Spamurai Snork 45,655 12
10/08/2008 03:38 PM

Well that was sure revealing.

Don't air all your dirty laundry in one post now.

Suicide Ranger is eating candy corn. 27,937 12
10/08/2008 03:38 PM

Trim your damn nose hairs woman. It is probably looks like flock of seagulls in there.

Suicide Ranger is eating candy corn. 27,937 12
10/08/2008 03:42 PM

You should probably just go back to breathing through your mouth like you normally do.

Professor Nutbutter 181,311 35
10/08/2008 03:45 PM

I'm wearing Chance's underwear.

Spamurai Snork 45,655 12
10/08/2008 03:47 PM

You too?!

Spamurai Snork 45,655 12
10/08/2008 03:47 PM

Chance, you slut.

Fratberry 283,028 53
10/08/2008 03:58 PM

I'm wearing Nutbutter's vagina.











































On my face.

Chance-izz got yer candy right here mister. 171,275 14
10/08/2008 04:06 PM

I too am wearing Chance's panties.

What a slut!

Professor Nutbutter 181,311 35
10/08/2008 04:14 PM

I'm wearing Nutbutter's vagina.

It originally belonged to Chance. The warranty is non-transferable.

Chance-izz got yer candy right here mister. 171,275 14
10/08/2008 04:16 PM

but the crabs are transferable!

Wait, what?

Declan McManus as Gabriel Conroy 131,887 36
10/08/2008 04:42 PM

Do you really want me to post further in this thread?


If you do not, then make with the orbs.

Whistler P. McManus 186,130 44
10/08/2008 04:45 PM

I saw A Flock of Seagulls in 1983. They opened for The Police.

Suicide Ranger is eating candy corn. 27,937 12
10/08/2008 04:53 PM

I like to watch people as they sleep, just watch them breathe.

What the Duce? 313 5
10/08/2008 05:46 PM

There's a spot on my foot that itches.
I scratch it...
It dosen't stop itching.

What the Duce? 313 5
10/08/2008 05:47 PM

oh and i saw a license plate that said PRAM on it, while i was out.

Nachos 57,521 23
10/08/2008 06:50 PM

I'd add something to this conversation, but it probably counts as admissible evidence.

Maverick Independent Chickens 286,580 61
10/08/2008 07:12 PM

Asparagus REALLY effects the smell of my pee. REALLY.

You should smell it.
Really.

Declan McManus as Gabriel Conroy 131,887 36
10/08/2008 07:15 PM

I'd love to!

Filly 39,193 20
10/08/2008 07:33 PM

I multitask while I poo. Plucking eyebrows, putting on makeup, typing stuff up....Chances are good that if you've ever talked to me on IM, you've talked to me while I've taken a dump.

I get some kind of perverse pleasure out of that.

Suicide Ranger is eating candy corn. 27,937 12
10/08/2008 07:42 PM

What about over the phone?

ZackDDoggy 212 0
10/08/2008 09:02 PM

Unlike many people(I've observed them doing just that)I never look at whatever I hack up or blow into a kleenex. I think that that's just disgusting and unnervingly morbid.


Or the T.P after I wipe my butt. It goes straight into the toilet without another thought.

Cinderblock is, like, super scary. 27,578 25
10/08/2008 09:18 PM

I understand your squeamishness, Zach, but a total ignorance of your normal bodily functions will prevent you from knowing when something is wrong. For example, clear, thin mucous discharged from the sinuses is normal. Thick, cloudy, yellow, or bloody mucous is a sign of infection.

Oh, and: boobs.

ZackDDoggy 212 0
10/08/2008 09:34 PM

Still, a cold or a flu won't kill me, looking at loogies makes me queasy. As soon as I start coughing up blood, I'll take a TB test.

Thud: The Devil's Moustache 68,506 19
10/08/2008 09:48 PM

A flu won't kill you? Try looking up the Influenza pandemic of 1918. Link.

