turtle10 42,578 26
06/02/2006 10:46 AM

bugger off n00b













welcome

Pumpkin Noggin 56,642 8
06/02/2006 10:46 AM

and some decent Cheese as well.

Crypto 800 7
06/02/2006 10:54 AM

well im just sayin hi, im not trying to be funny. i know im a noob fool. hey wouldnt kill ya to say "hi welcome to the site"



but oh well. n.m

Taco: the Lord of the Crunch 61,976 36
06/02/2006 10:59 AM

N00b, some advice:

-Read the GAB FAQ. It'll help you out with a lot of the forum rules of posting, starting threads, etc. You'll be recieved better here if you do.

-Use proper spelling and grammar, including not using abbreviations for things like "nevermind." Not capitalizing, using AIMspeak, and the such only make you look retarded and piss us off.

turtle10 42,578 26
06/02/2006 11:00 AM

Did your stereotypical bad english teeth get in your way and you missed the "welcome"?



You apparently have not lurked enough if you expected a sincere welcome.

Jade - Queen of Mistakes 14,453 11
06/02/2006 11:02 AM

Okay. First of all, learn to use the shift key. It's right there on your keyboard. Round here, people are spelling, punctuation, capitalization and grammar Nazis. Read the FAQ, follow the ten commandments, and then read the FUQ.



Secondly, you're a n00b. You're pretty much gonna get hazed. Bring the funny.



Thirdly, it's nice to see another Brit here.



Welcome to Gab.

Mrs. JM 24,693 8
06/02/2006 11:02 AM

...and don't say "thingy."

Jade - Queen of Mistakes 14,453 11
06/02/2006 11:03 AM

Damn you, Taco.

Cry Havoc and Unleash the Corn Chips of War! 57,521 23
06/02/2006 11:03 AM

(ps. im 100% english, so therefore i have the greatest sense of humor to ever grace the earth)



In fact, you're so english you can't even spell humour correctly!

CCCCCCCCC 286,539 61
06/02/2006 11:06 AM

Frost-ing wanker.



Welcome.

Jade - Queen of Mistakes 14,453 11
06/02/2006 11:06 AM

I should have slipped a Tubgirl link in there somewhere.

Crypto 800 7
06/02/2006 11:07 AM

Thank you fine gentlemen for correcting my grammatical naivety and gross misuse of the fine language; that is English. I shalt not offendeth thine self's with my abbreviated words and unpleasant teeth. From hence forth I shalt only use the Queens English, and widen my vocabulary to better suite your upper class needs and wanting for a more proper dialect.



Good Day

Taco: the Lord of the Crunch 61,976 36
06/02/2006 11:09 AM

Misuse of a semicolon. Tsk tsk.

Cry Havoc and Unleash the Corn Chips of War! 57,521 23
06/02/2006 11:09 AM

The Queen wouldn't have put a semi-colon between 'language' and 'that'.

Pumpkin Noggin 56,642 8
06/02/2006 11:09 AM

AH...an Eaton lad, no doubt

Jade - Queen of Mistakes 14,453 11
06/02/2006 11:09 AM

Dude. I'm studying English at university. When people like you post, and mangle the language, you make me cry.

Crypto 800 7
06/02/2006 11:11 AM

well you know what. i failed english so i really couldnt care less. I do find it pretty ironic that most americans know better english than I do.

Linguo 57,521 23
06/02/2006 11:13 AM

Misuse of a semicolon.



Sentence fragment.

Midgets, licking windows since 1977 96,092 48
06/02/2006 11:17 AM

Misuse of a semicolin.





Is this about buttsex?

Midgets, licking windows since 1977 96,092 48
06/02/2006 11:18 AM

<action>groans</action>



Sorry, it just had to be done.

Jesus Christ! It's cs! 15,189 12
06/02/2006 12:08 PM

Hi. Welcome to the site.







Poo.

Mrs. JM 24,693 8
06/02/2006 12:27 PM

Midgets, licking windows since 1977



1977 is your year of birth? If so, mine too!

Beater 10,702 8
06/02/2006 12:33 PM

self's



Should be "selves" moron. You would have been better off saying you were a Kosovo refugee, and that "My english is nor too not bad."

Crypto 800 7
06/02/2006 01:02 PM

good job people. you all get a gold star for spotting spelling mistakes. Now that we have clarified you know english, lets move on shall we. thank you for the warm welcome, and i look forward to talking with all of you.

Jade - Queen of Mistakes 14,453 11
06/02/2006 01:05 PM

Well, I don't think we look forward to talking to you.



So STFU, n00b, and go eat a bowl of dick.



</Hammerhead>

Nachos - Cynic 57,521 23
06/02/2006 01:07 PM

Enjoy the lull while you can...tomorrow's Spanish day on GAB.



Whatever you do, don't forget that there's a questioning character at the beginning and end of a question. You'll never hear the end of it otherwise.

