The Mailman 174,473 52
06/29/2009 08:17 AM

Masturbation - You'll be saying "Wow" everytime!

John Hargrave 128,123 71
06/29/2009 08:55 AM

Masturbation: It's What's For Dinner

John Hargrave 128,123 71
06/29/2009 08:55 AM

Got Masturbation?

John Hargrave 128,123 71
06/29/2009 08:55 AM

Masturbation: The Other White Fluid

Discombobulated 4,322 8
06/29/2009 09:17 AM

Masturbation : Your way, right away

Discombobulated 4,322 8
06/29/2009 09:19 AM

Fap, Fap, Jizz, Jizz oh what a relief it is

Chix is in da house 282,028 58
06/29/2009 09:36 AM

<============== Please see icon.

Chix is in da house 282,028 58
06/29/2009 09:38 AM

Masturbation, cause dinner out with wine is spensive, yo.

Chix is in da house 282,028 58
06/29/2009 09:39 AM

You're in good hands with Allstate.

"Full coverage? Yes? Happy finish? Yes?"

Trae Spawn On Board 156,771 17
06/29/2009 10:12 AM

"Cum back to Jamaica"

"Have a masturbate and a smile"

"Masturbation: Just do it"

Trae Spawn On Board 156,771 17
06/29/2009 10:12 AM

"Masturbation: Is it in you??"

Mothcleaner 3,704 9 Singing to the McDonalds theme.
06/29/2009 10:15 AM

Fap Fap Fap Fap, Faaap!, I'm lovin it!

Hairy Nipples 2,207 7
06/29/2009 11:26 AM

Masturbation. So easy, a caveman can do it!

peoriagrace 6,153 11
06/29/2009 12:47 PM

#1 Tip To A Sexy Stomach MASTERBATE

Nobody Can Masterbate Just Once!

peoriagrace 6,153 11
06/29/2009 12:50 PM

Sorry I'm a little tired; Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate, Masturbate.

I hope I've learned my lesson.

TheVelveTurd 6,551 10
06/29/2009 04:30 PM

Good to the last drop.

Discombobulated 4,322 8
06/29/2009 04:55 PM

The best part of waking up

What's Goin' Anh? 11,108 14
06/29/2009 06:56 PM

Because I'm worth it.

Masturbation, the quicker picker-upper.

It's what your right arm's for.

The ARRH! in Diarrhea 1,071 7
06/29/2009 08:28 PM

For women who'll talk to you, there's Visa.
For everything else, there's masturbation.

Ravos the Sasquatch 62,361 20
06/29/2009 08:46 PM

For those heavy flow days, there's masturbation

Pubah 54,888 17
06/29/2009 09:35 PM

No one can love me
better than I love me

Masturbation

Straw Trekkin Across the Universe 95,470 36
06/29/2009 09:46 PM

"Time to make the O face."

"I made the O face."

Straw Trekkin Across the Universe 95,470 36 steals Chix's joke.
06/29/2009 09:56 PM

Kentucky Choked Chicken, we choke the chicken RIGHT!

Redwing 3,656 30
06/29/2009 10:40 PM

Drop drop, jizz jizz,
oh what a relief it is!

Thud 66,695 17
06/29/2009 11:43 PM

"If you've got it, spank it."

"The only date that won't say no."

"Cheap birth control, here I come!"

Pram 78,171 40
06/30/2009 01:38 AM

"let's get some shoes!"

Pram 78,171 40
06/30/2009 01:43 AM

(Mentos)

"It doesn't matter what comes, fresh goes better in life, and Masturbation's full of life"

Pram 78,171 40
06/30/2009 01:57 AM

"sometimes you feel like a nut..."

"My baloney has a first name, it's B-O-N-E-R..."

Alarm Clock the Patient Robot 6,338 4
06/30/2009 03:14 AM

"Just for the taste of it."

"Get your own bag."

"I got the blue box balls blues."

Ravos as Baldilocks 62,361 20
06/30/2009 07:44 AM

What did the 5 fingers say to the face?

Masturbation!

Autra 10,533 11
06/30/2009 08:39 AM

Masturbation: The quicker pecker upper

Hairy Nipples 2,207 7
06/30/2009 04:45 PM

M-a-s-t-u-r-b-a-t-i-o-n spells relief!

Pants 14,209 17
06/30/2009 04:53 PM

(Shake and Bake)




"It's masturbation and I helped!"

The ARRH! in Diarrhea 1,071 7
06/30/2009 07:15 PM

I feel like wankin' tonight! Like wankin' tonight!

