Just Sarah 30,601 8
01/23/2007 07:25 PM

Oh, and this also reminded me of the time my dad came home from the tavern drunk and told me how he saw the Tooth Fairy at his house one time.

TacoCrunch: Classic 61,976 36
01/23/2007 07:25 PM

I got a dollar, and I've lost teeth within the past decade.

trojan LOVE doll 3,467 8
01/23/2007 07:26 PM

I don't have kids, but I would think a special coin would be more fun. Buy some stamps at the machine in the post office lobby. It will give you change in Susan B Anthony or Sacajawea dollars.

Ornithopter Simulation 585 7
01/23/2007 07:27 PM

Mine complained about quarters, too, so I told them I could help them make more by kicking out the rest of their teeth.

They really liked the quarters.

dropkick brody 43,090 12
01/23/2007 07:28 PM

I got either 1 or 50p. Unfortunately for me, these days, the tooth fairy does not leave money for root canals. Stingy bitch.

Stone Cold Bikini 62,262 18
01/23/2007 07:30 PM

All I ever got was a quarter, because my family was poor growing up.


All my friends got dollars.


I'm not bitter.

Chit 178,781 15
01/23/2007 07:31 PM

It all depends on if it fell out naturally, or if mommy knocked it out and needs her to keep it a secret.

TacoCrunch: Classic 61,976 36
01/23/2007 07:31 PM

It it was a Canadian dollar, so really you got like three cents.

Stone Cold Bikini 62,262 18
01/23/2007 07:31 PM

I don't have kids, but I would think a special coin would be more fun. Buy some stamps at the machine in the post office lobby. It will give you change in Susan B Anthony or Sacajawea dollars.

When/if you do have kids, you're going to be an awesome mommy.

I'm serious.

Stone Cold Bikini 62,262 18
01/23/2007 07:33 PM

It it was a Canadian dollar, so really you got like three cents.

I can't wait until a few years from now, since USD keeps dropping, so we can make those jokes.

TacoCrunch: Classic 61,976 36
01/23/2007 07:35 PM

Yeah but the Chinese will be making the joke anyway.

The Mailman, as portrayed by Jacques Tati 176,450 56
01/23/2007 07:41 PM

Wait until she loses the tooth, then paint it blue and sell it on eBay with the following description:

"Tiny Bluetooth device - So simple, a child could use it!"

Captain Skippy 41,253 13
01/23/2007 07:45 PM

Yeah but the Chinese will be making the joke anyway.

The Chinese pin their currency to the dollar, so the exchange rate is constant since we're their biggest trade partner.

young grasshopper.

Lucky Charms 171,275 14
01/23/2007 07:49 PM

Well I got 5 bucks a tooth from my mom, saved the tooth and used it at my dads house where I got a dollar a tooth.

Divorce works well for money minded children.

That's What She Said 27,416 24
01/23/2007 07:50 PM

I got a rock.

TacoCrunch: Classic 61,976 36
01/23/2007 07:52 PM

When the US falls, I'm sure we'll be taking at least Canada and Mexico with us.

Captain Skippy 41,253 13
01/23/2007 07:55 PM

isn't that what they said about your mom?

TacoCrunch: Classic 61,976 36
01/23/2007 07:56 PM

My mom's taking Canada and Mexico down with her? What?

The Mailman, as portrayed by Jacques Tati 176,450 56
01/23/2007 07:56 PM

When I was a child, I received 1 Franc per tooth. (approx. 25 cents)

But my mother made me pay 2 Francs if I wanted to keep the tooth that grew in its place.

Cushie Butterfield 86,705 14
01/23/2007 07:56 PM

5 bucks, same as in town.

M.I.B. - Midgets in Black 96,092 48
01/23/2007 08:15 PM

Mine get $4, but I make them put half of it in their piggy bank. I also tell them the Tooth Fairy doesn't come unless the house is clean.
Cheaper than a maid!

BBM: Going out of Business Sale! All Sex Must Go! 6,369 10
01/23/2007 08:29 PM

For my first tooth, I got $5, because it was "special", and It also came with a tiny rolled up note from the "tooth faerie". After that I got about $1, or 75 cents.

Werehampsta 6,375 8
01/23/2007 08:49 PM

TacoCrunch, the reason your teeth were worth less is that your "customers" kicked them out of your mouth. Broken ones aren't worth as much.

TacoCrunch: Classic 61,976 36
01/23/2007 08:57 PM

My teeth were worth a dollar a pop. Where the Frost did you get "less" from that?

Vroom-Vroom 30,762 12
01/23/2007 09:47 PM

Losing my teeth was its own reward.

Erika Le' Vaginae 76,152 9
01/23/2007 09:48 PM

I got $10 a tooth, but I was also a spoiled brat.

The Rev. Dr. Big Irish Guy Jr. 203,956 21
01/23/2007 09:50 PM

Was?

