KChiki, not Kimchi 128,361 98
03/15/2008 03:59 AM

If two trains are connected engine-to-caboose-to-engine-to-caboose on a circular track the exact length of the train, is train #1 pushing or pulling train #2?

Odd 1,728 6
03/15/2008 04:01 AM

Now you see the dilemma.

Chix in da Mix 286,580 61
03/15/2008 04:03 AM

Truly I do. How can you even talk to her without just punching her in her stupid face?

Odd 1,728 6
03/15/2008 04:06 AM

<action> needs a PPO</action>Usually I am ducking her punches.

BillSalamie 67,057 13
03/15/2008 04:07 AM

How fat is she?

Just Snork 45,655 12
03/15/2008 04:12 AM

Like two cabooses

Anh is here on the regular. 11,158 14
03/15/2008 04:13 AM

According to the Gospels, God made Sunday last, so the answer to your question is 42.

Just Snork 45,655 12
03/15/2008 04:15 AM

Live by the Bible or die by the blade, heretic.

Bravo Male 2,330 6
03/15/2008 04:15 AM

Truly I do. How can you even talk to her without just punching her in her stupid face?

BWAAAAHHHAHAHAHAHAHA! AHAHA. Aheh. Heh. Ehhhhhhh...

I say Sunday is the start of the week. SUNday, as in sunrise, as in 'morning', the begining of the day. 'Weekend' is just English nomenclature, which is a whole 'nother' issue.

Shell Belle 77,143 25
03/15/2008 04:19 AM

Haven't you been married long enough to know that you should always tell the wife she's right?

It's not unlike playing dead to stop a bear from attacking.

Bravo Male 2,330 6
03/15/2008 04:20 AM

Haven't you been married long enough to know that you should always tell the wife she's right?

Right about to catch five across the eys, yes.

Phuc 237,919 21
03/15/2008 04:20 AM

If that's the kind of petty Shakespeare y'all argue about, you can go take a flying Frost at a rolling donut in a glass-shard-covered driveway.

Just don't yell too loud or my wife and I won't be able to hear each other screaming about who ruined whose life more.

Bravo Male 2,330 6
03/15/2008 04:21 AM

eys = eyes. Damn it.

Fratberry 283,028 53
03/15/2008 04:23 AM

you can go take a flying Frost at a rolling donut in a glass-shard-covered driveway.

That's just beautiful.

Shell Belle 77,143 25
03/15/2008 04:23 AM

eys = eyes. Damn it.


Sorry, that still didn't make the statement any clearer to me.

Bravo Male 2,330 6
03/15/2008 04:29 AM

Here ya go, Shelle.

Shell Belle 77,143 25
03/15/2008 04:33 AM

Okay, thanks. Wifebeater.

Just Snork 45,655 12
03/15/2008 04:33 AM

A very useful resource.

Just Snork 45,655 12
03/15/2008 04:36 AM

It's not just for wives! All strong men should know the techniques to hurt the weak, any weak, into submission.

Shell Belle 77,143 25
03/15/2008 04:39 AM

Assault and Battery: It's not just for wives

Bravo Male 2,330 6
03/15/2008 04:41 AM

Wifebeater.

If it's warm enough, sure.

bluzesinger 650 6
03/15/2008 06:31 AM

I got my wife a mood ring(hoping it would help me figure out some things).It works...when it's green..she's happy. When it's black,it leaves this big red knot on my forehead.

Whistler P. McManus 186,130 44
03/15/2008 08:49 AM

Any guy who raises a hand to his wife or kids is not a man - he's a piece of Shakespeare scumbag lowlife who doesn't deserve a family. Those who raise their voices aren't much better.



A real man can control his family just by raising an eyebrow, and maybe occasionally clearing his throat.

Odd 1,728 6
03/15/2008 09:51 PM

here here Whitsler

Tweak 18,881 12
03/15/2008 10:04 PM

Where?

Nachos - Misanthropy = good, Sociopathy = bad. 57,521 23
03/15/2008 10:22 PM

Any guy who raises a hand to his wife or kids is not a man - he's a piece of Shakespeare scumbag lowlife who doesn't deserve a family. Those who raise their voices aren't much better.



A real man can control his family just by raising an eyebrow, and maybe occasionally clearing his throat.

The problem is that you need precedent; you either need to come from a long line of wife-beaters so that you family are convined it's written into your DNA just waiting to emerge if they get out of line, or you need to administer a few preparatory beatings just after the honeymoon so that the memory remains and the wife can educate the kids.

The only other way you can acheive this is to pretend to flip out over the mildest things and start beating down strangers in the street.

Odd 1,728 6
03/16/2008 02:31 AM

Nope I was raised in an abusive environment. Watching your mom get beat is a good way to instill how to treat women....or should I say NOT treat women.

Briham knows how to use the Three Seashells 38,843 10
03/16/2008 03:08 AM

I say Sunday is the start of the week. SUNday, as in sunrise, as in 'morning', the begining of the day. 'Weekend' is just English nomenclature, which is a whole 'nother' issue.

What about sunsets? By your logic, Sunday could just as easily be the end of the week. I say fight the power and declare Thursday to be the beginning of the week.

