Dogs Akimbo 211,588 32
07/03/2007 04:16 PM

You may be having problems with your prostate gland.

Soros 33 5
07/03/2007 04:17 PM

Great, I took my cat to be neutered. Oh, and By the way, cat urine stinks.

Phuc 237,919 21
07/03/2007 04:23 PM

Other than finally coming to the realization that everyone on GAB is a racist, I'm doing OK. I took two dumps today so the works are relatively clog-free.

Stone Cold Bikiniasaurus 62,262 18
07/03/2007 04:33 PM

Other than finally coming to the realization that everyone on GAB is a racist


You're a lot slower than I thought, Al.

Smokey Muskrat 41,132 13
07/03/2007 04:40 PM

Last two times I've had that dream I didn't wake up.

In one of the cases, my then 5 year old had crawled into the bed and got reasonably pissed at me. She tried to out me to my mother as I was dropping her off on my way to work, but I turned the tables on the little brat and said, "No, you peed, dear. It's ok. You'll grow out of it."

Stone Cold Bikiniasaurus 62,262 18
07/03/2007 04:41 PM

"No, you peed, dear. It's ok. You'll grow out of it."


She must be dreading her future then, because you obviously didn't.

Chit 178,781 15
07/03/2007 04:47 PM

In high school I had two buddies that were Irish and brothers, that shared a bedroom.

One night after drinking fairly heavily, Eric woke up to his brother Vince standing right by his bedside and giving him a golden shower.

Vince claimed he had no recolection, even after the beating!

Captain Skippy 41,253 13
07/03/2007 04:51 PM

You're a lot slower than I thought, Al.

He excels gastrointestinally.

Captain Skippy 41,253 13
07/03/2007 04:52 PM

My brother had a friend's computer sitting on the floor in his room when you walk in the door. One night his drunk roommate turned left instead of right and walked into his room, saw the white shape in the dark and proceeded to pee at it.

Phuc 237,919 21
07/03/2007 04:52 PM

You're a lot slower than I thought, Al.

I've been on this board for ten years. How could you possibly believe I have an IQ over 35?

Stone Cold Bikiniasaurus 62,262 18
07/03/2007 04:54 PM

I've been on this board for ten years. How could you possibly believe I have an IQ over 35?


Touche, chinaman. Touche.

Taco McSocialista 61,976 36
07/03/2007 04:54 PM

My friend Sean went to the Citadel and has some great drunk stories.

On one occasion him and his buddies went out drinking at a big party. Sean got unbelievably wasted and proceeded to pee on some chick he though was a toilet.

The moral of the story, in his words, "well, if you're a chick that looks like a toilet, you might get peed on."

Phuc 237,919 21
07/03/2007 05:06 PM

Touche, chinaman. Touche.

No, you touche. You're the one with the not-so-fresh cootie pie.

Once a Zolton, Always a Zolton 88,205 34
07/03/2007 05:15 PM

I had a dream once that I was eating an enormous marshmallow. And when I woke up, I found I'd shat all over the bed.

Marshmallows always give me the runs.

</so not proud of myself>

D-vizzl 56 7
07/06/2007 01:10 AM

When my boyfriend was at college he forgot to walk his door one night and awoke to some shadowy drunken stranger pee-peeing into his standing a/c unit. Upon evacuating his bladder said stranger than simply turned around and evacuated the room.

(Not so much funny as part of the reason I'm so anal-retentive about keeping my doors locked at all times. *dart-y paranoia eyes*)

buttcold 268 5
07/06/2007 04:58 AM

forgot to walk his door

And the door piddle on the carpet?

marP 80,728 42
07/06/2007 07:35 AM

I had a dream where I had to pee like, every 5 minutes

I do have to pee every five minutes. You insensitive bitch!