ResurrectionRyan 523 4
10/09/2006 08:08 AM

It was kind of a funny post.

Man That You Fear 0 0
10/09/2006 08:10 AM

No offence, but this is not a suicide hot line. This is no place to talk about your problems unless you want to be fair game for being ripped apart.

Millie 107,039 10
10/09/2006 08:10 AM

Well, I'm glad you threw him out!



I'm sorry that you feel the way you do. People are going to make fun of this situation, though. Just so you know...



Just realize the problem is that your husband is a Frost-ing Emerson and nothing you did caused it.



Please try to reach out to your family and loved ones if you can. You should not be alone when you are feeling like this. Also, remember your children and that THEY need you more than ever. Stay strong for them.

Hodgmania 594 5
10/09/2006 08:11 AM

You threw out the baby?

Millie 107,039 10
10/09/2006 08:12 AM

You other two--stfu.

Man That You Fear 0 0
10/09/2006 08:12 AM

Side-splitting!

m squared 2,851 5
10/09/2006 08:13 AM

I know but I was really hoping people would have a heart, I know its not the place but I just am not doing anything right right now, including making sense or thinking sensibly. I'm trying to hold it together for my kids, but its late and I don't want to call anybody and bother them, and I really need you all to have a heart right now because I swear to God I feel like I'm going to break and I can't--I have to take care of my kids.

Man That You Fear 0 0
10/09/2006 08:16 AM

It's not your fault, m, just remember that no matter how attractive you are, there's always going to be somone hotter than you, and your husband will always be lusting after other women. Unless you're Jessica Alba. Damn, she is fine. I bet if you were Jessica Alba, your husband wouldn't cheat.



Anyways, hope that helped.

Millie 107,039 10
10/09/2006 08:17 AM

Look. The guy is a Frost-ing skuzzbag. I can't believe he not only cheated on you, but had the slut living in your house.



Don't allow him to have this power over you! You did nothing wrong. All you did was trust your husband, which is what you do when you are married.



Just try to get through the night any way you can and try not to let this consume you.

Declan McManus, as Yaskov 115,728 11
10/09/2006 08:17 AM

I am going to be sincere, then not.







Sincere: Medicinal dose of ice cream, and/or chocolate.



Sincere: Call a lawyer Tuesday.





Not Sincere:



Wreck his truck, cut up his underwear, burn his boots, and kill his dawg.

m squared 2,851 5
10/09/2006 08:21 AM

Thanks guys, you know I would understand if she was good looking but she is really fat and skanky, and I just have to question myself, if that is what he went after, what does he think about me?

Mr. Slinky - Already at the bottom of the stairs 28,117 8
10/09/2006 08:22 AM

Answer to all your problems begin with one simple letter.



S.

daisypie 49,257 7
10/09/2006 08:23 AM

Yeah, Jerry Springer...

m squared 2,851 5
10/09/2006 08:23 AM

Thanks Slinky. I appreciate it. And I would accomodate you if I didn't have my kids to worry about.

BlueLeprechaun 13,126 5
10/09/2006 08:23 AM

<action>can't stop laughing</action>Hahaha, Sucks for you!











And you made breakfast for the bitch after your husband Frosted her!!11on1!

Mr. Slinky - Already at the bottom of the stairs 28,117 8
10/09/2006 08:24 AM

And lunch and dinner.





And then probably sucked his Coleridge after he put it in her ass.



Consider yourself white trash.

Millie 107,039 10
10/09/2006 08:25 AM

He wasn't thinking about YOU--just his dick and his stupid ego.



Men cheat for stupid reasons. It has little to do with the attractiveness of their wives. If Halle Barry and Christie Brinkley can't keep their husbands faithful, than what hope does anyone have?



She probably made him feel "manly" in some way. Men are selfish babies sometimes and they will find any way possible to blame someone else for cheating.



He is an Emerson. The woman he was with is an Emerson, too, for cheating with your husband THEN making it worse by taking advantage of you and your generous nature.

Dave's is everywhere and nowhere 47,976 5
10/09/2006 08:25 AM

Your husband is a Frost-ing idiot.



I mean, damn.



I would chissel through a foot of concrete with my penis to get to that.

Chit 163,898 10
10/09/2006 08:26 AM

MM, you have to just remember that it will all get better with time. It's gonna hurt, but it starts hurting less as you realize like Millie said, that it wasn't your fault, and that you aren't dependant on him to be happy.



Buckle down cause it's gonna get ugly for a while, but promise yourself that you'll make it through the whole trip without doing anything you are sorry for later.



