No. I will not show you my doobs.

Shemp, the other Kosher meat 22,222 17
09/20/2006 11:04 PM

Let me be the first to say.





STFU nOOb.

Zaphod Beeblebrox 31,599 13
09/20/2006 11:07 PM

Noobs who lurk should be smart enough not to start these threads.



That just makes you even more retarded than the aol'ers that show up now and then.

Neep- Do not annoy the unmedicated. 35,066 15
09/20/2006 11:10 PM

Shades of Grey was an interesting episode of Stargate. Of course, I guessed what was happening pretty quickly.

Mr. Slinky 28,185 10
09/20/2006 11:13 PM

So the other day I got really high and bought a 20 peice McNugget from McDonald's. I thought I was hungry until I could only eat about five of them. I wasn't hungry, I was just too stoned to realize it.

Humphrey 51,764 12
09/20/2006 11:13 PM

What? Not a fan of the Doobs?

shadesofgrey 5,445 7
09/20/2006 11:41 PM

You STFU Shemp. You're pretty much a n00b yourself.

As for knowing better than starting this conversation, well, unlike retarded AOL'ers, I actually enjoy mental challenge and stimulation. I don't wear my emotions on my sleeve, and I would not have started the conversation if I did not look forward to being the subject of jokes.

Never watched Stargate, but I will take your word for it. Tell your Mom "Hi" for me the next time you leave the basement.

Just curious, but what happened to the rest of the nuggets? Were you so stoned that you shoved them up your Emerson just because it seemed like a good idea at the time?

Not really a fan of doobs. But i hear that the cd sales are great in Sweden.

Jihad Joe- The Real Arabian Hero 6,067 8
09/20/2006 11:59 PM

You lose. n00bs are not supposed to post.



Shakespeare, you made me lose, too.

ringworm 68,315 13
09/21/2006 03:36 AM

What? Not a fan of the Doobs?



i'm a fan of the dobbs.

Phuc 237,919 21
09/21/2006 09:04 AM

On Thursdays, the office serves free bagels from Finagle's. As far as bagels go, they're reconstituted dried dog Shakespeare, but as far as bagels in Boston goes, they're prime rib dipped in gold and deep-fried in butter.



I had an "everything" with butter and a schmear.



That's just how I roll.

All the ladies love Briham and his Oozinator! 38,843 10
09/21/2006 09:09 AM

That's just how I roll.



Wait, I thought you said it was a bagel, not a roll. GRRR! Briham confused! Head...hurt...bad...GRAAARRRRRR!!!

Crackalacka! 68,758 11
09/21/2006 09:20 AM

If you have been lurking for a couple of months, why haven't you clicked anybody?













Oh yeah, you're only supposed to click the funny.

shadesofgrey 5,445 7
09/21/2006 10:03 AM

You lose. n00bs are not supposed to post.


I didn't read that rule. That's right. I didn't read the rules. Who reads anymore?

The dobbs aren't terrible. But neither are they great. I'm not a fan.

I had an "everything" with butter and a schmear.
If you like that, you should try this. Butter-fried Krispy Goodness. Hope you don't die.

Briham, if that confuses you, then stay away from any conversation that requires any type of intelligent input.. logic.. Oh who am I kidding. Just try not to think.

I have been lurking in the midst of orbs-o-funny for a few months... but during that time I was a nameless shadow... Only now that I have been granted a name by the great being JOIN ZUG can I truly exist in this online forum of funny.

Frost I have a lot of clicking to catch up on.

The Jerk 6,311 9
09/21/2006 10:43 AM

"Yes. I am a n00b."



Really? You don't say! I almost didn't believe you for a second.

DemoMonkey, leader of the MondeGreen Party. 166,252 10
09/21/2006 10:57 AM

Dear Shadesofgrey



Hi. Your spelling, grammar and ability to respond proportionately to abuse should make your acceptance here relatively painless. While we're waiting for your beating and evisceration to commence, there's coffee and cinnamon rolls in the back.



Welcome aboard!



