Gorky Thatcher- Outlaw Poet 41,132 13
01/02/2006 08:08 PM

FIRST!

Not Jilly 15,189 12
01/02/2006 08:09 PM

Isn't it part of the Ubby Dubby language?

Piemaster - Just another fact of life... 12,538 15
01/02/2006 08:10 PM

ZUG is for ZUG mother-Froster!

dropkick brody 43,090 12
01/02/2006 08:11 PM

Because you lost a bet?

Lady Diana Matronic 57,835 108
01/02/2006 08:11 PM

Damnit Pie, I was just gonna say the same thing.

The Mailman ate too much gingerbread 176,450 56
01/02/2006 08:13 PM

Why is it called ZUG?



When the site first started, we were not really sure about the concept of online comedy. So we named the site "ZUG", because we knew that, in case the web site failed, we could always resell the domain name at a good price to the Deutsche Bahn, the German train company.

Piemaster - Just another fact of life... 12,538 15
01/02/2006 08:13 PM

ZUG - Because lemonparty.org was already taken.

newwave 45,912 10
01/02/2006 08:14 PM

It is called ZUG, mostly, because all the good three letter domains were available, and we thought it'd be easier to remember than 0Q5.org.

Phla. Just Phla. 131,068 34
01/02/2006 08:16 PM

Zug, capital of the Swiss canton of that name, is a picturesque little town at the northeastern corner of the lake of Zug, and at the foot of the Zugerberg (3255 ft.), which rises gradually, its lower slopes thickly covered with fruit trees. Population: 6508 (1900), 23'000 (2004), mainly German-speaking and Romanists.



Also, eBay and Amazon were already taken.

dropkick brody 43,090 12
01/02/2006 08:16 PM

Because if, for some reason, someone made an alphabetical list of websites, ZUG would be pretty near the end.



And people usually remember the stuff at the beginning and end of lists.



So, it's to hypothetically increase traffic. There, that wasn't to tricky to figure out. You're welcome.

luv muchine 115 7
01/02/2006 08:17 PM

Let's just go with Brody's idea be done with it.

luv muchine 115 7
01/02/2006 08:19 PM

Well Brody's first idea, yeah the funny one.

Chit Eating Grin 178,781 15
01/02/2006 08:21 PM

The answer lies in my new book, "Prank the Monkey."

Phla. Just Phla. 131,068 34
01/02/2006 08:24 PM

OOooh, Chit just hit JonHergruve's soft spot: Shameless self-promotion.

thepokematrix 39 7
01/02/2006 08:27 PM

a zillion ugly gnomes... of course!

newwave 45,912 10
01/02/2006 08:39 PM

all the good three letter domains were available



Were? More like weren't, you ass-jockeying ball-gargling Coleridge-sniffing dick-eating fag!

Roofie Raccoon 56,688 10
01/02/2006 08:40 PM

You are SO weird.

Robin® 14,626 10
01/02/2006 08:41 PM

I was originally a site to promote this guy.

Phla. Just Phla. 131,068 34
01/02/2006 08:44 PM

His name is Robert Paulson Peter J. Zug.

newwave 45,912 10
01/02/2006 08:49 PM

That'd make for a weird logo...

Phla. Just Phla. 131,068 34
01/02/2006 08:53 PM

I'm not calling them Orbs anymore. I'm calling them Peters.

newwave 45,912 10
01/02/2006 08:55 PM

I'll give you a Peter.

newwave 45,912 10
01/02/2006 08:56 PM

You can't rename stuff at will like that. What if I decided to call some stupid skateboarding trick an "Ollie" just because kids are always doing it?

John Hargrave 128,751 73
01/02/2006 08:59 PM

"ZUG is for ZUG mother-Froster!" is funny, but not really practical.



"Because I lost a bet" is not bad, but c'mon, I know you guys can do better. Even though I can't.

newwave 45,912 10
01/02/2006 09:01 PM

OK, OK, how about because it's part of a Partnership for a Drug Free America campaign? ZUGS NOT DRUGS! Hahahahahahahaigotnothin'...

