My job is MORE stable than Charles Manson
A comedy conversation
by Smokatronic  2,388  9
06/29/2007 04:17 PM 229 views
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So life just started looking up for me all of a sudden a couple of weeks ago. It was a Tuesday and like any other Tuesday, I was taking a nap at my desk. I had a letter from the VP of my company saying that I was supposed to be fired the day before because I still hadn't got my security clearance back, but like that guy in Office Space, I came to work anyway.
I see my boss and ask him if I could have another extension and he says, "no, there won't be any other extensions... because you got your clearance back!"
I go to the phone to tell my wife the good news and she says that she just opened a letter and there's a check in it for me for $200 from a title agency that owed me. Next mail is from the Veterans Administration stating that I am 50% disabled and will receive $867 per month, tax free, for life. I went home early before the sky fell on me in some cruel cosmic joke. When I woke up the next morning, there was $5,200 dropped into my bank acct from the VA for 6 months back pay. Plus my lush wife hasn't drank in 3 months and got a job at a deli.
So, considering I was about to lose my job, house, and wife a month ago...
Anyway, thanks for providing teh funny during some troubled times, I don't post much, but I am always watching you. Even in the shower,
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Like This? Rate It!
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Hilarious
9 votes
4.5
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Hilarious
4 votes
4.0
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Smokey Muskrat 41,132  13
06/29/2007 04:19 PM
Hate to tell you, but I've got the AIDS.
You should get tested, too, after all the unprotected butt sex I paid you for.
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Hilarious
8 votes
4.6
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John Hargrave 67,044 13
06/29/2007 04:19 PM
Great windfall. Can I interest you in a copy of Prank the Monkey and some coffee mugs?
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Funny
4 votes
3.5
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BlaiseMilla 67,044 13
06/29/2007 04:20 PM
You know Gork means he paid to be the catcher.
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Hilarious
5 votes
4.0
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syncope 49,019 14
06/29/2007 04:21 PM
This is just the sort of story that ends with you getting hit by a bus on your way to the bank.
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Funny
4 votes
3.7
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Smokatronic 2,388 9
06/29/2007 04:22 PM
Why yes. I've been meaning to pick up a copy.
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Hilarious
6 votes
4.3
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Chit 178,781 15
06/29/2007 04:25 PM
Congratulations before Skippy comes and wizzes all over your parade!
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Funny
5 votes
3.6
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Chit 178,781 15
06/29/2007 04:28 PM
Why yes. I've been meaning to pick up a copy.
"A fool and his money..."
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Hilarious
3 votes
4.0
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Shell Belle 77,143 25
06/29/2007 04:32 PM
Hi Smokatronic. Glad things are going well for you.
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Hilarious
6 votes
4.3
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Robin® 14,626 10
06/29/2007 04:49 PM
Not going to start a thread for this:
Our office is shutting down as of Dec. 31, we're all being laid off. This week they sent one of the big wigs to take a look at the Shakespeare we have to file and send to Ga. The lady they sent used to work in this office before I started. She is a rather short square woman with the broad upper body of a weight lifter, when I asked about her physique I was informed that she was a former Houston energy player Number 71, there in the front. There are no better pictures because people don't care about women's football.
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0 votes
0.0
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Smokatronic 2,388 9
06/29/2007 04:58 PM
"A fool and his money..."
John,
I went with the Cadillac signed copy.
-Michael
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Hilarious
4 votes
4.0
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TheFoye 55,700 16
06/29/2007 07:47 PM
Congratulations, can I borrow tree fitty?
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Chuckleworthy
4 votes
2.0
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Phuc 237,919 21
06/29/2007 07:53 PM
Can your wife get me a discount on pastrami?
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Hilarious
6 votes
4.2
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Miss. All White Meat Trixxie 65,026 15
06/29/2007 08:12 PM
Plutonium is more stable than Charles Mansion.
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