Crypto 800 7
06/02/2006 01:13 PM

well that was nice. im glad to see how warm and inviting you all are. I am wondering about the comical abilities of you insulters though. I mean i say hi and the whittiest thing you can come up with is "bugger off noob" and "we dont look forward to talking to you, STFU" or watever. I will give credit to the teeth remark, but most of you im pretty disapointed. i am an abassador to an entire nation, England! it's not like you dont have much material to work with. Surely you can do better than that. give me your best shot!





(thanks to those who did say hi)

Taco: the Lord of the Crunch 61,976 36
06/02/2006 01:14 PM

It's not like you're the only British islander we have here. We even have Welsh people. WELSH.

Jade - Queen of Mistakes 14,453 11
06/02/2006 01:16 PM

<action><------ British.

Mrs. JM 24,693 8
06/02/2006 01:17 PM

You're not getting off to a very good start...

Don't whine, TRUST ME. You will pay for a rong rong time.

Mrs. JM 24,693 8
06/02/2006 01:20 PM

Jade chat

Crypto 800 7
06/02/2006 01:24 PM

im not whining, im excited, its a challenge. if u make me cry i will give you a dollar (paypal only)



and i know, im off to a terrible start, but i really don't care, whats the worst you can do....laugh at me?

Closet Friend #1004 7,665 11
06/02/2006 01:27 PM

Crypto, your moniker and your command of the language is more suited to that of a queen; therefore, add Charlotte Anne to the also known as field in your profile...

Crypto 800 7
06/02/2006 01:40 PM

well i guess thats a start, but i know you can do better. Maybe you need more to work with. I shall tell you a little about myself



Im 20, i drive a Mitsubishi Lancer, I have a girlfriend, who ive been dating 2 years. I work for a newspaper as a graphic designer, I play soccer, i listen to indie, emo, punk, most rock, & also rave & techno.....

I live in Florida now, I lived in Montana for a year though.

I graduated college when i was 19, with an associates degree in graphic design..





right i've gave you plenty to work with, if you still can't hack it, i will tell you more, but someone has to come up with something...im at work and bored, and this is my only source of entertainment, so please.......amuse me.

Jade - Queen of Mistakes 14,453 11
06/02/2006 01:43 PM

Emo? Oh dear sweet Jesus, no.



*gets out a razor blade*



Remember, it's down the road, not across the street.

Pumpkin Noggin 56,642 8
06/02/2006 01:45 PM

Jade - Queen of Mistakes



6/02/2006 1:43 pm



Emo? Oh dear sweet Jesus, no.



*gets out a razor blade*



Remember, it's down the road, not across the street.





And you'll want to be sure to join us next Tuesday.

brewtaltiy 9 6
06/02/2006 01:46 PM

Plays soccer listens to rave and techno? sounds like another piece of Euro trash to me.

Jade - Queen of Mistakes 14,453 11
06/02/2006 01:47 PM

There was a story in a newspaper the other day, about a pregnant woman whose due date is 6-6-06. She's begging doctors to induce her so that she doesn't give birth to the anti-Christ.

Crypto 800 7
06/02/2006 01:48 PM

thankfully i dont have one of those rediculous excuses for haircuts. Ive got a number 2, kinda looks like Forest Gumps hair.



(blatent opportunity)

Pumpkin Noggin 56,642 8
06/02/2006 01:51 PM

Jade - Queen of Mistakes

6/02/2006 1:47 pm

There was a story in a newspaper the other day, about a pregnant woman whose due date is 6-6-06. She's begging doctors to induce her so that she doesn't give birth to the anti-Christ.



Probablly ought to change the plan to call him Damien then.

Pumpkin Noggin 56,642 8
06/02/2006 01:52 PM

Crypto



6/02/2006 1:48 pm



thankfully i dont have one of those rediculous excuses for haircuts. Ive got a number 2, kinda looks like Forest Gumps hair.



Apostophy.

And great...A bloody TED no less

brewtaltiy 9 6
06/02/2006 02:04 PM

Ridiculous not rediculous. Did you fail spelling too, limey?

Dogs Akimbo 211,584 32
06/02/2006 02:07 PM

1977 is your year of birth? If so, mine too!



Jilly, 1977 is the year of your birth whether or not crypto was born that year.



They stop changing after you reach twenty.

Crypto 800 7
06/02/2006 02:15 PM

Limey!

my you must have really had to rattle your brains to get that one out.



and i really have no idea what that little rant about 1977 is, but im sure its very funny so i will laugh.......ha....ha

Taco: the Lord of the Crunch 61,976 36
06/02/2006 02:32 PM

USE THE Frost-ing SHIFT KEY YOU GOOD FOR NOTHING TWATWAFFLE.



</angry Taco>

turtle10 42,578 26
06/02/2006 02:35 PM

</angry Taco>





Sooooo aroungry

Crypto 800 7
06/02/2006 02:57 PM

what about the shift key?

brewtaltiy 9 6
06/02/2006 03:18 PM

How about USING it once in a while?