Roofie Raccoon 56,688 10
01/02/2006 09:04 PM

"ZUG is an Austrian term used to describe the action of blowing milk out one's nose when laughing. We thought it would appropriate for the world's only comedy site yet obscure enough to not offend."

dropkick brody 43,090 12
01/02/2006 09:04 PM

Just say 'For the same reason amazon is called amazon.'



Let those Frosters deal with it.

Phla. Just Phla. 131,068 34
01/02/2006 09:11 PM

Zug is named in memory of my Great Aunt Zugarina. At her funeral, after she was buried, we found out she wasn't really dead. We all had a good laugh about it. Years later, I would decide to name the World's Only Comedy Site after a german train.

T-Bone 211,584 32
01/02/2006 09:11 PM

Zug is a shortening of the Hebrew word zugot, which means "pairs" and implies duality. The concept of duality is found throughout life. You are probably familiar with the Chinese Yin Yang symbol.



In comedy, duality is also everywhere. There is a straight man who sets up the joke, and the comedian who delivers the punchline.



Think of Burns and Allen, Burns and Schreiber, Abbot and Costello, Sacco and Vanzetti, and Milk and Cereal.



On one hand, life is sad and bring tears. On the other hand, your neighbor slips in some dog poop and lands on his back. You laugh.



Zug is a concise symbol for the duality of life and comedy. Two blondes walk into a bar....

dropkick brody 43,090 12
01/02/2006 09:13 PM

...you'd think one of them woulda seen it.

Humphrey B Bulging 51,764 12
01/02/2006 09:19 PM

You were sick of the fact that the only entertainment on offer on the internet was pornography. So, you decided to create a comedy site to compete with all the porn sites.



www.ZippersUpGentlemen.com was too long so you shortened it.

T-Bone 211,584 32
01/02/2006 09:21 PM

You were sick of the fact that the only entertainment on offer on the internet was pornography.



That's the funniest thing I've heard today.

Thug Knight 241 7
01/02/2006 09:25 PM

Becuase ZUG is slang for space Thug

Anastacia Lotus 171,275 14
01/02/2006 09:27 PM

Because the name Chance Comedy Central was already taken?

newwave 45,912 10
01/02/2006 09:30 PM

You could just tell them this:



"You don't know where domain names come from? Well, when a webmaster and a graphic designer love each other very much, they get together and do what we call 'brainstorming' and then 9 months later the internet stork brings them a bundle of joy! Ours was named Zug, nice and cute because it was born from love. Other sites had horrible names bestowed on them like JimJChuckleFrost.edu because their designers were homosexuals."

Roofie Raccoon 56,688 10
01/02/2006 09:31 PM

Oh, like aMurder.com!

T-Bone 211,584 32
01/02/2006 09:31 PM

Because aMurder.com was taken?

Anastacia Lotus 171,275 14
01/02/2006 09:31 PM

I love Newwave!



Keep that on the DL please, there has been enough arguing today.

T-Bone 211,584 32
01/02/2006 09:32 PM

I'm takin' that as a sign...

Anastacia Lotus 171,275 14
01/02/2006 09:32 PM

I'll need my taxes done real soon. I hope its a lengthy process.

Balfazz 518 9
01/02/2006 09:33 PM

Cause it's a hug with a Z!!!

T-Bone 211,584 32
01/02/2006 09:34 PM

I've been using the short form for most of my life.

newwave 45,912 10
01/02/2006 09:34 PM

What? I'm no accountant.

Chit Eating Grin 178,781 15
01/02/2006 09:35 PM

Having nothing to do with the cool folks on GAB, it began as you and AL and anyone else you decide to enlist met in college. It wasn't long before you heard others refer to you as those "Zainy Uber Geeks" and you went from there.

The High Priestess Of Stewie 58,948 29
01/02/2006 09:36 PM

Zug: Because I couldn't think of anything better.



Zug: What the hell else are we going to call this place? Have you even read the Shakespeare on here? It's all poop and dead baby jokes.



Zug: We have tits here. And jokes.

Anastacia Lotus 171,275 14
01/02/2006 09:36 PM

But the stack of forms is thick right?

The High Priestess Of Stewie 58,948 29
01/02/2006 09:37 PM

Zug: Because "hotjailbaitass.com" was taken.

newwave 45,912 10
01/02/2006 09:37 PM

Or, you could always just tell them the REAL answer. Like you told us.

