Spicey McHaggis 117,784 37
09/17/2007 04:25 PM

Pics or it didn't happen.

Neophyte 9,956 11
09/17/2007 04:25 PM

Useless without pictures.

dropkick brody 43,090 12
09/17/2007 04:26 PM

Useless without pic..

Ah, Frost it. That sucks.

The Mailman: ringing twice, as always 176,454 56
09/17/2007 04:26 PM

4th variation of the same post!

Schrodinger 35 5
09/17/2007 04:26 PM

Call him a poo-poo head?

Or, systematically seek out and destroy everything he knows and loves. It's a matter of taste, really.

dropkick brody 43,090 12
09/17/2007 04:27 PM

You could spread a rumour that he's in fact, goatse man.

Neophyte 9,956 11
09/17/2007 04:33 PM

You could use some of his pictures to start an e-dating profile on
"dudehookups.com" or "gentlemans_reacharound.nz" or similar.

Then start giving out his phone numbers to anyone who asks.

Straw 98,005 37
09/17/2007 04:34 PM

Unless Dave has a vagina, the pics are clearly not of him, so what the hell is the point of showing them to everyone? Ken isn't hurting Dave with this vindictive little display, he's hurting the person with the vagina.

I don't know what you can do, Taco, but it would be neat if it resulted in him never seeing vagina again.

Taco: Oracle at the right hand of HP 61,976 36
09/17/2007 04:39 PM

My friend who told me's words of consolation: "If it makes you feel any better, you have a really nice vagina!"

McLovin' 19,555 11
09/17/2007 04:39 PM

"Nice"? Mittens are "nice"!

Neophyte 9,956 11
09/17/2007 04:55 PM

Vaginas are nicer than mittens.
Always.





....unless you're trying to keep your hands from freezing, then still vagina.

Sunny and Capricious Bikini 62,262 18
09/17/2007 04:59 PM

I'm reminded of a video sent to me by a friend of a friend on a drunken night out. Let me just tell you this, Taco, you're lucky it isn't a video clip involving hot girl-on-girl action and double-ended dildos. Everyone else is probably unlucky for the exact same reason, but whatever. Boys (and girls, apparently) can't be trusted with delicate, sexual material.



Also, that video: only good thing to come out of my friendship with Nachos. It was hot.

Thank you Boob Lady! 57,521 23
09/17/2007 05:01 PM

Don't make it sound as though you've deleted it from your phone.

Space Admiral BobJohnson 178,045 22
09/17/2007 05:02 PM

You should probably work very hard to become a famous, wealthy porn star. Claim it's the life you always wanted. Then you can thank "Ken" for getting you started and he'll feel like an idiot for helping you instead of hurting you.

Sunny and Capricious Bikini 62,262 18
09/17/2007 05:04 PM

Don't make it sound as though you've deleted it from your phone.


What?? I did!







Right after I saved it to my computer.

Neophyte 9,956 11
09/17/2007 05:09 PM

It saddens me to realize that my participation in this thread represents
the closest thing I will ever be able to categorize as:
'interaction with Taco's noony'.

Chance 171,275 14
09/17/2007 05:11 PM

Just be glad that it wasnt "Dave from Gab" or instead of pictures he would have cut out your vagina and made a jello mold for all his friends to eat out of.

MrGlass 25,340 11
09/17/2007 05:34 PM

Posessing numerous (and graphic) pictures of Gabbers, I know exactly how horrible this can be. Don't lose heart though, in a few years nobody will remember except for me, because I keep a dedicated folder of this Shakespeare on my desktop. Gross!

Chance 171,275 14
09/17/2007 05:36 PM

MR. GLASS!!!!!

Yo dawg, how it be hangin'?

Captain Skippy 41,253 13
09/17/2007 05:44 PM

Taco, to answer your question, introduce him to roofies and trixxie but not in that order. Also, have a camcorder ready.

MrGlass 25,340 11
09/17/2007 05:45 PM

Sorry I havn't been posting in... a year. I got really busy becoming a scientist and filming small children without their knowledge for money. Yes, life is absolutely as glorious as Bill Nye made it out to be.

I'm a mother-Frostin' S.C.I.E.N.T.I.S.T.!

dropkick brody 43,090 12
09/17/2007 05:54 PM

Sorry I havn't been posting in... a year. I got really busy becoming a scientist and filming small children without their knowledge for money

"Scientist" eh?

