Chance- This IS a Toy! 171,275 14
06/12/2006 12:54 PM

We dont want to kill ourselves, we just want you to kill yourself. Big difference.

GollyJee 520 7
06/12/2006 12:55 PM

...or maybe thoughts of suicide just materials when I enter a thread...do I really have that affect on ppl?

GollyJee 520 7
06/12/2006 12:56 PM

We dont want to kill ourselves, we just want you to kill yourself. Big difference.



Wow Chance, that was incredibly cold-blooded...why do I sudden;y feel horny?

Chance- This IS a Toy! 171,275 14
06/12/2006 12:57 PM

why do I sudden;y feel horny?



Probably because I posted in your thread. I have that affect on men.

the bean machine 303 7
06/12/2006 12:57 PM

WHAT?!?? Sorry can you repeat that I was bust loading my gun.

the bean machine 303 7
06/12/2006 12:57 PM

busy

the bean machine 303 7
06/12/2006 12:58 PM

Sorry....busy

the bean machine 303 7
06/12/2006 12:59 PM

Damn it.....I quit!

GollyJee 520 7
06/12/2006 01:01 PM

OMYGOD LOL you suck soooo bad!!!

*wiping away tears*

ahhh thanks for that...needed it.

Ditdah 123,110 14
06/12/2006 01:09 PM

I hate both of you.

the bean machine 303 7
06/12/2006 01:11 PM

Me too!

GollyJee 520 7
06/12/2006 01:12 PM

*hugs Ditdah...and dry humps him/her leaving a wet spot*

Ditdah 123,110 14
06/12/2006 01:13 PM

You know, we have a photo album here. It's usually a good way to figure out if we are male or female.



Or in your case, a Frost-ing moron.

Nurturing Vegetarian Eco-Feminist Chickens 286,539 61
06/12/2006 01:16 PM

Quite the familiar little Frost-ing n00b, aren't you? And quit humping on our Ditdah. She's OUR bad lesbian.

GollyJee 520 7
06/12/2006 01:17 PM

*takes Ditdah photo from her profile, photoshops her eating dick while taking dick in the @ss then sends photo out to 500 people including her parents. Then creates a myspace page about Ditdah the little dirty whore*

the bean machine 303 7
06/12/2006 01:19 PM

Hold on Golly, I am on the phone with TBS right now................





They gave it a not funny...sorry!

Nurturing Vegetarian Eco-Feminist Chickens 286,539 61
06/12/2006 01:21 PM

Wah, wah, wah, waaaaaaaaah. </booby prize sound>

Ninja, Robot, Pirate, Snork 45,655 12
06/12/2006 01:21 PM

That picture is a bit NSFW.

GollyJee 520 7
06/12/2006 01:21 PM

Ahh little bean....so full of gumption. Come on, give us some more funny...you can do it!

turtle10 42,578 26
06/12/2006 01:24 PM

Why do n00bs come here, and then complain about the way things are. No one invited you; if you don't like it Frost-ing leave. Go to HOB, they are much nice there.

turtle10 42,578 26
06/12/2006 01:25 PM

They will give you an "r" too. Don't ask me for one

Ditdah 123,110 14
06/12/2006 01:27 PM

<action>laughs at GJ's inability to do action tags, and then replaces bad photoshop pics with the real thing </action> sends photo out to 500 people including her parents



Who do you think took the real ones?

GollyJee 520 7
06/12/2006 01:33 PM

Oh turtle give it a fuking rest like you were never a n00b. Pleaese know this,I really don't give a damn if more humans kill themsleves - the planet's crowded any way. If everyone on zug.com died it would probably result in the end of AIDS, nuclear proliferation and christian fundamentalist morons being voted into the whitehouse, so go suck on an exhaust pipe you abortion survivor and come up with an original thought.

Chance- This IS a Toy! 171,275 14
06/12/2006 01:34 PM

Actually Turtles wasnt a no0b. Some of us come in under the radar. Sucks for you eh?

the bean machine 303 7
06/12/2006 01:36 PM

.........

GollyJee 520 7
06/12/2006 01:39 PM

Yeah chance, it so sucks because I live and breath for zug. I do! I so want to be loved and excepted by you all because your opinions matter sooooo much to me!