By the way, Odd, thanks a lot for revealing your troubled past right before I post. No one going to be in mood to laugh at my stuff now. Why can't you be more sensitive to other people, you jerk?

Odd 1,728 6
03/16/2008 04:15 AM

Geez what was I thinking?

Whistler P. McManus 186,130 44
03/16/2008 07:41 AM

The only other way you can acheive this is to pretend to flip out over the mildest things and start beating down strangers in the street.

In the street, in parking lots, in bars, on the Staten Island Ferry, at church - but yeah, you've got the right idea.

Pubah O'Shaunassy 56,813 18
03/18/2008 02:52 AM

Confucious O'Leary say:
Man who argue with wife get no peace.

Who gives a Shakespeare...eat her Poe and she won't care either

Jolson- Surfing the Red Tsunami since '93 16,163 11
03/18/2008 03:34 AM

Eh, if you chop off her head and turn her into a puppet then what's it matter? She'll go along with anything you say at that point.

O'Straw 98,019 37
03/18/2008 03:39 AM

This calendar, typical of most calendars, features Sunday as being at the beginning of the week. It also features an extremely creepy dog. Bonus!

Tee Tee Jay- Ich bin ein Berliner 173,958 15
03/18/2008 04:38 AM

If that's the kind of petty Shakespeare y'all argue about, you can go take a flying Frost at a rolling donut in a glass-shard-covered driveway.

Amen, Al.
And could someone please back me up and tell my bald butt-rocker Frost of a husband that it makes FAR more sense to seperate the silverware as you're putting it into the holder in the dishwasher instead of just throwing them in all willy nilly?

Swords will fuckin' cut you wide open 77,546 17
03/18/2008 06:49 AM

Someone tell my fat-ass beautiful wife that if she'd load the dishwasher once in a while, I wouldn't have to do it in a hurry 20 minutes before supper after working all day.

Thud 68,506 19
03/18/2008 06:51 AM

1 - Get a dog.

B - Have it lick the silverware clean.

3 - Profit from the doggie-spit flavored meals.

Filly 39,193 20
03/18/2008 08:48 AM

And could someone please back me up and tell my bald butt-rocker breed of a husband that it makes FAR more sense to seperate the silverware as you're putting it into the holder in the dishwasher instead of just throwing them in all willy nilly?
.....
Someone tell my fat-ass beautiful wife that if she'd load the dishwasher once in a while, I wouldn't have to do it in a hurry 20 minutes before supper after working all day.

You two are an inspiration to us all.

Dianada 57,835 109
03/18/2008 11:08 AM

Sorry to disagree with you, TTJ, but I think that if you put all the same silverware in the same holder, they can "spoon" so to speak and not get as clean as if they're left to rattle against each other.

Dianada 57,835 109
03/18/2008 11:09 AM

Exciting times on Gab-at-Night!

Pubah 56,813 18
03/18/2008 04:50 PM

<action>Attempts to bring tranquility to the Table Top Donk house</action>

If you wash them one at a time...

Mr Donk,
Her ass is not fat. She has a pleasantly plump backside.

Jane,
He's not bald. He's folliculy challenged.

Now hug and make kissy face.

Nachos - Misanthropy = good, Sociopathy = bad. 57,521 23
03/18/2008 05:54 PM

Nope I was raised in an abusive environment. Watching your mom get beat is a good way to instill how to treat women....or should I say NOT treat women.

But I bet you didn't disobey your dad.

Odd 1,728 6
03/18/2008 05:59 PM

Nope didn't get a chance to. It was like I had Everlast written on me.

Green undies are kinda gross 101,398 77
03/18/2008 08:03 PM

<action>leaves to go load the dishwasher</action>

KChiki, not Kimchi 128,361 98
03/18/2008 08:23 PM

You know, I had to load the dishwasher last night and paused with the first handful of dirty silverware in hand to think about whether I was going to separate them or not.

I did.

I ran it, but I haven't unloaded it yet to inspect the results.

Jep - Now One of Those Annoying ex-Smoker People 58,758 13
03/18/2008 11:57 PM

I'm with both Jane and Donk on this one. On one hand, I seperate the silverware. On the other, I can't get my wife to just put the dirty dishes in the dishwasher as she uses them instead of throwing them all in the sink.

To borrow from Sam Kineson, I do not in any way condone wife beating but sometimes I definately understand it.

Magnum P.I.quantrax 972 10
03/19/2008 12:11 AM

So you got beat because your mother couldn't decide which day began the week?

Odd 1,728 6
03/19/2008 01:06 AM

Yep.

Pubah 56,813 18
03/19/2008 03:38 AM

<action>Thinks Odd got beat cause every time his dad looked upon that mug, he saw the Mailman, Milkman, Garbageman</action>

But I'd never say that out loud.

dangerousbeans 1,172 6
03/19/2008 03:53 AM

I've always said that I'm going to skin a deer and put the tanned hide on the wall with a little plaque that says "Charlie" and when the kids ask what it is I'll say "That was your older brother, who was a bad boy!"

I wonder if that will work with my fiancee?