ZackDDoggy 212 0
10/08/2008 10:04 PM

Shakespeare! When is 1918 coming back? I need a shot against that dreadful Spanish Flu! Where can I get one? Oh God! Where?

Cinderblock is, like, super scary. 27,578 25
10/08/2008 10:20 PM

a cold or a flu won't kill me

Hahahahhaahah suuuuure.

Cinderblock is, like, super scary. 27,578 25
10/08/2008 10:20 PM

Shakespeare. I should read the whole thread before posting.

Cinderblock is, like, super scary. 27,578 25
10/08/2008 10:22 PM

Shakespeare! When is 1918 coming back? I need a shot against that dreadful Spanish Flu! Where can I get one? Oh God! Where?

I can't even tell you how ignorant this statement is. Just because it was ninety years ago doesn't mean that a highly mutated flu virus wouldn't decimate our population today. I have a whole shelf of books you should read on the subject... me, I just look at the pictures.

The Hippy Priestess 58,948 29
10/08/2008 10:25 PM

I do nothing wierd. I am perfectly normal in every way.


There is this one thing, but I was aquitted.

Jade - Queen Of Mistakes 14,453 11
10/09/2008 07:15 AM

a cold or a flu won't kill me

Haven't you ever read The Stand?

Alpha Wolf 1,062 12
10/09/2008 07:58 AM

I am unable to achieve orgasm during wet dreams.



Maybe Marylin Manson just doesn't "do it" for me...

Professor Nutbutter 181,311 35
10/09/2008 09:45 AM

I am unable to achieve orgasm during wet dreams.

Then they're not wet dreams. Unless you count drooling.

Suicide Ranger is eating candy corn. 27,937 12
10/09/2008 12:41 PM

I have some sick fetish of pulling hairs out of my body. Anywhere on my body. Plucking hairs from anywhere you can think of.

Except my palms it just making things smoother if I leave that there.

Chance-izz got yer candy right here mister. 171,275 14
10/09/2008 01:39 PM

E to the W, red man.

I have no feeling in my nipples, which makes for fun with melted wax! I also have freckles everywhere, and I do mean everywhere.

Professor Nutbutter 181,311 35
10/09/2008 01:41 PM

Yeah, I'm sure they're just freckles.

Ravos as Mr.T 63,472 21
10/09/2008 01:49 PM

"Its not a tumah!"

Chance-izz got yer candy right here mister. 171,275 14
10/09/2008 02:21 PM

"freckles"

I got them from you!

You cant catch freckles? Oh.

Professor Nutbutter 181,311 35
10/09/2008 02:26 PM

Not only did I catch Freckles, but I kicked the crap out of her for running away.

Stupid cat.

Jerkenstein 6,311 9
10/09/2008 02:29 PM

I took a dump this morning that piled up so high it stuck out of the water like a Shakespeareberg.

Suicide Ranger is eating candy corn. 27,937 12
10/09/2008 02:43 PM

Maybe you need to adjust your fiber intake.

Crash Test Dracula 3,671 9
10/09/2008 03:34 PM

I'm so Frosted up on cold medicine that this morning while doing the laundry, I poured some detergent in my coffee, took a sip, spit it out, then dumped the whole cup in the washing machine thinking of how stupid I was for drinking liquid soap.













15 minutes later, I had to wash the clothes all over again, as it never even occured to me that what I had emptied in the washer was my soap laced coffee...

Bloody Undies 101,398 77
10/09/2008 04:40 PM

onion sliver
anal adventures
I had sex with an internet stranger
My uterus is a barren wasteland
runny poops

I don't think there is anything left that you guys don't already know about me.

Suicide Ranger is eating candy corn. 27,937 12
10/09/2008 04:52 PM

Don't forget you posted your cootch.

Bloody Undies 101,398 77
10/09/2008 04:58 PM

I guess no one has forgotten about that, huh?

Suicide Ranger is eating candy corn. 27,937 12
10/09/2008 05:01 PM

It's poster sized on the side of my ti pi.

