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Irony and the ant
A comedy article by Tali S Woman 25 6
06/10/2009 12:58 PM 289 views

A few years ago, my grandmother gave my daughter an ant farm for Christmas. My daughter was amazed by any animal so this was a great gift for her. She wanted to open it and start using it right at my grandmother's house but alas you had to send in a card to order the ants to use in your farm.



Three weeks later a small package arrived at the door and my daughter, who was ten then, started jumping up and down, excited to finally be able to use her ant farm. I opened up the box to expect some annoying little black ants that we could have gotten outside if we didn't live in the tundra of Western New York in January.

The infinite wisdom of this company was to send poisonous red ants!




I was wary, but added the 20ish ants to the farm and we started watching the ants immediately. We were fascinated with their tunnel building. One of the ants die not long after loading it into the farm and the ants moved it to it's own little area away from everyone else.



Several days later, as were watching the ants as a blizzard raged on outside, my daughter noticed an ant who was off by himself and seemed to be trapped. She decided that the ant wasn't smart enough to get himself out of the tunnel he made for himself so she was going to help him out. Grabbing a drinking straw from the kitchen she opened up the top of the ant farm and tried to make a tunnel to the ant to help him out of his dilemma.



For ten minutes she pushed on the sand to make him a tunnel but as she pushed on the sand she compacted it more and more. In her frustration, she kept pushing harder and harder, almost suffocating the ant she was trying to save. As she tried to figure out how to loosen up the sand, she didn't see another ant crawling up the straw to escape from the farm. Suprised by the pain caused by the poisonous "pet" ant bite, she reacted as most humans would and squashed the brother to the ant she was trying desperately to save.



She quit watching the ants that day and never wanted another habitrail or insect farm again.



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7 Comments on "

Irony and the ant

"

(Funniest: Like a Ravos,Azz Lava,Whistler P. McManus)


  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828724
The happy bouncy and somewhat twisted one 82 4
06/10/2009 01:05 PM

For my neice, she opned it up and didn't close it so all the ants (the annoying black ants) got out. From then on ants turned up in the stranges places.

 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828725
The happy bouncy and somewhat twisted one 82 4
06/10/2009 01:06 PM

stranges=strangest

 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828726
The happy bouncy and somewhat twisted one 82 4
06/10/2009 01:06 PM

opned=opened

 

Funny 2 votes 3.5 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828732
Like a Ravos 63,472 21
06/10/2009 01:25 PM

I once had a container of caterpillars which I left open, and around 90 of them ended up all over the house. I thought it was hilarious. My mom busted out the vacuum and sucked them all into a dark, dusty abyss.

 

Chuckleworthy 4 votes 2.3 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828801
Azz Lava 148 4
06/11/2009 01:46 AM

"sucked them all into a dark, dusty abyss"



Nah, too easy.

 

Chuckleworthy 3 votes 2.3 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828887
Whistler P. McManus 186,130 44
06/11/2009 02:40 PM

Nah, too easy.

Frost it, then. I have no shame when it comes to whorbing.


"And the next spring, an amazing flock of beautiful butterflies emerged from Chance's vajayjay."

 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1828913
Lobsta- Now With FIBER!! 18,570 33
06/11/2009 08:23 PM

Bouncy Twisted Guy That Spells SATAN Wrong:

THERE'S A PREVIEW BUTTON FOR A GODDAMN REASON! USE IT!!