Chi Chi Felipe 161,287 14
02/21/2008 08:36 PM

Al once bought a Mac for the sole purpose of wiping his ass with it. It was too bulky, so he beat up Steve Jobs and made him invent the MacBook Air.

Phuc 237,453 20
02/21/2008 08:36 PM

Awesome.

Miss, Throw me sumtin Mr. Trixxie 65,014 14
02/21/2008 08:40 PM

One time, Chi Chi's nose got so brown from tossing Al's salad, something, something, something.

BillSalamie 66,795 11
02/21/2008 08:46 PM

Al gave me five orbs, just for the Frost of it.

Chi Chi Felipe 161,287 14
02/21/2008 08:50 PM

Trixxie, don't ruin this thread the way you're trying to ruin the sanctity of marriage.

Chickens is a Cowardly Harpoonist 282,028 58
02/21/2008 08:56 PM

The original ending of the We Are The World video had to be cut cause everyone got bummed from the sheer hate pouring off Al made Bono cry.

The Mailman, as portrayed by Jacques Tati 174,473 52
02/21/2008 09:11 PM

Each time Al eats foie gras, an angel gets his wings.

The Mailman, as portrayed by Jacques Tati 174,473 52
02/21/2008 09:12 PM

Whenever a chicken realizes that it is only destined to be served as McNuggets, it prays for its feet to be delivered to Al.

Phuc 237,453 20
02/21/2008 09:21 PM

Ah so!

dropkick brody 43,075 12
02/21/2008 09:28 PM

If you request a special order in a restaurant, Al will appear and make you eat a hot steaming bowl of dick instead.

That's What She Said 26,017 24
02/21/2008 09:29 PM

Al likes his meat like he likes his baboon ass..

...on a plate.

Ravos, the Dreaded Gabberwocky 62,361 20
02/21/2008 09:30 PM

If you order sweet & sour chicken bals, Al will personally piss in your coke.

Whistler P. McManus 183,262 42
02/21/2008 09:56 PM

Al shot Janet Reno just to watch him die.

Tofu Pudden' 10,950 9
02/21/2008 10:04 PM

Al can reset small electronics using only his penis.




</asian stereotype>

The Mailman, as portrayed by Jacques Tati 174,473 52
02/21/2008 10:07 PM

Al can ban you from ZUG.com.

Dogs Akimbo 205,285 31
02/21/2008 10:13 PM

Whenever Chuck Norris thinks about Al, he says to himself, How come he never calls?

syncope 49,000 13
02/21/2008 10:36 PM

We were winning when Al left Vietnam.

Phuc 237,453 20
02/21/2008 11:45 PM

Diddy mao, kids.

Diddy. Mao.

Chickens is a Cowardly Harpoonist 282,028 58
02/21/2008 11:49 PM

If Al says WWII isn't over, WWII ISN'T OVER.

Dave's not here, but his mojo is workin 52,810 16
02/22/2008 12:08 AM

Al once kicked a man so hard his pancreas flew out his ass.

Al then wrapped it in bacon and grilled it.

Chi Chi Felipe 161,287 14
02/22/2008 12:12 AM

Al's first name used to be seventy-five letters long. But since only 2 existed in the alphabet, the other 73 were dropped.

Space Admiral BobJohnson 177,873 22
02/22/2008 12:23 AM

The Endangered Species Act wasn't necessary until Al was born.

Space Admiral BobJohnson 177,873 22
02/22/2008 12:44 AM

A woman's G-spot is everywhere when Al is with her.

Fratberry 277,318 52
02/22/2008 12:51 AM

Al once sang "Material Girl" in front of a crowd of strangers.

Fratberry 277,318 52
02/22/2008 12:52 AM

No, seriously.

dropkick brody 43,075 12
02/22/2008 12:52 AM

..and looked better in the pink silk dress than Madonna did?

Chickens is a Cowardly Harpoonist 282,028 58
02/22/2008 01:13 AM

No one has ever questioned Al's wardrobe and lived.

Pram 78,171 40
02/22/2008 01:14 AM

Al doesn't just play guitar. He has six-string vocal chords.

Oooh, are they in drop-D tuning? I think I could gurn-sync to his vocal shred.

