Hello my name is Steve, I enjoy spiking my alcoholic beverages with Rohypnol while sleep walking. I've found it quite difficult keeping my hands off of myself, and have been incarcerated 3 times that I am aware of and 6 other times of which I am not completely sure for Premeditated Manual Stimulation.



Also known as PMS.



I've begun the recovering process by attending (PMS) anonymous meetings, however, I'm not convinced that it is working because every time I show up I have half a dozen irritated women saying "What the Frost are you doing here?"



Lynda (my sponsor) keeps hanging up on me, and the Police arrested me for stalking. The Judge recommended that I get help by going to a group aimed at rehabilitating those with my condition.



He ordered that I join "Persons who are Mentally codependent Stalkers" or...you got it (PMS)



I said: "That's exactly what I've been doing your honor! That's where I met Lynda and the other 6 women! For Frosts sake man!"



I was sentenced to 2 years in prison for 7 counts of stalking.



I was sent to the "Penitentiary for the Morbidly Stealthy" or...you got it (PMS)



-S

TimmyTheTalkingToilet 11,593 15
01/25/2009 02:20 PM

Oh, ok then.

Have fun with that.

Just Chance 171,275 14
01/25/2009 03:21 PM

Devilman, I like you. You've been single handedly trying to keep the funny alive and for that I applaud you. I know its a hard job as I've tried it before to no avail. You sir, have much potential. Thank you for giving me something to read as these other Frost-ing slackers have let the ball drop. Kudos to you!

Your What?! Hurts? 5,582 10
01/25/2009 03:46 PM

I no longer have access to the barbituates that would make this Shakespeare funny.

So, kudos to YOU!

Just Chance 171,275 14
01/25/2009 04:17 PM

I dont see you trying to make with the funny. At least he/she is trying.

Oh yeah, I said it.

Your What?! Hurts? 5,582 10
01/25/2009 04:30 PM

You rooted for the Jamaican bobsled team, didn't ya?

Actually, I was expecting you to threaten to cut me, so I'm feeling okay about all this right now.

Just Chance 171,275 14
01/25/2009 08:33 PM

Meh, Im a lover not  a fighter.

Whistler Hussein McManus 186,130 44
01/25/2009 08:49 PM

Im a lover not  a fighter.

That's what she say's, but she gave two black eyes to the last guy that motorboated her.

Devil Man 32 5
01/26/2009 12:08 AM

Just Chance, thank you for your kind words and the encouragement. I really appreciate it.

Test Tube Baby Now In High Def 828 5
01/27/2009 08:43 AM

Bravo Devil Man!  I don't know if you're a newcomer or not but I admire your willingness to get in there and mix it up.  

For Frost's Sake folks I've noticed some of the snide Shakespearety comments made by some of you who apparently think you're some kind of self appointed Zug Nazi Police or something.    Stop putting this guy down !!       Write something funny or shut the Frost up!

                                   Oh, and for some of you mean mouth Frosters I've got a special jar of peanut butter that I'll make a sammich just for you.  I think it came from a plant in Georgia.

Deck the Pram 80,728 42
01/27/2009 10:48 AM

That's what she says

Exactly!

Test Tube Baby Now In High Def 828 5
01/27/2009 11:14 AM

Hi Pram  Always really good to see you and your stories always crack me up.

Deck the Pram 80,728 42
01/27/2009 11:25 AM

I AM NOT DEVIL MAN

Test Tube Baby Now In High Def 828 5
01/27/2009 11:31 AM

I DID NOT CALL YOU DEVIL MAN

Fratberry 283,028 53
01/27/2009 04:42 PM

Thanks to Devil Man for being the comedic equivalent of a poo-flinging monkey.

Deck the Pram 80,728 42
01/27/2009 05:06 PM

I DID NOT CALL YOU DEVIL MAN

 OKAAAAY!

dammitthedog 127 5
01/27/2009 05:15 PM

I think it's pretty humourous. I like this type of humor.

Fratberry 283,028 53
01/27/2009 05:30 PM

It was meant as a compliment.  Yeesh.