Lesser folks have made it through deeper pools of Shakespeare, and lived to tell the story...so can you.





Payback = Frost his buddies.

Declan McManus, as Yaskov 115,728 11
10/09/2006 08:26 AM

It is very possible that he is not only a loser, but a mentally Frosted up loser.





He might be seeing you more as the Momma of his chillen then as the sexy woman you are.



Which is Frosted, but so it goes.





He has probably wanted to do some really Frost-ing perverted stuff, so did the Frost-ing perverted stuff with this crack ho, instead of doing it with the Momma of his chillun.





And so it goes.

Millie 107,039 10
10/09/2006 08:28 AM

All the men in this thread, except Declan, are being Emersons.



And none of you have been funny yet. If you can't be funny, keep it to yourselves.

Millie 107,039 10
10/09/2006 08:28 AM

O.K., except Dave, Chit, and Declan.



Sorry.

daisypie 49,257 7
10/09/2006 08:32 AM

...this isn't going to be a funny post.



If you can't be funny, keep it to yourselves.



Yeah.

Dogs Akimbo 158,693 11
10/09/2006 08:34 AM

"I know most of you don't like me..."



Don't be so hard on yourself. Most of us don't know you yet.

m squared 2,851 5
10/09/2006 08:34 AM

I'm sorry, I was really hoping you all would understand, and I know some will shoot me down for this but I just had to chance it because I am hurting so much I had to talk.

BlueLeprechaun 13,126 5
10/09/2006 08:35 AM

Mill, I think it's time for you to be milked!

Millie 107,039 10
10/09/2006 08:36 AM

...this isn't going to be a funny post.



If you can't be funny, keep it to yourselves.



Meh.

BlueLeprechaun 13,126 5
10/09/2006 08:36 AM

MM, This is Gab. Funny stuff, not the, "I HAVING A LIFE CRISIS, PEOPLE COME HELP Me Blah Blah."

Millie 107,039 10
10/09/2006 08:36 AM

Blue Lep, that joke was not funny the first time. Now that it's about the 546th time you've used it, it's still not funny.

BlueLeprechaun 13,126 5
10/09/2006 08:37 AM

Same goes for about every post you make.

Millie 107,039 10
10/09/2006 08:39 AM

Pfft. Your opinion doesn't mean Shakespeare.

BlueLeprechaun 13,126 5
10/09/2006 08:41 AM

Yeah, Shakespeare, like what your cookies will be compared to MINE THIS YEAR.



That's right, I'm sending cookies, THE BEST ones ever.

Millie 107,039 10
10/09/2006 08:42 AM

Good luck with that. I'm sure your boobs are nicer, too.

Man That You Fear 0 0
10/09/2006 08:43 AM

I don't doubt that for a minute.

BlueLeprechaun 13,126 5
10/09/2006 08:43 AM

Good luck with that. I'm sure your boobs are nicer, too.



I love my doobs...

Sage of Seattle (Salaciously Sacrilicious) 36,343 5
10/09/2006 08:44 AM

Goddamn it, mSquared, call me, right now.

Dave's is everywhere and nowhere 47,976 5
10/09/2006 08:44 AM

Good luck Lep, I just bough a new 600W Kitchenaid mixer and I'm doing 6 varieties, not counting macaroons.







Of Frost, I think I've been fagjacked. Where the hell is the number for that baptist hotline?

Dave's is everywhere and nowhere 47,976 5
10/09/2006 08:45 AM

Yeah Sage, get here while she's still married.

m squared 2,851 5
10/09/2006 08:47 AM

Sage, I deleted it again, go to chat and pm me and i'll give you my number.

Mr. Slinky - Already at the bottom of the stairs 28,117 8
10/09/2006 08:48 AM

Yeah Sage, get here while she's still married.



Funniest post in this thread.

Declan McManus, as Yaskov 115,728 11
10/09/2006 08:50 AM

Blue Leprechaun.......





Face facts. You are little more than a Frost-ing Smurf.



I deeply hope that you get caught in a drive-by depantsing.

Millie 107,039 10
10/09/2006 08:52 AM

Awww, Declan!



Defending my honor (or boobs--not sure which); how sweet!

Declan McManus, as Yaskov 115,728 11
10/09/2006 08:56 AM

Millie--





Neither.





You have made me laugh.





Blue Lepmurf has only made me wonder which drugs he is on.

Man That You Fear 0 0
10/09/2006 08:56 AM

Declan just wants to see BlueLep without his pants. Your honour is just an fortunate side-effect.

