Well, maybe not so much "triumphant"  as "not very impressive". So, how goes it people? Don't think I've partaken of the Zug crack in several months now. What's the haps? Who's hated most? Who's given undue credit for being funny when they're really not? Where are the n00bs? Are we still saying "catbox" and things like that?

Gawd, I'm old.

Pants 14,252 17
04/10/2009 04:47 PM

Bill is definately not getting enough clickies considering all the whorish posts he makes.

How have you been dearie?

TheVelveTurd 6,553 10
04/10/2009 04:52 PM

It goes good, Pram or maybe me, tie between Bill and Lobster, your looking at one, and "catbox"?? ...you people are weird.

Lila - deserving of your scorn and hatred 78,555 13
04/10/2009 05:14 PM

 We're still hating Pram? It's like I never left!

Test Tube Baby Bunnies 828 5
04/10/2009 05:38 PM

Nice to finally meet you.  You're like a goddess and I must say you're even more lovely in person.

Chicken McNipples 2,207 7
04/10/2009 07:11 PM

Hi

Lila - deserving of your scorn and hatred 78,555 13
04/10/2009 07:13 PM

 Who's the (assumed) chic who just kissed my ass? I like her.

Millie 116,988 28
04/10/2009 07:17 PM

Hi.



And to the person above Lila, your name confused me except you didn't have the custom icon, so I knew you weren't the real Chickens. 

Juan: Animal Collectivist 1,173 5
04/10/2009 07:24 PM

I knew you weren't the real Chickens

Well of course they aren't. The real Chickens is dead.

Pants 14,252 17
04/10/2009 07:27 PM

Well of course they aren't. The real Chickens is dead.  

Shhhhhh.  Juan you'll just upset the ladies again.

Pretend Chickens is like The Tooth Fairy or The Easter Bunny.

Colored Egg Shell 77,143 25
04/10/2009 08:47 PM

Hi, Lila!

Nice to see you again. How's the little'un?

Lila - deserving of your scorn and hatred 78,555 13
04/10/2009 08:53 PM

 Shel Bell! Nice to see ya, hon. The rugrat is fantastic, thanks for asking. And how are yours? You have more than one, if memory serves. Am I right?

And Mils - good to see you're still around after all this time. I see Lowe's is still treating you like Shakespeare. Sorry to hear that, cupcake. I was hoping life would be treating you a bit kinder at this point.

peoriagrace 6,166 11
04/10/2009 10:34 PM

Hi Lila, I can't remember if you like me or not or vice versa?! Anyway hope things are going well for you.

it's me 62 5
04/10/2009 11:03 PM

Hi there Lila, I am relatively new to zug.  Not sure I have made you aquaintence or not as of yet.  I tend to stay in the back round and not post a whole lot yet.  Glad your back and hope your funny!

TableTopJane 173,958 15
04/11/2009 12:23 AM

 I do adore the Lila, and I'm glad she's back. 

Please don't ever leave us again. We can't handle it. Trae is getting all fat and Shakespeare, so we need you around to look at.

spleendingo 157 7
04/11/2009 02:27 AM

I don't know you. Therefore I'm the N00B you mentioned.

Hitler is less hated than me. And Pram is more hated than Hitler.

Do the math. Nice to make your acquaintance.

Lila - deserving of your scorn and hatred 78,555 13
04/11/2009 04:44 PM

 Janey! Glad to see you stuck around too. Tell me who I'm supposed to hate so I don't have to take the trouble getting to know everyone, will you love?

Wino Willie McManus 186,130 44
04/11/2009 08:05 PM

LILER!

Wino Willie McManus 186,130 44
04/11/2009 08:21 PM

It's cool to hate Lobster and Pram now, but I don't buy in to that.  I cut slack to the retarded.  Chit and Thud are the kings of the comedy hill, with Shelle trying to wrest the title of queen from the still strong Chance and Undies.

Declan can't post because of some problem with his computer not liking the new ZuG.  I don't post as much as I used to because the new site doesn't load properly on my Treo.  Chickens moved, and took a new job, and very rarely posts.  When he does, though, he still isn't funny.

It's good to know you're still alive and well.  Give my best to your boys.

Test Tube Baby Bunnies 828 5 takes hat off and bows to Wino Willie McManus
04/11/2009 11:42 PM

Sir, you are a very fair and kind hearted man.  I don't know your brother personally

but please give him my regards.  Your folks did a fine job of raising both of you.