BlaiseMilla 67,037 13
01/23/2007 09:50 PM

On an unrelated note: Nancy Pelosi looks like she's sucking on a turd.

Leroy Calhoun 77,546 17
01/23/2007 10:05 PM

I got a Frost-ing dime.

Erika Le' Vaginae 76,152 9
01/23/2007 10:07 PM

Yeah but Donk, you're like 100 years older than me, so really it all makes sense.

Millie 116,988 28
01/23/2007 10:09 PM

I used to get a nickel a tooth.

Leroy Calhoun 77,546 17
01/23/2007 10:15 PM

Yeah but Donk, you're like 100 years older than me, so really it all makes sense.

No, I'm not 100 years older than you. I'm just 1/1000th as valuable as you. And I'll even admit to that.

Millie 116,988 28
01/23/2007 10:18 PM

That means I'm 1/20 of her worth.

How depressing.

Millie 116,988 28
01/23/2007 10:18 PM

Hey, a bag of M&Ms was a nickel when I was a kid. So were most other candy bars. So it wasn't that bad.

Satan's Little Helper 19,912 12
01/24/2007 06:06 AM

If I have kids, there will be no Tooth Fairy. If they put the tooth under their pillow because other kids told them about the tooth fairy... then they will wake up to find a bright, shiny tooth under their pillow the next morning.

There will also be no Easter Bunny or Santa Claus.

Yeah, I'd make a great dad.

TacoCrunch: Classic 61,976 36
01/24/2007 12:23 PM

If I have kids I'm going to give them presents at Christmas. However, I'll tell them all their friends believe in Santa Clause because their parents lie to them because they think they're dumb enough to believe it and have no respect for them.

I plan on dealing with a lot of angry phone calls down the road.

Crackalacka!! 68,758 11
01/24/2007 12:25 PM

I'm just afraid my son will wake up while I'm putting the money under his pillow and think his dad is some kind of fairy.

Robin® 14,626 10
01/24/2007 12:46 PM

First off, I had a special tooth shaped pillow with a pocket to put the tooth in. I got special coins when I was younger, half dollars and such, that my parents would trade me for "real money" then my teeth quit falling out on their own and had to be ripped out by the dentist. For a while I had two rows of teeth. I don't remember the tooth fairy coming for those.

I like the odd currency and have a collection of it now to give to my kids.

Pumpkin Noggin-GABs resident mispeler 56,642 8
01/24/2007 01:03 PM

For a while I had two rows of teeth. I don't remember the tooth fairy coming for those.

She was too scared

Smokatronic 2,388 9
01/24/2007 01:15 PM

Put a quarter under the pillow, then get a small sack and spread some quarters around the hallway next to the sack. Say the tooth fairy tripped on her way in, adds a bit of realism. Also, press a brush of nail polish on the window sill to make "fairy footprints". My boys are gonna grow up to be gay. Sigh...

Robin® 14,626 10
01/24/2007 02:25 PM

print out one of the "squashed fairy" pictures tape it to the outside of the window with a little bag of quarters next to it on the sill. Suggest that you should have left the window open. Then you never have to worry about iving your kid tooth money again.

Just the shrink fees.

Pumpkin Noggin-GABs resident mispeler 56,642 8
01/24/2007 02:29 PM

<action> calls the wifey</action>

Hey there...PROBLEM SOLVED! Listen to this.....print out one of the "squashed fairy" pictures tape it to the outside of the window with a little bag of quarters next to it on the sill. Suggest that you should have left the window open. Then you never have to worry about iving your kid tooth money again.

Rowdy Roddy Felipe 161,353 14
01/24/2007 02:34 PM

The hottest thing about a flat-chested 15 year old girl is that you can knock out her front teeth and pretend she's 6.

Rowdy Roddy Felipe 161,353 14
01/24/2007 02:34 PM

Jesus, what is wrong with me lately?

Pumpkin Noggin-GABs resident mispeler 56,642 8
01/24/2007 02:34 PM

You're channeling Ollie again, man....you need to drink less...or more.

Pram Behavin' 80,728 42
01/25/2007 12:30 AM

So how much do you give kids nowadays?

Two bananas,






































mashed.

Dogs Akimbo 211,584 32
01/25/2007 09:58 AM

On Christmas Eve, my father would fire off a shotgun in the backyard and then come inside and tell that since Santa had committed suicide, there wouldn't be any gifts.



Sorry, I couldn't wait 11 months.

Red Headed Jep-Child (Don't tell Sylvester!) 58,758 13
01/25/2007 10:02 AM

$20. Same as in town.


THAT IS THE FIRST TIME I HAVE EVER TYPED THAT PHRASE!!! w00t!

Jesus Shrist 14,124 11
01/25/2007 10:07 AM

Jesus, what is wrong with me lately?