Fratberry 277,318 52
02/22/2008 01:27 AM

Al once ate an entire pig. From the inside out.

Straw 95,470 36
02/22/2008 01:29 AM

Douglas Adams was thinking of Al when he wrote the restaurant scene where the cows come to your table and suggest the best parts of their anatomy for eating.

manhole 20,243 26
02/22/2008 01:38 AM

Al drew my icon. If feel special.

Bankey 70,843 10
02/22/2008 01:41 AM

The 'Turducken' was a concept lifted directly from Al's signature dish:

The "Mast-almat-ahua"

Which of course consists of a Bull Mastiff stuffed with a Dalmatian stuffed with a chihuahua.

The Mailman, as portrayed by Jacques Tati 174,473 52
02/22/2008 01:42 AM

Al owns a domain name that can mentally submit you to Tubgirl and Goatse, all in one swift glance.

Chickens is a Cowardly Harpoonist 282,028 58
02/22/2008 01:49 AM

manhole 2/22/2008 12:38 am

Al drew my icon. If feel special.



Yeah, well Al choked my chicken. Beat that.

JakAus 310 6
02/22/2008 02:09 AM

Whenever Al masturbates, woman in the South Pacific are impregnated.

Chance 171,220 14
02/22/2008 03:02 AM

Chuck Norris wears Al Nataganagaganarangha pajamas.

Pram 78,171 40
02/22/2008 03:06 AM

Al has so much power, that when Al Jorgensen is in town, he makes him change his name to Al #2.

Ravos, The Dreaded Gabberwocky 62,361 20
02/22/2008 03:10 AM

When pop-eye needs a pick-me-up, he eats spinach.

When Al needs a pick-me-up, he eats pop-eye

Phuc 237,453 20
02/22/2008 03:11 AM

I yam what I yam.

Pram 78,171 40
02/22/2008 03:15 AM

Al is so awesome, that when Bob Johnson let me start over.

Al is so awesome, that when he's in a room full of people, everyone spontaneously begins to smell and look like Shakespeare until he moves on to another room.

The Mailman, as portrayed by Jacques Tati 174,473 52
02/22/2008 03:34 AM

Al's "Smelly Frenchman" character on the Computer Stew was not based on the stereotype that the French were dirty. The stereotype originated from the character.

That's What She Said 26,017 24
02/22/2008 03:37 AM

Al once ate a 3-yr-old boy from his daughter's preschool because he looked at her funny.

Ravos, The Dreaded Gabberwocky 62,361 20
02/22/2008 03:40 AM

Al is so awesome, he can touch his elbows behind his back.

KChiki, not Kimchi 124,281 89
02/22/2008 03:41 AM

Al CAN lick his elbow.

The Mailman, as portrayed by Jacques Tati 174,473 52
02/22/2008 03:41 AM

Whenever Al attempts to use a Mac computer, it crashes out of sheer panic.

Space Admiral BobJohnson 177,873 22
02/22/2008 04:23 AM

Al once killed a woman by Shakespeare-ing in her shoes.

She died from excess happiness.

BillSalamie 66,795 11
02/22/2008 04:33 AM

Jim Croce wrote a song about how Leroy Brown and Slim were afraid of Al. But as he wrote it, his plane crashed from fear.

Whistler P. McManus 183,262 42
02/22/2008 04:39 AM

True story: we had a cat named Popeye, an elderly neutered, declawed, half blind male. He never went outdoors.

About three or four years ago, he disappeared. I often wondered what the hell happened to him. Now I know.

Frost-ing guy will eat anything.

Phuc 237,453 20
02/22/2008 04:41 AM

Spicy salted kitty.

Whistler P. McManus 183,262 42
02/22/2008 04:42 AM

I know, I know:

"Al ate Whistler's Poe1!!eleventy!"

I set myself up for that one.

Space Admiral BobJohnson 177,873 22
02/22/2008 05:00 AM

Al's farts are so melodic that he is officially recognized as the inspiration for most of the woodwinds.

Marmite blocks toilets 12,940 12
02/22/2008 05:17 AM

The original ending of the We Are The World video had to be cut cause everyone got bummed from the sheer hate pouring off Al made Bono cry.

Where I come from, this means something ENTIRELY different...

