The Baptist 1,672 8
12/20/2005 03:22 PM

"Ahhhhhhhhh Motherland!"

Erika - Always on the Naughty List 76,152 9
12/20/2005 03:25 PM

I didn't even notice the Santa. I fixed in on the two dogs in the back hungrily eyeing up the other dog's proudly presented ass. I'm not sure what that says about me.

Chit Eating Grin 178,781 15
12/20/2005 08:02 PM

Santa was forced to start early this year as toy soldiers have grown so big and lifelike, that he can only fit a few in his bag at a time.

Slip and slide Suhypa 5,547 9
12/20/2005 08:40 PM

In Soviet Russia, Santa gets presents from you... or you end up in a Gulag.

No One's Horse 294 8
12/20/2005 09:13 PM

Another year sees the Bolsheviks in second to last place at the Iditarod. Some speculate human team was too many while the dog team was too few. Others say their equipment was not up to snuff for this grueling run. But we at ESPN 8 feel that no amount of costuming by the team leader is going to compensate for the lack of morale necessary to sustain a lead in this frozen tundra.

Chit Eating Grin 178,781 15
12/20/2005 09:25 PM

Dog #2 : I swear those Frosters in the sled are right up my ass every time I look back. Shakespeare, get a life !

Visions of SuGarD Pantsed in their Beds 2,724 8
12/20/2005 10:16 PM

So be good, for goodness' sake.

Visions of SuGarD Pantsed in their Beds 2,724 8
12/20/2005 10:20 PM

Together now!



You better watch out

You better not cry

Better not pout

I'm telling you why

Santa Claus is coming to town



He's making a list,

And checking it twice;

Gonna find out Who's naughty and nice.

Santa Claus is coming to town



He sees you when you're sleeping

He knows when you're awake

He knows if you've been bad or good

So be good for goodness sake!



O! You better watch out!

You better not cry.

Better not pout, I'm telling you why.



Santa Claus is coming to town.

Santa Claus is coming to town.

Mofo Pees on Santa's Lap 10,950 10
12/20/2005 10:25 PM

Santa pulls out his 'little friend':



"Betryal of the glorious Red Army will NOT be tollerated! Filthy Dogs! Get back here and pull this sled! Deserters will be shot! Must we make an example of you as we did Rudolph?"





In Communist Russia, sled pull YOU!

Dogs Akimbo 211,584 32
12/20/2005 10:56 PM

In Soviet Santaland, Stupid Picture captions You!

It's beginning to look a lot like Frogpop 173,153 25
12/20/2005 11:34 PM

In Postsoviet Russia oligarchs loot the people's socialist nation state.

AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR!

scrap104 3 7
12/21/2005 09:38 PM

Ho Ho Ho!

Festive Filly 39,193 20
12/21/2005 10:18 PM

This capcon went dumb a lot faster than most do. Took less than ten posts! New record, guys!

Mr.Glass 25,340 11
12/22/2005 02:19 AM

"Having finally resurrected Stalin from his deathly slumber, the Tolstoy Twins and their master race to destroy happiness and the spirit of giving... forever."

PRAIRIEMULE 334 7
12/22/2005 06:58 PM

Due to disappointing online sales the marketing team at LLBean has taken drastic measures to pursuade Santa to give out more gift cards. After short sales goal meeting with seinor staff executives, Santa is dispatched outside with 2 interns and attach a team of Huskies to Santa's balls dragging him through the snow to drive the message home.

PRAIRIEMULE 334 7
12/22/2005 07:06 PM

Due to changes in demographics and societal norms. Cabela's issues it's first christmas catalog that caters exclusively to the active outdoor lifestyles of Homosexuals.

PRAIRIEMULE 334 7
12/22/2005 07:16 PM

It's Red Dawn Charlie Brown!

Duffy Bomb 17 7
12/22/2005 08:01 PM

"See, Joey, I TOLD you he's not real! It's all a lie!"

Babage 12 7
12/23/2005 03:17 AM

Santa has recently decided to become a bad ass, disposing of his deers and replacing them with some L33T wolves and also joining the NRA becoming a gun wielding maniac.



Note From The NRA: HEY KIDS, Guns are K3WL cos Santa says so!

SaiSei 39 7
12/23/2005 08:27 AM

J.Peterman Catalogue

24 December 2005.



It was Christmas Eve. The frozen tundra glittered blindingly ahead as I forged my way through the treacherous barren wilderness of Alaska. The majestic beasts before me toiled against the slippery slope...and my two helpers (Missionaries from my previous sojourn to Africa)hung bravely to my back against the whipping wind. It was only Providence--and my double-suede, fleece-lined micro-mesh sledding coat (Winter Cherry, available in sizes S,M,L,XL,XXL,XXXL,XXXXL and Bumble)--that delivered me safe and warm to my destination that night.



And a Merry Christmas was had by all.

No_Key_Bandit 76,490 10
12/23/2005 10:38 AM

Wow Santa!



You brought me an AK-47 for Christmas?



Not the gun, just the bullets!

Darrin 21,346 0
12/23/2005 10:42 AM

"You can't have it kid. You'll shoot your eye out."

TableTopJane-Can I jingle your balls? 173,958 15
12/23/2005 11:20 AM

Are they related to you, Mailman?

Gardenghoul 18 7
12/24/2005 06:34 AM

After the breakdown of labor negotiations in the north pole, Santa finds a cheaper alternative.

