Captain Skippy 41,253 13
06/07/2007 02:18 PM

You seem like a nice person but if you've spent any time around here you know I'm not.


STFU N00B!!!

BlaiseMilla 67,044 13
06/07/2007 02:20 PM

How incredibly creative, Skippy.

Captain Skippy 41,253 13
06/07/2007 02:25 PM

Don't you have anything better to do than stalk me and make snide remarks or is your life just that sad?

Shell Belle 77,143 25
06/07/2007 02:26 PM

Skippy, You seem to me to be a nice person that is trying not to be nice because you don't want people to know that you are nice. It's ok, being nice is not a disease. Try it for a change.

Did that make any sense at all? Didn't think so.

syncope 49,019 14
06/07/2007 02:27 PM

Don't you have anything better to do than stalk me and make snide remarks or is your life just that sad?


Irony, thy name is Skippy.

Dogs Akimbo 211,588 32
06/07/2007 02:30 PM

Peoriagrace is a radical!

Straw 98,005 37
06/07/2007 02:36 PM

How incredibly creative, Skippy.

Yes, picking on Skippy is much more creative.

BlaiseMilla 67,044 13
06/07/2007 02:40 PM

You have a point there.

syncope 49,019 14
06/07/2007 02:40 PM

Hi Straw!

Straw 98,005 37
06/07/2007 02:57 PM

Hi syncope!

peoriagrace 6,166 11
06/08/2007 07:52 AM

So cap'n peanutbutter you've not done any pranks. No need to feel inferior. Just keep reading and I'm sure someone will write one that is up your alley.

peoriagrace 6,166 11
06/08/2007 07:56 AM

well I'm not starting out with the worst stuff.

peoriagrace 6,166 11
06/08/2007 08:02 AM

So we were in bed laying with our backs to each other. Our buttocks were touching. I said let's see how close we can get our butt's together; pull our cheeks apart and then push our holes next to each other.


Then I farted into him. hahaha. That still cracks me up to this day.

The Sage of Seattle 36,465 8
06/08/2007 08:13 AM

Uh huh. Well. It's safe to say now that any drinks I happen to buy for you will have some Beano in them...

Booger Cube 277 9
06/08/2007 10:50 AM

Never in my wildest imaginings have I ever had a visual so violently forced into my head. You farted INTO him, that's either one of the most disturbing things I've ever read, or utterly brilliant. Either way, I'm laughing. Now I can feel it, like a fart on it's way back upstream. Shakespeare.

peoriagrace 6,166 11
06/08/2007 04:48 PM

Sage you chicken.

peoriagrace 6,166 11
06/08/2007 04:49 PM

thanks booger cube.

Mrs. JM 24,693 8
06/08/2007 04:52 PM

Then I farted into him. hahaha. That still cracks me up to this day.

I literally laughed out loud at that. Gab usually makes me giggle to myself, but not a full on "bwahahahaaaha!"
I totally lol'd.

Undies, the Craziest Person in the Universe! 101,398 77
06/08/2007 04:55 PM

Both of you are a disgrace to the glassy-eyed girl.

Mrs. JM 24,693 8
06/08/2007 04:56 PM

ouch

syncope 49,019 14
06/08/2007 04:56 PM

then push our holes next to each other.

That sounds like something I would arbitrarily agree to with a significant other.

Shell Belle 77,143 25
06/08/2007 05:05 PM

There's no way I would let my husband get his hairy, naked ass so close to mine. He emits noxious fumes with the regularity of Old Faithful. You don't even want to be in the same zipcode when he goes off.

Dogs Akimbo 211,588 32
06/08/2007 07:07 PM

Then I farted into him.

I'm not sure whether I'm arousdisgusticated or not.

The Sage of Seattle 36,465 8
06/08/2007 10:51 PM

No, Sage me pig! Me no chicken!

Marmite - 100% Yeast 12,955 12
06/08/2007 10:59 PM

Come on, what did it sound like? How did it feel?