Whistler P. McManus 183,262 42
02/22/2008 05:18 AM

Interestingly enough, Bob, I have an Eisenbrandt fife in C circa War of 1812 that I have nicknamed Mr. Natanagara.

Fratberry 277,318 52
02/22/2008 05:20 AM

New, from K-Tel...

Al Natanagara and the Three Octave Anus

Fratberry 277,318 52
02/22/2008 05:24 AM

Puts Zamfir and that stupid pan flute to shame.

Phuc 237,453 20
02/22/2008 07:00 AM

Interestingly enough, Bob, I have an Eisenbrandt fife in C circa War of 1812 that I have nicknamed Mr. Natanagara.

Made my day.

Now excuse me, I have to go take a massive Shakespeare. They use my turds for urinal cakes.

Briham knows how to use the Three Seashells 38,843 9
02/22/2008 07:14 AM

Al was originally chosen to paint the Sistine Chapel, but then Michaelangelo bribed the Pope.

Mavis Beacon 18,219 13
02/22/2008 07:15 AM

Al Nataganagaganarangha wrote the dissenting opinion in Brown v. Board of Education.

Phuc 237,453 20
02/22/2008 08:26 PM

In China, my pee is Coca Cola.

KChiki, not Kimchi 124,281 89
02/22/2008 08:28 PM

...and it's used as an aphrodisiac, cure for cancer and a bold seasoning agent.

Miss, Throw me sumtin Mr. Trixxie 65,014 14
02/22/2008 08:49 PM

I can beat Al choked your chicken, chicken. Al greased my doornob.

Mung Champ 35,886 35
02/23/2008 01:25 AM

Al is the reason that Waldo is hiding.

Spicey McHaggis 114,978 33
02/23/2008 01:32 AM

There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures All hasn't eaten yet.

Space Admiral BobJohnson 177,873 22
02/23/2008 01:33 AM

Al is so powerful that if he tells you to lick a doorknob, you do it without asking any questions about why Trixxie is there.

Mung Champ 35,886 35
02/23/2008 01:51 AM

Al loves the ladies, and the ladies love him back... Or else!

Straw 95,470 36
02/23/2008 01:54 AM

Al fought the law, and Al won.

KChiki, not Kimchi 124,281 89
02/23/2008 02:37 AM

...in the first round, no less.


I'm riding on everyone's coattails today, apparently.

Mung Champ 35,886 35
02/23/2008 03:48 AM

Al's seamen cures cancer. Too bad he has AIDS.

Ravos, The Dreaded Gabberwocky 62,361 20
02/23/2008 03:49 AM

Al's seamen have scurvy real bad.

Straw 95,470 36
02/23/2008 03:50 AM

Apparently Al has his own Navy.

Obese 3,430 6
02/23/2008 07:30 AM

You should see his yellow Submarine.

Phuc 237,453 20
02/24/2008 08:23 AM

I'm more popular than Jesus.

Holy shit, a talking Phla! 130,632 34
02/24/2008 08:50 AM

There really are 37 'a's in his last name.

And not all of them are used for Good.

Holy shit, a talking Phla! 130,632 34
02/24/2008 09:29 AM

He doesn't use them for Evil either.

Because those words use other vowels.

Holy shit, a talking Phla! 130,632 34
02/24/2008 09:29 AM

...why don't you people think like I do?

Phuc 237,453 20
02/25/2008 01:14 AM

My excuse is that I never forget to take my meds.

syncope 49,000 13
02/25/2008 01:25 AM

In the early 1960s Al was asked if he thought Chinese girls were hot, to which he replied, "Meh."

The resulting governmental policies led to the systematic abortion of more than a million female Chinese babies.

KChiki needs a new witty tagline. 124,281 89
02/25/2008 01:27 AM

Al's awesomeness can only truly be measured on the "BobJohnson Scale".

Holy shit, a talking Phla! 130,632 34
02/25/2008 01:41 AM

There are no meds. The only prescription is more cowbell.

party trick: I can pee standing up 17,422 30
02/25/2008 02:01 AM

Al's belly button can talk to the voices in my head.

Chi Chi 161,287 14
02/25/2008 02:43 AM

Al hears the secrets that you keep... when you're talking in your sleep.

