These are difficult economic times. Soon you might not be able to afford food and school supplies for your children. That's why I'm reviewing the taste of non-toxic children's products.

I've previously reviewed pencil crayons and glue. Today I'll be reviewing Play-Doh, comparing the taste of beige to black.

The best thing about a meal of Play-Doh is that it's perfectly acceptable to play with your food before eating it.

I made a tower!

The beige Play-Doh tasted salty and sour. Oddly enough, I expected this exact taste. I must have eaten Play-Doh as a child.

It's a repulsive and strong taste, but not as gag-inducing as white glue. Perhaps it's an acquired taste, like water without whiskey.

But on to the black Play-Doh:

The black Play-Doh tasted exactly the same as the white Play-Doh, but I'm giving the black Play-Doh higher marks anyway. I can't explain it, but it was more filling. It was almost as if the black Play-Doh was bigger somehow.

Overall, I give Play-Doh 3 out of 10 for taste. It's edible, but one of the few foods that would taste better with a side of broccoli.

I hope to review some more non-toxic products in the future, but for now I'm putting away my tasting plate.

John Hargrave 128,751 73
02/05/2009 05:16 AM

Thank you Bob Johnson, for giving of your intestinal lining so that others might laugh.

Le Ravos 63,472 21
02/05/2009 05:29 AM

I think Pram is going to enjoy this article entirely too much.

Your What?! Hurts? 5,582 10
02/05/2009 08:00 AM

I like that you've tucked your shirt into your boxers.  Nice touch.  Classy, even.  Do you have those little garter belts holding up your socks?

Stuttering Sq-q-q-uirrel 53,270 54
02/05/2009 10:05 AM

Overall, I give Play-Doh 3 out of 10 for taste. It's edible, but one of the few foods that would taste better with a side of broccoli.

NON-TOXIC TASTE TEST: FINAL RESULTS

Clear Glue 4/5

Play-Doh 3/5

Crayola Twistables 2/5

White Glue 1/5

How come you guy didn't notice BobJohnson's little bit of awsomeness there? You know he did that to see if people were reading his article or just orbing him because he is "BobJohnson".

Le Ravos 63,472 21
02/05/2009 10:26 AM

Maybe the 3/10 was in comparison to real food, but in comparison to other non-toxic 'edibles' it ranked higher, at a 3/5.

Don't question Bob Johnson.

Space Admiral BobJohnson 178,045 22
02/05/2009 11:10 AM

At BobJohnson Comedy Incorporated Corp. Inc. & Co., we follow industry standards developed by the FDA in the rating of all food products, except when otherwise indicated.  All concerns about discrepancies in the ranking system should be referred to my editor and legal counsel. I regret that I am not able to directly address these concerns myself at this time.  I hope that problems with this particular product or service will not prevent you from enjoying the many other BobJohnson Comedy products on the market today, all of which have passed rigorous consumer testing in excess of that required by government regulation.

chicken nipples 2,207 7
02/05/2009 11:22 AM

Those towers look like peepees!

peoriagrace 6,166 11
02/05/2009 01:08 PM

I made a penis cake once. I used a large Hi-C fruit punch can. It looked so real; I filled the cake mix 2/3s the way up the can. This gave it the nice round head I wanted; also made 2 cupcakes. Frosted it all a fleshy pink. Used some red gel frosting for veins. and dyed some coconut brown for hair. I then cut a piece of the cake off the bottom in a triangular shape; this I used to prop up the penis to give it that aroused look. I used a creme filling which I squirted into the middle of the cake and left some dripping of the head.

This was for a bachlorette party where we also had a lingerie salesperson.

Gonzo 20,522 17
02/05/2009 01:14 PM

I think the PlayDoh would have probably tasted better if you'd put it through one of the McDonalds playsets, and made little burgers, fries and shakes.

I think I just came up a healthy way to eat McDonalds.

orangecorsawus 66 7
02/06/2009 03:07 PM

The smell of play-do is much better than the taste- it smells like almonds and is very enticing but good gravy it makes you boke tasting it.

BTW plasticine is like eating cables and worms!!!

Dogs Akimbo 211,594 32
02/08/2009 11:58 AM

Sure, BobJohnson is awesome. But did he swallow?

BC Bud, shows whats in his pants 13,792 15
02/08/2009 12:36 PM

so thats where the expression "go eat a bowl of dick" came from...