Mighty Kind 35,418 48
08/21/2009 08:52 AM

"No Really, I can't run naked anymore or I'll knee myself in a nut with every stride."

MungChamp 35,886 35
08/21/2009 08:56 AM

"I know this is a long shot, but do you happen to have a Werther's Original?"

I are Nipples 2,207 7
08/21/2009 08:57 AM

"WHAT?"

mielke 1,480 5
08/21/2009 09:04 AM

"Sooooooo now with Anna Nicole gone who's going to spend my millions"

TheVelveTurd 6,551 10
08/21/2009 09:31 AM

"..... so if people wanted shrimp, Bubba Gump shrimp is what they got. Then Lieutenant Dan took some of that money and.."

Shell Belle 76,640 24
08/21/2009 09:41 AM

"How about dinner? If we hurry, we can make the Early Bird Special. Sirloin steak and a baked potato for $7.99!"

mielke 1,480 5
08/21/2009 09:48 AM

"What's a Tranny?"

The Mailman 174,473 52
08/21/2009 10:17 AM

"Your video got 4,000 views on Youtube? That's cute. My picture got a lot more hits than that: I'm one of the guys on Lemonparty."

A Summer Sweaty Ass......HAT 11,234 21
08/21/2009 11:58 AM

Wanna see my little Rip Van Winkle? Its been sleeping for about 20 years or so, you've woken it up.

Mr.Coffee 881 10
08/21/2009 02:49 PM

"Hey little girl, you wanna buy some candy?"

Lupie 26,981 11
08/21/2009 03:38 PM

"Let me show you what I mean by 'deep vein thrombosis'".

peoriagrace 6,153 11
08/21/2009 04:58 PM

Huh, speak up honey my hearing aid just went out.

Macka 2.0 1,491 4
08/22/2009 01:00 AM

I Shakespeare you not, I'm Benjamin Buttons and I'm 17 years old. Wanna Frost?

mielke 1,480 5
08/22/2009 01:27 AM

Hey pops can ya hear me now?.....can ya hear me now?

FunkyMunky Aka "Weezy" 316 4
08/22/2009 02:08 AM

.."And you see pretty lady when I wore the heart of the ocean and jack sketched me, I posed like this. "

Whistler P. McManus 183,262 42
08/22/2009 03:40 AM

Whistler's old?


I'm 637 in internet years.

Macka 2.0 1,491 4
08/22/2009 10:18 AM

I'm 637 in internet years.


n00b!

Alarm Clock the Chubby Robot 6,338 4
08/22/2009 03:17 PM

Baby, it's wrinkled for her pleasure.

Pubah 54,895 17
08/22/2009 07:34 PM

...Really, I was creative advisor for the Grumpy Old Men trilogy...wanna ride my bolonga pony?

Lupie 26,981 11
08/25/2009 07:27 AM

I used to play for the Green Bay Packers, but now I'm with the Vikings.

Unknown Duck 530 6
08/25/2009 07:57 PM

When I was your age I had to walk 40 miles, up hill, in the snow, to find a nice hooker like you.

Now I just go to craigslist and 10 minutes later they are knocking on my door

Unknown Duck 530 6
08/25/2009 07:58 PM

At least our ducks are lined up.

Quack.

Warudor 48 4
09/06/2009 06:04 AM

Look I told you, it's gonna work, it always has!

buy blu cigs and laught at the rest 10 3
09/07/2009 07:25 PM

What do you think he is looking at?

a: a text message from his mother saying son I know you are on LSD right now but would you like to come over to the house for a family dinner. everyone is in town so just quit tripping and come over.

b. A picture of his wife in a gangbang that he stumbled across on the internet while looking a porn.

c. or add your own comment

Thud 66,695 17
09/07/2009 07:33 PM

What does that have to do with this thread?

Mielke 1,480 5
09/07/2009 08:43 PM

It's an instant message from his mom to come upstairs for dinner.

Mom:buy blu cigs and laught at the rest get off the porno box and come up from meat loaf.

TomServo 3,752 7
09/08/2009 05:58 AM

"Once you go old you never.... erm, where am I, who are you?"

RaisinBean 151 4
09/08/2009 11:13 AM

Hey Little Girl.. Why don't you come on over here and sit on my lap? I'll give you a piece of candy.......

Sethonious 16 6
09/08/2009 12:38 PM

Your mouth says twenty, but your eyes say freebie...

Pubah 54,895 17
09/08/2009 03:49 PM

Age ain't nothin but a numbuh

Wanna go halves on a baby?

I don't see nothin wrong, with a little bump and grind

Your Booootieeeeee!

Trickster 175 4
09/09/2009 03:20 PM

"You'll have to speak up love.. Did you say you WOULD touch my Coleridge?"

Mielke 1,480 5
09/09/2009 05:23 PM

Yes my Cancer is terminal ......and all I want before I die is to try that bum sex that all the kids are doing now a days.




I promise I wont tell your Grandma.

redrockriot 71 5
09/09/2009 09:54 PM

Well, you heard of "blue blocker" shades...well those you just tried on were olefoggie foggles...put em back on and let's party!!!

Warudor 48 4
09/12/2009 12:28 PM

You sure do remind me of my daughter...

Professor Fucksock 1,133 3
09/12/2009 03:18 PM

I'd love to bend you over my zimmerframe...

SardonicObserver 0 9
09/13/2009 10:46 PM

You say you have beans and franks? Hey, leave that be and let's go have some Mandarin.

Mielke 1,480 5
09/13/2009 11:26 PM

You sure do remind me of my daughter...




That's because I am Dad!

Pubah 54,895 17
09/13/2009 11:37 PM

When I was your age...
Men were men:
- and the women gave us permission to say so.
- and the sheep ran scared.
- and the women were satisfied.
- and dinosaurs roamed the earth.

Sully 601 9
09/16/2009 11:26 AM

You haven't lived until you've done it in a Craftmatic Adjustable Bed.

Trae - Sleepless in Atlanta 156,771 17
09/19/2009 10:25 PM

So, yeah... I can Go! Go! Go! In my HoverAround!

Wanna ride?

A B C Easy as 1 2 Lobstah 17,422 30
09/20/2009 06:58 PM

At least our ducks are lined up.

Quack.

Those aren't ducks, Duck. They're butt-plugs.

Termite 2 9
09/27/2009 06:56 PM

Really!?!? You're a out-of-work geriatric home health care worker?

The guy who rotated your drink 86 4
09/28/2009 09:40 AM

Sweetheart there's a reason my right leg ain't bendin'. And I ain't got arthritis.

Drowning Fish 222 4
09/29/2009 02:00 AM

That's not the only thing that smells like moth balls.

WE tar TED 17 3
10/14/2009 10:39 PM

She take my money when I'm in need
Yea she's a trifflin friend indeed
Oh she's a gold digga way over town
That dig's on me

Now I aint sayin she a gold digger
But she aint messin wit no broke niggaz