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KABLOOEY!!!
A comedy article by The happy bouncy and somewhat twisted one 82 4
06/09/2009 12:48 AM 219 views
A few days ago, I suggested an idea for a story. The idea was to put a bunch of things in the microwave and see which one made the coolest explosion. I decided to start with a nice egg. I swear to god, the explosion was such that it blew the door open and gooey mess and bits of shell splattered everywhere! My sister had come over to watch and eggy goo wound up in her mouth! You haven't seen funny until you see a 17 year old girl dancing around the kitchen spitting raw egg everywhere. On a scale of 1-10, I give that explosion a 5.


Marshmallow
Next, I used jet puff marshmallows. At first nothing happned. Then, like a creature rising from a swamp, a massive bubble swelled. I watched as it grew bigger and bigger until it burst! It looked like the pillsbury doughboy blew up. The microwave was so full of steaming goo, I was afraid I broke it at first. I was distracted after by the marshmallow giving a feeble hiss, and dying (sob).
on the boom scale I gave it a 3-10

CD
After cleaning my edible glue, I popped a CD in. As it started spinning a lightshow started. The doomed disk started giving of sparks, and even little balls of plasma. finally with an almighty CRACK and a shower of sparks, it broke in half. I opened the microwave and started choking on a cloud of thick black smoke. The damage wasn't much and cleaning up was a breeze.
I gave this one a 4-10

Last but not least, fireworks!
I am rather attached to my microwave. Therefore, I used my sisters! First, nothing. Then a spark. Then the scream... It was a shrill scream, the kind to remind you of homocide. And indeed, the fireworks did commit homocide. Now, I owe my sister a new microwave. Although, it was worth it no doubt.
FULL MARKS FOR FIREWORKS!!! NEW MICROWAVE FOR SISTER!!! PLEASE POST PLACES THAT SELL GOOD MICROWAVES! LETTERS ARE SILENT, BUT HOW AM I SHOUTING?!
PICKLES!!!!!!!!!!!

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Amusing 1 votes 1.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828531
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33 Comments on "

KABLOOEY!!!

"
(Funniest: Frogpop,peoriagrace,Pants)


  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828532
The happy bouncy and somewhat twisted one 82 4
06/09/2009 12:49 AM

I know, it kinda stinks.
 

Funny 9 votes 3.7 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828534
Frogpop 173,153 25
06/09/2009 01:06 AM

Tell us more about warm sticky white goo dripping from your 17 year old sister's mouth. That should keep the locals busy enough to leave you alone.

For now.
 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828535
The happy bouncy and somewhat twisted one 82 4
06/09/2009 01:44 AM

So. Wrong. Besides, it was orange,
 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828536
The happy bouncy and somewhat twisted one 82 4
06/09/2009 01:45 AM

And cold
 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828537
The happy bouncy and somewhat twisted one 82 4
06/09/2009 01:46 AM

microwave didn't help temperature.

 

Funny 3 votes 3.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828548
Dogs Akimbo 211,594 32
06/09/2009 08:08 AM

happy bouncy, you get hit in the back of the head with the screen door a lot, don't you?
 

Funny 1 votes 3.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828551
Bill the Squirrel 53,270 54
06/09/2009 08:46 AM

I'm thinking, his deal would be more along the lines of running head on, into the sliding glass door. Repeatedly!
 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828552
Like a Ravos 63,472 21
06/09/2009 08:50 AM

I'm thinking, his deal would be more along the lines of running head on, into the sliding glass door coke. Repeatedly!
 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828585
The happy bouncy and somewhat twisted one 82 4
06/09/2009 01:33 PM

I got the effing joke!
 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828592
The happy bouncy and somewhat twisted one 82 4
06/09/2009 02:11 PM

And if by "his", you ment me, I'M A GIRL!!!
 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828593
The happy bouncy and somewhat twisted one 82 4
06/09/2009 02:12 PM

I know I spelled meant wrong.
 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828594
The happy bouncy and somewhat twisted one 82 4
06/09/2009 02:14 PM

By, the damage wasn't much, I meant, to the microwave.
 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828599
Like a Ravos 63,472 21
06/09/2009 02:45 PM

By, the damage wasn't much, I meant, to the microwave.

I think you need to learn how to use commas.
 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828601
The happy bouncy and somewhat twisted one 82 4
06/09/2009 02:50 PM

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
,,,,,,,,,................
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!?
???????????
 

