Mighty Kind 7,190 7
08/21/2009 05:52 PM

"No Really, I can't run naked anymore or I'll knee myself in a nut with every stride."

MungChamp 22,622 16
08/21/2009 05:56 PM

"I know this is a long shot, but do you happen to have a Werther's Original?"

I are Nipples 2,132 5
08/21/2009 05:57 PM

"WHAT?"

mielke 1,438 3
08/21/2009 06:04 PM

"Sooooooo now with Anna Nicole gone who's going to spend my millions"

TheVelveTurd 4,931 3
08/21/2009 06:31 PM

"..... so if people wanted shrimp, Bubba Gump shrimp is what they got. Then Lieutenant Dan took some of that money and.."

Shell Belle 31,380 9
08/21/2009 06:41 PM

"How about dinner? If we hurry, we can make the Early Bird Special. Sirloin steak and a baked potato for $7.99!"

mielke 1,438 3
08/21/2009 06:48 PM

"What's a Tranny?"

The Mailman 130,735 14
08/21/2009 07:17 PM

"Your video got 4,000 views on Youtube? That's cute. My picture got a lot more hits than that: I'm one of the guys on Lemonparty."

A Summer Sweaty Ass......HAT 2,009 3
08/21/2009 08:58 PM

Wanna see my little Rip Van Winkle? Its been sleeping for about 20 years or so, you've woken it up.

Mr.Coffee 807 8
08/21/2009 11:49 PM

"Hey little girl, you wanna buy some candy?"

Lupie 26,463 6
08/22/2009 12:38 AM

"Let me show you what I mean by 'deep vein thrombosis'".

peoriagrace 5,962 9
08/22/2009 01:58 AM

Huh, speak up honey my hearing aid just went out.

Macka 2.0 1,465 2
08/22/2009 10:00 AM

I Shakespeare you not, I'm Benjamin Buttons and I'm 17 years old. Wanna Frost?

mielke 1,438 3
08/22/2009 10:27 AM

Hey pops can ya hear me now?.....can ya hear me now?

FunkyMunky Aka "Weezy" 312 1
08/22/2009 11:08 AM

.."And you see pretty lady when I wore the heart of the ocean and jack sketched me, I posed like this. "

Whistler P. McManus 141,536 23
08/22/2009 12:40 PM

Whistler's old?


I'm 637 in internet years.

Macka 2.0 1,465 2
08/22/2009 07:18 PM

I'm 637 in internet years.


n00b!

Alarm Clock the Chubby Robot 5,980 4
08/23/2009 12:17 AM

Baby, it's wrinkled for her pleasure.

Pubah 47,449 11
08/23/2009 04:34 AM

...Really, I was creative advisor for the Grumpy Old Men trilogy...wanna ride my bolonga pony?

Lupie 26,463 6
08/25/2009 04:27 PM

I used to play for the Green Bay Packers, but now I'm with the Vikings.

Unknown Duck 498 1
08/26/2009 04:57 AM

When I was your age I had to walk 40 miles, up hill, in the snow, to find a nice hooker like you.

Now I just go to craigslist and 10 minutes later they are knocking on my door

Unknown Duck 498 1
08/26/2009 04:58 AM

At least our ducks are lined up.

Quack.

Warudor 48 2
09/06/2009 03:04 PM

Look I told you, it's gonna work, it always has!

buy blu cigs and laught at the rest 10 1
09/08/2009 04:25 AM

What do you think he is looking at?

a: a text message from his mother saying son I know you are on LSD right now but would you like to come over to the house for a family dinner. everyone is in town so just quit tripping and come over.

b. A picture of his wife in a gangbang that he stumbled across on the internet while looking a porn.

c. or add your own comment

Thud 53,122 10
09/08/2009 04:33 AM

What does that have to do with this thread?

Mielke 1,438 3
09/08/2009 05:43 AM

It's an instant message from his mom to come upstairs for dinner.

Mom:buy blu cigs and laught at the rest get off the porno box and come up from meat loaf.

TomServo 3,733 5
09/08/2009 02:58 PM

"Once you go old you never.... erm, where am I, who are you?"

RaisinBean 143 1
09/08/2009 08:13 PM

Hey Little Girl.. Why don't you come on over here and sit on my lap? I'll give you a piece of candy.......

Sethonious 11 3
09/08/2009 09:38 PM

Your mouth says twenty, but your eyes say freebie...

Pubah 47,449 11
09/09/2009 12:49 AM

Age ain't nothin but a numbuh

Wanna go halves on a baby?

I don't see nothin wrong, with a little bump and grind

Your Booootieeeeee!

Trickster 171 1
09/10/2009 12:20 AM

"You'll have to speak up love.. Did you say you WOULD touch my Coleridge?"

Mielke 1,438 3
09/10/2009 02:23 AM

Yes my Cancer is terminal ......and all I want before I die is to try that bum sex that all the kids are doing now a days.




I promise I wont tell your Grandma.

redrockriot 61 1
09/10/2009 06:54 AM

Well, you heard of "blue blocker" shades...well those you just tried on were olefoggie foggles...put em back on and let's party!!!

Warudor 48 2
09/12/2009 09:28 PM

You sure do remind me of my daughter...

Professor Fucksock 1,080 3
09/13/2009 12:18 AM

I'd love to bend you over my zimmerframe...

SardonicObserver 0 7
09/14/2009 07:46 AM

You say you have beans and franks? Hey, leave that be and let's go have some Mandarin.

Mielke 1,438 3
09/14/2009 08:26 AM

You sure do remind me of my daughter...




That's because I am Dad!

Pubah 47,449 11
09/14/2009 08:37 AM

When I was your age...
Men were men:
- and the women gave us permission to say so.
- and the sheep ran scared.
- and the women were satisfied.
- and dinosaurs roamed the earth.

Sully 350 7
09/16/2009 08:26 PM

You haven't lived until you've done it in a Craftmatic Adjustable Bed.

Trae - Sleepless in Atlanta 156,239 10
09/20/2009 07:25 AM

So, yeah... I can Go! Go! Go! In my HoverAround!

Wanna ride?

A B C Easy as 1 2 Lobstah 9,797 9
09/21/2009 03:58 AM

At least our ducks are lined up.

Quack.

Those aren't ducks, Duck. They're butt-plugs.

Termite 0 6
09/28/2009 03:56 AM

Really!?!? You're a out-of-work geriatric home health care worker?

The guy who rotated your drink 78 2
09/28/2009 06:40 PM

Sweetheart there's a reason my right leg ain't bendin'. And I ain't got arthritis.

Drowning Fish 202 2
09/29/2009 11:00 AM

That's not the only thing that smells like moth balls.

WE tar TED 17 1
10/15/2009 07:39 AM

She take my money when I'm in need
Yea she's a trifflin friend indeed
Oh she's a gold digga way over town
That dig's on me

Now I aint sayin she a gold digger
But she aint messin wit no broke niggaz