Pranks
A comedy article
by PrincessLea  77  5
01/05/2008 10:54 AM 1019 views
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 During my senior year of high school, a couple of friends and I were at a surplus store in the Twin Cities called Ax Man. They sell random surplus stuff, like electrical wire and small corked glass bottles, wooden dowels, odd stuff.
We went looking to see if there was anything there we could be creative with as far as handicrafts. Troublemaking was not on our mind. Until we saw them: several rolls of yellow police tape, with various phrases like "POLICE LINE DO NOT CROSS," "CAUTION," and such.
They say great minds think alike -- we all went for the "POLICE LINE DO NOT CROSS" tape at once. The gears were definitely turning as to what we could do with this. Then my friend Connie suggested, "Why not use this for a Senior prank?"
We bought the rolls. Then we met back at my house to discuss what we were going to do. After about an hour, we decided to "tape off" all the entrances to the school (there were about five that students used daily, and five more that only the staff use).
At first, we didn't know how we were going to pull it off. The parking lot is patrolled regularly, because the high school shares property with the local tech school's landscaping campus. Their parking lots are kind of secluded in a wooded area across from the high school, and it was a popular makeout spot at night for kids, so cops were always driving through. There was no way we could park a car there in the student lot and not look suspicious.
However, one of the local parks had a trail that led past the school property, because the school is next to a river. We could go in through the back way, but that was still risky. Even though we didn't live in a dangerous area, four teenagers (two being girls) walking alone in a dark, woody area near a river? Perfect setup for a horror movie.
Anyhow, we figured there was no other way, so the following Tuesday (our last day as Seniors), we parked our friend's car at the park down the road at about 11:30 p.m., and walked the freaky path through the woods. We got to the school just fine though, and started taping off all the doors we could find. We even taped the auto shop class garage doors! We had to duck behind bushes twice, because the patrol car swept through the front parking lot right as we were tying up the main entrances.
About an hour after we started, we finished our taping, and headed back to the car, the remaining rolls in hand. We drove back to our respective homes, awaiting what would ensue the next morning.
The next morning, I picked up my friends in my car, and we headed to school, excited and a bit nervous. Would they have just taken the tape off? Would someone know it was us? We got there to find not only the cops, but the fire department, two ambulances, and a growing crowd of students, parents, teachers/staff and onlookers who saw the commotion from the main road.
Innocently, we asked what was going on. We were told that they don't know, but there was tape around the doors when some of the staff arrived this morning, and now the authorities were doing a search. They were confused because there was no crime to warrant a tape off, yet the school was taped off.
Because of the size of the school (accommodates 2600 students and 150 staff at one time), it took the authorities about an hour and a half to confirm that there was no threat and classes could go on that day. No one ever found out who did it, even though they offered a reward for our capture.
I still had one leftover roll of tape. So I did the sensible thing: I passed it onto our fearless leader, Sir John Hargrave.
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Like This? Rate It!
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Hilarious
16 votes
4.2
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0 votes
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John Hargrave 128,751  73
01/05/2008 10:58 AM
I will confirm that I am in receipt of the police tape.
REPEAT: I HAVE THE POLICE TAPE.
Looking for suggestions on funny things to do with it. I have nearly half a roll (estimated 100 feet).
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Dogs Akimbo 211,590 32
01/05/2008 12:07 PM
I'd put it around the server.
Can't hurt.
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Click and create your Zwailman! 176,459 56
01/05/2008 12:56 PM
Find a way to be on the sidelines during the next Superbowl and stand near the goal line. When one team gets a "1st and goal" play, quickly run down the field, laying the tape right ON the goal line. Then ask the quarterback for a urine sample.
Note: people watching the game on TV probably won't be able to read the text on the tape, but that's not the kind of detail that will stop you, right?
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marks98 29 0
01/05/2008 01:33 PM
You should put it around your Coleridge when you go to bed and if it's broken the next morning it means you got an erection during the night
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Hammerhead 59,399 14
01/05/2008 01:57 PM
John, are you persona non grata at your ex-employer's office, or would you be allowed in the building?
Take a doorframe sized piece of cardboard, tape a bunch of the police line on it, fold it in half, and as stealthily as possible, walk to your former boss' office and tape the cardboard to the door.
Bonus points if your former boss is in the office at the time and you can make it difficult for anyone to enter/exit/remove it.
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marks98 29 0
01/05/2008 02:12 PM
john don't mind hammerhead he's nf
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Slinky 28,185 10
01/05/2008 02:35 PM
If you're referring to Hammerhead as not being funny on what grounds do you speak?