Millie 107,039 10
10/09/2006 09:00 AM

Why would he insult him if he wants to get into his pants? That doesn't make sense.

BlueLeprechaun 13,126 5
10/09/2006 09:09 AM

<action>slowly walks out of thread with his heroin, advoiding Declan</action>

Closet Friend #1004 3,984 5
10/09/2006 10:02 AM

MarieMarie, "the answer" doesn't begin with an ess - right, Sage? - but rather, it ends with an ess.  Go and be with your kids.  Right now!  And then stay near them for as long as it takes.  There's no other bond as comforting and no other love as pure and unconditional...

Dave's not here 47,976 5
10/09/2006 10:06 AM

There's no other bond as comforting and no other love as pure and unconditional...



You've never had a labrador retriever.

Chit 163,898 10
10/09/2006 10:19 AM

then brought her to my house and had me taking care of her...cooking, cleaning up after her, washing her clothes





If I were you I wouldn't even seperate her whites from her colors any more.





That'll fix the bitch.

Hammerhead 59,084 10
10/09/2006 10:52 AM

From the "And now for something completely different" thread:



My husband plays in a bar band and he has "adopted" this drugged-out ho and is letting her stay at our house whenever she wants. She is also bi, which is stimulating to him. She is quite fat and not attractive at all and he really seems to think she's a great gal...she seems to think I'M a great gal...He says he just wants to "help" her get away from the druggies she usually hangs out with. So I'm thinking tonight I will make him hop like a bunny for me in the privacy of our bedroom and make his penis flop around. Thanks for the idea, Dave.





So, I'm assuming that he didn't hop like a bunny and make his penis flop around for you, huh?



<serious> Having read that post you made, you, yourself, gave the exact red flag that shot up faster than Ollie's dick on a playground. Someone in this mess wanted a three way, and he was testing the waters first. </serious>



<semi-serious> No offense, but I'm calling FAT DAUGHTER and CHICKENS IS DEAD? on this. Not that I expect proof, but it'd be damn convincing if you'd post pictures of you cutting off his schlong. </semi-serious>

Hammerhead 59,084 10
10/09/2006 10:57 AM

But I agree with Millie, it's not your fault. Don't do anything stupid or illegal, and damn sure call a lawyer first thing tomorrow.





Unless you want to forgive him, causing him to jump through hoops to win you back and posting the hilarity that ensues.

m squared 2,851 5
10/09/2006 10:58 AM

Well Hammer, I wish to God I wasn't serious. I just called his cell, and guess where he was? You guessed it.

Dave's not here 47,976 5
10/09/2006 10:59 AM

Don't call him. Don't forgive him, unless you want to do this again in 6 months. Just call that lawyer.

Hammerhead 59,084 10
10/09/2006 11:03 AM

If you say you called him and caught him in the middle of boinking her again, I would first laugh at what a Coleridgegobbling Frostweasel he was, and then feel sorry for you for having to go through all this Shakespeare.

m squared 2,851 5
10/09/2006 11:04 AM

Well, I wanted to see where he was. He asked me before he left not to keep the kids away from him. I said I wouldn't, as long as he didn't continue keeping company like that. I told him as one last favor to me, not to go to her. And he did. So that answered any and all questions I had.

shadesofgrey 5,426 5
10/09/2006 11:06 AM

Or call the Ghostbusters. They are very good at getting rid of slimy, Frosttard evil bastards.

And they have a groovy theme song.

Hammerhead 59,084 10
10/09/2006 11:07 AM

Gee, Dave, I guess I was wrong for making a joke about how much she could humiliate him and make us laugh about it. We'd never laugh at someone's terrible, terrible life problems. *coughfetuscough*

Dave's not here 47,976 5
10/09/2006 11:08 AM

You ok there Hammer? I think you have a fetus caught in your throat.



Little tip, if you're going down on a pregnant woman near term, don't swallow.

Hammerhead 59,084 10
10/09/2006 11:23 AM

For you noobs.



I would post another link to a thread where someone linked to a website in memorium to their stillborn baby. One GABber decided to make a Christmas e-greeting for all of us using the images from the site (a fetus with angel wings, to be exact). We believed the site was taken down shortly after it was linked here, due to the massive hits it received in a short amount of time.



We never joke about peoples problems, though.

Hammerhead 59,084 10
10/09/2006 11:25 AM

I would post another link to a thread where someone linked to a website a woman made in memorium to their stillborn baby.



It wasn't a GABber.