Wino Willie McManus 186,130 44
04/12/2009 12:00 AM

Your folks did a fine job of raising both of you.

I'll be sure to tell all six of them you said so.

P*H*L*A* 131,068 34
04/12/2009 12:05 AM

What. The. Frost.

Let me show you how it's done people:

Hello dear, are you new?

Pubah 56,813 18
04/12/2009 12:13 AM

My dear, delectible, delicious, delightful, undeniably likeable...Lila 

Welcome back, my dear...

How's Beal Street and Danny Thomas Blvd?  

Test Tube Baby Bunnies 828 5 sniffs, smells drama and retreats
04/12/2009 12:13 AM

(lookin' like it might get ugly in here.  I don't she's new here)

Test Tube Baby Bunnies 828 5 relaces "the" with 'think"
04/12/2009 12:37 AM

Should'nt drink and Gab.  My bad. G'night.

Pubah 56,813 18 Hands Test Tube a Bloody Mary and a quart of Gatorade
04/12/2009 11:38 AM

Happy Easter. How's the hangover, Mon Ami?

Test Tube Baby Bunnies 828 5 Thanks Pubah profusely
04/12/2009 06:11 PM

Whew, I gotta lay off the cheap wine. 

Chance will boil your bunny 171,275 14
04/12/2009 06:30 PM

Welcome home Lila!

That test tube thing is annoying as Frost.

Thats all the advice i have.

Test Tube Baby Bunnies 828 5
04/12/2009 06:51 PM

That test tube thing is as annoying as Frost

You're just mad because you'll never be as big a bitch as I am.

Solid Chocolate Jeeni 47,795 51
04/12/2009 07:15 PM

Test tube. I've seen Chance's bitchy side. This is the only thing I can compare it to. You don't want to get on her bad side.

Solid Chocolate Jeeni 47,795 51
04/12/2009 07:16 PM

Hi Lila. Welcome back. I don't believe we've met. Enjoy the new zug!

UnderPeep 101,398 77
04/12/2009 07:19 PM

Welcome Back Lila.

Dogs, I am disturbed that you have that photo, only because I had the fear that maybe you have Spicey's ass stashed somewhere too.

Test Tube Baby Bunnies 828 5
04/12/2009 07:31 PM

Nice try Jeeni but I'd have to say largely unsuccessful /or believable.

Ditdah 123,110 14
04/12/2009 08:09 PM

I agree with Jeeni. No one wants to be on Chance's bad side. You'll end up missing important body parts. Then your family gets an oozing package, and cops get involved, and somehow you get arrested for it...

It's so not worth it. Just be nice to her.

Test Tube Baby Bunnies 828 5
04/12/2009 08:39 PM

Just be nice to her.

How about this for a philosophy....Don't start none        Won't be none

Fairly self explanatory.  In case you have forgotten this whole thing started with

the hateful "bleeding eyes when reading the big eyed girl posts."  And there were

several of those.    So don't sit there like you don't understand and I'm talking to

more than one of you.  Have you figured out yet that this country girl won't back down.

If you haven't, you're awfully slow.  

Juan Campos 1,173 5
04/12/2009 08:55 PM

How about this for a philosophy....Don't start none        Won't be none

Fairly self explanatory.  In case you have forgotten this whole thing started with

the hateful "bleeding eyes when reading the big eyed girl posts."  And there were

several of those.    So don't sit there like you don't understand and I'm talking to

more than one of you.  Have you figured out yet that this country girl won't back down.

If you haven't, you're awfully slow. 

Holy Frost-ing Shakespeare. How are you going to come onto a comedy board and get butthurt that people say things that might be a little mean? Like I said in another thread, you don't do anything but kiss ass for clickies. You're a parasite on the system. Your survival, and the survival of LIVE as a whole, depends on people actually being funny rather than sycophantic.

And don't act tough, like you're going to intimidate someone over the Frost-ing internet. Ditdah contributes to LIVE, albeit to a lesser degree than she did back when it was GAB, probably because there are so many people like you on the board. Her presence on the board is actually valuable, rather than draining like your presence is.

I hate to be an Emerson, because that's not how I want to be, but sometimes I just need to call people on their bullShakespeare.

Juan Campos 1,173 5
04/12/2009 08:56 PM

<!-- rant-->

Wino Willie McManus 186,130 44
04/12/2009 09:02 PM

this country girl won't back down

Just a quick question:  have you ever been to New York City?