T-Bone 211,584 32
01/02/2006 09:40 PM

What the hell's going on here?

Dur I'm a fishstick 45,912 10
01/02/2006 09:44 PM

A sexy party!

Big Boobs McGee 6,369 10
01/02/2006 09:45 PM

YES! I so walked into this post at the right time!

Anastacia Lotus 171,275 14
01/02/2006 09:45 PM

Im just trying to get my taxes done.

dropkick brody 43,090 12
01/02/2006 09:49 PM

Whatever you do, don't make a coat out of them.



Or pick a fight with skinheads to avoid them.

Randy Dicksin 12,363 11
01/02/2006 09:58 PM

John are you worried about any copyright law's that may have to do with the word Zug?

Big Boobs McGee 6,369 10
01/02/2006 10:06 PM

*snore* Is everyone on Chat or something?

newwave 45,912 10
01/02/2006 10:10 PM

Chat? Is that some sort of new drug?

Lila - Gettin' Hitched This Spring 78,555 13
01/02/2006 10:12 PM

You know what might help us out, John? TELLING US WHY THE Frost YOU NAMED IT ZUG TO BEGIN WITH!!

Anastacia Lotus 171,275 14
01/02/2006 10:12 PM

No its usually where i go to have sex.

John Hargrave 128,751 73
01/02/2006 10:12 PM

Zany Uber Geeks is kind of funny.



Are there any other acronyms that we could backfill into ZUG?

Anastacia Lotus 171,275 14
01/02/2006 10:14 PM

John since youre here maybe you can clear something up for me. We play battleships in chat right?



If not, I am just joking...he he he ho ho ho.

Phla. Just Phla. 131,068 34
01/02/2006 10:14 PM

ZUG stands for NO GEEKY ACRONYMS.

Anastacia Lotus 171,275 14
01/02/2006 10:16 PM

Zesty Underaged Girls!



Wo0t! Think of all the hits!

newwave 45,912 10
01/02/2006 10:18 PM

ZUG Under God!

Anastacia Lotus 171,275 14
01/02/2006 10:19 PM

Zippy Under Gorkat.



Heh that makes him a bottom...I got nothing, sorry.

Chit Eating Grin 178,781 15
01/02/2006 10:26 PM

Zero Underage GABbers ?

Phla. Just Phla. 131,068 34
01/02/2006 10:26 PM

JH is trying to hide the fact that along with the webspace, he also received several boxes full of Zebrastriped Underwear Garments that he is NOT SHARING.

Scented Scrotum Talc 178,045 22
01/02/2006 10:27 PM

If you're going the acronym route, I suggest a recursive acronym.



ZUG stands for "Zug is Utterly Great"

Anastacia Lotus 171,275 14
01/02/2006 10:28 PM

I heard he got a case of tennis balls too! The bastard!

Anastacia Lotus 171,275 14
01/02/2006 10:30 PM

John if you dont answer my question I will destroy the universe. I will....try me. I've done it before.

Phla. Just Phla. 131,068 34
01/02/2006 10:36 PM

Tell them Jeff named it and he won't tell you why.

Mofo - '06 Edition! 10,950 10
01/02/2006 10:45 PM

Zug: Because "hotjailbaitass.com" was taken.



No it isn't. Way to freaking get my hopes up on a wild goose chase. Arsehole.



ZUG:

Zygotes Undercooked are Good

Zimbabwe Unitarian Government

Zhuangzui's Underarm Goo

Zoophiles Usufruct Goats



Why is GAB in all-caps? What does it stand for?

Phla. Just Phla. 131,068 34
01/02/2006 10:47 PM

Hold on there Mofo. One stupid question at a time.

Chit Eating Grin 178,781 15
01/02/2006 10:47 PM

You stole the name from the Norwegian PEP Boys, Zach, Ug, and Gern.

Mofo - '06 Edition! 10,950 10
01/02/2006 10:47 PM

And yes, I know usufruct isn't really a verb.

No_Key_Bandit 76,490 10
01/02/2006 10:52 PM

yakuZa Users Group*





*The last gygin that questioned my acronym was never seen again.

Chit Eating Grin 178,781 15
01/02/2006 10:56 PM

yakuZa Users Group







Think of the tattoos we could all get.