Chix Votes No Incumbents 238,110 14
10/09/2006 11:29 AM

a. close all your bank accounts and credit cards on Tuesday

b. change the locks

c. call a lawyer

d. install a burgular alarm

e. leave town for a while.



Time to put on your big girl pants and realize if he was willing to Frost you over while married, he is more than willing to do it while you're divorcing. Time for damage control.



Oh, and go Frost the hell out of his brother.

Hammerhead 59,084 10
10/09/2006 11:46 AM

My apologies. I just re-read that thread about Ford, and the link to the website I mentioned is about 3/4ths of the way down. Of course it's all gone now.

Coprophagic Snork. 44,997 8
10/09/2006 12:47 PM

Your husband sucks.



Which is bad if you're not gay and/or have a vagina.



Also, and this is somewhat serious, avoid alcohol for now.

DemoMonkey, leader of the MondeGreen Party. 165,746 8
10/09/2006 03:25 PM

I am sorry for your unhappiness and wish you all the best. I hope the people you are friends with from this board contact you and give you the comfort and support you need.



However, and i say this kindly, you should flee this place like it was on fire right now. It is the most caustic environment for someone heartsick imaginable. Go and do not look back until YOU are ready to make jokes about it, or it will eat you alive.



I will leave you with a reminder of 3 fundamental truths. They will not bring comfort, but they may bring clarity.



1) Men are all manipulative and evil.



2) Women are all weak willed and stupid.



3) You can swap the first word of statements 1 and 2 and they will still be valid.



Welcome to Cynicism, population: lots.

Salt -n- Jeppa 57,795 10
10/09/2006 03:46 PM

<action>Taps foot impatiently, waiting for the "fat daughter" moment.</action>



Man M2, I've seen people come to this place with their problems before and it NEVER ends well. This one did for some reason. Gab most be tragically growing up. I'm disappointed.



Anyway, I can't really add to the great advice that these folks already gave you so I'll just give you my best wishes.



Best Wishes and Good Luck!

Coprophagic Snork. 44,997 8
10/09/2006 04:02 PM

My status on Gab isn't high enough to be that lone jerk that drives her to suicide or child abuse. I'd join in, but I'm not going to start.



I'm like a hyena.



It's pathetic, really.

Chix Votes No Incumbents 238,110 14
10/09/2006 04:49 PM

I did toss in the go Frost his brother statement just to gab up my otherwise sage advice.

Roofie Raccoon 56,420 7
10/09/2006 04:58 PM

Listen to Demo. You will find more support from strangers in other places than you will from fair-weather friends here. As a comedy site we aren't capable of accustomed to only being serious. People in this thread have clearly tried very hard to do right by you but as each hour passes we will grow weaker until the black goo in our souls takes over and spills out onto the keyboards.



I repeat what Demo said: flee for now.

Beater of the Meat 10,691 6
10/09/2006 05:22 PM

Haha! m^2 is Jilly!

Beater of the Meat 10,691 6
10/09/2006 05:25 PM

Payback = Frost his buddies.



I'm your husband's best friend.

BlueLeprechaun 13,126 5
10/09/2006 05:26 PM

So beater wants to Frost the roller disco queen... Fantastic.

Bankey 70,607 8
10/09/2006 05:28 PM

Hey any port in a storm.

Beater of the Meat 10,691 6
10/09/2006 05:29 PM

I'd Frost anything. Present company excluded.

All the ladies love Briham and his Oozinator! 38,608 7
10/09/2006 05:48 PM

Chin up there, m^2. You did nothing wrong, so don't feel so sorry for yourself. It must be hard, but you're better off without someone like that in your life. Make sure you stay strong for your kids; they'll be hurting too. Find a friend or relative for help. Most of us on Gab will do what we can for you, as long as you're willing to tolerate the occasional insensitive comment.





Oh, and if this experience turns you lesbian, send me a videotape of it. Please?

Shemp, sleepin' late and smokin' tea 16,478 9
10/09/2006 06:15 PM

I like you M.



Well not anymore after this thread.



No wonder why he cheated.

Shemp, sleepin' late and smokin' tea 16,478 9
10/09/2006 06:20 PM

Seriously though, its revenge time.



Have a three-way with his best friend and some other chick.



Then sleep with his brother. If the doesnt have a brother, sleep with his sister, if shes not into that sleep with his father.



Start telling him that you been faking the orgasims for the last 20 years and his dick is soo small that he couldnt get a baby midget off.



Buy a giant dildo and start useing it all the time. Tell him you dont want his dirty little skank Frost-ing pecker in you.