Demo,

Head of L.E.N.





PS: I love those pants. Are they new?

BlueLep: Needs A New Tagline. 13,144 10
09/21/2006 11:00 AM

there's coffee and cinnamon rolls in the back.



How come I never knew this?!



BullShakespeare! I demand my cinnamon rolls!

Dave's not here - but he left it all sticky. 52,827 16
09/21/2006 11:03 AM

Let me just glaze those for you.

Tweak 18,881 12
09/21/2006 11:12 AM

and felt that this community of comedy was something that I would be happy to partake in.



Guess again. Everyone likes it here at first, "Oh!" they say, "A comedy community!" they say, "I bet I'd enjoy it there." they say. They're wrong. It's horrible. It's like hell but without the enjoyment of watching people you hate burn for all eternity you can't cook marshmallows in the lake.

shadesofgrey 5,445 7
09/21/2006 11:17 AM

Dear Demo,



Thank you so much for the warm welcome. I cannot wait until my beating and evisceration begins. I am looking forward to it so much. Thanks for the info on the coffee and cinnamon rolls. I'm actually allergic to cinnamon, so I would be happy to accept a crust of stale wheat bread in place of that. I like my coffee the same way I like my comedy.

Strong and Black.

shadesofgrey
Humble nOOb

PS. The pants are new. Thanks for noticing. I think they bring out the color in my eyes. Don't you?

Bieze 1,382 7
09/21/2006 11:18 AM

Hello dear, are you new?



No. I will not show you my doobs.



Someone's been reading the GABtionary. How did you miss douchenozzle?



w00t w00t! n00b h4xx0rzzz!

Tweak 18,881 12
09/21/2006 11:21 AM

Does it hurt to be you? Think up your own catch phrase. Preferably one that states something other than that which has already been stated in the title of the thread.

Bieze 1,382 7
09/21/2006 11:22 AM

Feel to burn, humiliate and or anally rape me. Can't be that bad, I'm from Belgium!

Bieze 1,382 7
09/21/2006 11:30 AM

And how, in God's holy name, did you not notice the Shakespearepile of sarcasm? How? Do you have your dick in your eye?



I'm sorry. I do not mean to be rude. I am actually a funloving guy who enjoys long beachwalks. And I want world peace!

BlueLep: Needs A New Tagline. 13,144 10
09/21/2006 11:33 AM

Bieze, please just shut the Frost up.

BlueLep: Needs A New Tagline. 13,144 10
09/21/2006 11:34 AM

You're more annoying that my ex-girlfriend on her period whole intoxicated.

the girl with colitis goes by 156,790 17
09/21/2006 11:36 AM

What's with all the n00b on n00b action? Where's the jello?



SOMEONE CALL MY BOOKIE!

I'm the Taconaut, Bitch! 61,976 36
09/21/2006 11:36 AM

SOG, you have potential. Two tips though:

1. Don't be so "omg I'm a noob crucify me." We will. Asking for it is so schtick for noobs.

2. Try to not get self-righteous too quickly. Wait a week or so, until everyone gets used to you.



Thus far you show great potential. Don't Frost it up.

the girl with colitis goes by 156,790 17
09/21/2006 11:37 AM

How? Do you have your dick in your eye?





That's really none of your business.

BlueLep: Needs A New Tagline. 13,144 10
09/21/2006 11:37 AM

Ah shove it Trae, i'll use my Mohawk on you.

shadesofgrey 5,445 7
09/21/2006 11:44 AM

"Oh!" they say, "A comedy community!" they say, "I bet I'd enjoy it there."

But I realize the truth... The comedy community disguse is merely in place to pull in unsuspecting prey. (Fragile people who are good for eating.)
But this is really a community of sarcasm and wit. That is something that I very much enjoy partaking in. Intelligent humor should be something that frightens children and small animals.

And there's nothing wrong with poop jokes either.

shadesofgrey 5,445 7
09/21/2006 11:59 AM

Someone's been reading the GABtionary. How did you miss douchenozzle?