</sarcasm>



Unless turtle fell out of his mothers womb with a keyboard in his hands, I'm pretty certain turtle is, has been, and will in the future be a n00b like every other genius here...

Gorks on a Plane 41,132 13
06/12/2006 01:39 PM

So when did self-deprecation as a comedic device and means of assimilation go out of style?

turtle10 42,578 26
06/12/2006 01:43 PM

Ok GollyJee, nice name by the way, your opinion of whether or not I was a noob means nothing to me. The thing is I wasn't an Emerson the moment I signed up. I came here because I found it amusing, not because I wanted to compain about it. You are just another waste of time sperm infested anal drip of life. It's too bad you weren't a stain on your parents' dashboard because you are useless here.

Mrs. JM 24,693 8
06/12/2006 01:43 PM

*takes Ditdah photo from her profile, photoshops her eating dick while taking dick in the @ss then sends photo out to 500 people including her parents. Then creates a myspace page about Ditdah the little dirty whore*



You really Frost-ing suck.

turtle10 42,578 26
06/12/2006 01:44 PM

Oh, and to add the funny:



poop

twatwaffle

blah blah blah Jilly is dumb,

$20

what is it with airline peanuts

means nothing without pictures

Phuc 237,919 21
06/12/2006 01:46 PM

GJ, read the commandments and the following page (all of which you should have read already), then read the user-written FUQ.



If your behavior indicates that you haven't read any of these documents, you will continue to take Shakespeare from the regulaz. And even if you clean up your act, the Shakespearestorm will take a while to die down.



I will use analogy given me by everyone's favorite shriner: If someone comes in our house and Shakespeares on the rug, we spank them with a newspaper. The more they Shakespeare, the more we will punish them. But even if they stop Shakespeare-ing, it'll take a while for the stink to go away.

the bean machine 303 7
06/12/2006 01:50 PM

Oh, and to add the funny:



poop

twatwaffle

blah blah blah Jilly is dumb,

$20

what is it with airline peanuts

means nothing without pictures





Don't forget the:

Starts with S ends with uicide!

Ditdah 123,110 14
06/12/2006 01:52 PM

I'm pretty certain turtle is, has been, and will in the future be a n00b like every other genius here...



Umm... what?

Gorks on a Plane 41,132 13
06/12/2006 01:56 PM

He's attempting to assert intellectual dominance.



Which will be useless when I hold him down and piss in his face.

SAVIORA Throws Knives 4,599 8
06/12/2006 02:13 PM

I have no need to kill myself; just others.

GollyJee 520 7
06/12/2006 02:18 PM

Ok Phuc, point taken.



# Thou shalt welcome diversity and new blood.



I could feel the looooove from day one. It's all good though.



# Thou shalt focus on being funny, not on being mean-spirited as a substitute for being funny.



...yeah, only good clean fun here on zug.com. 'Scuse my poor etiquette.



Oops I used "etiquette" let me stop before I get my balls busted again...

Ditdah 123,110 14
06/12/2006 02:27 PM

GJ, not that you would know, but there are a LOT of new people on here right now. Not all of them are getting attacked. Many of us weren't attacked when we started. If you try and fit in, learn how the site works, use the same kind of humor, and learn from what others tell you, you don't usually get too much Shakespeare for being new. A little, but not much.



When you come in, start posting like a Frost-ing moron, say nasty things to all the regulars, start stupid threads, don't learn from your mistakes, and act like an all-around jackass, we get bitchy.



Try and do a lot less of the second, and lots more of the first.

Gorks on a Plane 41,132 13
06/12/2006 02:27 PM

...mean-spirited as a substitute for being funny.



My lawyer tells me this allows me to be mean if I can "...be reasonably perceived as attempting to be funny." (Emphasis mine.)

Lupience- waiting for Lilies. 26,981 11
06/12/2006 02:37 PM

<action>Walks through thread with a can of Raid, sprays it in someone's face, walks out.

Ninja, Robot, Pirate, Snork 45,655 12
06/12/2006 02:39 PM

AHHH! MY Frost-ing EYES!

Beater 10,702 8
06/12/2006 02:39 PM

GollyJee, you type like a retard. A retard who can't type.

Lupience- waiting for Lilies. 26,981 11
06/12/2006 02:41 PM

Sorry, Snork- you should've ducked.