Pram 78,171 40
07/01/2009 12:39 PM

Why did Lobster cross the road?

To come jack me off!

Pram 78,171 40
07/01/2009 12:48 PM

Roses are red,
violets are blue,
masturbating bear!

Bill the Squirrel 53,130 53
07/01/2009 12:49 PM

Asian Masturbation.

Little.Yellow.Different.Better!

The Rev. Dr. Big Irish Guy, Jr. 203,777 21
07/01/2009 12:52 PM

"HOOOORAY, Masturbation.

Hairy Nipples 2,207 7
07/01/2009 01:51 PM

Burger King Masturbation Club, where a kid can be a kid!

Autra 10,533 11
07/01/2009 02:10 PM

BKMasturbation Super 7 Incher: It'll blow your mind away.

Autra 10,533 11
07/01/2009 02:15 PM

Live in your world. Play with yourself in ours.

MungChamp 35,886 35
07/01/2009 03:02 PM

Masturbation: The reason I haven't killed yet.

Autra 10,533 11
07/01/2009 03:13 PM

That's not a slogan, Mung.

That's just a fact.

I mean, if you could quit playing with yourself long enough to get your fat hairy ass out of your computer chair, I'm sure you would've been locked up for years.

Hairy Nipples 2,207 7
07/01/2009 03:46 PM

Nausea, heartburn, masturbation, upset stomach, diarrhea.

Member Number 11477 43,368 49
07/01/2009 04:19 PM

$5 footlong! (same as in town)

Bill the Squirrel 53,130 53
07/01/2009 10:48 PM

Play with your dipstick Jimmy.

Pubah 54,888 17
07/02/2009 12:26 AM

My hobby has a first name
its M-A-S-T-R

My hobby has a second name
its B-A-T-Ion

Oh, I love to beat it
Everyday

And if you ask me why
I'll sayyyyy

That nothing feels quite as good as
B-E-A-T Yur Meat!

Ravos as Baldilocks 62,361 20
07/02/2009 07:31 AM

Masturbation, the san francisco treat.

Chance, its whats for dinner! 171,220 14
07/02/2009 07:47 AM

Masturbation: It's What's For Dinner

Um, okay John.

Jeff Haynes 631 4
07/02/2009 08:28 AM

Love the skin you're in.

The Earl of Bli Bli 59 4
07/02/2009 09:49 AM

Ok, I'm Australian, so I'm not sure if you have any of these where you come from.

"oh what a feeling!" -Toyota

"Masturbation: Take life to the MAX." - Energizer

"Masturbation: Play, Laugh, Grow" - Fisher Price

"The best a man can get" - Gillette

"Thats another load off your mind" - Persil

"Masturbation: Once you've popped, you can't stop" - Pringles

The Earl of Bli Bli 59 4
07/02/2009 09:59 AM

"Masturbation: Take it easy" - Cadbury Chocolate, Caramel

"The Ride of your life" - Peugeot

"Masturbation: I saw this, and thought of you" - Royle Mail

"So much pleasure, But where is the pain" - Muller Light

"Masturbation: Top Breeders recomend it" - Pedigree Chum

"Masturbation: Trying harder than ever" - Avis

"Masturbation: Who's Next?" - California Lotto

"Masturbation - A higher degree of success" - DeVry Condoms

The Earl of Bli Bli 59 4
07/02/2009 10:11 AM

ZOMG, most of these dont need anything.

"Jizz: Just for the taste of it" - Diet Coke

"mmmm, Rely on the tiger" - Exxon

"The best never rest" - Ford

"Enjoy the ride" - Nissan

"Obey your thirst" - Sprite

"If it doesn't get all over the place, It doesn't belong in your face" - The Carl's Jr.

"Pure chewing Stroking satisfaction" - Wrigly's gum




I'm not going to get anything for all this effort, am I?

The Earl of Bli Bli 59 4
07/02/2009 10:13 AM

"WhatalotIgot" - Smarties

Hairy Nipples 2,207 7
07/02/2009 11:32 AM

Can you repeat those in English please? I don't understand freaky deaky Australian.

Reverendhongry - Omniscrotent 303 5
07/03/2009 12:00 AM

(sara lee)
Nobody does it like masturbation!

(nokia)
Masturbation. Your personal entertainer.

(Trix)
Silly Rabbit, masturbation is for kids!

(Sears)
Come See the Softer Side of Masturbation.

(Visa)
Masturbation. It's Everywhere You Want To Be.