(fapfapfapfapfap)

gobadine 2,737 10
06/08/2007 11:01 PM

So we were in bed laying with our backs to each other. Our buttocks were touching. I said let's see how close we can get our butt's together; pull our cheeks apart and then push our holes next to each other.


Thats one way to pass on thread worm! you do know men are notoriously bad and cleaning all the turd off their hairy arse cracks don't you. Your fart would dislodged weeks worth of crustys that will have produced a blow back into your own rectum as your anus closed after wind release.

ooohh, you won't be doing that again.

The Sage of Seattle 36,465 8
06/08/2007 11:08 PM

Marmite,

Let me see if I can perhaps capture the essence of peoria's story for ya:

"Her fart sounded like the rattling cough of an old chainsaw trying to start one winter's morning; it felt like a warm breeze blowing off of the Sahara Desert. The smell -- nothing at first, then with a sudden intake of breath, a miasma similar to the odor of several dead camels wafts over your senses, almost causing you to black out. You roll onto the floor, trying to escape the noxious fumes, but it is too late."

Marmite - 100% Yeast 12,955 12
06/08/2007 11:11 PM

<action>climaxes.</action>

The Sage of Seattle 36,465 8
06/09/2007 12:17 AM

Twenty dollars please, Marms.

peoriagrace 6,166 11
06/09/2007 04:37 AM

Syncope: of course, you're a guy!

peoriagrace 6,166 11
06/09/2007 04:41 AM

"Both of you are a disgrace to the glassy-eyed girl"


And this from someone named undies?


You're jealousy is sooo sad and pathetic.

peoriagrace 6,166 11
06/09/2007 04:45 AM

Shell: Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

Dogs: You're a dog, so both.

Marm: For him or me?

Gob: I moved to fast for any blow back.

Millie 116,988 28
06/09/2007 04:54 AM

Losty?

The Rockin' Donkey 77,546 17
06/09/2007 07:22 AM

You're jealousy is sooo sad and pathetic

Not nearly as pathetic as your spelling.

The Lovely Daggy 86,705 14
06/09/2007 08:18 AM

A BABOON!

Anh is here. 11,158 14
06/09/2007 08:48 AM

A DRUNK AUSTRALIAN!

peoriagrace 6,166 11
06/09/2007 09:45 PM

Ah good the spelling police: just seeing if you're on your toes.

Who's in charge of punctuation?

Marmite - 100% Yeast 12,955 12
06/09/2007 10:13 PM

I'm.

Sarah Chicka Wow Wow 30,601 8
06/22/2007 08:09 PM

This reminded me of the time me and my then boyfriend were spooning and I farted on him, and he was so grossed out and said I made his penis vibrate by farting right on it.

Hahaha. Awesome.

Undies, the Craziest Person in the Universe! 101,398 77
06/22/2007 08:56 PM

And this from someone named undies?
You're jealousy is sooo sad and pathetic.

What am I supposed to be jealous of again?*




*WARNING: If you say that you have a baby, I might cry.

peoriagrace 6,166 11
06/25/2007 09:57 AM

That you dislike me using glassy eyed girl picture; cause you think I'm too funny in a way you don't like or something.

Bean 8,602 19
06/25/2007 06:30 PM

<action>is not sure whether to mention that she lives about an hour away from Medford, Oregon</action>

Undies, the Craziest Person in the Universe! 101,398 77
06/25/2007 06:42 PM

That you dislike me using glassy eyed girl picture; cause you think I'm too funny in a way you don't like or something.

I dislike every unfunny asshat who uses this icon, including myself on occasion. Bring the funny or Frost off.

Also, teh Haggis sometimes skims threads looking for this icon to read my posts. He might accidentally think you are me. This was only funny back before Trixxie had a personal icon.

Fezig 3,711 7
06/25/2007 06:59 PM

Damn Skippy...do you have to be Frost-ing Emerson all the time? One has to wonder if you are ever a nice person to anyone? Wait there was your cellmate who made you his little playmate but that wouldn't count.

move your feet to the beat of syncope's drum 49,019 14
06/25/2007 07:00 PM

do you have to be Frost-ing Emerson all the time?