Phuc 237,453 20
02/25/2008 04:24 AM

That's what I like about you.

Pubic Name 387 5
02/26/2008 12:09 AM

contrary to popular belief, America is not a Democratic Republic...

It's an Altatorship

Mung Champ 35,886 35
02/26/2008 03:39 AM

Al has counted to infinity. Twice.

Millie 116,854 28
02/26/2008 03:48 AM

He's cuter than a speckled pup.

Crisis Managment Panda 181,263 70
02/26/2008 03:49 AM

Al's blood is almost pure animal fat, but has a smoke point of 900* Fahrenheit.

Crisis Managment Panda 181,263 70
02/26/2008 03:58 AM

The last time a GABber had an orgasm, it wasn't because their partner was good, but because Al happened to be reading on of their posts.

The last time Al had an orgasm, there was a small earthquake in Indonesia. And they liked it.

Loopy 6,902 11
02/26/2008 03:59 AM

Al is my friend on myspace.

Crisis Managment Panda 181,263 70
02/26/2008 04:00 AM

When Al is on myspace, it's called AL'sspace.

Crisis Managment Panda 181,263 70
02/26/2008 04:01 AM

When Al uses The Clapper, he only has to clap once. Once, he clapped twice, and the neighbor's garage door closed on their cat. Al ate it. And the neighbors liked it.

Crisis Managment Panda 181,263 70
02/26/2008 04:04 AM

Al doesn't need no stinking time managment. Al's time manages itself, and Mrs. Al's, too, if it knows what's good for it.

Mung Champ 35,886 35
02/26/2008 04:06 AM

Al always has sex on the first date. Always.

Crisis Managment Panda 181,263 70
02/26/2008 04:09 AM

Acutally, Al always gets sex before the first date.

Mung Champ 35,886 35
02/26/2008 04:14 AM

Al doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

Priestess uses Dax Wave and Groom hair dress 58,196 29
02/26/2008 04:45 AM

At the end of the world, Al will fight for Jesus and bring the tryannical rule of Celine Dion to it's end by snapping her neck with his mind.

Phuc 237,453 20
02/26/2008 04:56 AM

I once at a whole chicken.

And it wasn't a game hen, either. It was a roaster.

Crisis Managment Panda 181,263 70
02/26/2008 04:57 AM

Ever wonder who the proverbial "they" are? Al is on the They Committee.

Mung Champ 35,886 35
02/26/2008 05:01 AM

Al can roll a 10 on a six sided die.

Priestess uses Dax Wave and Groom hair dress 58,196 29
02/26/2008 05:01 AM

Al is the mother-Frosting Island and will bring Ben down.

Priestess uses Dax Wave and Groom hair dress 58,196 29
02/26/2008 05:03 AM

Al is the desert and doesn't miss the rain.

Priestess uses Dax Wave and Groom hair dress 58,196 29
02/26/2008 05:04 AM

Al could kick Sauron in the face without Chuck Norris' Action jeans.

Crisis Managment Panda 181,263 70
02/26/2008 05:08 AM

Al put the ram in the rama
lama ding dang.

Al know why birds sing so gay.

Al doesn't tell time. Time tells him before he even has to ask.

(It's like an illness. I can't stop!)

Priestess uses Dax Wave and Groom hair dress 58,196 29
02/26/2008 05:11 AM

Al can put your out of your misery.

Crisis Managment Panda 181,263 70
02/26/2008 05:13 AM

Al likes me, and therefore will let me live. He's also the reason I don't have plaque or calls from telemarketers.

Priestess uses Dax Wave and Groom hair dress 58,196 29
02/26/2008 05:22 AM

Al can teach me how to spell.

Pubic Name 387 5
02/26/2008 05:55 AM

Al can slam a revolving door

Pubic Name 387 5
02/26/2008 06:00 AM

T is for Al, as is every other letter of the alphabet.

Pubic Name 387 5
02/26/2008 06:01 AM

Al does NOT love Raymond.

Al is the one who let the dogs out

dropkick brody 43,075 12
02/26/2008 06:06 AM

X is for Al, mother-Frosters!

Whistler P. McManus 183,262 42
02/26/2008 06:17 AM

When Chickens died and went to heaven, he was surprised to see Al there.