No_Key_Bandit 76,490 10
01/02/2006 10:58 PM

And the fingers we could lose!

Suicide Ranger 27,937 12
01/02/2006 10:58 PM

Zoo of Unified Gabbers.

Zolton with Arsenic Sauce 88,200 34
01/02/2006 11:00 PM

Think of the tattoos we could all get.



Looks like somebody's way ahead of you on that one, Chit.

Phla. Just Phla. 131,068 34
01/02/2006 11:01 PM

That guy less than 3's JAFF.

The Rockin' Donkey 77,546 17
01/02/2006 11:13 PM

Q. Why is it called ZUG?



A. We like to call our funny little website ZUG for a very practical reason: That's it's name.

Chit Eating Grin 178,781 15
01/02/2006 11:13 PM

Man Zolton, I got a hangover just looking at that.

newwave 45,912 10
01/02/2006 11:17 PM

Donk wins.

Kittuns is full of bananas! 44,835 9
01/02/2006 11:27 PM

Q. What is Zug?

A. A Zug is a hardening of the penis that occurs when tubes in the Zugile tissues fill up with blood. Usually, a Zug causes the penis to enlarge and stand away from the body. Zug can go away on their own or after ejaculation -- the release of semen through the urethra.



*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=



Q. Is It normal to get Zug during the day?

A. Yes. Zug is a perfectly normal function of the male body, especially in guys who are going through puberty. Many Zugs are caused by sexual arousal, such as watching a sexy movie or from sexual fantasizing. Zug may seem to happen for no reason at all. If you've gotten Zug during a weird or embarrassing situation -- like in the middle of a really boring meeting -- there's no reason to worry that something is wrong with you.



*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=



Q. Can Zug hurt me?

A. No, not really. You might get sore if you are Zugging a lot. If you feel sore from Zugging too much, than that is too much for you.

Some people engage in a thing called auto-erotic zugphyxiation. This can end in accidental death. Auto-erotic zugphyxiation is defined as the induction of cerebral anoxia -- a deficiency of oxygen in the brain through self-applied suffocation methods while Zugging. PLEASE do not try this!

Bankey 70,843 10
01/02/2006 11:41 PM

Because 'GUZ' sounds more like a creepy uncle than a comedy website.

Kittuns is full of bananas! 44,835 9
01/02/2006 11:45 PM

Because ZUG is the sound that FratBankey makes when they make sweet, sweet backdoor lovin'.

No_Key_Bandit 76,490 10
01/02/2006 11:51 PM

No Kittuns.

Whomever is catching spells "RUN" over and over again.

Bankey 70,843 10
01/02/2006 11:57 PM

So we're makin' it gay again in aught -six?



















Yeah, I'm down with that.

131,068 34
01/02/2006 11:59 PM

Hooooo! You're the best, Johnny.

131,068 34
01/03/2006 12:00 AM

Not you, homogay.

Kittuns is full of bananas! 44,835 9
01/03/2006 12:00 AM

Aught-six?



Is that German for "puttin' your manhood in a dark hallway?"

Bankey 70,843 10
01/03/2006 12:01 AM

Is that an invitation?

Bankey 70,843 10
01/03/2006 12:03 AM

YOU NO CLICKIN' BASTARDS! WHAT DO YOU KNOW FROM FUNNY!

Fratbery 44,835 9
01/03/2006 12:04 AM

Yes, yes it is.

No_Key_Bandit 76,490 10
01/03/2006 12:05 AM

Say it again Bankey.



Only this time...



*WITH PIZZAZ!*

Kittuns: The Moosinator™ 44,835 9
01/03/2006 12:06 AM

<action>says it with pizza</action>

Fruth humma bfeeebee khaaan!

T-Bone 211,584 32
01/03/2006 12:10 AM

YOU NO CLICKIN' BASTARDS!



Dude, you shoulda been here earlier.

No_Key_Bandit 76,490 10
01/03/2006 12:12 AM

I'm actually kinda surprised (and somewhat disappointed) that it took this long to fagjack this thread.

Phla. Just Phla. 131,068 34
01/03/2006 12:12 AM

Yeah, some chick that nobody recognized was all ready to show her boobs.