Ditdah 123,110 14
04/12/2009 09:22 PM

In case you have forgotten this whole thing started with the hateful "bleeding eyes when reading the big eyed girl posts."

So, I started all this? Sheesh - sorry. If I appologize, will you stop being grumpy and try and have fun? It's a comedy board, and we're here to have fun. Lighten up and join in.

And John, I can't spell for Shakespeare, and the text editor makes my spellchecker run away. Can you make it come back? If not I may have to start writing my text in Word first, but I really don't want to look like Nutbutter.

He's too flat chested. I'd never eb able to wear a low-cut shirt again.

TheVelveTurd 6,553 10
04/12/2009 09:26 PM

The Suck up: This gabber is a master of the ass kiss. Testing our ability to tu be objective as to their motives, they shower you with compliments in hopes that the kind words will make you forget the purpose of the site and reward them with clickies designed to reward humor and not feel good affirmations. They can be quite successful at this with less funny gabbers needing the boost in confidence, but are scorned by the hiearchy.

Ditdah 123,110 14
04/12/2009 09:27 PM

Ditdah contributes to LIVE, albeit to a lesser degree than she did back when it was GAB, probably because there are so many people like you on the board. Her presence on the board is actually valuable, rather than draining like your presence is.

Wow, thanks Juan. Seeing as how I used to be a total bitch to you when you were an underager, it's nice of you to stick up for me.

Although, I've been MIA because of real-life crap, not because of anything on board. Things like my roof and ceiling colapsing into my bathroom have drawn my attention elsewhere. But I'm trying to stick around more now, so a whole new group of people can call me a damn dirty dyke or slam on me for being obsessed with ZuG. 

I'm a glutton for punishment.

Ditdah 123,110 14
04/12/2009 09:29 PM

Erm...ah...welll... Yeah. A veteran would never fall for someone complimenting them. No way.

Professor Nutbutter 181,311 35
04/12/2009 09:29 PM

 He's too flat chested. 

You've obviously never taken a really good look at my pathetic floppy man tits.

Ditdah 123,110 14
04/12/2009 09:31 PM

You've obviously never taken a really good look at my pathetic floppy man tits.

Well, it's hard to focus when you're licking my cheek.

Juan Campos 1,173 5
04/12/2009 09:32 PM

Well, what are you waiting for?

SUYT!

Juan Campos 1,173 5
04/12/2009 09:33 PM

That was to Nutbutter, sorry. Iknew I should have quoted him in the post!

Professor Nutbutter 181,311 35
04/12/2009 09:38 PM

 SUYT!

When is The Internet going to figure out that doesn't work?

Dogs Akimbo 211,594 32
04/12/2009 11:12 PM

maybe you have Spicey's ass stashed somewhere too

I would have bet good money that no one would ever say that to me.

Sippin Straw 98,019 37
04/12/2009 11:14 PM

It's a comedy board, and we're here to have fun. Lighten up and join in.

Pubah 56,813 18
04/12/2009 11:58 PM

Woa, I wanna dance with somebody!

Wino Willie McManus 186,130 44
04/13/2009 12:23 AM

You've obviously never taken a really good look at my pathetic floppy man tits.

SCHWING!

Test Tube Baby Bunnies 828 5
04/13/2009 12:37 AM

I hate to be an Emerson, because that's not how I want to be, but sometimes I just need

to call people on their bullShakespeare.

That is EXACTLY what I've been trying to say Juan.   Calling people on their bullShakespeare.

Don't like it .   Don't diShakespeare out.    Very interesting the suck up kiss ass you did on Ditdah.

Hmmmmm...smacks of hypocritical wouldn't you say?  

Wino Willie McManus 186,130 44
04/13/2009 12:42 AM

Scroll up, TTB, and see yourself kissing my ass.

I'm just sayin'.

Test Tube Baby Bunnies 828 5
04/13/2009 02:21 AM

Whistler, you missed my point.  Since Juan thought it was interesting to point out "ass

kissing" I thought I would do the same for him which I did.     Everything more clear now ?

Solid Chocolate Jeeni 47,795 51
04/13/2009 03:23 AM

PSA: If there's anything I've learned from zug, is that it's not funny when you have to explain it.

Solid Chocolate Jeeni 47,795 51
04/13/2009 03:53 AM

...and don't get your panties in a wad and take that personally. I'm trying to help you, not harrass you.

TheVelveTurd 6,553 10
04/13/2009 09:16 AM

smacks of hypocritical wouldn't you say?