Chix Votes No Incumbents 238,110 14
10/09/2006 06:59 PM

The best revenge would be a full on porn shoot with you and his dad released to everyone you know and the internet.



This might work against you keeping the kids, but hey, you have to make your choices in life.

Shemp, sleepin' late and smokin' tea 16,478 9
10/09/2006 07:01 PM

I know most of you don't like me





I like me just fine.





Its you Im not too sure about.

syncope 43,809 9
10/09/2006 08:37 PM

Payback = Frost his buddies.



Who is this guy? I've gotta buddy up to him.

Pumpkin Noggin-carving out a niche for himself 56,422 5
10/09/2006 08:37 PM

I threw him out.



Was so hoping (for your sanity and our humor) that this was going to read:



I threw him out.......the third story picture window, into a skip (dumpster) full of razorwire and rubbing alcohol.





SO disapointed.

Pram, the enterluding exitlude 53,478 11
10/09/2006 08:41 PM

<action> wonders which went first, the baby or the bath water?

Jihad Joe- The Real Arabian Hero 5,979 6
10/09/2006 08:49 PM

HALF!!!!!



</Eddie Murphy>

Pram, the enterluding exitlude 53,478 11
10/09/2006 08:50 PM

<action> sings </action>



Over the river and through the woods, to Dr. Phil's house we go

Coprophagic Snork. 44,997 8
10/09/2006 08:53 PM

DON'T SING!

Pram, the enterluding exitlude 53,478 11
10/09/2006 08:59 PM

<action> switches to his speaking voice </action>



The horse knows the way

To carry the sleigh,

Thru the white and drifted what the Frost?

Jolson 16,087 7
10/09/2006 09:08 PM

1. Based on that photo linked to in the gallery, you're hot. Dave is right in saying that many a man would want to chisel through concrete with their peckers in order to get to your poon.



2. Like it has been said previously, men don't always cheat for the looks. It can be the sense of excitement, the possibility of a threesome, or somebody who is willing to swallow, take it in the ass, and take it ass to mouth.



3. If you want to break the cycle of abuse then you will have to find the strength within you to not take him back. Don't fall into that trap just because it's comfortable and familiar. Move on, get a new life, start fresh with your children, and legally get everything you can fromt the Froster.



4. And, since it's gab and I can't let this post go without saying something crass and obnoxious, here's a recipe from the ultimate revenge:



Find a handsome, well built, and massively hung black guy. Let him Frost the bejeebus out of you while exclaiming how you've never been Frosted like that before in your life. Then, you could:



A) send a copy to your husband



OR



B) you can be the inaugural entry in the new GAB XXX gallery



Either way it's win-win.

Midgets 47,844 9
10/09/2006 09:12 PM

Find a handsome, well built, and massively hung black guy midget. Let him Frost the bejeebus out of you while exclaiming how you've never been Frosted like that before in your life.





That's just good advice there.

Big Irish Guy 176,041 10
10/09/2006 09:18 PM

Your husband Frosted a fat, unattractive chick?





HOLY Shakespeare, HILLARY CLINTON IS A GABBER!!1!!eleventy!!

Big Irish Guy 176,041 10
10/09/2006 09:42 PM

You realize that I will be bringing this up again and again and again. Just like miracles had an abortion and Harvard Chick was date raped.











<action>looks at his last post in this thread, checks calendar, realizes he's s few years too late for that joke</action>

Pumpkin Noggin-taking a week to harvest, GAB free 56,422 5
10/09/2006 09:43 PM

Look on the bright side......At least he Frosted a fat CHICK, not BIG a fat guy.

Jane is confused. Wait...maybe she's not 168,693 11
10/09/2006 10:49 PM

I know that I'm a woman, so I'm supposed to be nice to you right now and act like I'm on "your side. I have no desire to pat you on the back, though, and tell you that it's all okay and that it wasn't your fault. And to the people that said none of this was her fault- How the hell do you know that? Because she came here and told us her side of the story?

Jane is confused. Wait...maybe she's not 168,693 11
10/09/2006 10:50 PM

Okay, now that I've said that, I do have a word of advice for you, Eminem.



I understand that you are angry. And you probably do have a right to be angry. What you DON'T have a right to do is use your children to hurt him. I'm not saying that you're going to do this, or that you're thinking about it. I'm just saying that this is going to be hard enough on your children. You've mentioned them several times in this thread, and talked about how much you care about them and that you have to worry about them right now. Just make sure you're actually thinking about them during the next few months. There's going to be a desire to lash out at your husband. Just make sure that you don't do it in a way that's going to damage your children.