I didn't miss it. I just hadn't had the opportunity to use it yet... Until now.

Nice to meet you douchenozzle.

scoobynoob 2,160 6
09/21/2006 12:35 PM

Shades, be a good boy and give out lots of orbs to unnoob yourself. I'll give your four on your last post, because well, it was kind of funny.

Beater of the Meat 10,702 8
09/21/2006 12:45 PM

Take your own advice, mother-Froster.

Pubah in the Punch 56,805 18
09/21/2006 12:57 PM

<action>Seconds Scooby's emotion</action>



Where can I get a lunchpail worthy of my Scoobysnacks?

scoobynoob 2,160 6
09/21/2006 01:01 PM

From Fun Lovin Criminals:



Running around robbing banks

all wacked off of Scooby Snacks



Got a bucket right here dude, wanna share?

Pubah in the Punch 56,805 18
09/21/2006 01:03 PM

<action>Skepticly</action>



Sure...what's the catch?

shadesofgrey 5,445 7
09/21/2006 01:04 PM

be a good boy and give out lots of orbs to unnoob yourself.

I will not resort to orb-bribery... I will not resort to orb-bribery... I will not resort to orb-bribery... I will not resort to orb-bribery... I will not resort to orb-bribery... I will not resort to orb-bribery...

Oh Frost it. I'll give you orbs.

DemoMonkey, leader of the MondeGreen Party. 166,252 10
09/21/2006 01:05 PM

Oh, and learn to close your tags.



Thanks!

shadesofgrey 5,445 7
09/21/2006 01:07 PM

I often forget to zip my fly too... Thanks for the input.

Harvard Chick 16,937 8
09/21/2006 01:27 PM

Welcome SOGrey.



I knitted you a sweater to help you fit in.

Dave's not here - but he left it all sticky. 52,827 16
09/21/2006 01:33 PM

Hi SOG. Have you had your bowl of dick yet? There was a hair in mine, it was disgusting.

scoobynoob 2,160 6
09/21/2006 01:48 PM

Dave, was it blonde or brown? Cause I'm missing one of mine.

Dave's not here - but he left it all sticky. 52,827 16
09/21/2006 01:50 PM

I think I see it, it's the really tiny wrinkled one that looks like it never grew in right.



Oh, you meant the hair...

scoobynoob 2,160 6
09/21/2006 01:54 PM

Oh, maybe this happened:



<a href='null'>http://cgi.ebay.com/Bikini-Trimmer-Shaver-for-T otal-Pubic-Hair-Removal_W0QQitemZ300030284617QQihZ020QQcategoryZ106315QQss PageNameZWDVWQQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem</a>

Dave's not here - but he left it all sticky. 52,827 16
09/21/2006 01:55 PM

yeah. maybe.

shadesofgrey 5,445 7
09/21/2006 02:09 PM

I knitted you a sweater to help you fit in.

Sweaters make me itch. Maybe a nice jacket or something... Preferably leather.

Oh. It would be great if that leather jacket came with a Harlet Harley.

shadesofgrey 5,445 7
09/21/2006 02:11 PM

Have you had your bowl of dick yet?

No, it hasn't arrived yet. Do you happen to have the FedEx tracking number so I can check the status?

Crackalacka! 68,758 11
09/21/2006 02:12 PM

I think you should change your name to "shadesofgay". That would get you accepted a lot faster.

BlueLep: Needs A New Tagline. 13,144 10
09/21/2006 02:12 PM

JUST STFU YOU FAGGOT.



Stupid n00b.

BlueLep: Needs A New Tagline. 13,144 10
09/21/2006 02:12 PM

DAMNIT CRACK!

Harvard Chick 16,937 8
09/21/2006 02:20 PM

Sweaters make me itch.



Asswipe, you haven't known "itch" until Trixie's introduced himself to you.

shadesofgrey 5,445 7
09/21/2006 02:28 PM

JUST STFU YOU FAGGOT.



Stupid n00b.

You couldn't come up with something better than that? I always thought you were more inventive.

Meh.

