SHP: don't take this personally, but I hate you. 181,795 70
07/27/2007 09:43 PM

I'm fat, so be specific. Of a heart attack, or from starvation?

The Rockin' Donkey [\m<>m/] 77,546 17
07/27/2007 09:45 PM

Whichever comes first

TheFoye 55,700 16
07/27/2007 09:48 PM

What's wrong Donk, Janeys got a gun?


Buh dum pshh

Captain Skippy 41,253 13
07/27/2007 09:49 PM

I don't smoke, I drink in moderation, I eat healthy and I get a decent amount of exercise.

I'd say I'm going to die on the way home tonight.

gobadine 2,737 10
07/27/2007 09:50 PM

I'm always worrying about having a heart attack or brain tumour so when I go I hope its something exotic like elephantitus.

Chit 178,781 15
07/27/2007 09:50 PM

Some time after the oceans swallow up all the world's land masses.


So at least another year or two.

Chit 178,781 15
07/27/2007 09:52 PM

Biggest cause of heart attack or brain tumors...




Excessive worrying!

gobadine 2,737 10
07/27/2007 10:09 PM

thanks, that really will stop me worrying.

although my balls are getting itchy.

Sunny & Capricious Bikini 62,262 18
07/27/2007 10:13 PM

That depends. How much longer do you think Nachos can hold off his murderous impulses before he goes on a killing spree?

Robin® 14,626 10
07/27/2007 10:15 PM

I would like to die of old age, peacefully in my sleep, but I doubt I'll get there.

More likely I will die in some freak accident involving swords and too much Mead at the reanissance festival.

HeBombedDamnIt 333 6
07/27/2007 10:19 PM

as well, I would like to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandpa did. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

The Rockin' Donkey [\m<>m/] 77,546 17
07/27/2007 11:07 PM

Why would you have notebook paper at a renaissance festival?

Neophyte 9,956 11
07/27/2007 11:08 PM

...you're supposed to put the joke in quotes and credit the author
when you blatantly rip off another person's material like that.
I'll do it for you this time.

The pevious joke brought to you by Greg Dean

Neophyte 9,956 11
07/27/2007 11:08 PM

...not you Donk.

Robin® 14,626 10
07/27/2007 11:19 PM

Mead, I think skewered by an old lady drunk on the chaucers Shakespearety "mead" ridong a rascal trying to joust would make good head lines.

Or maybe I should just be the old lady and get gunned down by police.

syncope 49,019 14
07/27/2007 11:45 PM

Right...

about...

N-

HeBombedDamnIt 333 6
07/28/2007 12:19 AM

"The pevious joke brought to you by Greg Dean"

--Neophyte

178,000 hits, and no mention of Greg Dean or pevious jokes... Why has Google failed me again.

Neophyte 9,956 11
07/28/2007 12:24 AM

Exactly how many of his books have you read?
me=1, the one that joke is in.

HeBombedDamnIt 333 6
07/28/2007 12:39 AM

<action> puts $0.02 check in the mail for Greg Dean</action>

Neophyte=1
HeBombedDamnIt=0.02

Thank you Boob Lady! 57,521 23
07/28/2007 01:20 AM

That depends. How much longer do you think Nachos can hold off his murderous impulses before he goes on a killing spree?

That depends.

When are we supposed to be seeing each other again?

Chit 178,781 15
07/28/2007 05:04 AM

"How long do you think it will be before you die?"


I'm all for having a positive attitude and all

but I think it actually stopped growing years ago.

Big Boobs Mcgee 6,369 10
07/28/2007 05:08 AM

I'll be dead pretty soon if I don't get laid.

Probably death by dildo.

Cinderblock 27,578 25
07/28/2007 02:20 PM

I'm fit, eat well, I don't drink, smoke, or sunbathe. I have no family history of heart disease, stroke, diabetes, or any other major disease.

... but the other day I poked my brother and he said, "Never underestimate the power of an army ranger with post-traumatic stress disorder."

Maybe until the end of the summer.

Thank you Boob Lady! 57,521 23
07/28/2007 02:46 PM

I drink, smoke, eat copious amounts of meat and my general disposition is definitely heart attack-worthy.

I'll probably outlive you all.

Teh High Priestess, I can DANCE! 58,948 29
07/28/2007 02:57 PM

Well since I'm cutting down the road and not across the street, it should take about 30 seconds to bleed out.

Virnomine 79,386 11
07/28/2007 03:04 PM

Well at least something good came out of this thread.

Dogs Akimbo 211,588 32
07/28/2007 03:55 PM

I think that Virn has already killed High Priestess and is wearing her skin.

My proof? Every single word in that last post was spelled correctly.

Dun Dun!

Virnomine 79,386 11
07/28/2007 04:31 PM

That's just silly, it takes about 4 days to properly tan human skin, I couldn't possibly be wearing my new leather codpiece yet.

Free Prostate Exams at the Rabble Clinic 264 7
07/28/2007 04:55 PM

Monday, April 13, 2065.

The Rockin' Donkey [\m<>m/] 77,546 17
07/28/2007 06:33 PM

Tuesday, February 3, 2037

Virnomine 79,386 11
07/29/2007 02:21 AM

What kind of sticks use that site? It only goes up to 350!

Millie 116,988 28
07/29/2007 02:24 AM

Last time someone posted that site I found out that I was going to die April, 2007.

Virnomine 79,386 11
07/29/2007 02:52 AM

Hell, you're living on borrowed time then, max out those credit cards and burn as many bridges as you can. Both literally and metaphorically. Have a blast!

Millie 116,988 28
07/29/2007 05:59 AM

Pfft. That's the way I live my life anyway.

KChikita and her large Sweet Potato! 128,339 98
07/29/2007 01:22 PM

Friday, Sept 17, 2060.

Seems I'm going to be here a while.

Dr. Hollis 7,284 14
07/29/2007 05:20 PM

December 21st, 2012.

We're all kicking it that day.