Witty Responses
A comedy conversation
by OneEyedTrouserTrout  6,046  8
09/14/2005 05:19 PM 1207 views
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We have this Frost-ing over-the-edge bleeding heart councilwoman in my town who has gone on record as to wanting to provide abandoned cars to house the local population of homeless dirtbags. Note: These are the type that hang out with a sign on the freeway off ramps, not New Orleans flood victims)
Anyhow, I happened to be near city hall when she was being interviewed for TV. After the interview the reporter asked me what I thought of her proposal. My response:
"I think Councilwoman Hartzell has a great idea. She obviously cares deeply for our dwellingly challenged, I personally wish encourage anyone who has access to a junked vehicle to drop it at her residence. I'm sure your viewers will support her in this endeavor"
My comment made the 5, 6, and 11 pm news. It even had the anchorman smirking.
So, a friend just called me and said that on the noon news today the station aired a rebuttal of sorts saying that Councilwoman Hartzell contacted them and stated she did not intend for this plan to be implemented in a residential neighborhood and pleaded for people to stop dropping off cars at her residence.
Possibly my greatest Frost you ever. So, what kind of witty responses have you come up with?
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Like This? Rate It!
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Hilarious
25 votes
4.4
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Hilarious
12 votes
4.0
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Oliver Chest: Vlaccid Boner 203,475  12
09/14/2005 05:20 PM
Someone called me a jerk once, so I killed him.
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Funny
3 votes
3.3
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Munkus 2,801 10
09/14/2005 05:20 PM
When anybody argues with you about anything or they're getting mad and generally going off on one I usually just make a high pitched screech like at the back of my throat along the lines of:
"EEEEEEEEEHHHH"
If that doesnt shut them up then it sure as hell makes them forget what theyre on about.
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Hilarious
5 votes
4.0
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Oliver Chest: Vlaccid Boner 203,475 12
09/14/2005 05:21 PM
Also, I'm calling fat daughter on this story until you find a link to some video.
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Chuckleworthy
1 votes
2.0
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Munkus 2,801 10
09/14/2005 05:21 PM
Someone called me a jerk once, so I killed him
He said witty responses, not felony responses.
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Side-splitting
1 votes
5.0
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SHP, now with more P! 181,790 70
09/14/2005 05:23 PM
I usually just log-off of IM.
Oh, you mean in real life? Yeah. What's that like?
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0 votes
0.0
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johnnykielbasa2000 15,703 0
09/14/2005 05:23 PM
Does Councilwoman Hartzell have big tits??
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Chuckleworthy
1 votes
2.0
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No_Key_Bandit 76,490 10
09/14/2005 05:47 PM
"He said witty responses, not felony responses."
Potato - Potahto
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Hilarious
3 votes
4.0
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OneEyedTrouserTrout 6,046 8
09/14/2005 05:48 PM
Tits are OK. But she doesn't shave her legs and I have my doubts about her bathing habits. Oh, and she bats for the other team
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0 votes
0.0
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johnnykielbasa2000 15,703 0
09/14/2005 06:07 PM
I vote for Councilwoman Hartzell then. And now I shall go eat supper.
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0 votes
0.0
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Senior Destructor: Frontman of Vlaccid. 60,724 12
09/14/2005 08:42 PM
Trout lives in Ashland?
Are you one of the naked hippies that hang out in the park?
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0 votes
0.0
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supergrover 4,517 9
09/14/2005 08:43 PM
Seriously, we need video.
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Funny
1 votes
3.0
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Senior Destructor: Frontman of Vlaccid. 60,724 12
09/14/2005 08:44 PM
Not of the naked hippies in the park, I hope, cause they're all old and nasty.
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0 votes
0.0
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Ditdah 123,110 14
09/14/2005 08:45 PM
Young hippies smell like patchouli.
What do old hippies smell like?
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Funny
2 votes
3.5
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Zolton 88,175 34
09/14/2005 08:47 PM
Stale weed and Milk of Magnesia.
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0 votes
0.0
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supergrover 4,517 9
09/14/2005 08:48 PM
Also, is it weird that I forget all my best moments? My worst I will remember on my death bed, but my best just kind of disappear.
I say this because at first I was excited. Ooh, I have so many good comeback moments. And then I actually tried to think, and it's a big blank spot.
I used to smoke pot, I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna, defend myself. I'm not gonna, defend this shirt.................About a week after I stopped smoking I thought I was psychic. I would be thinking where did I put my keys? Oh yeah, in my pocket...How did I know that!
<Nick Schwartzman>
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Side-splitting
2 votes
5.0
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Jim-Bob's Pants 2,255 8
09/14/2005 08:50 PM
I call shenanigans! Note the year.
For shame.
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0 votes
0.0
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Nathyn 0 0
09/14/2005 08:56 PM
Millie
9/13/2005 2:43 pm
I'm not angry about it. I was just stating a fact. Men are pigs.
None of you can refute that fact.
Nathyn
9/13/2005 9:29 pm
Ayo Millie!
You aint got no dick so this is out of your jurishdickshun!
he he!
good times...
yeh
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