read thread </action>



Four tons? I didn't know the body could produce that much semen.
 

Chuckleworthy 1 votes 2.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1273237
HartmanTwins 10,131 10
08/31/2005 09:51 AM

<action> reads thread</action>



...ok...



I haven't been this way off since I bought Windows XP.
 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1273361
Pubah 56,805 18
08/31/2005 01:16 PM

<action>Is disappointed</action>



I thought it would be a PooP story.
 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1277218
johnnykielbasa2000 15,703 0
09/07/2005 04:03 PM

This thread deserves more attention.
 

Funny 3 votes 3.7 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1277229
OneEyedTrouserTrout 6,046 8
09/07/2005 04:18 PM

What a coincidence. I Shakespeare out four tons of pellets this morning
 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1277238
Andrews mum - formerly known as 'babe' 55 7
09/07/2005 04:25 PM

Ask for your father-in-law's wood stove...





and for her to move the pellets to your place
 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1277256
La Petite Mort de TableTopJane 173,958 15
09/07/2005 04:43 PM

Tell her she has to pay for you to get one massage a week from a hot foreign chick for 6 months. WITH the happy ending. This is the only way your back will heal.
 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1277301
rashmathai 81 7
09/07/2005 05:17 PM

well, as a return favor, your wife should have hot kinky sex with a pair of socks and a turtle.then she love you long time ^^
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