Bankey 70,843 10
01/03/2006 12:23 AM

Look I'm trying to watch UGA wet the bed harder than Auburn, cut me some slack here.

Chi Chi Felipe: What Scientologists Believe In 161,353 14
01/03/2006 12:26 AM

"The name 'ZUG' comes from a combination of the 26th, 21st, and 7th letters of the alphabet, respectively."

Bankey 70,843 10
01/03/2006 12:27 AM

Well, if you buy into the 'English' version, I guess.

Chi Chi Felipe: What Scientologists Believe In 161,353 14
01/03/2006 12:28 AM

"'Zug' is the Berklee College of Music's secret society. But don't tell anyone because, you know, it's a secret."

Chi Chi Felipe: What Scientologists Believe In 161,353 14
01/03/2006 12:28 AM

"The name 'Zug' is Aramaic for 'made-up word.'"

Chi Chi Felipe: What Scientologists Believe In 161,353 14
01/03/2006 12:29 AM

"The word 'Zug' has three letters, just like the words 'ass,' 'two,' and 'God.'"

Oliver Chest: Poop Factory 203,475 12
01/03/2006 01:24 AM

A lot of people ask me why I named this place Zug. The answer is quite simple really. I like penguins.

Oliver Chest: Poop Factory 203,475 12
01/03/2006 01:31 AM

Or you could just end it with:



Why is this site called Zug?



I get asked that question a lot.

Big Irish Guy 203,956 21
01/03/2006 02:57 AM

ZUG was a term used by John Hargrave's grandmother to describe any small joke or secret that they shared. A ZUG was something funny and special, and the term helped form a bond between them. When John became successful he wanted to use the term, but grandma didn't approve. So he killed her and donated the body to the American Necropheliacs Society.



HOW'S THAT FOR A ZUG GRANNY?

JajobaThe1st 308 8
01/03/2006 04:46 AM

Zippers Undone... aaaaand... Go!

Frogpop 173,153 25
01/03/2006 05:03 AM

Zambonis Under Glass

Rider: Stealing Chance From Crackalacka! 2,014 9
01/03/2006 05:11 AM

The dictionary says:



zugL

A low-level Awk(?) from Geac.





Or we could just access the Acronym Finder where they say ZUG means: Zaurus User Group

Rider: Stealing Chance From Crackalacka! 2,014 9
01/03/2006 05:14 AM

I seemed to have pulled an Ollie with my link.

http://www.zaurususergroup.org/

Rider: Stealing Chance From Crackalacka! 2,014 9
01/03/2006 05:20 AM

Q. What does Zug mean?



A. Well, when I was younger I really liked Thomas the Tank Engine and Friends. Zug, tug #4, was my favorite because he was so scheming and vindictive with his pal Zip. Man, their duo, Z-Stack was so great.

Rider: Stealing Chance From Crackalacka! 2,014 9
01/03/2006 05:25 AM

I love Newwave!



Keep that on the DL please, there has been enough arguing today.



Oh my gorky! I can't believe the lies that go on around this place!



My heart is broken.

Declan McManus-They say that bears have affairs 131,887 36
01/03/2006 06:04 AM

ZUG- because "The Onion" was taken.



ZUG- because "The Stump" is an invitation-only site.



ZUG- because we are closeted Swiss Citizens.



ZUG- Ziff-Davis Under Ground.





ZUG- To make idiots like you ask stupid questions, darling!

Whistler P. McManus 186,122 44
01/03/2006 06:11 AM

What is this ZUG you guys are talking about? Is it anything like GAB?

Chris Garrett 86,932 12
01/03/2006 06:32 AM

Dick Hallorann: I can remember when I was a little boy. My grandmother and I could hold conversations entirely without ever opening our mouths. She called it "shining." And for a long time, I thought it was just the two of us that had the shine to us. Just like you probably thought you was the only one. But there are other folks, though mostly they don't know it, or don't believe it. How long have you been able to do it?... Why don't you want to talk about it?

John Hargrave: I'm not supposed to.

Dick Hallorann: Who said you ain't supposed to?

John Hargrave: Zug.

Dick Hallorann: Who's Zug?

John Hargrave: Zug is a little boy that lives in my mouth.

Dick Hallorann: Is Zug the one that tells you things?