I'm the Taconaut, Bitch! 61,976 36
09/21/2006 02:37 PM

What the Frost is wrong with this thread? It's like, wide load capable or something. Is this n00b fat?

shadesofgrey 5,445 7
09/21/2006 02:40 PM

I'm not fat.

Just big-boned.

Dave's not here - but he left it all sticky. 52,827 16
09/21/2006 02:42 PM

Down Taco, off the couch.

I'm the Taconaut, Bitch! 61,976 36
09/21/2006 02:44 PM

Dave you stick it up your ass, I wasn't even talking to you anyway.

Bieze 1,382 7
09/21/2006 05:49 PM

You're more annoying that my ex-girlfriend on her period whole intoxicated.



And that's coming from the mouth of a bearded and tattoed blue leprechaun (not even mentioning spelling mistakes, OMG!!!!) perhaps twice my age? I must be REALLY pathetic then. Still I admire your blue ass. You're funny. Funny like a cancer, but hey, I find that extremely funny. No sarcasm intended there. Nope. None. Whatsoever. I'm sorry if this sounds sarcastic. It's not. I could only wish to revel and bask in your glory. It's people like you I'd like to become on GAB, and in real life. I could only hope for such an amount of respect and admiration.



Alright, I love you Bluelep(rapatient). -xXx-

MaddMatt - Steely Eyed Warrior/Poet 15,437 9
09/21/2006 07:13 PM

Shades of Grey, (SoG), I might be inclined to accept you into the; "Heroic Circle of Comedy Jihadists", if you can answer to me the following;



1. Create an ICD, (Improvised comedy device.), using a dead baby, a blonde, and a bunny with a pancake on his head.



2. Name the founders of Zug and the original form of their media entre.



3. Answer the question: "What is 42?"



4. What road game did Ollie introduce to Gab in 2004?



5. What is stage three?



And finally;



6. Exactly how many licks does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop?

Shemp, the other Kosher meat 22,222 17
09/21/2006 10:24 PM

You STFU Shemp. You're pretty much a n00b yourself.





I know.























So STFU Noob.

shadesofgrey 5,445 7
09/22/2006 12:23 AM

Interesting questions.

1. So this blonde was driving her green convertible Mustang through the desert of Arizona. As she glanced down from the rearview mirror, where she had been concentrating intently of applying her bright red lipstick, she saw a bunny in the road. "Holy Shakespeare!" she exclaimed as she swerved to miss the bunny, "That bunny has a pancake on it's head!" At that precise moment, an 18-wheeler flew by her going the other way. This startled the bunny, who dropped the pancake, which was summarily run over by the 18-wheeler. The blonde, shocked by her near death experience and ever so grateful for the bunny catching her attention, stopped her car and got out to thank the nervous rabbit. She dropped to her knees and scooped up the bunny in her arms and, after saying she was sorry for the loss of the pancake, began to laviShakespeare with praise and adoration. The bunny looked at her with it's big brown eyes and said, "Bitch, are you blind? That was no pancake. It was a Frost-ing dead baby."

2. The only one I know is John Hargrave. I have heard rumors of the inimitable Computer Stew, but other than that, I do not know.

3. Oh, let's see. 42. Is it 27+15? Is it 6x7? Oh, wait. I know! It is the answer to Life, The Universe, and Everything. Come on. Ask me something harder than that.

4. I drive an Anal Ranger.

5. What do we all hope to do at the end of a successful scheme? Profit.

6. 42

Dave's not here - but he left it all sticky. 52,827 16
09/22/2006 12:34 AM

That'll do newb. That'll do.

Harvard Chick 16,937 8
09/22/2006 12:41 AM

<action>laughs.</action>5 wasted hours of research.

shadesofgrey 5,445 7
09/22/2006 12:47 AM

5 wasted hours of research

actually:
15 wasted minutes of research.
5 wasted minutes of typing.
20 wasted minutes of waiting for a response.

Showing my Google Mastery? Priceless.

Dianapop 57,835 109
09/22/2006 12:53 AM

You're trying too hard.