Only if that was Juan's normal MO. However he's more about the slam than the schmooz. A compliment isn't a bad thing as long as it's deserved and not gratuitous. Just stop the bipolar pissed///patronizing Shakespeare and you'll catch alot less hell.

Professor Nutbutter 181,311 35
04/13/2009 09:20 AM

SHUT UP, ALL OF YOU!  Sheesh!

This thread is about Lila, and her "triumphant" return or some Shakespeare.

Ditdah 123,110 14
04/13/2009 09:23 AM

You're just mad no one's talking about your chest anymore.

Billy the Bunny 53,270 54
04/13/2009 09:33 AM

Your survival, and the survival of LIVE as a whole, depends on people actually being funny rather than sycophantic.

We're Frosted!

TheVelveTurd 6,553 10
04/13/2009 09:40 AM

This thread is about Lila, and her "triumphant" return or some Shakespeare.

Yea, I think she thought better and retreated.

Lila - deserving of your scorn and hatred 78,555 13
04/13/2009 10:13 AM

 Actually, I just have a 14 month old and sometimes forget I can have a life outside of toddler world. 

I just logged in, saw my thread and thought, "Hey! It's really taken off! How awesome that so many want to welcome me back." Then I saw that I instead had inspired a flame war and was even MORE ecstatic! Happy returns to meeeee.

KChiki in Bunny Ears 128,392 98
04/13/2009 10:33 AM

 Hey woman! Glad to see you back! 

TheVelveTurd 6,553 10
04/13/2009 10:43 AM

Isn't it funny how the most innocuous threads can erupt into arguments. It reminds me of marriage. I've had those rides home from a social gathering where I made a comment  I thought was innocent and then suffered for every stupid thing I've ever said since we laid eyes on each other. I understand homosexuality now although I'm not gay. I've often thought to myself  " I'd rather take a big Coleridge in the ass than to have to listen to another word come out of her mouth!!" A guy would be like " Hey do you remember that time 10 years ago at my mothers house when you..blah. blah." and I'd be like " No" and he'd say " No, neither do I.  Cause I'm a DUDE!!"

Lobster with a side of Matzoh 18,570 33 enters the converstion late, as usual
04/13/2009 12:44 PM

Hey, Lila! How's the rugrat?

AmyPoo: sporadic at best 2,710 12
04/13/2009 01:15 PM

I guess I picked a good time to drop in.  I wish I could remember why you annoyed the piss out of me all those years back.

Professor Nutbutter 181,311 35
04/13/2009 01:17 PM

Give it about five minutes, it'll come back to you.

Thud 68,506 19
04/13/2009 07:18 PM

Hey there, Lila.  Nice to see you back.  Not too much has changed, just different names for some of the same characters.  N*thyn keeps dropping by.

Colored Egg Shell 77,143 25
04/13/2009 08:14 PM

with Shelle trying to wrest the title of queen from the still strong Chance and Undies.

The three of us should mud wrestle for it. I'm pretty sure I would lose, but wouldn't it be fun?

Pubah 56,813 18
04/13/2009 09:34 PM

Not half as fun as watching the three of you wrestling.

Can we spray you with baby oil and butterschotch?

Chance will boil your bunny 171,275 14
04/13/2009 10:09 PM

Haha, that Test Tube thingy gets its panties in a wad all the time over me. I'm so Frost-ing pleased that it bothers it that much. I better be careful before it tries to reach through my monitor and teach me a lesson! What a Frost-ing idiotic dipShakespeare. Your "country ass" doesnt have to back down. I can do this all day long, I just choose not to.

Lila - deserving of your scorn and hatred 78,555 13
04/13/2009 10:45 PM

Chance, that post made such little sense that I clickie'd it anyway. That and I'm half lit. Here's to having a toddler who sleeps easily and a fridge that can accomodate a "large" bottle of cheap wine!!

Pram eats cholit bunnies ASS FIRST! 80,728 42 looks shy, wrings his hands, and avoids eye contact
04/13/2009 11:04 PM

We're still hating Pram? It's like I never left!

I wanted to keep everything the way you like it so you would have a nice return.

Pubah 56,813 18
04/13/2009 11:06 PM

Box wine, Lila...Box wine

Pram eats cholit bunnies ASS FIRST! 80,728 42
04/14/2009 07:17 PM

NO ONE APPRECIATES ME!