"I didn't know Al had died," said Chickens.

"That's not Al," said Saint Peter, "That's just God in an Al costume. He wishes he was Al."

Briham knows how to use the Three Seashells 38,843 9
02/26/2008 06:59 AM

When Al wants shark fin soup, he sails out to the middle of the ocean and dangles his penis in the water like it was a giant worm.

Thud 66,695 17
02/26/2008 07:02 AM

Al ate lunch and enjoyed it.

Pubic Name 387 5
02/26/2008 09:31 AM

Who is this Al character anyway?

Thud 66,695 17
02/26/2008 09:34 AM

Who is this Al character anyway?

Did you ever watch the movie "Chopping Mall"?





















Well, he wasn't in that.

Jihad Joe: The REAL Arabian Hero 6,045 7
02/26/2008 09:35 AM

Al likes pasta. RICH PEOPLE pasta.

Chi Chi 161,287 14
02/26/2008 09:43 AM

Al can find the square root of -1.

Thud 66,695 17
02/26/2008 09:45 AM

Al is shorter than Skippy and he DOESN'T CARE!

Chi Chi 161,287 14
02/26/2008 09:53 AM

Al is an anagram for "La."

Jihad Joe: The REAL Arabian Hero 6,045 7
02/26/2008 09:55 AM

Al is mighty.

Thud 66,695 17
02/26/2008 12:09 PM

Al proved that Young's modulus doesn't always apply in the bedroom.

TWSS - Pure Redneck 26,017 24
02/26/2008 12:24 PM

John gave you Gab, Al can take it away.

Phuc 237,453 20
02/26/2008 06:15 PM

True story: I've used the ban button at least 30 times.

Sadly, it was almost always for the same two people.

Mung Champ 35,886 35
02/26/2008 10:05 PM

Al once challenged Lance Armstrong in a "Who has more testicles?" contest. Al won by 5.

Phuc 237,453 20
02/27/2008 12:05 AM

I'm number two!

Mung Champ 35,886 35
02/27/2008 12:32 AM

After Computer Stew was canceled, Al created a "Jump To Conclusions" mat which failed miserably.

The mat is now used exclusively for his Suzie McMuffin pud-yanking sessions.

Shell Belle 76,640 24
02/27/2008 12:44 AM

Al built Stonehenge.

Chix in da Mix 282,028 58
02/27/2008 12:47 AM

Al sure can suck a mean dick.

Mung Champ 35,886 35
02/27/2008 01:29 AM

Al isn't hung like a horse. Horse's are hung like Al.

Chix in da Mix 282,028 58
02/27/2008 01:40 AM

Al never whines when he doesn't get a reach-around. Hell of a guy.

TWSS - Pure Redneck 26,017 24
02/27/2008 02:26 AM

Al went to Scotland once for vacation. No one there had ever seen a man so great, so ever since, they've worn skirts to honor him.

Chi Chi 161,287 14
02/27/2008 02:50 AM

Unlike King Cobra Malt Liquor, you will let Al's smooth taste fool you.

Fezig on his way to the castle anthrax 3,711 6
02/27/2008 03:29 AM

Al's sperm is so powerful...he once blew the door off a safe with it.

Fezig on his way to the castle anthrax 3,711 6
02/27/2008 03:33 AM

Al can kick the ass of any person who say's "Beef flied lice"

Mung Champ 35,886 35
02/27/2008 03:52 AM

Al played Russian Roulette with an AK-47 and won.

KChiki, not Kimchi 124,281 89
02/27/2008 04:47 AM

Al once won a game of poker with a 2 of Hearts, a Green Card, a "Get Out Of Jail Free" Card, a $2 bill and an I.O.U..

Phuc 237,453 20
02/27/2008 05:00 AM

I once thumb-wrestled Shelly Duvall at the Bellagio Hotel in Las Vegas and lost.

Phuc 237,453 20
02/27/2008 05:00 AM

^ true story

Rene 1,796 10
02/27/2008 05:30 AM

I once thumb-wrestled Shelly Duvall at the Bellagio Hotel in Las Vegas and lost.

Even though she won the bet, she stipped for him anyway.