Thud 68,497 19
09/22/2006 12:57 AM

And you're as funny looking as concrete.



But it's a promising start.

Jihad Joe- The Real Arabian Hero 6,067 8
09/22/2006 12:59 AM

My Orb distribution is off, so I will be two orbing all of bluelep and bieze's posts. Thank you.

Dianapop 57,835 109
09/22/2006 12:59 AM

Who the Frost are you?

Yorkie Thompson, heir to the British throne 60,724 12
09/22/2006 01:01 AM

Hi Diana! How are you?

Thud 68,497 19
09/22/2006 01:01 AM

If you mean me, I am Thud.



Nice to meet you.



Or not.

Dianapop 57,835 109
09/22/2006 01:01 AM

Oh my god. I think I'm ok. I'm probably going crazy though. How are you?

Yorkie Thompson, heir to the British throne 60,724 12
09/22/2006 01:03 AM

I am doing just fine.



What's a fine lady like you doing in such a bad part of the thread? There's all sorts of shady characters in here.

Harvard Chick 16,937 8
09/22/2006 01:03 AM

<action>pulls up a chair to watch the cooking portion of our regularly scheduled broadcast.</action>And you're as funny looking as concrete.



But it's a promising start.



Pot, meet Mr. Kettle...

Thud 68,497 19
09/22/2006 01:04 AM

Hey, but I know I'm ugly. Does SOG?

Dianapop 57,835 109
09/22/2006 01:04 AM

I have no idea. I usually try to hold out hope for noobs, but I just don't think I can do it anymore.

shadesofgrey 5,445 7
09/22/2006 01:05 AM

Yes, Thud. I know you are ugly.

Yorkie Thompson, heir to the British throne 60,724 12
09/22/2006 01:05 AM

There, there, Diana. There, there.



They'll all be gone soon.

Jihad Joe- The Real Arabian Hero 6,067 8
09/22/2006 01:05 AM

<action>Hangs his head and leaves</action>

Thud 68,497 19
09/22/2006 01:06 AM

Ok, I walked right into that one.

Dianapop 57,835 109
09/22/2006 01:09 AM

Hey! I like SoG now!

Yorkie Thompson, heir to the British throne 60,724 12
09/22/2006 01:11 AM

Damn fickle woman.

Harvard Chick 16,937 8
09/22/2006 01:12 AM

<action>heads for bed and waves g'night to everyone.</action>This thread reminded me that oxymorons are not idiots with zits.

LitaFord 61 7
09/22/2006 02:13 AM

Perhaps I was too bitchy but all I was offered was plain bread and water, no cinnamon nothing.

jeeniRoach - not herself recently. 47,787 51
09/22/2006 03:18 AM

<action>finishes spitting on the cinnamon rolls and pissing in the coffee.</action>Damn, I wasn't offered snacks. I was asked to serve coffee, cinnamon rolls bread and water.

LitaFord 61 7
09/22/2006 03:22 AM

Let's start our own catering company. We can give it a fancy french name. "LePisse LaRolle une de Cafe."

LitaFord 61 7
09/22/2006 03:26 AM

Wrong, wrong, wrong. It should be CinnaDePisse. Catchy don't ya think? Featured items may be Cafe D'Urne, DNAneighBaguette's with....

The Lame One Who Everyone Hates 106 6
09/22/2006 03:34 AM

I find that even on the worst of days, an inch thich coating of brown sugar on top of your daily toast always makes you happy for at least the next five minutes.

LitaFord 61 7
09/22/2006 03:38 AM

Oh baby, not everyone hates! But what is fun is to give that same breakfast to your child on the way to school and set them loose. Yee hah.

The Lame One Who Everyone Hates 106 6
09/22/2006 03:41 AM

Being a kid myself, at least at heart, I just love it when my parents allow me to eat that sugary breakfast, and i know they enjoy the thought of the teachers trying to wrestle me into a straight jacket, ut saying as it is the weekend, no school tomorrow, I am thoroughly enjoying the use of my arms.

