Captain Skippy with a parrot 41,253 13
09/30/2006 11:30 AM

The Avent ISIS manual breast pumps work really well.

Dead Battery-Wants the Ape's Hands Off Of Him 2,533 9
09/30/2006 11:30 AM

I can milk you...

Zorb 1,592 11
09/30/2006 11:33 AM

Quite the mental image there, thanx!

Dead Battery-Wants the Ape's Hands Off Of Him 2,533 9
09/30/2006 11:35 AM

If you like that one you should read the one about Rosie O'Donnel's ass.

Jane is confused. Wait...maybe she's not 173,958 15
09/30/2006 11:37 AM

This might make me a bad mother, but I never have and never will breast feed. I know it's what breasts were made for, it just seems...unnatural to me.

Just Sarah. 30,601 8
09/30/2006 11:37 AM

Skippy is right. Its the only manual pump that works decent.



Why he knows that, I dont know...

Zorb 1,592 11
09/30/2006 11:40 AM

it just seems...unnatural to me



Would it help if the kid had razor stubble?

Captain Skippy with a parrot 41,253 13
09/30/2006 11:43 AM

Why he knows that, I dont know...



The lesbian with whom I'm getting a divorce breast fed our oldest daughter till she was 3 and is still breast feeding our youngest who will be 2 in november.

Coprophagic Snork. 45,655 12
09/30/2006 11:50 AM

Producing defected offspring would indicate that you're a bad mother, yes.

Coprophagic Snork. 45,655 12
09/30/2006 11:50 AM

I'm sorry.

Jane is confused. Wait...maybe she's not 173,958 15
09/30/2006 11:53 AM

No you're not.

Crackalonius 68,758 11
09/30/2006 12:16 PM

For a small fee, I will suck out with my own mouth and spit it into the bottle for you. All you have to do is stick your finger in my ass lay there.

m squared 2,881 7
09/30/2006 12:20 PM

That is the sweetest thing I have ever heard. I hope you don't mind that I have the nipples of someone with double D's on double A breasts.

Chances are you're not me. 171,275 14
09/30/2006 12:23 PM

You are such a giver, Crack.



WHORE!

Zorb 1,592 11
09/30/2006 12:23 PM

Got Milk?















On chin?

Crackalonius 68,758 11
09/30/2006 12:24 PM

I don't care if your nipples are nine inches long. I'm doing this for the child.

Chances are you're not me. 171,275 14
09/30/2006 12:24 PM

Yeah, but you got to admit that it would definatley be a plus.

Crackalonius 68,758 11
09/30/2006 12:26 PM

Chat, you stupid.

Coprophagic Snork. 45,655 12
09/30/2006 01:06 PM

Ok, I'm not.

Sage of Seattle (Salaciously Sacrilicious) 36,465 8
09/30/2006 02:00 PM

I just spent the past 15 minutes trying very hard to milk myself into a bottle



Yeah, it doesn't usually take me that long when I'm in a hurry.



Has anyone ever tried that? If you're not engorged, it isn't easy.



Wow. You can sure say that again. I mean, taffy pulls are fun, but only when you're actually working with, you know, taffy.



I spent all that time, and didn't even get a full ounce out.



Huh. I never thought of measuring my output before.



































What were you talking about again? Every time I think of boobs I get distra.... hey, wow, boobs.

Mr.Glass 25,340 11
09/30/2006 09:42 PM

I tried milking myself once for a child.



It is now against the law to exist within proximity to it.

Mrs. JM 24,693 8
09/30/2006 09:50 PM

Wow... this thread is non-alcoholic, yes?

Bendy Straw 98,000 37
09/30/2006 10:06 PM

I had a hard time pumping, even with the Avent ISIS. The bigger problem, though, was that my daughter didn't want anything to do with the bottle. No matter what type of nipple I used. She knew it wasn't me, and she wasn't going for it.



All this seems moot though, because if your child is a year and a half, he or she should not be having milk every meal. While you are out, the child could be having a jar of food or something. This should only be an issue if you were going to be gone an entire day or overnight.



*shoots self because this is supposed to be a comedy board not a breastfeeding/childcare/mommy board so WHAT THE HELL???!?!!*

The Jerk 6,311 9
09/30/2006 10:08 PM

I have nipples. Can you milk me?

Bendy Straw 98,000 37
09/30/2006 10:10 PM

I thought Meet the Parents was one of the stupidest movies I've ever seen. There! I said it!

Sage of Seattle (Salaciously Sacrilicious) 36,465 8
09/30/2006 10:14 PM

<action>leans over and taps the microphone to make sure it's on</action> Paging Dr. Trixxie, paging Dr. Trixxie. Your patient is ready for his procedure now.

Mrs. JM 24,693 8
09/30/2006 10:14 PM

Chat is fun. just sayin...

Sage of Seattle (Salaciously Sacrilicious) 36,465 8
09/30/2006 10:15 PM

<action>leans over to his microphone again</action> Attention GABbers. My last comment was directed at The Jerk. That is all.

Dogs Akimbo 211,584 32
09/30/2006 10:17 PM

*shoots self because this is supposed to be a comedy board not a breastfeeding/childcare/mommy board so WHAT THE HELL???!?!!*



I support any and all posts about breast feeding. Unless they involve Ollie.

Sage of Seattle (Salaciously Sacrilicious) 36,465 8
09/30/2006 10:19 PM

Are you also an atheletic supporter, Dogs?

BlueLep: Needs To Quit Talking 13,144 10
09/30/2006 10:22 PM

<action>walks into thread, then over to Sage's microphone and throws it across the room, walks out like nothing happened</action>

Sage of Seattle (Salaciously Sacrilicious) 36,465 8
09/30/2006 10:24 PM

<action>had two turntables and a microphone</action>

BlueLep: Needs To Quit Talking 13,144 10
09/30/2006 10:29 PM

<action>walks back into thread and pees everywhere</action>

Dogs Akimbo 211,584 32
09/30/2006 10:40 PM

Are you also an atheletic supporter, Dogs?



Good one.



I am going to see the Lions play the Jets on October 22.

Sage of Seattle (Salaciously Sacrilicious) 36,465 8
09/30/2006 10:42 PM

Heh. Fag.

BlueLep: Needs To Quit Talking 13,144 10
09/30/2006 10:43 PM

Sage, we already know you are! No need to remind us.