Neophyte 9,956 11
09/17/2007 05:56 PM

Yeah he's a Pedofaptologist.

Dave's not here 52,827 16
09/17/2007 06:15 PM

Just be glad that it wasnt "Dave from Gab" or instead of pictures he would have cut out your vagina and made a jello mold for all his friends to eat out of.

Right, like I'd share.

Taco, sometimes the simplest solutions are best. Sure you could come up with some clever an elaborate revenge scheme, but in a case like this just finding someone to toss him against a wall and punch him in the kidneys until he pisses blood for a week has an old school simplicity that's hard to top.

MrGlass 25,340 11
09/17/2007 06:17 PM

But seriously, if you need any help with pranking, I'm in. They'll never find me... in CANADA. Muahaha! Legal black hole!

Dave's not here 52,827 16
09/17/2007 06:38 PM

Here's a little food for thought though.

There are a lot of fun and easy ways to really make someone's life hell, however if you actually want to launch that kind of harassment campaign you've already blown it, because you posted on it here. Especially in the modern world of lawsuits and stalking laws you never, ever tell anyone that you intend on seeking revenge unless you can't do without their help and you trust them absolutely.

That being said, here are a few old classics.

First of all, the single best piece of information you can get on someone is probably their SS#. If you happened to have that, which in this case I doubt but if he were say an old boyfriend you could grab it from a pay stub or other document. I always like filing a few extra tax returns addendum's for them, amended returns declaring supplemental income, etc. This leads first to a bill, then to a dispute, then often to an audit. I particularly like claiming large charitable donations and providing fake receipt photocopies. Obvious fakes, but not too obvious.

That works best on people who actually have an income of course. If he's a starving college student it isn't as effective.

Sending letters to multiple branches of each armed services devision recruitment office in his name expressing interest is good. Those people call constantly. Also making donation promises to charities like the fraternal order of police.

Dave's not here 52,827 16
09/17/2007 06:39 PM

KKK bumper stickers are a low risk low effort option. Slap one on his bumper and see what happens.

Fliers with those little tags you tear off with the phone number are endless fun. Put them up offering all kinds of crap. I like to claim to be angry wife selling all her cheating husbands expensive Shakespeare off for next to nothing while he's away on business. Doesn't matter, anything that will keep his phone ringing around the clock.

If your local paper has free announcements or bills top the phone number then announcing an early bird tag or estate sales as his place is good. Key phrases are Lots of Antiques and please knock. Helps to go out early and hang a few signs.

Harder core and more illegal. Paste him into a printout from a sex offender DB registry and print up a few signs to hang around his neighborhood or around local schools. Keep in mind that you really don't want to be caught.

That's just a few ideas that I in no way suggest actually doing.

The Mailman: ringing twice, as always 176,454 56
09/17/2007 06:49 PM

Note to self: Never. Make. Dave. Angry.

dropkick brody 43,090 12
09/17/2007 06:56 PM

I found this great revenge blog the other day. (scroll to the bottom post)

Basically, one guy sold a laptop on eBay that didn't work. He refused to repay the money and said he didn't know that it was broken beforehand.

The guy who now owns the broken laptop realised that the seller didn't erase the hardrive. That equalled revenge opportunities aplenty.

Chickens VonGoatherd 286,556 61
09/17/2007 07:08 PM

Pick up a mail forward slip at the Post Office and send all his mail to Egypt.

Or spread a IM conversation you make up with him confessing his love and lust for Dave.

Phuc 237,919 21
09/17/2007 07:11 PM

Kick him in the ding ding.

Dave's not here 52,827 16
09/17/2007 07:57 PM

I forgot an easy classic. Find a really good smutty magazine, something like tansvestite scat whores quarterly. Set him up with a subscription in his name but "mistakenly" have the address go to the house next to his, or his parents, etc.

This also works with hate group mailing lists, the GLS, whatever is apropriate.

dropkick brody 43,090 12
09/17/2007 08:13 PM

tansvestite?

Thank you Boob Lady! 57,521 23
09/17/2007 08:22 PM

Mutilated family pets hanging from his front porch always makes for a priceless photo opportunity.

Thank you Boob Lady! 57,521 23
09/17/2007 08:23 PM

Bonus points if you do it during the holiday season and rig a wire so they all spasm to the tune of 'Silent Night'.