LitaFord 61 7
09/22/2006 03:57 AM

It is Friday! School starts in a couple of hours....

The Lame One Who Everyone Hates 106 6
09/22/2006 05:20 AM

Not for me it doesnt...:)

Bieze 1,382 7
09/22/2006 06:23 AM

All the GABbers, big and small

Are having quite a ball.

Eventhough opinions differ

Our humour couldn't be any stiffer.

There's fat GABbers, also thin

But all of us are us, all of us are kin.



GABbing just crawls under your skin

Some would call it quite the sin.

I however find it nice,

as it gives my life much needed spice.

Yes, my social life is next to none

But that doesn't destroy my fun! ([insert AOL-speak])



Why a poem, why write it now?

Coz my mother's a big fat sow!

And my dad is just a tub of lard

Thinking, for him, is pretty hard.

And I was born an ugly pile of vomit.

...I do enjoy Wallace and Gromit.



I'm very young, live far away

But no matter what all of them say

I will not die, nor shoot myself

Not even for a fat blue elf.

And some advice for a female n00b:

To gain acceptance, show us sideboob.

Crypto- A master in the ancient art of N00b 800 7
09/22/2006 08:31 AM

As a fellow noob, let me be the 92nd person to welcome you here.

Have fun

shadesofgrey 5,445 7
09/22/2006 10:44 AM

But what is fun is to give that same breakfast to your child on the way to school and set them loose.

I find it more amusing to give the same breakfast to a friend's child right before they take the child home.

And don't forget the chocolate donuts.

Dave's not here - but he left it all sticky. 52,827 16
09/22/2006 10:46 AM

As somone with shared custody of a child I heartily endorse this idea and or product.

Pram Bag 80,728 42
09/22/2006 06:06 PM

Our humour couldn't be any stiffer.





























FAG.

Bieze 1,382 7
09/22/2006 06:23 PM

It rhymed, faginator. Get over it.

MaddMatt - Steely Eyed Warrior/Poet 15,437 9
09/22/2006 06:30 PM

You have done well SoG! I appreciate the Arizona connection thrown in.



However, the answer to number 6, was three. Yes, as the wise Mr. Owl showed us all many years ago, it takes three.



That aside, I don't see it as standing in your way of joining the HCoCJ. (Heroic Circle of Comedy Jihadists.)



Welcome Brother!



As a new member, we will be sending you your very own HCoCJ membership card, good for discounts at any 7-11 and 1/2 off any cab ride, (When you show your card. Tip not included.)



You should also receive a concealable whoopie cushion, sneezing powder, joy buzzer, the "Super Secret Decoder Ring", and my new book entitled; "ICD's: How to make them with ordinary household utensils and neiborhood pets."



Always remember; Two wrongs don't make a right, but, three rights make a left.



Ahshurliketalikum!

Pram Bag 80,728 42
09/22/2006 06:46 PM

STFU, you Frost-ing rag head.

Dogs Akimbo 211,584 32
09/22/2006 06:50 PM

Man, I hate these wide load threads.

Dave's not here - but he left it all sticky. 52,827 16
09/22/2006 07:37 PM

Wait, the new guy hasn't insulted Pram yet.

Pram Bag 80,728 42
09/22/2006 07:41 PM

I'm waiting for that.

shadesofgrey 5,445 7
09/22/2006 11:48 PM

So STFU Noob.

Shemp,

Thank you so much for posting on my thread. I noticed that your posts were very similar in nature. You only changed a few words. Do you lack the intelligence to come up with something original? Or are you just spouting off "STFU nOOb" to every person who has been here less time than you in the unfounded hope that you will more quickly gain acceptance among the more seasoned gabbers?

With that being said, I am announcing that any further posts from you containing only the words "STFU nOOb" or any variation thereof will be ignored. I will not be drawn into a battle of mindless STFU-ery, and I will not waste my time by bothering to tell you to STFU.