Crypto 800 7
06/02/2006 03:19 PM

Yeh, i have it now. I just get in trouble in another thread. But do not fret, hence forth I shall have perfect punctuation and grammer.

brewtaltiy 9 6
06/02/2006 03:21 PM

You just get in trouble? What happened to the grammer thing?

Crypto 800 7
06/02/2006 03:37 PM

Areet. I give in. There's really no point in me trying to correct my problem. I've been trying for years. I've seen professionals, I even spent 3 months in rehab. Nothing has seemed to work. I guess it's just something I will have to live with.

Pumpkin Noggin 56,642 8
06/02/2006 03:39 PM

<action> Red Cards Crypto </action>



And England is out of the running, no World Cup final for them.

Beater 10,702 8
06/02/2006 03:40 PM

Areet.



What the Frost does that word mean. I hope it means you're going to leave, and never return. Never.Return.

Crypto 800 7
06/02/2006 03:48 PM

Yes England will most likely not last long in the world cup. We will probably get knocked out in the....well....the knockout stage.





"Areet" a slang term from Northeast England meaning "Alright"

Midgets, licking windows since 1977 96,092 48
06/02/2006 03:57 PM

You guys took what could have been a perfectly good thread about buttsex, England, and poor grammer and turned it into something that's not insulting to Jilly and her mesh panties.













I think we all could try a little harder.

Midgets, licking windows since 1977 96,092 48
06/02/2006 03:58 PM

<action>cowers to Jilly</action>



Sorry, sorry, sorry....

Pumpkin Noggin 56,642 8
06/02/2006 04:00 PM

<action> Yellow Cards Ollie until Jilly has her say

Crypto 800 7
06/02/2006 04:02 PM

Who is Jilly? I've heard her mentioned quite a bit



(Im assuming with the name Jilly and the mention of panties that Jilly is infact a her, but you never know nowadays, i could be wrong)

Beater 10,702 8
06/02/2006 04:11 PM

Ummm, that's not Ollie. I nkow this because Midgets has clickee'd people. Ollie Hardly ever Clickees.

turtle10 42,578 26
06/02/2006 04:20 PM

Who is Jilly? I've heard her mentioned quite a bit





If you don't know, you CLEARLY lied about how long you lurked. LIAR!

Midgets, licking windows since 1977 96,092 48
06/02/2006 04:24 PM

Apparently purple penises are the new Asians, we all look alike.

Pumpkin Noggin 56,642 8
06/02/2006 04:36 PM

<action> pulls yellow card from Ollie and Red Cards Midgets for penis impersonation or the bad joke

Pumpkin Noggin 56,642 8
06/02/2006 04:38 PM

Did I mention was an offical for the Italian Premier league?

(read as: I'm blind and take bribes)

$P,hla.07 131,068 34
06/02/2006 04:41 PM

If you are serious, you are my new hero.

Midgets, licking windows since 1977 96,092 48
06/02/2006 04:43 PM

<action>Slips Pumpkin a hand drawn $20</action>



What!?



He said he's blind.

Dogs Akimbo 211,584 32
06/02/2006 04:53 PM

brewtaltiy: Ridiculous not rediculous. Did you fail spelling too, limey?





Wait a minute, aren't you the guy who misspelled his own name?



Or am I thinking of JobBohnson?

larkknot 3,359 10
06/02/2006 05:23 PM

Okay n00b. I'm slightly less mean than most here, PMS notwithstanding. We are all literate adults. While some of us are younger than you, your ability to use the English language, be it American, Australian, Kiwi, or British, is indicitive of a much lower mental age.



Basically, the only acceptable acronyms here are STFU (only when followed by n00b or the next acronym), SMYT/SUYT (requests for showing of funbags), and the very rare WTF (only acceptable when used by a regular we know is actually able to type out the phrase).



Mispellings are only tolerated in a mockery of proper spelling (e.g., "teh," "evar").



Capitalize the first word of every sentence, or you look stupid.



I think that's enough GAB-grammar for one post.

hisboyelroy 10,621 13
06/02/2006 05:32 PM

U R DUM

Crypto 800 7
06/02/2006 05:34 PM

Well i appreciate the suggestions. No i didn't "lurk" in the forums. I never really paid any attention to them until now. I spent my time reading all the articles. Hopefully that clarifies the inconsistancies in my "story". Well saying as its my first day, i don't think i did to bad. I appreciate all the bad jokes and moral support.

hisboyelroy 10,621 13
06/02/2006 05:36 PM

do whatever the hell you want, just don't be a jackass.

brewtaltiy 9 6
06/02/2006 05:42 PM

Even Better, be a jackass. Give the rest of us something to do.

Dogs Akimbo 211,584 32
06/02/2006 09:53 PM

And if you soil yourself, you clean it up yourself.