Gardenghoul 18 7
12/24/2005 06:38 AM

Santa is being forced to reveal the location of bad little boys and girls, after recently being captured by the Russian police.

Gardenghoul 18 7
12/24/2005 06:40 AM

Due to recent complaints in Russia, that coal is a nonrenewable resource, Santa has been forced to organize small strike forces to weed out

bad little boys and girls.

Gardenghoul 18 7
12/24/2005 06:49 AM

Santa needs eyeglasses for christmas.

Gardenghoul 18 7
12/24/2005 07:03 AM

Santa's less well-to-do (and slightly retarded) Russian brother.

Gardenghoul 18 7
12/24/2005 07:18 AM

I got a can of fish for christmas.

SquidBoy 19,912 12
12/24/2005 07:20 AM

Shut. The. Frost. Up.

Gardenghoul 18 7
12/24/2005 07:28 AM

Hey, i'm having fun here. If you don't think they're funny, that's fine, but at least i'm contributing. What are you doing?

thepokematrix 39 7
12/24/2005 01:59 PM

Santa: "When I moved to the motherland they took all my reindeer, but I found these sled dogs as a replacement. The only problem is none of them have a red nose to guide me in the dark... Oh well the butt of my rifle will solve that!!!" *SMACK*

Piquantrax - Keeping Kwanzaa Kool 8,691 9
12/25/2005 08:15 PM

Seasons Greetings from Yuri, Vlad, and all of us at the Kremlin.

CoachKnox 60 8
12/26/2005 05:52 PM

"God dammit! Cuba Gooding Jr. beats us every Frost-ing time!"

SausageBoy 15,703 0
12/27/2005 03:32 PM

wazzent me

Heyoka 1,000 9
12/28/2005 12:32 PM

"Oh my GOD, I had no idea dogs could FART like that!!"

morbidiqua 4 7
12/29/2005 08:46 PM

Threats of coal were no longer a strong enough motivator for the young.

morbidiqua 4 7
12/29/2005 08:48 PM

There would be no sleighjackings this year.

Snorkster. Or not. 45,655 12
12/30/2005 03:40 AM

After reading through this thread, Santa's decided that Frostwit NLI posters deserve something more...definite than a lump of coal for being bad.

Tansy's Mom 3 7
12/31/2005 01:29 AM

Santa,to lead dog:"No,boy,NO! Do Not retrieve the duck!!!

triscuitbiscuit 27 7
01/06/2006 01:25 AM

Sorry kids, my sleigh broke down in the middle of Camden, NJ...

whostolemyname 0 7
01/06/2006 04:52 PM

Santa you lazy ass. No wonder you're so fat you don't even guide your own sleigh anymore *points at guy guiding the sled dogs for santa*

echo423 0 7
01/08/2006 04:14 PM

Damn Communists, Sharring Everything

Hickory420 4 7
01/09/2006 02:32 PM

Santa: Lets go get my real sled back! You goofs in the back: PUSH! You black and white bitches in the front: MUSH! Or I'll shoot you all!! HAHAHAHA!!! I Love Being Drunk



Foot Soldiers: *derrrrr*



Dog: Hey doggy, I see your Kibbles'n'Bits! Cover up Buttercup befor I smack that fat sack.

3,239 8
01/11/2006 05:00 PM

Sure your Santa Clause...and SURE I'm on your naughty list...and SURE I'm gonna get a lump of coal if I don't take you to the nearest petting zoo!!!

Dogs Akimbo 211,584 32
01/17/2006 12:37 AM

I don't know where your reindeer are. Where did you leave them?

VictoriaE77 8 7
01/17/2006 08:35 AM

"Did anyone remember to leave the ransom note?"

Torch18 3,239 8
01/17/2006 01:01 PM

"When I ordered a Santa Sleigh, I didn't expect it to come with it's own Santa!"

Shawn Roy 302 8
01/18/2006 06:07 PM

Ruskies and huskies

No Lloydering 48,662 14
01/20/2006 04:40 PM

...but do you recall

the most famous husky of all?



Ivan the Siberian Husky

Had a very shiny collar

And if you ever saw it

It would even make you holler

All of the other huskies

Used to laugh and bark and stuff like that

They never let poor Ivan

Something something mmmm.. lalalalala

BobbyBooBooz4215327 225 7
01/21/2006 09:52 AM

I AM SANTORZ!!! I OWN JOO!!!!!!

Mr. Slinkys 9.75 Digits 28,185 10
01/21/2006 09:53 AM

I want you to die.

BobbyBooBooz4215327 225 7
01/21/2006 09:56 AM

Mr. Slinkys 9.75 Digits you must luv me youz r followin me!!!!

TheWorks 5 7
01/30/2006 11:48 AM

It's obvious to me. Russians got Santa drunk and took him back to his "grotto" using some slightly horny dogs.

TorchAteTeen 3,239 8
02/02/2006 11:20 AM

Huh?

Pubah 56,805 18
02/02/2006 02:23 PM

Julia Roberts is an elf?

La Petite Mort de TableTopJane 173,958 15
02/02/2006 04:15 PM

In soviet Russia, sleighs jack you!

Senor Poopypants 411 7
02/02/2006 04:41 PM

This is a screengrab from the new movie "Santa Claus, the Dogsledding Commie"