Rene 1,796 10
02/27/2008 07:04 AM

Al ate my r because it smelled like bacon.

JakAus 310 6
02/27/2008 08:28 AM

You ever wonder why the earth keeps rotating. Al never wonders about that Shakespeare. Cause Al is Al. Mutha-Froster

JakAus 310 6
02/27/2008 08:29 AM

Al ate the purple pill.

JakAus 310 6
02/27/2008 08:30 AM

Al knows everything there is to now. But Al ain't telling. Got a problem with that. Mutha-Frosta

Ravos, The Dreaded Gabberwocky 62,361 20
02/27/2008 10:12 PM

Al once found a secret message in his cereal. It said "ooooooo"

Fezig on his way to the castle anthrax 3,711 6
02/28/2008 01:47 AM

Al was once on a flight that was the inspiration for Snakes on a Plane.

The only difference was the only snake on Al's plane was hanging out of his zipper and it killed every man on the plane MotherF'r!

Obese 3,430 6
02/28/2008 01:54 AM

Al only has one speed ludicrous.

Ravos, The Dreaded Gabberwocky 62,361 20
02/28/2008 01:58 AM

Al has 2 speeds: Walk & Kill

The Rev. Big Irish Guy, Jr. 203,777 21
02/28/2008 01:59 AM

Al slapped God in the face by marrying internet people.

Phuc 237,453 20
02/28/2008 02:03 AM

Al slapped God in the face by marrying internet people.

Hey! I draw the line at unholy unions that will end in tears, felonies, and ultimate Internet humiliation.

Mung Champ 35,886 35
02/28/2008 02:15 AM

Al once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.

Ravos, The Dreaded Gabberwocky 62,361 20
02/28/2008 02:28 AM

Al gets the job done 60% of the time, all the time.

The Mailman, as portrayed by Jacques Tati 174,473 52
02/28/2008 02:43 AM

Al knows better than to copy old Chuck Norris facts, replace "Chuck Norris" with the name "Al," and post them in this thread, because that would be retarded.

Ravos, The Dreaded Gabberwocky 62,361 20
02/28/2008 03:55 AM

Al is so holy, he can make 2 people saints of the same thing.

KChiki, not Kimchi 124,281 89
02/28/2008 04:29 AM

Al: "Chuck who?"

Mung Champ 35,886 35
02/28/2008 05:04 AM

Al knows when you've been sleeping and knows when your awake.

Pubic Name 387 5
02/28/2008 10:09 AM

How do you make Al laugh?

Tell him your plans for the future.

AL IS THE FUTURE!

Thud 66,695 17
02/28/2008 10:49 AM

Al once stood still long enough that pigeons crapped on his head that street artists began initiating him.

Thus the birth of painted morons standing on street corners.

Viper6 28 5
02/28/2008 07:49 PM

Al Raped the second gunman on the grassy knoll.......then killed and grilled him

Mung Champ 35,886 35
02/28/2008 10:16 PM

Al doesn't know how to spell Frost!

Fezig on his way to the castle anthrax 3,711 6
02/29/2008 04:38 AM

If Al had invaded Afghanistan - he would have found Osama Bin Laden...






































And ripped him in two with his bare hands!

Fratberry 277,318 52
02/29/2008 04:51 AM

Al once created his own language with one word for "happy" and thirty seven words that meant "bitter".

Phuc 237,453 20
02/29/2008 08:24 PM

I put no sugar in my coffee.

None.

KChiki, not Kimchi 124,281 89
02/29/2008 08:28 PM

Al doesn't step on toes. He steps on NECKS.

Mung Champ 35,886 35
02/29/2008 09:31 PM

Al puts the Asian in Caucasian.

Mung Champ 35,886 35
03/02/2008 10:55 PM

Al would be more apathetic if he weren't so lethargic.

Ravos, The Dreaded Gabberwocky 62,361 20
03/03/2008 09:23 PM

Al has his own fact thread.

Mung Champ 35,886 35
03/03/2008 09:59 PM

Al is not a communist. He may be a liar, a pig, an idiot, a communist, but he is not a porn star.

TIM-MAH, esq. 4 5
03/04/2008 12:29 AM

Good family guy joke Mungchimp.
At the risk of being flamed, who is this "Al" character? From what I have read, he is some sort of psuedo-Chuck Norris. A link to a video, a thread, etc.