John Hargrave: Yes.

Dick Hallorann: How does he tell you things?

John Hargrave: It's like I go to sleep, and he shows me things. But when I wake up, I can't remember everything.

Dick Hallorann: Does your Mom and Dad know about Zug?

John Hargrave: Yes.

Dick Hallorann: Do they know he tells you things?

John Hargrave: No. Zug told me never to tell 'em.

Dick Hallorann: Has Zug ever told you anything about this place? About the Overlook Hotel?

John Hargrave: I don't know.

Dick Hallorann: Now think real hard now. Think.

John Hargrave: Maybe he showed me something.

Chris Garrett 86,932 12
01/03/2006 06:32 AM

Dick Hallorann: Try to think of what it was.

John Hargrave: Mr. Hallorann, are you scared of this place?

Dick Hallorann: No. Scared - there's nothin' here. It's just that, you know, some places are like people. Some "shine" and some don't. I guess you could say the Overlook Hotel here has somethin' almost like "shining."

John Hargrave: Is there something bad here?

Dick Hallorann: Well, you know, Doc, when something happens, you can leave a trace of itself behind. Say like, if someone burns toast. Well, maybe things that happen leave other kinds of traces behind. Not things that anyone can notice, but things that people who "shine" can see. Just like they can see things that haven't happened yet. Well, sometimes they can see things that happened a long time ago. I think a lot of things happened right here in this particular hotel over the years. And not all of 'em was good.

John Hargrave: What about Room 237?

Dick Hallorann: Room 237?

John Hargrave: You're scared of Room 237, ain't ya?

Dick Hallorann: No I ain't.

John Hargrave: Mr. Hallorann. What is in Room 237?

Dick Hallorann: Nothin'. There ain't nothin' in Room 237. But you ain't got no business goin' in there anyway. So stay out. You understand? Stay out.

Piemaster - Just another fact of life... 12,538 15
01/03/2006 08:05 AM

Chris, your Beegees record is skipping...

Professor Nutbutter 181,311 35
01/03/2006 09:34 AM

"Zug was the name of a sympathetic Vietcong prison guard who wrote me to tell me of my father's last days in a POW camp. This site is a tribute to my father, Marine Corporal Francis X. Hargrave. That's all I'm comfortable saying."

Shubha Sibongile Chickens 286,539 61
01/03/2006 09:38 AM

Zug- Because Milton Bradley was the first sponsor of the Zug website, and the need for a three letter word using that difficult Z tile in the Scrabble game was seen as a marketing masterstroke.

Phla. Just Phla. 131,068 34
01/03/2006 09:44 AM

I will now explain the meaning of ZUG through interpretive dance:

Chris Garrett 86,932 12
01/03/2006 09:44 AM

I SMELL SQUASH!

Phla. Just Phla. 131,068 34
01/03/2006 09:46 AM

MUFFTAUR NOT LIKE ACRONYMS!

Rider: Broken Hearted 2,014 9
01/03/2006 10:02 AM

Next time keep holding your breath and don't exhale.

Rider: Broken Hearted 2,014 9
01/03/2006 10:10 AM

Don't forget that you can't spell.

Chris Garrett 86,932 12
01/03/2006 10:14 AM

All I have to say is,



Heh.

Phla. Just Phla. 131,068 34
01/03/2006 10:14 AM

I'm watching this with a kind of horrific expression on my face that might been used to watch baby seals get clubbed. It's bad, and I should put a stop to it, but at the same time, I want to throw another baby seal in to watch it again.

Chris Garrett 86,932 12
01/03/2006 10:15 AM

"Only Time Will Tell" is a hit song by Asia....



In the "40 Year-Old Virgin," he had an Asia poster on his wall.



Just sayin' Demo.

Prof. Fantabulous 19,711 13
01/03/2006 10:18 AM

If i had a baby seal, i would try to prevent him from getting those freaky marks on his cheaks.

Rider: Broken Hearted 2,014 9
01/03/2006 10:18 AM

Correcting a spelling mistake!



I didn't correct your spelling mistake.

Chit Eating Grin 178,781 15
01/03/2006 10:21 AM

Let it go, he's hiding a monkey icon.