And where is your funny you can contribute to anyone in the world except for your own bathroom mirror because you look down and see your own penis and even you, the owner of said penis, have to laugh at it because it really is that small.
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killadelphia, pistolvania 65 5
01/05/2008 03:00 PM
dress in the standard black and white prison stripes and sit on a sidewalk at a popular itersection sorrounded by the tape. make angry faces at passerby.
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All Joe Phlanx wants for Christmas is Teh Funny 1,919 8
01/05/2008 03:03 PM
Why is the time stamp on the main page showing October, but the actual article showing January? Put the tape around that.
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Hammerhead 59,399 14
01/05/2008 03:03 PM
I'd make an action tag showing that I would give marks98 the finger, but they don't work in articles, so I won't.
I will however state that I'm seriously confused at the last post he made, and I'm really wondering if there was some kind of translator for Assbag-ese that someone could point me towards so I could better understand this fine contributor to our community properly.
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JakAus 310 6
01/05/2008 11:42 PM
ass-baggery. Is that one of those secret oriental arts where they fuse your nuts and your balls together. I mean they do have acupuncture, wouldn't put it past 'em.
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Dogs Akimbo 211,590 32
01/06/2008 12:06 AM
So, in Australia, the nuts and the balls are different things?
You guys have been Frost-ing those koalas, haven't you?
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AuburnJT 211 5
01/06/2008 01:40 AM
Fake a B-List celebrity's death. I want to read about it on the news too.
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AuburnJT 211 5
01/06/2008 01:42 AM
Extra points if the celebrity who's death is being faked is not involved in the prank.
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Golden Words 977 9
01/06/2008 02:40 AM
Valentines is coming closer, its time for a perfect gift for your wife, your death.
Here's what you do, a chalk outline, a police tape, and little blood from the neighbors dog.
Leave the rest to your wifes immagination.
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peoriagrace 6,166 11
01/06/2008 02:30 PM
Use in a two bathroom stall in a very popular mall or store. Tape up one stall with appoxy and police tape. Then place some bloody covered pants and shirt in the next stall over. You can also add some organ meat to the toilet.
Wash your hands or use urinal so as to watch and take pictures.
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Sparky Buzzsaw 21 5
01/08/2008 11:02 PM
I'm going to suggest using it on a police station, though the whole "jail time" thing might be a bit of a downer.
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marks98 29 0
01/09/2008 08:07 AM
'd make an action tag showing that I would give marks98 the finger, but they don't work in articles, so I won't.
I will however state that I'm seriously confused at the last post he made, and I'm really wondering if there was some kind of translator for Assbag-ese that someone could point me towards so I could better understand this fine contributor to our community properly.
see this is that I was talking about, nf.
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marks98 29 0
01/09/2008 08:08 AM
also I'm well aware bbcode doesn't work here but I used it anyway what of it
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Bean 8,602 19
01/09/2008 08:48 AM
If you have any bitter enemies, go get some of those orange pilons (not cones) you'd see in a construction zone. When your rival leaves his/her car (preferrably in a busy parking lot, place the pilons around the car and string the tape around the pilons.
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Hammerhead 59,399 14
01/09/2008 11:39 AM
Oh, yes, Froststick. You've shown me the way. Your random comments, use of idiotic unusable code, and your oh so magnificent understanding of "teh funneh" have made me re-think my whole existence here on GAB.
Oh, wise and spectacular marks98, how can I ever live up to your standards of the funny? Your chronic rectal-cranial inversion screams out to the masses of your true character.
In other words, feel free to go play hide and go Frost yourself, you Shakespeare-for-brains Coleridgegobbling cumdumpster. You wouldn't know what was funny if funny came up behind you and beat you over the head with a clown.
And your contributions to the funny here have been just massive with your broken record like comments about me being unfunny.
Are you allowed out in public without your helmet and a handler?
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TacoCrunch: Making 2008 epic since 2008 61,976 36
01/09/2008 12:26 PM
1. Tape off random cars in a large parking lot, like outside an arena or a Wal Mart even.
2. Find your nearest news station and tape off something near the building. A nearby bench or bus stall. Look official. Go home and watch for it on the news.
3. If your super ballsy, abandon a bag in an airport bathroom and tape the area off. This will most certainly send you to jail if you're caught, and will probably make at least regional news.
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marks98 29 0
01/10/2008 06:35 AM
Hammerhead you're less funny than the holocaust and the holocaust wasn't very funny at all. nope not one bit.
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The High Priestess of St. Charles Ave. 58,948 29
01/10/2008 06:38 AM
I don't know, mark. That burning Jew joke set off a riot at the Apollo. A laugh riot. So I'd have to say HH is pretty damn funny.
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