Chix calls for term limits. 238,110 14
10/09/2006 10:53 PM

"You did nothing wrong. "



Other than marring and breeding with this guy.... but other than that...

Chix calls for term limits. 238,110 14
10/09/2006 10:54 PM

Help, the black ooze is taking over!

Pumpkin Noggin-taking a week to harvest, GAB free 56,422 5
10/09/2006 11:08 PM

<action> throws Chix a (one)line(r)</action>

I don't want to say her husband is a cheating Emerson...but.....

Dogs Akimbo 158,693 11
10/10/2006 01:27 AM

Man, we're all gonna laugh when it turns out that MarieMarie is ChrisGarrett ChrisGarrett.

Millie 107,039 10
10/10/2006 01:46 AM

I just want people to remember that Blue Lep has offered to send cookies to all GABbers.

Jolson 16,087 7
10/10/2006 01:58 AM

I'd rather him send me a few muffins to buff with my specially made icing.

yorkydee 698 6
10/10/2006 02:41 AM

Honey, are you dumber than dirt or just to stupid to live? Why in hell would anyone come to ZUG for sympathy? As for the cheating husband....you had to have had a clue. You threw the Emerson out, now get on with your life. Oh, and don't forget to Frost over the slut he was with. That is loads of fun.

Millie 107,039 10
10/10/2006 02:41 AM

Fag.

Millie 107,039 10
10/10/2006 02:42 AM

Dammit, Yorkydee, you Frosted up my reply to Jolson.

Ditdah 115,023 10
10/10/2006 02:44 AM

That's not the REAL Yorkie!

Ditdah 115,023 10
10/10/2006 02:45 AM

Even the REAL Yorkie isn't real. He's SD.

Ditdah 115,023 10
10/10/2006 02:46 AM

I should stop snacking on paint chips after work.

Millie 107,039 10
10/10/2006 03:00 AM

I've already pointed out to that person that he/she should change the name.

Crackherone 68,154 8
10/10/2006 03:08 AM

I'm sorry honey!

If I had know you posted here under m squared I would never have said and done all those things! I swear, Chance meant nothing to me! I'm sorry she ate all the kids twinkies, and her making you wash that giant thong was just over the line. I hope you can forgive me.



ps



It's ok if I still flirt with Erika, right? I mean she is hot like fire.

MaddMatt - Steely Eyed Warrior/Poet 15,414 6
10/10/2006 03:30 AM

You know M2, If you had a Thai Hooker at home, she'd shank 'em both for you and then make fudge brownies and watch "Fried Green Tomatoes" with you.



But seriously;



1. If your life is so centered around another that you consider suicide, you have issues to deal with. Seek help.



2. Everyone gets rejected at some point in their lives. Deal with it! Your kids will watch carefully how you handle this. Don't set them up to be washrags who base their self image on someone else's opinion.



3. Women in your position often have a reduced self image. It might help you to send nude pictures of yourself to a total stranger. (Say, through e-mail, which may be in their profile.) I'm sure that the flood of positive feedback from this will make it all better.

Return of the Son of the Rockin' Donkey 76,817 12
10/10/2006 04:34 AM

m,



I know I've ripped on you before, but this is really a Shakespearety situation for you. Hang in there.

<i><i></i></i> 0 0
10/10/2006 07:00 AM

Wine is good for this sort of break down.



Get drunk, cry all day and then beg him to come back.



After about a week dump him again because you cant deal with the fact that he cheated on you.



Get drunk again and do it all over again.



Blue pills will stop this behaviour if you really want to break up.

Just Sarah. 30,476 5
10/10/2006 07:08 AM

I go away for the weekend, and THIS thread happens?



I miss out on everything!

Jihad Joe- The Real Arabian Hero 5,979 6
10/10/2006 06:17 PM

You were probably the woman her husband cheated with. EXPLAIN YOUR ABSENCE!

Crackherone 68,154 8
10/10/2006 06:24 PM

She might have been one of them. I mean, there were so many.

Pumpkin Noggin-taking a week to harvest, GAB free 56,422 5
10/10/2006 07:49 PM

Ok..I know we don't really care, but anyone seen M2 since yesterday?

BlueLep: Is Drunk At The Coffee Shop 13,126 5
10/10/2006 07:51 PM

She killed herself.

















About time...

Crackherone 68,154 8
10/10/2006 08:00 PM

Actually, I had to kill her. Do you know what child support costs are these days?