Chris Garrett 86,932 12
01/03/2006 10:27 AM

I am hearing Demo's posts in a "Robin-Hood" type voice.

Shubha Sibongile Chickens 286,539 61
01/03/2006 10:35 AM

"John Hargrave originally wanted the site to be Bug.com. His original coder took this as a personal slam and changed it to Zug.com in revenge. This would come back into play later in the game..."

Rider: Broken Hearted 2,014 9
01/03/2006 10:36 AM

Okay. So, we should tally up the score between Oboe and me:



Oboe: 80 points.

Rider: -1,500,000 points.

Chit Eating Grin 178,781 15
01/03/2006 10:37 AM

Really ?



I was hearing Jack Palance in Shane saying, "Pick up the gun."

Ditdah 123,110 14
01/03/2006 11:07 AM

"Only Time Will Tell" is a hit song by Asia....



In the "40 Year-Old Virgin," he had an Asia poster on his wall.



Just sayin' Demo.



Chris told me once Asia was his favorite band.



And no, I'm not making that up.

Chris Garrett 86,932 12
01/03/2006 11:18 AM

Second favorite.





Get it right, rugmuncher.

Ditdah 123,110 14
01/03/2006 11:21 AM

Oh, sorry.



I forgot about New Kids on the Block.

John Hargrave 128,751 73
01/03/2006 11:31 AM

My favorites are:



"The name 'Zug' is Aramaic for 'made-up word.'"



"Because THAT'S ITS NAME!"



"An acronym for 'ZUG is Utterly Great.'"



Henceforth, I shall use these answers interchangeably.

Oliver Chest: Oliver Chest 203,475 12
01/03/2006 11:39 AM

But the penguins need your help, John.

Mr. Sir. 66,727 9
01/03/2006 11:49 AM

There is a considerable distance between John Hargrave's critical accounts of the relationship between Nazism and the founding of Zug, and the exalted, fanciful accounts by his evil twin Jeff. Thus, the latter has totally lapped up the twin myths of the "Goatse", of which Hitler's older friend Dietrich Eckart had attended some meetings, as (1) a profound vehicle of ancient secret knowledge, and as (2) an influential body with a deep impact upon Nazi thought and politics. John, by contrast, affirms that "the fairy-tales about Zug are very largely later inventions which only gained a certain trendiness after the end of World War 2." Al Natanagara explains how these myths were invented and propagated during the Nazi era by Tralmafadorean founder Baron Rudolf von Sebottendorf, real name Bob Johnson, who tried to claim a role as the Fhrer's original mentor in the then successful Nazi movement.

Mr. Sir. 66,727 9
01/03/2006 11:50 AM

Both men were shameless liars. Sebottendorf, a Freemason, and Turkish national by choice and wounded veteran on the Turkish side of the second Balkan war, was one of those typical occultist conmen with false academic and nobility titles, though his initiation into Turkish Sufism may have been genuine. He was exposed and denounced as a self-serving myth-monger by other Zug and Nazi insiders immediately upon the publication of his book Bevor Hitler kam ("Before Hitler Came", 1934), which remained in use as a popular source about Hitler's alleged temperamental and religious eccentricities until the 1980s, both among neo-Nazis like Professor Nutbutter and anti-Nazis like Dogs Akimbo, as well as among the whole crowd of sensationalist confabulators like Chriss Garrett, or Jilly Willy, or Chance. Around the time of Chicken's death, Rauschning's account was definitively exposed as spurious, e.g. he was shown not to have been present at most of the private conversations on which he claimed to "report". Contemporary histories of the Nazi period have expunged it from their bibliographies, and Al Natanagara (who tried to feed the foreign press a sensational "insider" account of John as an occultist weirdo.) correctly dismisses it as "totally unfounded".