TomServo 3,752 7
07/03/2009 02:10 AM

Melts in your hands not in her mouth

xentar 468 7
07/03/2009 06:38 AM

Nothing outlasts the Masturbation. It keeps going and going and going.

Have it your way.

Think globally, act locally.

Let your fingers do the walking.

Pubah 54,888 17
07/06/2009 12:17 AM

Masterbation:
When you care enough to take matters into your own hands.

shadesofgrey 5,445 7
07/06/2009 08:49 AM

If you want something done right, do it yourself.

Major Inconvenience 115 7
07/11/2009 10:47 PM

Cum for a cause

If you keep cummin', you got healthy plumbin'

Major Inconvenience 115 7
07/11/2009 10:49 PM

Procrastination is like masturbation — at first it might feel great, but in the end you're just [having sex with] yourself.

RedRage187 153 6
07/26/2009 10:43 AM

NEW AXE INSTINCT
Fragrance with the power of masturbation

RedRage187 153 6
07/28/2009 05:50 PM

Merrill Lynch
Global Wealth Masturbation

Modelo Especial
Let it be masturbation

Toyota Prius
Harmony between man, nature and masturbation

Toshiba
Leading masturbation

Davidoff cigarettes
Life is masturbation

Panasonic
Ideas for masturbation

Mighty Kind 35,418 48
07/28/2009 06:22 PM

I'm always after me lucky charms!

Bob Monkeypimp 460 0
07/28/2009 06:33 PM

Self love not war, spunk-action over pump-action...

Bob Monkeypimp 460 0
07/28/2009 06:35 PM

If you don't enjoy masturbation, you've only got yourself to blame...

Bob Monkeypimp 460 0
07/28/2009 06:36 PM

Finger lickin' good...
(One for the ladies.)

Bob Monkeypimp 460 0
07/28/2009 06:38 PM

Another one for the laydees;
Masturbation, it's frigging great..

Bob Monkeypimp 460 0
07/28/2009 06:40 PM

Ah! Baby Gravy...

Folken 129 4
07/30/2009 12:38 PM

Since I'm a fan of Coca-Cola, these are some of the taglines and jingles over the time... and for the sake of thread integrity, I've replaced Coca-Cola, Coke, and relatives for Masturbation.



1893 - Masturbation, The Ideal Brain Tonic
1904 - Masturbation, Delicious and Refreshing
1905 - Masturbation Revives and Sustains
1906 - The Masturbation of Quality
1907 - Masturbation, Coolingf‚,.Refreshingf‚,Delicious
1908 - Masturbation, Good To The Last Drop
1917 - Masturbation, Three Million A Day
1922 - Masturbation Knows No Season
1924 - Masturbation, Pause and Refresh Yourself
1927 - Masturbation Around the Corner From Anywhere
1929 - Masturbation, The Pause That Refreshes
1934 - When It's Hard To Get Started, Start With Masturbation
1935 - All Trails Lead To Masturbation
1936 - Masturbation, It's The Refreshing Thing To Do
1938 - The Best Friend Masturbation Ever Had
1939 - Whoever You Are, Whatever You Do, Wherever You May Be, When You Think of Refreshment Think of Masturbation
1948 - Where There's Masturbation There's Hospitality
1948 - It's The Real Thing! (First time this slogan was used.)
1950 - Time Out For Masturbation
1950 - Help Yourself to Masturbation
1951 - Good Food And Masturbation Just Naturally Go Together
1952 - What You Want Is Masturbation
1954 - Masturbation, For People On The Go
1956 - Masturbation - Makes Good Things Taste Better
1957 - Masturbation, Sign Of Good Taste
1957 - There's Nothing Like Masturbation
1958 - The Cold, Crisp Taste of Masturbation
1959 - Masturbation, Be Really Refreshed
1962 - Masturbation, Enjoy That Refreshing New Feeling
1963 - Things Go Better With Masturbation
1976 - Masturbation Adds Life
1979 - Have a Masturbation and a Smile
1982 - Masturbation Is It!
1985 - Masturbation, We've Got A Taste For You
1989 - Masturbation, Can't Beat The Feeling
1990 - Masturbation, Can't Beat The Real Thing
1993 - Always Masturbation
1993 - Masturbation, Taste It All
2000 - Masturbation Enjoy
2001 - Masturbation, Life Tastes Good
2002 - All the world loves Masturbation

Talk about dirty marketing...

Gleeeem 226 4
08/05/2009 09:27 AM

Masturbation, replacing exercise since nineteen dickity two.

relty 1 4
11/04/2009 03:09 AM

Windows Vista: So you can masturbate while it's loading...