Ditdah 123,110 14
06/12/2006 02:44 PM

And GJ, talk to Gork. When he started we wanted to kill him. Literally. Cut off pieces of him a little at a time and feed them to his dog while he watched.



But he learned how to fit in, and now he gets regular offers of sex from other GABbers.

GollyJee 520 7
06/12/2006 02:57 PM

...But he learned how to fit in, and now he gets regular offers of sex from other GABbers.



...I'll pass on the sex freebees Ditdah, as I don't have life or health insurance at the moment.

Ditdah 123,110 14
06/12/2006 02:59 PM

HEY! I got that "problem" taken care of!

GollyJee 520 7
06/12/2006 02:59 PM

GollyJee, you type like a retard. A retard who can't type.



But you are a retard so who did God cheat the most?

GollyJee 520 7
06/12/2006 03:02 PM

HEY! I got that "problem" taken care of!



Yeah, riiight, I trust you...



*Note to self: never accept life insurance applications from Ditdah if she is the beneficiary*

Ninja, Robot, Pirate, Snork 45,655 12
06/12/2006 03:02 PM

BURNSAUCE'd

Evil Wee Taco 61,976 36
06/12/2006 03:03 PM

As a relatively new GABber, I'd like to point out that not every new person is hazed, only the ones that bring it upon themselves. My hazing lasted about three hours. Being snide and defensive when the old-timers call you out on being a Frosttard only makes it worse. Seriously. Dude you make Beater look smart and funny.

Ditdah 123,110 14
06/12/2006 03:05 PM

And being a sexy chick with a cute dog doesn't hurt.

When Midgets attack 96,092 48
06/12/2006 03:08 PM

How about being a cute guy with a sexy dog?













I suddenly feel like I've said too much.

Mr Fook 4,016 9
06/12/2006 03:16 PM

Meh.

GollyJee 520 7
06/12/2006 03:18 PM

Evil Wee Taco -



Oldtimers and noobs get equal frostarded back talk from me, doesn't matter which yanks my chain.



As far as making Beater look smart and funny, sometimes I'm generous.



...and it's wierd talking back to my own avatar...



...and tacos taste good with hotsauce...



...and yes Midgets, now I have a disturbing dogporn image in my head...

Gorks on a Plane 41,132 13
06/12/2006 03:18 PM

It's true, GJ- just search up 'Clocky'.



And I fourb'd your insurance remark- that's where its at!

SAVIORA Throws Knives 4,599 8
06/12/2006 03:21 PM

Yeah, Taco cut off my head once; I took it all in stride, started knife throwing, and I lost a whopping 600 lbs! What a difference!

When Midgets attack 96,092 48
06/12/2006 03:25 PM

GJ there is an old Irish saying that goes something like this..



"It is better to keep your trap closed and let people think you're a twatwaffle than to open it and let them see the semen on your tooth.

Now bring me a beer bitch"

Evil Wee Taco 61,976 36
06/12/2006 03:30 PM

frostarded



Ahahahaha. Frost-ing moron.

GollyJee 520 7
06/12/2006 03:32 PM

*pats Evil Taco on the back*



Stop talking about yourself like that buddy, it'll all turn around for you. Just pray on it...

Mrs. JM 24,693 8
06/12/2006 03:32 PM

Anybody want to help me move?

Mr. Slinky 28,185 10
06/12/2006 03:33 PM

<action> wasn't hazed when he started</action>



Because I, unlike you, am funny.

You just need to do us all a favor and just proceed with the request from all of us that you go forth with this suicide. It'll hurt less for you because maybe then you'll stop all your crying and whining because some people on the internet don't like you.



Oh, and how is it inside your mom's basement?

Evil Wee Taco 61,976 36
06/12/2006 03:33 PM

No.

Mrs. JM 24,693 8
06/12/2006 03:33 PM

Stop talking about yourself like that buddy,



Did you seriously go that route? Yeah. You played the "I know you are but what am I" card.

You're running out of material fast.

Evil Wee Taco 61,976 36
06/12/2006 03:35 PM

Goddamn it Slinky get out of my way!

GollyJee 520 7
06/12/2006 03:36 PM

Yeah, and you just came in asked people to help you move...scary talent.

Phuc 237,919 21
06/12/2006 03:36 PM

Got three words for all n00bs:



Be. Like. Zolton.