However, I think we all know what you need to do.

shadesofgrey

shadesofgrey 5,445 7
09/22/2006 11:51 PM

pram



n : a small vehicle with four wheels in which a baby or child is pushed around
[syn: baby buggy, baby carriage, carriage, perambulator, stroller, go-cart, pushchair, pusher]

So... are you a Baby Buggy Bag or what?

Dave's not here - but he left it all sticky. 52,827 16
09/22/2006 11:57 PM

So... are you a Baby Buggy Bag or what?



Like I tell my son, if you can't do better in that why should I keep loving you?

Harvard Chick 16,937 8
09/23/2006 12:00 AM

So... are you a Baby Buggy Bag or what?



Alex, I'll take "or what" for $500.

Dave's not here - but he left it all sticky. 52,827 16
09/23/2006 12:01 AM

inthan



I should learn to stop posting when I'm this tired.

Dave's not here - but he left it all sticky. 52,827 16
09/23/2006 12:02 AM

Alex, I'll take "or what" for $500.



See, that's why I love her already.















plus, I'm a man whore

shadesofgrey 5,445 7
09/23/2006 12:03 AM

I should learn to stop posting when I'm this tired.

Fixed it for you.

Dave's not here - but he left it all sticky. 52,827 16
09/23/2006 12:04 AM

yep, that was better.

Pram Bag 80,728 42
09/23/2006 12:25 AM

pram



n : a small vehicle with four wheels in which a baby or child is pushed around

[syn: baby buggy, baby carriage, carriage, perambulator, stroller, go-cart, pushchair, pusher]



Damn, this pile of bullShakespeare with nose hair is like my clone or something.



No, assFrost. My name does not mean "baby carriage". It's a computer term. Pram= P-RAM. If you had lurked like you actually said, and had not been digging fistfulls of snot out of your head with both hands, you would know that, because I posted about it awhile ago. Now be a dear and shut the Frost up before I unscrew your head and piss down your neck.

shadesofgrey 5,445 7
09/23/2006 12:33 AM

Hey. That's just great. I found your website.

For all that mean talk it turns out all you are is a big softy.

Meh.

Pram Bag 80,728 42
09/23/2006 12:36 AM

Really? OMFG, I FOUND YOUR WEBSITE TOO!

Dave's not here - but he left it all sticky. 52,827 16
09/23/2006 12:40 AM

and just where were you looking and what were you doing when you "found" that site?

shadesofgrey 5,445 7
09/23/2006 12:43 AM

That was enlightening, but I would prefer that you not show me any more of your home movies.

Pram Bag 80,728 42
09/23/2006 12:08 PM

Not even the one of me and Santa in Seattle's Catwalk S and M club?



Damn.

Pram Bag 80,728 42
09/23/2006 12:15 PM

Oh yeah, and I was lying about the origin of my name.



Yes, it does mean "baby carriage", and there's a story behind it, so sit down and shut the hell up and I'll tell it to you.



*takes out a gun just in case*



I used to frequent Channel One's Chathouse.com about ten years ago as Lucid. One night, everyone was posting their poetry, and there was a girl in the Mars room on the Next Level who didn't want to share hers. I prodded her (heh, PROD) and she wrote a poem about a girl who was having an abortion after being raped. I asked her if it really happened, and she said no. I said that if it had, when I died, I would look after the child.



I moved to Ohio to be with her because we fell in love n' Shakespeare, and she cheated on me, so I came back to Seattle to live with my controlling parents. She is, and always will be my first girlfriend, and the first girl I ever loved.

Pram Bag 80,728 42
09/23/2006 12:19 PM

She was also 270 pounds and four feet tall. I think she might have used me...



So Pram means "baby carriage", and "bag" means "bag". It was actually supposed to be a pun for "yam bag". The usual name I go by is Pram Maven, which means "child protector", more or less. Of course, it could have darker connotations, and when I started writing songs, I wanted to be a shock rocker.

Shemp, the other Kosher meat 22,222 17
09/23/2006 12:19 PM

Fag.

Pram Bag 80,728 42
09/23/2006 12:52 PM

Try-hard.