Chance-izz got yer candy right here mister. 171,275 14
10/09/2008 05:37 PM

I guess no one has forgotten about that, huh?

Well, maybe if you spent less time thinking about my cooch....

just a suggestion.

Maverick Independent Chickens 286,580 61
10/09/2008 06:22 PM

I also have freckles everywhere, and I do mean everywhere.


I'll believe that when I see it in a jpg file in my email. Till then, I call fat freckled daughter.

Chance-izz got yer candy right here mister. 171,275 14
10/09/2008 07:49 PM

I'm sorry Chix, but I no longer have to post nudes to be accepted. That is so 3 years ago.

F R A N K E N P R A M 80,728 42
10/09/2008 08:44 PM

Sometimes, I like to play with my hammeroids and give them a little squeeze.

SquidBoy 19,912 12
10/09/2008 10:33 PM

I no longer have to post nudes to be accepted.

But you do still enjoy it, right?

Ravos McRavosberg 63,472 21
10/10/2008 02:36 PM

I've been growing a beard for halloween. I looked in the mirror a few minutes ago and thought "This beard is itchyand I always find myself stroking it. A lot like my penis."

hisboyelroy 10,621 13
10/10/2008 04:23 PM

my poops have nests.

Stuffed Lobster Tail 18,570 33
10/10/2008 06:34 PM

I haven't pooped in like, 4 days. And my pee is all weird smelling from the hormones of my preggosity.

Whistler P. McManus 186,130 44
10/10/2008 11:53 PM

I have no feeling in my nipples, which makes for fun with melted wax!

Why do you not have feeling in your nipples? Have your hooters been surgically altered?

Hammerhead-less Horseman 59,399 14
10/11/2008 12:33 AM

I think it's the ice she rubs them down with.

Dogs Akimbo 211,594 32
10/11/2008 04:16 PM

I have eczema or something inside my left ear, inside the folds.

When I'm taking a poop, I use a fingernail to scrape out the dry, flaky skin and then I let it fall to the floor.

After scraping off the dead skin, the area is covered in a slippery fluid that I like to pretend is whale oil.

Declan McManus as Gabriel Conroy 131,887 36
10/11/2008 04:41 PM

I like to pretend is whale oil


Thar he blows!?

Suicide Ranger is eating candy corn. 27,937 12
10/11/2008 05:02 PM

If I don't take a shower every day, my hair becomes so oily it looks as if it is wet. If a go 2 days with no shower. The oily build up becomes like some organic hair gel and I can style it and it will stay. I am stranded out where I can't shower and a 3rd day happens to pass. The hair takes on a semi rancid oil smell... I've never managed to make it 3 days before I want to cut my own head off. 3 days only happens if I am camping some where.

Chance-izz got yer candy right here mister. 171,275 14
10/11/2008 05:05 PM

Have you ever thought about showering every day but only washing your hair every other day? Um..that would seem more logical than having crotch rot an extra day because your hair gets greasy. Damn SR.

Suicide Ranger is eating candy corn. 27,937 12
10/11/2008 09:19 PM

I have to wash my hair every day. Or it just gets too oily. I think my father had the same problem. I have to shower in the morning too, if I take a shower at night by late afternoon it is already looking like it is wet.

Dogs Akimbo 211,594 32
10/12/2008 08:56 AM

Thar he blows!?

Call me Ishmael.

Maverick Independent Chickens 286,580 61
10/12/2008 10:00 AM

If someone can figure out how to tap the oil reserves (sorry to use that word) of Suicide Rangers hair we might be able to solve the global energy crisis.

Chance 171,275 14
10/12/2008 10:02 AM

Ha! Sorry SR, my reading comprehension is for the birds!

Chance-izz got yer candy right here mister. 171,275 14
10/13/2008 03:03 PM

Why do you not have feeling in your nipples? Have your hooters been surgically altered?

I may or may not have had something cosmetic done.

Lets just say that breast feeding leaves your tatas flat and ugly sometimes.