I was gonna say you forgot a letter "a" there, but I can't convince myself that you did.

peoriagrace 6,166 11
06/25/2007 07:36 PM

"I dislike every unfunny asshat who uses this icon, including myself on occasion. Bring the funny or cuddle off."

Right, my only reason to be on here is to give humor to the humor impaired.

Personally I don't like to wear asshats; brave of you to admit you do.

Spicey McHaggis 117,784 37
06/25/2007 07:52 PM

Personally I don't like to wear asshats; brave of you to admit you do.

Hey, don't knock it until you've tried it.

move your feet to the beat of syncope's drum 49,019 14
06/25/2007 07:57 PM

Right, my only reason to be on here is to give humor to the humor impaired.


It was very admirable of you to give until you had absolutely none left.

peoriagrace 6,166 11
06/26/2007 04:39 AM

Spicey McHaggis: knock knock.

peoriagrace 6,166 11
06/26/2007 04:43 AM

Syncope; golf clap.

Spicey McHaggis 117,784 37
06/26/2007 04:39 PM

Spicey McHaggis: knock knock.

Who's there?

Chance 171,275 14
06/26/2007 04:43 PM

BANANA!

Undies, the Craziest Person in the Universe! 101,398 77
06/26/2007 04:49 PM

Hey Chance, wanna make out?

syncope 49,019 14
06/26/2007 04:52 PM

Syncope; golf clap.

Thank you very much for giving me the clap!

peoriagrace 6,166 11
06/26/2007 05:50 PM

Who's there?

(said w/bostonian accent)STFU

peoriagrace 6,166 11
06/26/2007 05:51 PM

Syncope: gave you 5 orbs.

Chance- Partying like a rockstar. 171,275 14
06/26/2007 06:51 PM

Hey Chance, wanna make out?

Uh yeah! Do you even have to ask?

Chance- Partying like a rockstar. 171,275 14
06/26/2007 06:54 PM

(said w/bostonian accent)STFU

I'll park my car in your garage sideways, beotch.

(Said with a proper Kentuckian accent)

Undies, the Craziest Person in the Universe! 101,398 77
06/26/2007 10:06 PM

If you're saying STFU to teh Haggis, you better have a sammich or something to stick into his mouth because just telling him doesn't work too well.

Spicey McHaggis 117,784 37
06/26/2007 10:17 PM

A peanut butter sammich works best.

The Sage of Seattle 36,465 8
06/26/2007 10:20 PM

With a side of onions, right?

Undies, the Craziest Person in the Universe! 101,398 77
06/26/2007 10:52 PM

heh. Actually, he HATES onions. Once he almost vomited into my mouth when we were making out after I had eaten onions. ALMOST.

It was still pretty Frost-ing gross though.

peoriagrace 6,166 11
06/26/2007 10:57 PM

Spicy: Peanutbutter sandwich with 3 slices of your fav bread, honey, sliced bananas, and any jelly you like. Will that do?

peoriagrace 6,166 11
06/26/2007 11:00 PM

You take Chance cracker boy.(res speak)

The Sage of Seattle 36,465 8
06/26/2007 11:03 PM

Once he almost vomited into my mouth when we were making out after I had eaten onions.

For some reason, I'm imagining this.

And DON'T mouseover, ya pussies! It's safe for work!

Dixie Princess 583 8
06/26/2007 11:05 PM

And DON'T mouseover, ya pussies! It's safe for work!

you read my mind

Thud 68,506 19
06/26/2007 11:16 PM

you read my mind

Now that he's done that, he'll start to braille you to find the secret message.

Undies, the Craziest Person in the Universe! 101,398 77
06/26/2007 11:19 PM

Spicy: Peanutbutter sandwich with 3 slices of your fav bread, honey, sliced bananas, and any jelly you like. Will that do?

He doesn't like bananas either. He's a picky bastard.

The Sage of Seattle 36,465 8
06/26/2007 11:19 PM

Sorry, bro about your sammich in that other thread.