Chi-CHi, since you asked, you spend too much time online with strangers. Spend more time with me and the boys. (Thursday night is poker night!)

Dogs Akimbo 211,584 32
01/25/2007 10:08 AM

I'm sorry, but since you bolded the wrong part, we're gonna have to disallow your post.

Red Headed Jep-Child (Don't tell Sylvester!) 58,758 13
01/25/2007 10:26 AM

Frost.

Dogs Akimbo 211,584 32
01/25/2007 11:04 PM

The judges have come back from drinking vodka and eating chicken wings and have decided to award you half points.

Just Sarah 30,601 8
02/09/2007 09:09 PM

So today, I pulled the damn tooth out myself.

It was just hanging there, and I didn't want her to swallow it.

So after a 20 minute sobfest and after my daughter telling me that shes mad at me, I officially feel like the meanest mom on earth.

So instead of getting $5, shes getting Cinderella 3 on DVD.

And ice cream.

Captain Skippy 41,253 13
02/09/2007 09:10 PM

Cinderella 3

3?

Just Sarah 30,601 8
02/09/2007 09:11 PM

Yep. They made a 3.

Apparently, Disney loves overusing the whole "child slavery" fairytale.

Luscious Red Heart-shaped Strawberry 98,000 37
02/09/2007 09:18 PM

Yep, at this moment my daughter has the first and second one checked out of the library.

Pumpkin Noggin- Who wants to be my Valentine? 56,642 8
02/09/2007 09:19 PM

Just saw #3, it's not bad.

And your not the worst mom on earth.

It's a tie between mine and the woman who gave birth to Pram.

MAX POWERS 68,758 11
02/09/2007 09:20 PM

I make my son watch Family Guy and Faces of Death repeatedly. He used to cry and stuff, but now he just sniffles a little.

turtle10 42,578 26
02/09/2007 09:27 PM

Sarah I have something you can pull, and then feed me ice cream after.

Just Sarah 30,601 8
02/09/2007 09:27 PM

My daughter likes Family Guy because she thinks when cartoons say "Son of a bitch", its funny.

Captain Skippy 41,253 13
02/09/2007 09:30 PM

my 4 yr old daughter says "son of a bitch" the 2 year old says "Shakespeare"

it's cute when one of them drops something and you hear "Shakespeare!" "SON OF A BITCH" "OH DAMN"

Luscious Red Heart-shaped Strawberry 98,000 37
02/09/2007 09:31 PM

My daughter likes the Evil Strawberry flash that is in my profile. I keep having to tell her that calling people stupid is bad, and so is smooshing people.

She also likes the Albuquerque song off the same website.

Jolson picked the wrong year to stop sniffing glue 16,163 11
02/09/2007 09:42 PM

I tried explaining inflation to her and how she'll get a fistful of Washingtons as opposed to my one shiny half dollar, but all I got was a blank stare and an "I want a banana."

If the girl wants a banana give the girl a banana. Just be sure that Porn Store Johnny gets her the right size for her pre-pubescent vajayjay.

MAX POWERS 68,758 11
02/09/2007 09:44 PM

My daughter likes Family Guy because she thinks when cartoons say "Son of a bitch", its funny.


We like it for the same reasons then.

Blueberry Pan-cake 2,382 8
02/10/2007 05:47 PM

There's a lesson in all this.

High Priestess, fuck me untill I don't know math 58,948 29
02/10/2007 07:31 PM

I got fitty cent. Not the rapper, but 2 quarters. My little sister got a dollar. I used to get a dollar allowance, she gets 5. My parents have gotten soft. I make up for it by beating her with a sack of oranges. They don't leave brusies, unlike socks full of pennies.

TomSFox 352 6
02/10/2007 08:59 PM

I didn't get any money for my teeth because my parents didn't make me believe in the tooth fairy.

Damn honest parents!

Sexy red Undies for Valentine's day! 101,398 77
02/11/2007 06:24 PM

The tooth fairy always left me money from a different country. My parents would have me look on the map and they'd show where the country was located. Then we'd go to the library and read books about the other country, and the next day we'd eat a meal specific to that place.

I always thought that was pretty cool, but I was a nerd, even when I was little.

Jepto abismal 58,758 13
02/11/2007 06:43 PM

That rocks Undies! That could quite be the most awesome idea that I've heard! For my daughter's next tooth, she's getting a Philippine peso, a reading of "The Intricate Hazards of Philippine Cuisine" and I'm going to make her eat a duck egg that was hard boiled right before it was ready to hatch, then buried in the backyard for a few weeks to ferment.

Happy Sack of BC Bud 13,792 15
02/11/2007 06:49 PM

Jep that sounds like a recipe for stinky farts.

Jepto abismal 58,758 13
02/11/2007 06:51 PM

Nope. That's bah-glong.