Millie 107,039 10
10/10/2006 10:17 PM

Meh, she's probably still on the phone with Sage.

BlueLep: Is Drunk At The Coffee Shop 13,126 5
10/10/2006 10:18 PM

Correction, Frost-ing Sage.

Pumpkin Noggin-taking a week to harvest, GAB free 56,422 5
10/10/2006 10:27 PM

Correct correction: Frost-ing Sage with the phone.

Pram, the enterluding exitlude 53,478 11
10/10/2006 10:43 PM

She killed herself.



Any idea where her body is? I want to have my way with her one first time.

BlueLep: Is Drunk At The Coffee Shop 13,126 5
10/10/2006 10:46 PM

Too late, Sage already skull Frosted her.

Sage of Seattle (Insouciantly Inebriated) 36,343 5
10/10/2006 10:54 PM

<action>writes list down of "people to call when he needs a body buried"</action>

1. BlueLep



You Coleridgeknocker, you said you could keep your mouth shut!

Sage of Seattle (Insouciantly Inebriated) 36,343 5
10/10/2006 10:54 PM

<action>writes new list of "people who need burying"</action>

1. BlueLep



Oh, what the hell.



2. Pram

BlueLep: Is Drunk At The Coffee Shop 13,126 5
10/10/2006 10:55 PM

You said that only if I got first shot!



You SO broke that contract.

Pumpkin Noggin-taking a week to harvest, GAB free 56,422 5
10/10/2006 10:58 PM

Horay...I TWO lists I didn't make!

BlueLep: Is Drunk At The Coffee Shop 13,126 5
10/10/2006 11:00 PM

<action>writes a list of people to kill</action>Sage

Pumpkin

Pram



Sorry, third time ain't a charm.

Pumpkin Noggin-taking a week to harvest, GAB free 56,422 5
10/10/2006 11:00 PM

Hey...I made you PIE man!

BlueLep: Is Drunk At The Coffee Shop 13,126 5
10/10/2006 11:02 PM

Me still hungee

Sage of Seattle (Insouciantly Inebriated) 36,343 5
10/10/2006 11:02 PM

Sorry Pumpkin, bro, but he jes' cold like dat!

BlueLep: Is Drunk At The Coffee Shop 13,126 5
10/10/2006 11:04 PM

<action>throws away list and writes a new one</action>People to hook up with at GAB but will more than likely fail



Taco.

Pumpkin Noggin-taking a week to harvest, GAB free 56,422 5
10/10/2006 11:04 PM

<action> throws Lep some Sage rubbed chicken</action>



Sorry....just had to be done.

BlueLep: Is Drunk At The Coffee Shop 13,126 5
10/10/2006 11:04 PM

That was supposed to be GABlanta...

BlueLep: Is Drunk At The Coffee Shop 13,126 5
10/10/2006 11:05 PM

Sage rubbed butts with Chickens?



So now Sage is going for married men?

Sage of Seattle (Insouciantly Inebriated) 36,343 5
10/10/2006 11:06 PM

Goddammit, Pumpkin, how many times do I have to tell you, Chickens and I are only FRIENDS!

Dave's not here 47,976 5
10/10/2006 11:06 PM

Fagjacked again.

Just Sarah. 30,476 5
10/10/2006 11:06 PM

You were probably the woman her husband cheated with. EXPLAIN YOUR ABSENCE!



Uhh....

Just Sarah. 30,476 5
10/10/2006 11:07 PM

Does anyone have her email address? Maybe we should check on her...seriously.



I don't Dateline calling me.

Sage of Seattle (Insouciantly Inebriated) 36,343 5
10/10/2006 11:07 PM

<action>shoots BlueLep for spoiling his joke</action>

Just Sarah. 30,476 5
10/10/2006 11:07 PM

I don't NEED...NEED!!!1!!

BlueLep: Is Drunk At The Coffee Shop 13,126 5
10/10/2006 11:07 PM

HI SRRRH!

Crackherone 68,154 8
10/10/2006 11:08 PM

The last fifteen posts are proof that Corky procreated.

Crackherone 68,154 8
10/10/2006 11:08 PM

I'll exclude Sarah from that list this time.

Fratberry 219,200 13
10/10/2006 11:13 PM

Wo wo woooooo

wistun to duh moosiwk

Wo wo woooooo

wistun to duh moosiwk

fo duh taaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaahme

Bankey 70,607 8
10/10/2006 11:13 PM

When did we move on to 'Buckwheat sings' jokes?

