Facebook, as a social network, is generally pretty good at keeping users from being barraged with friend requests and messages from random strangers. However, the occasional weirdo gets through.

I was just added by this girl:

When I asked her if I knew her, she responded:

no, i just searched the interent and found u.

may i make a friend with u?

:)

I responded:

sure! where are you from

She replied:

i come from Taiwan, and i speak chinese.

but now i am in nj to study english.

nice to meet u! =D

She seems to be a moderately attractive mid-20s immigrant from Taiwan that now lives in New Jersey.

It's only so often that one receives an opportunity like this to Frost with a complete stranger that has put themself into your life. I'm preparing to risk my facebook account in the process. So, ZugLivers, what should I say to this poor girl?

Thud 68,506 19
03/02/2009 08:54 PM

Tell her you want to meet up somewhere.  Set up a date at an odd location and at an inappropriate time (e.g. outside a jewelers at 2:38 AM).  Change the date and time frequently.

Explain that the pictures on your Facebook page aren't really of you.  Be evasive about what you actually look like.

When she gets impatient about the whole thing, set one last date to meet and turn over her info to BIG.

The Mailman 176,464 56
03/02/2009 09:42 PM

Tell her that you're an exchange student from Nigeria and that you'd love to become friends with her. Exchange a few messages with, dropping subtle hints that you are romantically interested.

When she takes the bait, start asking her for money.

Juan Campos 1,173 5
03/02/2009 09:59 PM

I'll start with Mailman's idea. Depending on how it goes, I may throw in some elements of Thud's.

The "Asian Laundry" reference will probably go right over her head.

redwing 3,887 30
03/02/2009 10:03 PM

I would start by asking her if she had mentioned to anyone about contacting you, and then invite her over to your place, make sure she brings the laptop.

syncope 49,019 14
03/02/2009 10:04 PM

I like to place ads on Craigslist in the adult jobs section asking for women looking for a few extra bucks to come blow me.

When the responses roll in I plug their email addresses into the little Friend Finder thingy on Facebook and email them back with, "OMG, is this Whatever Name Showed Up?  I haven't seen you since high school!"

I never get many replies past that.

Dogs Akimbo 211,594 32
03/02/2009 10:05 PM

What, you don't have a basement?

Bill the Squirrel 53,270 54
03/02/2009 10:21 PM

So, ZugLivers, what should I say to this poor girl?

Are you that tubgirl chick?

Juan Campos 1,173 5
03/02/2009 10:30 PM

She's not going to be taken in so easily.

Although it is having the desired effect.

Thud 68,506 19
03/02/2009 10:37 PM

Looks like the timing is right to ask her to cyber.  She obviously hitting on you.

Juan Campos 1,173 5
03/02/2009 10:44 PM

Looks like the timing is right to ask her to cyber.  She obviously hitting on you.

What we need in this situation is someone who speaks broken Chinese to feed me sexy lines.

Bill the Squirrel 53,270 54
03/02/2009 10:46 PM

Just say, "Me love you long time".

Thud 68,506 19
03/02/2009 10:47 PM

As odd as this might seem to say, we need Sage to write a poem you could send her.

Chit 178,781 15
03/02/2009 10:51 PM

Sucky-Frosty-Five Bucky!!







That's all the Chinese that I know, but I think it applies here.

 

Juan Campos 1,173 5
03/02/2009 10:53 PM

I never thought this would be a question I'd have to ask, but: Where should I say I'm from?

Thud 68,506 19
03/02/2009 10:56 PM

Baltimore.  Everyone knows people from Baltimore are a bunch of sick Frosts nice guys.

Bill the Squirrel 53,270 54
03/02/2009 10:57 PM

Say, "You tell me first". Then when she does research it and say, "Hey I'm from there too". Sure way to get some.

Chit 178,781 15
03/02/2009 11:14 PM

Where should I say I'm from?









Shwinghai.

 

Terran Nytefyer 3 4
03/03/2009 06:07 AM

Where should I say I'm from?

Tell her you have family from what used to be Outer Mongolia, and your real last name is "Hun."

Dogs Akimbo 211,594 32
03/03/2009 07:23 AM

and your real last name is "Hun."

That works for Bal'more, too.

dammitthedog 127 5
03/03/2009 07:55 AM

Don't Frost with her, just Frost her.

Then after the fact, tell her you have AIDS.

Bill the Squirrel 53,270 54
03/03/2009 09:51 AM

Don't Frost with her, just Frost her.

Then after the fact, tell her you have AIDS.

I'm thinking you and Robster should get together. You both are Frost-ing idiots.

Terran Nytefyer 3 4
03/03/2009 12:34 PM

I'm thinking you and Robster should get together. You both are Frost-ing idiots.

Now, wait . . . are they both Frost-ing idiots, or are they both Frost-ing idiots?

manhole 21,656 29
03/03/2009 01:12 PM

I think he meant they're both Frost-ing idiots.

Le Ravos 63,472 21
03/03/2009 03:12 PM

I think he meant both.

Woof Woof Dammit 127 5
03/03/2009 04:01 PM

We would be both if we got together..........

Cruz : Pyrophile 9,993 12
03/03/2009 04:11 PM

We would be both if we got together..........

You know I honestly believe that, if you hadn't been chemically castrated several years ago for luring schoolchildren into your house with promises of "Candy" and "Treats", that would be a distinct possibilty. As it stands now you'll just have to rub your raw, rotten stump against her leg and see if she gets off on it.

Good luck with that,.

Love Cruz

PS I think we could be really good friends

Bill the Squirrel 53,270 54
03/03/2009 05:14 PM

Why is it that every time I look at the title of this thread, I think about peeing on somebody?

Pram 80,728 42
03/03/2009 05:28 PM

I'm thinking you and Robster should get together. You both are Frost-ing idiots.

So is the dipShakespeare who posted his Facebook Juan.

Pram 80,728 42
03/03/2009 05:28 PM

Fields.

Woof Woof Dammit 127 5
03/03/2009 07:12 PM

 You know I honestly believe that, if you hadn't been chemically castrated several years ago for luring schoolchildren into your house with promises of "Candy" and "Treats", that would be a distinct possibilty. As it stands now you'll just have to rub your raw, rotten stump against her leg and see if she gets off on it.

Good luck with that,.

Love Cruz

Thank you for your life's story. It took a lot of virtual balls to say that. 

Now I'm off to the strip club!

Woof Woof Dammit 127 5
03/04/2009 04:30 PM

I want to bump this thread, because its really funny.

Lobster *Butter not included* 18,570 33
03/04/2009 04:35 PM

I'm gonna go ahead and say NO, IT Frost-ing ISN'T!!!

Kisses!

Lobster