C'est ce qu'elle a dit 26,017 24
03/04/2008 12:33 AM

Al is Al. If you've been here longer than 5 minutes you'd know who Al is.

Ravos, The Dreaded Gabberwocky 62,361 20
03/04/2008 12:39 AM

This is Al

KChiki, not Kimchi 124,281 89
03/04/2008 01:59 AM

Looking upon the face of Al is like looking at the sun...it's fun and makes you feel important that you CAN look at it, but the resultant blindness really ruins the experience.

Mung Champ 35,886 35
03/04/2008 02:34 AM

Its a Simpson's reference. But Al already knew that, just like he knew about the cursed Frogurt.

Chance 171,220 14
03/04/2008 02:39 AM

There is no 'ctrl' button on Phuc's computer. Phuc is always in control.

Phuc 237,453 20
03/04/2008 03:10 AM

Chance contains Sodium Benzoate.

Dogs Akimbo 205,285 31
03/04/2008 04:43 AM

Chance once shot a man with a paint gun just to watch him dye.

Thud 66,695 17
03/04/2008 05:46 AM

Al put the "oov" in Groovy.



Nope, doesn't even make sense to me. Oh well.

C'est ce qu'elle a dit 26,017 24
03/04/2008 06:10 AM

Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis is not the longest word in the English language. Al's last name is.

Phuc 237,453 20
03/04/2008 06:04 PM

Je mange sur les pieds des canards.<action>is going to regret not using the babelfish</action>

Phuc 237,453 20
03/04/2008 06:32 PM

Goddamnit!!!

Ravos, The Dreaded Gabberwocky 62,361 20
03/05/2008 02:12 AM

Al makes the world go 'round.

Briham knows how to use the Three Seashells 38,843 9
03/05/2008 10:33 PM

Al's complaint about Americanized Chinese food caused this lady to write a book.

Cattnip 795 6
03/06/2008 12:42 AM

Al's leftovers alone can solve world hunger...





...Too bad he never leaves any.

Viper6 28 5
03/06/2008 07:43 PM

Al's Dick has a red flashing light so planes dont hit it.

Cinderblock 27,522 24
03/10/2008 12:12 AM

"He slept with all of our wives and punched us all in the face!"

"And we loved him for it!"

"TO BILL BRASKY AL NATANAGARA!"

Phuc 237,453 20
03/10/2008 12:52 AM

I saw Semi-Pro last night and I liked it.

Jep - Now One of Those Annoying ex-Smoker People 58,563 13
03/10/2008 01:05 AM

Al has unforgivably bad taste in movie comedies.

Ravos, The Dreaded Gabberwocky 62,361 20
03/10/2008 11:26 PM

Al puts the laughter in manslaughter

Ravos, The Dreaded Gabberwocky 62,361 20
03/10/2008 11:26 PM

He puts the sexy back in dyslexia

Mung Champ 35,886 35
03/19/2008 04:44 AM

Al took Kumar to White Castle.

Phuc 237,453 20
03/19/2008 06:59 AM

And I Frosted Freakshow's wife.

KChiki, Princess of Power! 124,281 89
06/19/2008 10:18 PM

My husband found this thread and made me bump it because he has a man-crush on Al.

Shell Belle 76,640 24
06/19/2008 10:20 PM

Al is loved by all short people.

Bean 7,930 17
06/19/2008 10:47 PM

Al is getting stroked so much in this thread, I'm afraid of the massive impending cum glob.

Thud 66,695 17
06/19/2008 10:52 PM

Bean, you really are a sweet talker.

Mr. Cocksucker 237,453 20
06/20/2008 06:30 AM

Al is getting stroked so much in this thread, I'm afraid of the massive impending cum glob.

For you, Bean, I'll wear a kryptonite rubba.

Fezig - the other Mike Rowe 3,711 6
06/20/2008 10:49 AM

Al is the other white meat.

Barefoot Chance 171,220 14
06/20/2008 10:51 AM

Al isnt white, but he is meat.

So that fact is 50 percent fiction.

Vaguely Ravos 62,361 20
06/20/2008 04:01 PM

So that fact is 50 percent fiction.