Sage of Seattle (Insouciantly Inebriated) 36,343 5
10/10/2006 11:14 PM

Sarah -



Her email is in her profile. I would strongly advise not emailing her right now however. She told me she'll keep in touch when she can and I said that I'd check back on GABchat off and on even while at GABlanta.

Fratberry 219,200 13
10/10/2006 11:14 PM

You Ethel.

Fratberry 219,200 13
10/10/2006 11:16 PM

Ethel = hairlip for Emerson.

Phuc 231,348 13
10/10/2006 11:20 PM

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!



I read the first post in this thread and nearly shat myself!!!



Would someone please summarize?

Crackherone 68,154 8
10/10/2006 11:21 PM

My wife finally busted me. Are you happy now?

Phuc 231,348 13
10/10/2006 11:26 PM

whuh' evuh.



Kudos for whoever came up with the "dumber'n Jilly" persona.

Closet Friend #1004 3,984 5
10/10/2006 11:36 PM

I have given him my whole life...    and



Goddamn it, mSquared, call me...    and



Sage, I deleted it again, go to chat and pm me and i'll give you my number.





Some will see the glass house and say that it is half full.  I see it as half empty...

BlueLep: Is Drunk At The Coffee Shop 13,126 5
10/10/2006 11:37 PM

<action>smashes the glass</action>Now it's completely broken. Good going.

Pumpkin Noggin-taking a week to harvest, GAB free 56,422 5
10/10/2006 11:41 PM

<action> kicks in the toilet and knockse over the fridge</action>



You missed a few bits, Lep.

Closet Friend #1004 3,984 5
10/10/2006 11:46 PM

Fools! There can be no streaking now...

Pumpkin Noggin-taking a week to harvest, GAB free 56,422 5
10/10/2006 11:47 PM

<action> pulls out gianormous bottle of Bactine</action>



SURE there can...you just have to be careful...I'm outta Band-Aids.

BlueLep: Is Drunk At The Coffee Shop 13,126 5
10/10/2006 11:49 PM

<action>smashes pumpkin's head</action>Oh wow, it really IS a Pumpkin. My bad.

Pumpkin Noggin-taking a week to harvest, GAB free 56,422 5
10/10/2006 11:52 PM

<action> picks up the pieces</action>



Damn you azure fairy...go get me some Frost-inglue!

BlueLep: Is Drunk At The Coffee Shop 13,126 5
10/10/2006 11:53 PM

<action>looks through the medical cabnet, grabs the toothpaste</action>WHERE THE Frost IS THE BACTINE!

Crackherone 68,154 8
10/11/2006 12:33 AM

Aaaaaaaaaaaaand the retard children run rampant once again. Sometimes noobs can be so stupid.

Pram, the enterluding exitlude 53,478 11
10/11/2006 01:11 AM

<action> speaking to Sage </action>



Actually, I would like to cremated, sir.

Pumpkin Noggin-carved and ready to scare 56,422 5
10/11/2006 01:14 AM

<action> toss Pram a "BE"

Pram, the enterluding exitlude 53,478 11
10/11/2006 01:16 AM

Heh, I cliked the link, Cracka. Hat really handed your ass to ya.

Crackherone 68,154 8
10/11/2006 01:19 AM

Yeah, but he gave me head later. It's true what they say about guys with tongue piercings.

Hammerhead 59,084 10
10/11/2006 01:20 AM

Fag.

Crackherone 68,154 8
10/11/2006 01:22 AM

We were in Mexico. So only the one giving head is gay.

Pram sucks at music, yadda yadda be original 53,478 11
10/11/2006 01:37 AM

And you're still in Mexico?



No.



FAG!



Oh, thanks, Pumpkin.

Juansidious 0 0
12/02/2006 03:06 AM

Bump!

Dave's not thanking anyone, I earned my shit. 47,976 5
12/02/2006 03:07 AM

WHY?

Juansidious 0 0
12/02/2006 03:11 AM

I HAVE NO IDEA! I'M KIND OF AN IDIOT!

Mrs. JM 24,640 6
12/02/2006 03:12 AM

Haha! m^2 is Jilly!



UH-UH!

Pubah, Run Tell it on the Mountian 47,449 11
12/02/2006 03:34 AM

<action>Arrives late and smells a fat daughter</action>

Pubah confused.

While he empathises with your pain and agrees that too many men are bastards, He can't help but wonder?

Why would you take care of any woman your husband is doin the nasty with?

Why would you bare your soul to people you already know to be heartless perverts using any angle to get a laugh?

How tall are you...uh...wanna go out?