Mrs. JM 24,693 8
06/12/2006 03:36 PM

I can't even respond to that because it makes no sense.

GollyJee 520 7
06/12/2006 03:37 PM

No Slinky, stay there!



*picks up a beer bottle and breaks it preparing for violence*

Mr Fook 4,016 9
06/12/2006 03:37 PM

<action>Pushes JM off a cliff</action>

GollyJee 520 7
06/12/2006 03:39 PM

I can't even respond to that because it makes no sense.



Yeah but it made enough sense for you to know who I was talking to...

Gorks on a Plane 41,132 13
06/12/2006 03:39 PM

Is this thread about sux?

Mrs. JM 24,693 8
06/12/2006 03:40 PM

<action>grabs a conveniently places limb</action>



You should know by now, I will never die.

GollyJee 520 7
06/12/2006 03:40 PM

*giggles as Mrs. JM goes screaming to her death* tee hee

GollyJee 520 7
06/12/2006 03:41 PM

DAMN!

Mrs. JM 24,693 8
06/12/2006 03:41 PM

a conveniently PLACED limb.

Mr Fook 4,016 9
06/12/2006 03:42 PM

<action>Turns off delayed responding</action>

Mrs. JM 24,693 8
06/12/2006 03:42 PM

You are even more stupid than me.

Evil Wee Taco 61,976 36
06/12/2006 03:44 PM

<action>Turns to Golly and clears throat</action>Stop talking about yourself like that buddy, it'll all turn around for you. Just pray on it...



Did you seriously go that route? Yeah. You played the "I know you are but what am I" card.

You're running out of material fast.



*ahem*



You mom goes to college.

Mr Fook 4,016 9
06/12/2006 03:45 PM

You should know by now, I will never die.



Clearly you underestimate AIDS.

Evil Wee Taco 61,976 36
06/12/2006 03:45 PM

Your. Your. Frost.

Lord of Flames 58 8
06/12/2006 03:46 PM

GJ why won't you just die already?

the bean machine 303 7
06/12/2006 03:47 PM

My penis is small....there I said it...now leave me alone.

GollyJee 520 7
06/12/2006 03:47 PM

I haven't caught aids yet...

Evil Wee Taco 61,976 36
06/12/2006 03:48 PM

Bean shut the Frost up. We're dealing with Golly right now, wait your turn.

the bean machine 303 7
06/12/2006 03:50 PM

Damn, I was getting jealous that he was getting all the n00btastic bashings. I will wait my turn..............................

GollyJee 520 7
06/12/2006 03:58 PM

Bean shut the Frost up. We're dealing with Golly right now, wait your turn.



*punts bean to the side*

Jihad Joe: The Real Arabian Hero 6,067 8
06/12/2006 04:03 PM

Being snide and defensive when the old-timers call you out on being a Frosttard only makes it worse



What about crying yourself to sleep when they accuse you of using more than one account?

When Midgets attack 96,092 48
06/12/2006 04:06 PM

Jihad Joe is GollyJee?

GollyJee 520 7
06/12/2006 04:11 PM

Jihad Joe is GollyJee?



Midgets meant that as a compliment, Jihad Joe.

GI Jew: The Real American Hebrew 6,067 8
06/12/2006 04:12 PM

Midgets meant that as a compliment, Jihad Joe.



Speaking of suicide...

Beater 10,702 8
06/12/2006 04:20 PM

Oh, and how is it inside your mom's basement, GollyJee?



Low blow Slink. My turn.



How is it with a third of your finger missing, GollyJee?

SAVIORA Throws Knives 4,599 8
06/12/2006 04:21 PM

Anybody want to help me move?







Hmph.

GollyJee 520 7
06/12/2006 04:29 PM

Oh, and how is it inside your mom's basement, GollyJee?



Low blow Slink. My turn.



How is it with a third of your finger missing, GollyJee?



?...??



Ok Evil Wee Taco - I see what you meant now...

Mr. Slinky 28,185 10
06/12/2006 04:30 PM

Dumbest. n00b. EVAR!

Crackalaxative 68,758 11
06/12/2006 04:34 PM

All hazing aside, there are a lot of threads on this board with very few clickies. I would say the clickie to thread ratio is at it's lowest point ever. Some very funny people have left because this place is turning into a message board instead of a comedy board. You don't have to start a thread just because you don't get the "starts with an S" joke. That's what lurking is all about.

turtle10 42,578 26
06/12/2006 04:35 PM

Be. Like. Zolton.