I gave you five for this one, 'cause I accidentally clickied you four over there.

The Sage of Seattle 36,465 8
06/26/2007 11:20 PM

Uh, Thud.

Thud 68,506 19
06/26/2007 11:20 PM

He's a picky bastard.

So. Tempting.

Fish. Barrel.

Must resist compulsion to make comment.

Undies, the Craziest Person in the Universe! 101,398 77
06/27/2007 02:29 AM

Wait Thud- are you saying he must not be too picky because he married me?

I will cut you, you know.

Thud 68,506 19
06/27/2007 02:48 AM

If you carve me up, can you at least grill up the parts? You might need to cut away some of the fat, but I could send you some recipes if you want.

miss meg, if you please 1,967 0
06/27/2007 04:16 AM

Can I get some? Thud, just eat alot of meat, and we can fatten you up. We could sell you to Chinese resteraunts! You could be a health crisis!

Thud 68,506 19
06/27/2007 04:22 AM

I'm fat enough already, thanks meg.

Millie 116,988 28
06/27/2007 04:24 AM

You aren't fat, you're cuddly!

The Sage of Seattle 36,465 8
06/27/2007 04:24 AM

Dude, it's okay. Your ass just looks fat in those jeans.

Thud 68,506 19
06/27/2007 04:25 AM

<action>blushes</action>
Thank you, Millie.

miss meg, if you please 1,967 0
06/27/2007 04:26 AM

Well, Chinese people can get meat off of cats, so I think they would be the best people to have a human carcass for consumption..



Dearest Thud,
I did not mean to call you fat. I love you. I hope we can be bffs forever!
Luv, Meg

The Sage of Seattle 36,465 8
06/27/2007 04:27 AM

Thud! I was talking to THUD! Sorry, Millie, you know I think you're foxy.

Thud 68,506 19
06/27/2007 04:28 AM

You're sweet, meg. And I know I'm chubby large overweight fat short for my weight, so it doesn't really bug me.

The Sage of Seattle 36,465 8
06/27/2007 04:29 AM

Frost! I'm not slow, just retarded I guess.

Thud 68,506 19
06/27/2007 04:29 AM

You weren't talking to my. I have no ass.

miss meg, if you please 1,967 0
06/27/2007 04:33 AM

haha, my friend's ass has its own name, Don Knotts. It's large and in charge enough to have its own persona.

She's white.

peoriagrace 6,166 11
06/27/2007 08:56 AM

Watch out Miss Meg sometimes the backend personality grows teeth and takes over the front.

peoriagrace 6,166 11
03/26/2009 04:33 AM

I'm bump'n.

Ravos, A-boi-oi-oing! 63,472 21
03/26/2009 07:51 AM

Then he yells; hey my side of the electric blanket is on high. I burst out of the bathroom laughing my ass off; Saying I wondered how long it would take you to figure it out.

Pretty much every time I'm in my friend's car, he turns on the seat warmer just to piss me off. Even if it is like 40C outside.

Lobster with Battery Acid Sauce 18,568 33
03/26/2009 03:37 PM

40C? What is that? A chubby girl with moderate sized boobies bra size?

Ghost Lobstah: BOO! 18,568 33
10/16/2009 03:23 PM

boobies!!!!

Pants 14,252 17
10/16/2009 04:59 PM

40C? What is that? A chubby girl with moderate sized boobies bra size?


Yeah, it's partly cloudy with an 80% chance of lactose.

Amityville Ravos 63,472 21
10/19/2009 09:13 AM

We don't do farenheit here in Canada. The C is for Celsius.

Drewcifer aka Captain Nyquil 46,324 58
11/25/2010 11:20 PM

BUMP'd

Because:

So we were in bed laying with our backs to each other. Our buttocks were touching. I said let's see how close we can get our butt's together; pull our cheeks apart and then push our holes next to each other.


Then I farted into him. hahaha. That still cracks me up to this day.

is the funniest thing I have yet to read here...

Awesomesauce (did I do it correctly?)