Amusing 1 votes 1.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828604
Mothcleaner 4,106 10 Thinks to himself OUTLOUD!
06/09/2009 03:17 PM

Hmmmmmm....


What was that rule about flooding the bored with inane drivel again?
 

Funny 1 votes 3.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828606
Pants 14,252 17
06/09/2009 05:03 PM

I swear to god, the explosion was such that it blew the door open and gooey mess and bits of shell splattered everywhere!

Either you have a lucrative lawsuit against the manufacturer of that microwave or your pants are smoldering and you are about to be cast down to hell.
 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828608
Thud 68,506 19
06/09/2009 05:22 PM

No pictures? No video?

I'm going to go with the 7 to 5 bet on the "Fat Daughter" line.
 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828609
The happy bouncy and somewhat twisted one 82 4
06/09/2009 06:04 PM

With the egg I knew that would happen because my aunt did it when I was 8. Well, I kind of knew. It was worse with my aunt. Back then, it actually broke the microwave. Here there was just mess, and now I'm afraid that the dog's going to get salmonella from licking some of the goo.












2 weeks later: Hey, what's that white thing in the dogs crap?
 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828610
The happy bouncy and somewhat twisted one 82 4
06/09/2009 06:06 PM

No pictures or video because they never work. I can never get things off my camera OR phone.
 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828611
The happy bouncy and somewhat twisted one 82 4
06/09/2009 06:07 PM

I did get SOME, but by the time I did, it was too late (sniff).
 

Funny 1 votes 3.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828614
Thud 68,506 19
06/09/2009 06:24 PM

No pictures or video because they never work. I can never get things off my camera OR phone.

Check the camera's manual, look under the section labeled "Operator Headspace". You might find the problem described there.
 

Chuckleworthy 1 votes 2.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828621
Dogs Akimbo 211,594 32
06/09/2009 07:33 PM

happy bouncy, you seem sort of ditzy. Which means that if you can fix a motorcycle and have a father who owns a bar, you're perfect!
 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828628
The happy bouncy and somewhat twisted one 82 4
06/09/2009 09:48 PM

Ha ha. My stepdad is a programmer, and my bio- dad makes large sheets of metal in a factory. For some reason, even with what my stepdads job is, I STILL can't figure out compuers. *sigh*
 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828629
The happy bouncy and somewhat twisted one 82 4
06/09/2009 09:49 PM

compuers= computers. TYPO!
 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828630
The happy bouncy and somewhat twisted one 82 4
06/09/2009 09:51 PM

If I can't use Computers right, I know NOTHING about motorcycles (I fixed a broken scooter at age 10 though).

 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828631
Dogs Akimbo 211,594 32
06/09/2009 09:52 PM

What about the motorcycle thing?
 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828640
The happy bouncy and somewhat twisted one 82 4
06/09/2009 10:10 PM

Nope. In the end I'd be as focused as I am when someone sneaks up on me with a camera, which is to say, not.

 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828716
peoriagrace 6,166 11
06/10/2009 12:37 PM

I love riding on motorcycles.

Once when trying to ride a kick start motorcycle; I learned that no matter how much I worked out I would never be as strong as a man who is my size or taller. I tried everything to get this bike going. I even tried to use both legs to kick start it. I had to let my boyfriend start it for me. So I just try and appreciate men for what they are.


Pickle jar openers.
 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828723
The happy bouncy and somewhat twisted one 82 4
06/10/2009 12:58 PM

They have pickle jar openers? And on a different note, I'm in quarentine! It was really just a stomach bug, but I was quarentined for swine flu. Now I can zug more often because I was kicked out of the last few days at collage this semester.
 

Funny 1 votes 3.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828770
Thud 68,506 19
06/10/2009 06:01 PM

Art student with swine flu? Has comedy potential.
 

Hilarious 1 votes 4.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828782
Pants 14,252 17
06/10/2009 07:01 PM

So I just try and appreciate men for what they are.
Pickle jar openers.

After decades of use the lid to your pickle jar has to be pretty easy to open.




Sings* "Who put the pickle in the pickle jar?"
"Who me?"
"Yeah, you."
"Couldn't be."
"Then who?"
"Pants put his pickle in the pickle jar."
 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828786
The happy bouncy and somewhat twisted one 82 4
06/10/2009 07:48 PM

Ded I sireeously jest spel collij rong?

 

Funny 2 votes 3.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828804
peoriagrace 6,166 11
06/11/2009 01:53 AM

After decades of use the lid to your pickle jar has to be pretty easy to open.


It's always been easy to open; just doesn't hold alot.
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