A 12 hour tour...
A comedy conversation
by Mrs. JM  24,693  8
06/05/2006 09:11 AM 394 views
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So Mike and I had to bring his daughter home yesterday to her psychotic mother. 12 HOURS, PEOPLE.(well,it was supposed to be 12)
The little one starts the morning off with 3 chocolate doughnuts and chocolate milk, resulting in diahhrea.
On our 3,000th stop, she and I are in a gas station bathroom and I hear the words you never want to hear from a 4 year old...
"UH-OH."
So I'm all "What sweetie?"
"Nuffing"
"Let me in"
"No"
"Okay then, we're going to leave you here"
(door unlocks and swings open)
She is naked and her underwear "mysteriously" ended up in the toilet which is full if diahhrea water.
So I am freaking out - I can't leave her alone in the gas station bathroom so Lester the Molester can kidnap her. So I crack the door and start hollering for Mike.
From across the parking lot he yells "WHAT?"
I'm like "Come here"
"No! What do you want?"
"Panties, Mike, we need fresh panties."
I hear giggling coming from all directions.
We are such hillbillies.
That is all.
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Like This? Rate It!
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Funny
9 votes
3.8
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Funny
11 votes
3.5
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Chit 178,781  15
06/05/2006 09:16 AM
So, did Mike know which one of you needed the panties ?
He didn't rush in there with the mesh ones did he ?
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Amusing
2 votes
1.5
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Mrs. JM 24,693 8
06/05/2006 09:18 AM
No Chitty - I don't poop my panties.
...well except that one time, but Mike doesn't and will never know about. (never trust a fart)
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Amusing
1 votes
1.0
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Mrs. JM 24,693 8
06/05/2006 09:21 AM
...well except that one time, but Mike doesn't and will never know about.
I don't even know how to fix that grammatical distaster.
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Chuckleworthy
2 votes
2.5
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Mrs. JM 24,693 8
06/05/2006 09:21 AM
heh disaster.
SHADDUP. It's Monday.
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Chuckleworthy
2 votes
2.0
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Chit 178,781 15
06/05/2006 09:22 AM
Still pretty damn funny though.
Since it's not your kid and all...
Next time make the kid some Cherrios for breakfast or somethin, jeeze....
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0 votes
0.0
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Mrs. JM 24,693 8
06/05/2006 09:24 AM
Or nothing at all.
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Hilarious
6 votes
4.0
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(un)Lucky Luke 695 9
06/05/2006 09:29 AM
Ok, here's mine...
No, my story not my panties.
Ok so my wife is a bit squeamish of barf, and I usually have to go and clean up if one of the kids Goes Blaagh else I have to clean up an even bigger "Grown-up Blaagh" which is much nastier... This one day I am watching TV and my 3 year old had eaten like -- a whole box of Kellogg's and so the inevitable... upchuck squared. "Luckily", she was sitting on my lap so I caught it with cupped hands....now the dilemma, I've got the kid encircled in my arms, I'm sitting in a deep chair and I can't get up without using my hands. At the end of the day I ended up dumping the qwack in a towel that my wife threw from the other side of the house and dumping the kid in a bath of anti-bacterial....
My dilemma, should I finish my bowl of chilly (that was standing on the couch next to me) in good faith, or eat a piece of dry bread.
I ended up having the chilly and it was really good, but afterwards found out that there should not have been carrots in it.....
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Chuckleworthy
1 votes
2.0
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Deep Fried Jeebus 220 8
06/05/2006 09:39 AM
chocolate gives you diahhrea?
Oooh... I'm Frosted now.
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Chuckleworthy
1 votes
2.0
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Le Straw 98,000 37
06/05/2006 09:45 AM
Luke, I clicked you for the cupped hand, because the same thing happened to me the other day. Otherwise, blah blah Grammar Police blah.
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0 votes
0.0
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(un)Lucky Luke 695 9
06/05/2006 09:53 AM
Straw - I am actually not engrish so thanks, and givusa break...
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Side-splitting
1 votes
5.0
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Zaphod Beeblebrox 31,599 13
06/05/2006 09:56 AM
You got what you deserved, feeding the kid doughnuts for breakfast.
Stupid rednecks.
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Funny
2 votes
3.0
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CCCCCCCCC 286,539 61
06/05/2006 10:03 AM
Wait, you're dating someone that has a kid, and in the long run, might pass on your motherly abilities to her?
Is it 6/6/06 yet?
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0 votes
0.0
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Pumpkin Noggin 56,642 8
06/05/2006 10:07 AM
Luke, clikies to you, I've been in a similar situation...unfortunatly for me, it was twins (2year olds) with the flu. I had it too at the time, so one technicolour yawn begat another and another. Messy day.
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0 votes
0.0
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Mrs. JM 24,693 8
06/05/2006 10:21 AM
Wait, you're dating someone that has a kid, and in the long run, might pass on your motherly abilities to her?
Is it 6/6/06 yet?
Ha.ha.ha.
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Hilarious
5 votes
4.6
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Nachos - Cynic 57,521 23
06/05/2006 11:07 AM
He didn't rush in there with the mesh ones did he ?
Doubtful, they were in the middle of an underwear emergency, not trying to rig the kid up a hammock.
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0 votes
0.0
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Mrs. JM 24,693 8
06/05/2006 01:51 PM
Hahaha. Nachos, you silly. I wouldn't put that childs nasty diahhrea bootie on my pretty panties.
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Funny
3 votes
3.0
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hisboyelroy 10,621 13
06/05/2006 02:20 PM
do you wear mexican hooker underwear?
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Chuckleworthy
2 votes
2.5
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Mrs. JM 24,693 8
06/05/2006 02:21 PM
Do YOU?
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Hilarious
4 votes
4.3
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hisboyelroy 10,621 13
06/05/2006 02:28 PM
i'm taking that as a yes.
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Chuckleworthy
2 votes
2.5
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Pumpkin Noggin 56,642 8
06/05/2006 02:29 PM
Mexican hookers wear underwear?
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