Might help if I remembered what my Great-Grand Pappy used to tell me. That is, that we have it easy. He had to walk to school in his pyjamas, in 3 feet of snow, uphill both ways! And penny candy used to actually cost a penny!

Sorry, I was too busy rubbing the attachment on my crotch to actually attach it to my previous email. Here tis...

Oops I forgot to add the attachment.

I always go with:

Now, with new and improved REAL attachment!

I actually met that chick up there. She hangs out on the Royal Mile in Edinburgh, Scotland and takes pictures with tourists. I met her here first, though.

I AM NOT RAVOS' GREAT-GRAND PAPPY!

Whatever you say, Sasquatch Sr.

ZOMG I FORGOTT TEH ATTACHMNET!!!!!!!1

I farted when I realized I didn't send the attachment.

I usually pretend I sent it the first time. Adding to the mythos of not sending it to begin with. Insert IT reasons for failure: Virus scanner, email client, internet, solar flares. I especially loved describing how a solar flare could eat an attachment and the fact that it worked.

"Okay, I sent it again, did you get it /this/ time?"

Okay, here's a real suggestion for John:

"I'm sorry. Someone let me know that people who aren't really computer savvy might not have been able to see the attachment I sent with my earlier e-mail. Here's a simpler version."

I cut and pasted the attachement from MS Word and I guess it doesne(tm)t work when you do that and it also strips out quotes (eoe and eoe) and generally screws things up BECAUSE IT HATES ME!!!

Just like everyone else here, Nutters.

So I got a paperclip and attached the file to the e-mail, but I guess it must have fallen off in transit to you. I sent it again, this time using a stapler. I hope you receive it this time.

It kinds sucks though, I now have glowing spots on my monitor, and there may or may not be ooze seeping from it.

I'd forget my balls if I didn't have an attachment.