Candy-Corn Chit 178,781 15
10/31/2006 08:52 PM

Backsplash !

High Priestess is A WITCH! BURN HER! BURN HER! 58,948 29
10/31/2006 08:53 PM

And I just let some kids off at the pool!

Ghostly Pubah 56,805 18
10/31/2006 08:58 PM

<action>Feels a sudden chill</action>



You didn't just take a crap at the library, did you?

Candy-Corn Chit 178,781 15
10/31/2006 09:21 PM

You didn't just take a crap at the library, did you?





Why, are they missing one ?

Ghostly Pubah 56,805 18
10/31/2006 09:23 PM

never-mind

Candy-Corn Chit 178,781 15
10/31/2006 09:29 PM

You might try The Dookie Decimal System.

Ghostly Pubah 56,805 18
10/31/2006 09:31 PM

<action>Laughs his ass off until the librarian directs security to escourt the stinky negro out of the library</action>



Pubah go now...



...really

I am the Walkin' Shemp- Among the living! 22,222 17
10/31/2006 09:32 PM

Tell Tarzan, and Capt. Caveman, and Yoda that Shemp say hello.

Johnny Virgil 2,359 7
10/31/2006 10:41 PM

It's to get rid of the leftover free-drifting fibers from the last person's flush.

Dogs Akimbo 211,584 32
10/31/2006 10:53 PM

Why do people feel the need to...flush a toilet before they take a poop in it?



I do it to create negative ions.

BillyBones 620 7
10/31/2006 10:54 PM

Sometimes, if my peripheral vision doesn't spot anything out of the ordinary, I'll just sit right down. I'll give a cursory toilet-paper wipe to the seat if it seems like the kind of place that needs it, or if I detect some sort of out-of-place texture disrupting the shiny smoothness of the toilet seat. Occasionally I'll give a good wipedown if there's droplets and little hairs and stuff all over.



There are some people who are real prissy when it comes to public bathrooms. You know, the ones who use two or three of those sanitary seat covers so that their ass is perfectly protected against all forms of seatborne contagion, but upon leaving end up causing a garderobe-malfunction of epic proportions so that when YOU go to take a crap you're faced with this yellow-ringed pile of wusscrement forever spared from a sewery fate by a soggy hammock of artfully arranged germ-free rump doilies.



But I'm not about to go condoming up the seat like some sort of terrified bacillophobe. I mean, worst-case scenario, any seat coated thick enough to have me reaching for the paper donut is gonna need hovering over anyway. For me, the line between "needs a cover" and "cover won't do any good" is too fine to call.



I draw the line at ass-dandruff.



Seeing that thinly-sprinkled coating of waxy butt-flakes...



Now, I've known enough overweight people that I might pause at the little eiffel-tower shaped squeezing of linty buttgrease sometimes left behind by the obese like some sort of cheese-scented Parisian souveneir.

BillyBones 620 7
10/31/2006 10:54 PM

Thats when I consider the sheer folly of Operation Paper Savior. I mean, we're talking about what is basically a flat sheet of paper, here, that's gonna displace a lot of air. You ever see what happens when you drop something flat on a dusty floor? No. No, the idea of a swirling vortex of dermal doom wafting up around the edges of the seatcover is more than I can handle. I mean, what the Frost, what if I BREATHED SOME OF IT IN?!



Hovering -- out of the question. Wearing a microfiber shirt all day, slowly building up static electricity -- by this time I'm a walking Tesla experiment. One millimeter too close and those floaty little ass dandruff bastards are suddenly magnetizing to my ass like a handful of anthrax-filled helium balloons released into a crowded boardroom. I don't think so.

Candy-Corn Chit 178,781 15
10/31/2006 11:00 PM

Or you could just Shakespeare at home !

Mr. Slinky 28,185 10
10/31/2006 11:01 PM

Woah woah woah now Chit. You're making entirely too much sense here.

KChikita - Not Chi Chi Felipe 128,316 98
10/31/2006 11:02 PM

Too many words! I'm confused!

Huggiesdsc 167 7
10/31/2006 11:03 PM

Someone ^^ has ^^ put ^^ a ^^ little ^^ too ^^ much ^^ thought ^^ into ^^ the ^^ matter



Not namin any names...

Huggiesdsc 167 7
10/31/2006 11:05 PM

*sigh* KChicita... you're like that little kid who wanders into the dodgeball game just in time to get nailed in the face by a stray ball. God I love that little kid...

KChikita - Not Chi Chi Felipe 128,316 98
10/31/2006 11:09 PM

<action>sighs.</action>STFU NOOB!

HammerHeadless Horseman 59,399 14
11/01/2006 12:43 AM

Hey, Bones, the normal attention span of a GABber is...ooohh, look, something shiney...

Spooky Costumed Bikini 62,262 18
11/01/2006 04:21 AM

*sigh* KChicita... you're like that little kid who wanders into the dodgeball game just in time to get nailed in the face by a stray ball. God I love that little kid...



You had nearly ten minutes to post your comment. Three people posted in between you and your desired target.



Now why do you gotta go and blame KChiki? You're just all around slow.

Jaggy 11,895 13
11/01/2006 04:29 AM

Holy Shakespeare, are you looking through my window? I flushed first because my roommate came home wasted, vomitted, and left again without flushing.



Yes, it's a normal Wednesday night in Kiwiland.

Spooky Costumed Bikini 62,262 18
11/01/2006 04:35 AM

Holy Shakespeare, are you looking through my window? I flushed first because my roommate came home wasted, vomitted, and left again without flushing.



I think that's a really valid reason to flush first, but you ought to have rubbed their nose in it before you did. Now how will they ever learn?

Spooky Costumed Bikini 62,262 18
11/01/2006 04:37 AM

And Jaggy, I'm leaving for work right now, but you should add me to whatever IM you have. For later.



Wink wink nudge nudge - wait? What am I winking about?

Tucker Jolson 16,163 11
11/01/2006 02:35 PM

<action>gets comfortable in his Shakespearety pants.</action>You could just do what I do.