Just like Al!

Dogs Akimbo 205,285 31
06/21/2008 12:43 PM

There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures All hasn't eaten yet.

It is no coincidence that it's called the ALimentary canal.

Fezig - the other Mike Rowe 3,711 6
06/23/2008 02:02 PM

Alimony - what women do after sex with Al.

Fezig - the other Mike Rowe 3,711 6
06/26/2008 11:40 AM

Big Bang Theory -


Not a theory, just the pharse used at the birth of Al.

MungChamp 35,886 35
04/28/2009 11:35 AM

For Mr Coleridgesucker.

Jeeni Beanie 43,386 49
04/28/2009 10:59 PM

Al's takes really Frost-ing fine pictures as well as being an excellent cartoonist.

Test Tube Baby 828 5
04/28/2009 11:23 PM

Al is so awesome nuns want to have his baby.

Thud 66,695 17
04/28/2009 11:29 PM

Al is so awesome nuns want to have his baby.

But, in keeping with the Spirit of Al, they plan to consume the babies as an afternoon snack.

Nun are Frosted up.

Wino Willie McManus 183,262 42
04/29/2009 09:29 AM

Before the boogyman goes to bed at night, he checks his closet and under his bed to make sure Al's not there.

Dougie 59 4
04/29/2009 03:46 PM

Years ago, Al took whizz in a bottle, in a deep, dark alleyway, for lack of public toilets.

A young homeless person mistakenly took a few sips, not realizing what it was. Then, almost as soon as the yellow liquid splashed into his stomach, he felt energised, he had a higher state of awareness. So, he managed to track down Al, and convince him to manufacture this wonder juice.

Nowadays, we call this beverage, 'Red Bull'.

TheVelveTurd 6,551 10
04/29/2009 04:15 PM

Al gave me a black eye with an email.

Test Tube Baby 828 5
04/29/2009 05:49 PM

Satan's minions fear Al.

Thud 66,695 17
04/29/2009 05:55 PM

Al won a MMA match by blinking at his opponent.

Phuc 237,453 20
04/29/2009 07:21 PM

I pee sitting down first thing in the morning because it's still dark and I don't want turn on the light.

Cream Cheese Lobster Dumplings 17,422 30
04/29/2009 09:38 PM

Al owns a FUBAR. It's prolly the manliest tool alive. Except that Al killed it.

MungChamp 35,886 35
04/30/2009 08:32 AM

Al destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprisesupplies!

KChiki - Flu Free! (knock on wood) 124,281 89
04/30/2009 08:35 AM

Al emailed me a drawring that crawled out of my monitor, cooked dinner AND did the dishes.

Bill the Squirrel 53,130 53
04/30/2009 08:57 AM

Al sent Turd boy a e-mail, the e-mail then crawled out of the screen and wrote an inane artice.

KChiki - Flu Free! (knock on wood) 124,281 89
04/30/2009 08:58 AM

Al once stabbed a man with a chicken foot just to watch him die.

Madame KChiki 124,281 89
04/12/2010 03:33 AM

I felt it was time to resurrect this thread.

SHP 181,263 70
04/12/2010 03:49 AM

Al puts the laughter in manslaughter.

Big Irish Guy 203,777 21
04/12/2010 03:49 AM

I think its time you show your boobs. So make with the tits before I punch you in the Carroll.

SHP 181,263 70
04/12/2010 03:50 AM

SHP puts the doesn'treadthreads in SHPdoesn'treadthreads.

First Straw of Spring 95,470 36
04/12/2010 04:17 AM

Whenever Al pees in a field, people think the resulting designs were made by aliens.

SHP 181,263 70
04/12/2010 06:01 AM

Whenever I pee, it burns. I actually don't attribute this to Al. But probably that's also something for him to be proud of.

Spring Fresh Midgets 93,936 47
04/12/2010 09:47 AM

Can Al cook a dish so vile even he won't eat it?

The Grand Imperial Priestess 58,196 29
04/12/2010 10:31 AM

I was gonna get some blood-work done, but Al just looked at me and told me I needed more iron.

SHP 181,263 70
04/12/2010 11:45 AM

I met Al once. I'm alive today. Coincidence? I think not!