Shell is not a Belle 77,143 25
04/14/2009 09:53 PM

I would appreciate you more if you knew how to spell chocolate.

Juan Campos 1,173 5
04/15/2009 12:16 AM

I would appreciate you more if you knew how to spell chocolate.

Ohhhh, that's what "eats cholit bunnies" means? I assumed it was some weird shoe-masturbation subculture slang for "masturbate with a shoe."

At this point, I'm really not trying.

Test Tube Baby 828 5
04/15/2009 12:26 AM

I could do this all day long but I choose not to.

And you're still talking about it.........Why?

No response required as this is only a rhetorical question.

Pram eats cholit bunnies ASS FIRST! 80,728 42
04/15/2009 10:50 AM

• 0 votes 0.0 1822304 Pubah 04/13/2009 11:06 PM
  

  Box wine, Lila...Box wine

  
  


• 
  

   

  
  


• 
  

  I had a dream about that last night, but WOAHHH, I COPIED TOO MUCH THERE.

  
  


• 
  

   

  
  

Pram eats cholit bunnies ASS FIRST! 80,728 42
04/15/2009 10:52 AM

Here ya go, Pubah.

• Rating Received 1 votes 5.0 You already rated this message Pubah 04/13/2009 11:06 PM
  

  Box wine, Lila...Box wine

  
  

Lila - deserving of your scorn and hatred 78,555 13
04/15/2009 11:22 AM

 My thread about returning is teh fail.

Trae Spawn On Board 156,790 17
04/15/2009 11:32 AM

Hello my lovely!!!   I'm not on here that much these days.  I'm getting married in 3 weeks and having a baby BOY in 3.5 months so I've been kind of busy.   Glad to see you again!!!

Pubah 56,813 18
04/15/2009 11:56 AM

Trae Married!?!?

One more sign the Apocalyps is upon us...

I wish you well anyway.  Is Eric invited?

Chance will boil your bunny 171,275 14
04/15/2009 02:29 PM

My nipples are still delicious!

Mothcleaner 4,106 10
04/15/2009 03:09 PM

Where's the proof?

Fratberry 283,028 53
04/15/2009 03:14 PM

having a baby BOY in 3.5 months

This way she'll still have someone who will have sex with her when she's 70.

Fratberry 283,028 53
04/15/2009 03:15 PM

And he's 15.

Chit 178,781 15
04/15/2009 03:29 PM

  Is Eric invited?





HOW THE HELL is she supposed to answer that without a last name, and maybe a birthday and a home town thrown in there for reference?



 

Trae Spawn On Board 156,790 17
04/15/2009 03:43 PM

Eric is an old poster who used to be Pubah's sidekick but has since gone the way of many...... you know, left.

No one is invited though.  No one.

Especially Fratberry the Cat Froster

Chance will boil your bunny 171,275 14
04/15/2009 03:49 PM

Trae, dude...please tell me you havent lost your sense of humor! You seem crabby!

Trae Spawn On Board 156,790 17
04/15/2009 04:00 PM

I have a baby doing the Riverdance on my bladder today.  It's making me a little edgy.

You're the second or third person who told me that I seem that way.  Hmmmm.... no my sense of humor is still intact.  Just hormonal today I suppose.

Trae Spawn On Board 156,790 17
04/15/2009 04:02 PM

But Frat is still a cat Froster.

We all know this.

Wino Willie McManus 186,130 44
04/15/2009 04:33 PM

I have a baby doing the Riverdance on my bladder today

I swear I'm not the father.

And I really, really hope I get to see pics of her in the maternity wedding dress.  Nothing says classy southern belle quite like a maternity wedding dress.

Thud 68,506 19
04/15/2009 06:02 PM

I was about to say something mean and tasteless about Trae (nothing personal, just saw an opening), but this thread is about Lila so I didn't.

These new meds seem to have mellowed me.

Bill the Squirrel 53,270 54
04/15/2009 06:30 PM

These new meds seem to have mellowed me.

It could be the new gel insoles you got for your shoes.

Frogpop 173,153 25
04/15/2009 10:22 PM

He probably just ate too many Peeps last weekend.

UnderWhere? 101,398 77
04/16/2009 05:55 AM

But Frat is still a cat Froster.

Yes, but at least he knows enough to wear a condom, or uh, make sure they're spayed or neutered first.

Ravos, A-boi-oi-oing! 63,472 21
04/16/2009 07:31 AM

It could be the new gel insoles you got for your shoes.

We aren't talking about Pram here...