Mr. Sir. 66,727 9
01/03/2006 11:50 AM

Zug's reliance on glowing urine-filled orbs illustrates how, contrary to the belief common among it's neo-Nazi admirers, it really has no direct contact with any important Nazi insiders who could have informed it on the inspiration, occult or otherwise, behind Nazism apart from making tall claims about Nazism being part of an esoteric tradition and the germ of a new solar religion (with Hitler as its prophet). Zug doesn't really try to establish credibility by means of claiming direct initiation into the remainders of Nazi esotericism nor even by means of some clever name-dropping. In asserting it's beliefs about Nazism, Zug openly presumes and supposes- citing the communis opinio (invokes anonymous third-hand sources). Zug missed the whole Nazi period in Germany and contacts after the war had been limited to third-rank Nazi followers, not including a single witness to any secret or inner workings of the Nazi apparatus (or even worse for the veracity of Zug's account, the occasional high-ranking Nazis met were equally unaware of any esoteric lineage underlying their political movement). Myth-mongers may explain this as the result of the secrecy to which esotericists are sworn, but it's simply obvious that nothing is reported because there was nothing to report in the first place.

Mr. Sir. 66,727 9
01/03/2006 11:51 AM

John,



If you can't dazzle them with your brilliance, then baffle them with bullShakespeare.



Best wishes,

Mr. Sir.

Mr. Sir. 66,727 9
01/03/2006 12:06 PM

I Googled like a mo-fo for that nonsense, Oboe.

dropkick brody 43,090 12
01/03/2006 12:13 PM

Googled like a mo-fo



For some reason this made me laugh so much I had a slight coughing fit.



Congradulations!

Big Irish Guy 203,956 21
01/03/2006 12:14 PM

John Hargrave

1/03/2006 11:31 am



My favorites are:



"The name 'Zug' is Aramaic for 'made-up word.'"



"Because THAT'S ITS NAME!"



"An acronym for 'ZUG is Utterly Great.'"



Henceforth, I shall use these answers interchangeably.





Frost you Hargrave.

Trixxie the Red Nosed Homo 65,026 15
01/03/2006 12:31 PM

"His name is Robert Paulson Peter J. Zug."



OMG it's like having a magic looking glass that see ten years into the future when Squeamish runs for congress.





Also you wanted FUG but it was a little to unfamily oriented.

Trixxie the Red Nosed Homo 65,026 15
01/03/2006 12:40 PM

Zealots utilize garroting.



So y'all think it really is Hargrave or just another hack?

Frogpop 173,153 25
01/03/2006 03:46 PM

Are you implying that Hargrave isn't a hack?

thepokematrix 39 7
01/03/2006 05:06 PM

ZUG: Zesty Underaged Girls. After I bought the domain I realized I was better at comedy than directing kiddy porn...


Is that how you spell "kiddy porn"?

thepokematrix 39 7
01/03/2006 05:12 PM

"ZUG is Utterly Great"

Kinda like php? No that question was not nerdy...

No_Key_Bandit 76,490 10
01/03/2006 06:27 PM

"My favorites are:



"The name 'Zug' is Aramaic for 'made-up word.'"

"Because THAT'S ITS NAME!"

"An acronym for 'ZUG is Utterly Great.'"

Henceforth, I shall use these answers interchangeably."



Yet another list I failed to make.

<action>sighs</action>

JajobaThe1st 308 8
01/06/2006 09:03 AM

Ah... oboe... I don't know you but you made me laugh with that Jew joke... hoo wee.

Mrs. JM 24,693 8
01/06/2006 09:10 AM

I have nothing to add. I am all starstruck because John's here.

Mrs. JM 24,693 8
01/06/2006 09:10 AM

The same thing happened when I met Lisa Whelchel.

MaddMatt - Steely Eyed Warrior/Poet 15,437 9
01/08/2006 05:25 PM

Asking why it's called ZUG is like asking why a tree is called a tree. It simply is. We would have done a grave diservice had we called it something else. Then people would be constantly bothering us with inane questions like, "Why didn't you call it ZUG?"



Or you could go with the classic;



"I could tell you, but then I would have to kill you."



Or my personal favorite;



"The answer you seek is on the secret page."

MaddMatt - Steely Eyed Warrior/Poet 15,437 9
01/08/2006 05:32 PM

Why is it that every time I put a post together, I always end up with parts left over? In this case I have a "s" that should have gone in the last post somewhere.



I'll just leave it here in case someone needs it later.

SausageBoy 15,703 0
01/08/2006 05:32 PM

Madd Matt has a third nipple, no secret pages, and ZUG tatted on his ass.

Thug Knight - TK The President 241 7
01/08/2006 07:07 PM

ZUG is the name given in accordance with the prophecy.