What he means is "don't post much"

Beater 10,702 8
06/12/2006 04:38 PM

GJ, I would explain it, but it's more fun to watch as you flounder helplessly. If you lurked for more than 6.8 seconds, you would completely and fully get the "top secret ultra-protected no, no, you ain't neva gonna get it" humor hidden in my last post.

Mrs. JM 24,693 8
06/12/2006 04:42 PM

Dumbest. n00b. EVAR!



Music to my ears.

GollyJee 520 7
06/12/2006 04:47 PM

GJ, I would explain it, but it's more fun to watch as you flounder helplessly. If you lurked for more than 6.8 seconds, you would completely and fully get the "top secret ultra-protected no, no, you ain't neva gonna get it" humor hidden in my last post.



Mmmm...or maybe you just suck.

Ditdah 123,110 14
06/12/2006 04:47 PM

Gah! I left to do some real work and the Frost-ing n00bs went crazy!



Hey Golly -for the last Frost-ing time, STOP SWEARBOTTING YOURSELF!



Beanboy - you suck almost as bad as GJ.



GI Jew - sorry about the 2 accounts thing. It's a big deal, and I jumped the gun when Beebs said you were doing it. But hey - at least you're not GollyJee.

the bean machine 303 7
06/12/2006 04:50 PM

At least I know my place in the order in GABville. I may suck as much as GJ, but at least I don't swallow as much.

Fratberry 283,018 53
06/12/2006 04:51 PM

everyone's favorite shriner



YAY!!!

Crackalaxative 68,758 11
06/12/2006 04:53 PM

everyone's favorite shriner



You just drove that car because it made your dick look really big, didn't you?

Ditdah 123,110 14
06/12/2006 05:05 PM

Heh - I have new desktop wallpaper.



Thanks Frat!

Evil Wee Taco 61,976 36
06/12/2006 05:11 PM

<action>Shakes finger at beans and golly</action>I'm taking my dog out for a weiner walk. When I get back this Shakespeare better all be cleaned up. I mean it, this thread is a Frost-ing mess and if you're going to live in MY house you are going to abide by MY rules, do you hear me?!

the bean machine 303 7
06/12/2006 05:16 PM

You said weiner.....

Yorkie Thompson: Our country just got bitchslapped 60,724 12
06/12/2006 05:25 PM

Was this guy really going on for four hours about this?





Cause, um, that's cool, I guess.

Crackalaxative 68,758 11
06/12/2006 05:30 PM

"A Lot of GAB'ers wish they were dead"



After reading this thread again, I'm one of them.

When Midgets attack 96,092 48
06/12/2006 05:35 PM

I thought this was one of the funnier threads I've read today.









It was like watching a retard fall down a flight of stairs.

Ahhhh good laughs.

Fratberry 283,018 53
06/12/2006 11:05 PM

Thanks Frat!



You can thank Al for that one.

a time to reckon 20 6
06/13/2006 05:46 AM

yeah retard falls good laughs but better crys and the best dies of laughing and crying

Succubus 3,359 10
06/13/2006 07:16 AM

Reverse psychology works really well. I acted like I wanted to be hazed... and no one did. Sadface.

Potrzebie 1,790 9
06/13/2006 08:51 AM

Mmmm...or maybe you just suck.



I hate you

Phuc a Duc 237,919 21
06/13/2006 09:19 AM

You can thank Al for that one.



What he said.

Beater 10,702 8
06/13/2006 11:37 AM

yeah retard falls good laughs but better crys and the best dies of laughing and crying



For all of you who can't read this, you have to copy and paste it in the box at this webpage: www.freetranslations.com/farmerfranfromthewaterboy.

onE eyed monster 20 6
06/24/2006 12:44 AM

It was like watching a retard fall down a flight of stairs.





I don't think so . It was like an angel smackdowned to earth

Pram Sandwich 80,728 42
05/30/2010 11:27 AM

<action> look at the suicide picture </action>



Looks like a smashed pumpkin.



Except for the brains, which is a nice touch, by the way.



A+ THUMBS UP GOLD STAR